The Consultant
by 2amWritersClub
Summary: AU Fiction; A childhood incident alters Spencer Reid's life, however his path still crosses with the BAU and one agent in particular. Can he prove himself worthy of being part of the team and can Emily Prentiss admit to herself what he could mean to her?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer - I don't own the characters in this work of fiction and make no profit from them.**

This starts early Season 3, around the time of 'Doubt' and 'In Name and Blood', with a tiny bit of canon twisting to suit the story. I know that Reid falling asleep in Gideon's office happens at the beginning of Doubt however for my purposes I have moved that scene post Doubt.

We begin with Gideon's disappearance and Hotch and Prentiss, having stuck to their guns with Strauss, returning to the BAU. Reid has never officially worked for the BAU at this point but is a friend of Gideon's and an acquaintance of Hotch's. Gideon still arranged to play chess with Reid and, just as it occurs in canon, Gideon didn't turn up.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter One**

Emily Prentiss kicked off her pumps and grabbed the nearly full bottle of scotch and a short tumbler from the kitchen worktop. Dangling them between her fingers she padded over to the huge window that gave her apartment a stunning view of Capitol Hill. She liked this view, the bible-black sky providing a perfect backdrop for the illuminated walls of the White House, a perfect tableau to contemplate whilst she pulled her mind from the train wreck that had been the last few days.

Working the BAU was a tough gig. The very nature of the work was wearing on the mind and the long, antisocial hours were gruelling on both the body and the social life. Given this, the last thing the team needed was Erin Strauss on their backs and Gideon doing a disappearing act.

Emily shook her head and knocked back a finger of scotch. Thinking of Erin Strauss made her skin prickle with injustice. How that woman could undermine one of her _own_ teams was beyond Emily and how she could target Aaron Hotchner in particular left her speechless. Almost. She hadn't been speechless when she'd stepped into Hotch's office and handed him her letter of resignation. She hadn't been speechless when she'd taken her dig at Strauss and she didn't regret it. She _really_ did hate politics, especially Erin Strauss' brand.

Thinking of Jason Gideon made her stomach sink and her eyes sting. She felt so conflicted over him. She understood the horror of what he had been through and the turmoil it had unleashed in his mind but to abandon them all and leave Hotch to fight the battle with Strauss alone was unforgivable. Hotch had steeled himself. He had stepped up to the plate when it would have been easier to step away from it, better even, for both his soul and his marriage, but he hadn't stepped away. He hadn't given in. She herself had been close. But then Hotch had turned up and stoked the fire of injustice burning in her gut and as usual Emily ignored the internal voice of common sense that rang suspiciously like her mothers' and followed him back down the rabbit hole.

Gideon should have done the same she thought ruefully as she poured another glass. They were already a man down before he'd ditched and he knew how hard they had to work to compensate for their odd number. It was strange really. Theirs was the only team that had five members. All the other teams had six plus an allocated Technical Analyst. Over the years they occasionally had a new body drafted in with the hopes that they would settle and stay but it never happened.

The last try had been Jordan Todd. Emily got on with her well enough but Jordan never really fit. She tried and the team tried, but in the end the job simply beat her and she went back to the safety of Counter Terrorism. Emily laughed into her glass. When you started to think of other departments in the FBI as the safe option it spoke volumes to the horror of what the BAU saw each day. Maybe she shouldn't have followed Hotch. Maybe she should have stepped back. She couldn't though. She was part of the _team_. Hotch, Morgan, JJ, Garcia and Emily. And Gideon?

Emily didn't need what was going to happen spelled out for her. Wearily she closed her eyes against the emptiness of her apartment and held the glass up in a mock toast to the night sky.

'And then there were five.' She whispered.

**

* * *

**

Despite limiting her drinking session to three small glasses, mainly so she didn't start to feel maudlin over her consistently empty bed, Emily still felt the effects of the scotch the next morning. Her stomach burned and her head felt fuzzy enough to make her glad to get off the lurching elevator. As she pushed her way through the glass doors that opened into the bull pen she almost walked into JJ.

'Woah! You ok?' Emily asked.

'What, oh sorry. I'm ... have you seen Hotch?' JJ asked.

'No. I just walked in. Are you ok, you seem a little ... flustered?' Emily said.

JJ shook her head. 'There's this guy.' She started.

'Ooh, tell me all about it.' Emily said.

'No. Not a _GUY_, guy. I mean there a guy, in Gideon's office. Asleep.' JJ said.

'_Asleep?_' Emily repeated.

'Asleep, and I have no idea who he is. Should I call security, should I wake him up or wait and see if Hotch knows if Gideon is expecting him?' JJ shot a worried look up toward Gideon's office door.

'I have no idea, although I doubt Gideon will show.' Emily raised her eyebrows and followed JJ's gaze. 'Does he look ... ok?'

'Ok?' JJ said.

'Yeah, you know. Ok, not dangerous, or anything.' Emily replied.

'He's asleep Emily, I can't tell. And anyway how many UnSubs do we come across that look completely normal.' JJ said.

'Point taken. Come on. We'd better go see who he is.' Emily dumped her coat and purse on her desk, straightened her jacket and headed for the stairs.

'Let's make it quick.' JJ said, waving a fist full of files in the air. 'We've got a bad one.'

'Great.' Emily rolled her eyes, making her head throb a little more.

**

* * *

**

'Sir? Excuse me, Sir, are you OK?' Emily leaned forward and raised her voice a little as she took in the sight of the young man sprawled in one of Gideon's uncomfortable office chairs. He was pale and thin with a tangle of brown hair and had dressed, as far as Emily could see, in his grandfather's clothes.

'He has a security pass, look.' Emily gestured toward the pass that was slung around the man's neck.

'No calling security then.' JJ said.

'I don't know about that. We may need them to carry him out, apparently he sleeps like the dead.' Emily said as she pressed her hand firmly on the strangers shoulder. 'Sir?' Emily gave the shoulder a small shake.

Abruptly the stranger shifted back in the chair and screwed his eyes up. Both Emily and JJ stepped back as the man shoved his hand through his unruly hair, tugged his sweater straight and blinked furiously.

'What time is it?' He said, as if it weren't unusual for him to wake up in a strange place.

Emily bit back the urge to laugh at his puzzled expression. The urge passed when he gazed up at her. He had the warmest eyes Emily had ever seen and as he licked his lips and blinked again Emily felt her stomach give a little flip.

'It's a little after eight thirty. Are you expecting Agent Gideon?' Emily asked.

'What?' The man rubbed his eyes again and attempted to push himself up straight in the chair, his face twisted in a pained grimace.

'Did you sleep here _all night_?' JJ asked over Emily's shoulder.

'Umm, I guess so. I was supposed to meet Agent Gideon here. We were supposed to play chess and he wanted me to ...' The man stopped abruptly as if he suddenly seemed to realise that he didn't know to whom he was talking. 'Sorry. Please excuse me, I had an appointment and I must have dozed off, I ...' He rubbed his eyes again and shifted awkwardly where he sat.

'JJ, I've been looking for you. I thought you were gathering everyone?' Hotch said from the doorway making both Emily and JJ jump.

'Hotch, yes. I have the case files here, I just...' JJ gestured behind her toward the young man.

'_Professor Reid?_' Hotch said.

'Agent Hotchner. It's good to meet you again.' The young man replied giving Hotch a small wave.

Hotch stepped into Gideon's office. 'It's been a while Professor, the last time we spoke was during the Bale case.'

'It was. I was saddened by the outcome of that particular scenario.' Professor Reid replied.

Hotch nodded slightly. 'I never got the chance to thank you for your help with that _and_ for providing Jason with some welcome distraction whilst he got himself back together afterward.' Hotch said.

Professor Reid flushed and shook his head. 'It was an honour to have him co-teach with me. My students loved him and in any case he returned the favour when he set up the cadet lectures for me.'

'Do you have an appointment with Jason?' Hotch asked.

'I think I may have slept through it.' Professor Reid huffed a small laugh. 'He's been chasing me for an answer on that proposal and your Section Chief Strauss has been applying pressure also. She isn't one for employing subtlety or patience is she?'

'No. No she's not.' Hotch replied.

There was a moment of awkward silence before JJ cleared her throat.

'I should gather the team.' She said as she waved a handful of manila files in front of her. 'It was nice to meet you Professor.' She smiled and turned to leave grabbing Emily's arm as she moved toward the door.

'Good to meet you also Miss ... um...,well, thank you both for the wake-up call.' Professor Reid called after them.

Emily turned in the doorway to see the man give her a small, awkward smile. She would have smiled back but Hotch chose that moment to step forward and close the door.

* * *

'Who and what was all that about?' Emily said as she and JJ walked briskly to the round table room.

'I have no idea.' JJ replied as she started sliding the files around the table.

'What _proposal_ and what does it have to do with Strauss?' Emily said as she pulled out her chair.

JJ raised her eyebrows at her.

'What? I don't trust her and if she's got something going on with Gideon we need to find out about it. Maybe she's trying to strong arm him out, maybe ...' Emily stopped at the look on her friend's face. 'What?'

'I'm just wishing that I was a profiler so I could identify the look you gave Sleeping Beauty back there.' JJ said, smiling.

'What look? There was no look.' Emily said.

JJ patted her arm reassuringly. 'Sure there wasn't.' She smirked.

* * *

Professor Reid pushed himself forward in the small armchair and gritted his teeth against the pain that flared in his lower back.

'You're not surprised that Gideon missed our meeting.' He said, giving Hotch an appraising glance.

Hotch sighed. 'No.'

'What happened?' Professor Reid asked.

'We had a case that ended ... badly, on a personal level for Jason and afterward he threw himself back into the job but ...' Hotch shrugged. 'I have no idea where he is or if he'll be back. I'm in the dark here.'

The Professor cleared his throat. 'Do you think he'll contact me?' He asked.

'If anyone, I think it would be you, or Stephen maybe.' Hotch said.

'It's been some time since he spoke with his son.' Professor Reid replied. 'If he contacts me I'll let you know and Agent Hotchner, if you could do likewise?

'Of course.' Hotch nodded.

Professor Reid leaned forward and grabbed a battered messenger bag from the floor and looped it over his shoulder and across his chest before he twisted in the chair, his eyes searching the floor.

'Sorry, do need some help?' Hotch asked. 'I notice you're not using your wheelchair. I take it you're feeling well at the moment?'

Professor Reid smiled up at him. 'I remembered that Jason's office required the negotiation of a flight of stairs, but even so, I have been doing rather well recently so haven't felt the need for it, although, spending the night in this chair might change that. Actually I have my canes around here somewhere. I think they must have slipped to the floor behind ...' The young man twisted back to search the floor behind him.

Hotch stepped forward and stooped to pick up two identical dark wood canes from the floor behind the chair.

'Thank you.' The Professor said as he took the canes and braced them on the floor, pushing himself up stiffly.

'Alright?' Hotch asked.

Professor Reid looked up, blowing a strand of hair out of his eyes. He grimaced, his face paled and he shifted his weight as he rested his hands on the tops of both canes. 'I'm good, thanks. I can find my way out Agent Hotchner. You'll be missed at your briefing.'

He moved slowly past Hotch and toward the door, turning before he reached it.

'You'll call if you hear from him?' He asked worriedly.

'I will.' Hotch said.

**CMCM**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer – See Chapter One

Each Review, Alert and Favourite from Chapter One is appreciated.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Two**

The case JJ had for them _was_ bad but ultimately quick to resolve and the team had found themselves back in Quantico after only two days, with a full roster of phone consults and custodial interviews filling the next four days. It was one of those custodial's that saw Emily and Hotch facing a three hour drive back from Lee State Penitentiary after an arduous interview with an inmate named Jackson Blake. Blake had a thing for brunets in positions of authority and Hotch wanted Emily to go along to put him on the back foot and hopefully get him to open up and talk about his crimes more fully than he had before.

It worked. The information they got from Blake would definitely help them to profile his particular type of offender in the future. Despite feeling the 'win' of the situation Emily felt as though she personally had lost something. After the interview she had the overwhelming urge to go back to the motel they had booked for the night and shower for two hours. Instead she and Hotch had foregone starting their notes and had downed a steady row of beers at a local bar.

It was out of character for them, but Hotch had sensed Emily's unhappiness at being used as intellectual bait in the interview and had suggested alcohol to wash away the experience. It had worked, as had the opportunity for a full night's sleep and a leisurely drive back to Quantico the next morning. It was an indulgence, not rushing back, but Hotch thought they deserved it. They had been on the road for a little over two hours when Hotch's cell phone rang.

'Hotchner' He answered, before falling silent for a moment. 'I see. I can be with you in a half hour. Yes. I understand your concern Professor, I'm just not sure we have any control over ... Alright, I'll see you then.'

Emily watched as Hotch set his phone back on the console and gripped the steering wheel a little tighter.

'Everything ok?' She asked.

'That was Professor Reid. He's received a letter from Gideon. It doesn't sound good.' Hotch said.

'Did he say where Gideon is?' Emily asked.

'No. I don't think he knows and he's worried. I said we'd stop at Georgetown before we head back to the office. I know you're tired and we have files to complete but it's easier for us to go to Professor Reid than it is for him to come to us.' Hotch said.

Emily shrugged. 'Fine by me.'

They drove in silence for a while until Emily's curiosity got the better of her.

'So who is this Professor Reid and why was he having meetings with Gideon?' She asked.

Hotch tensed for a moment.

'It's ok if you can't talk about it. I didn't mean to pry.' Emily said.

'Yes you did, but it's alright.' Hotch replied. 'Jason's known Spencer, Professor Reid, for years.'

'Years? What is he, like a day over eighteen?' Emily laughed.

'He does look rather young, I admit, but he must be about twenty five or so by now.' Hotch said.

'Still young for a Professor.' Emily said.

'Jason told me that he graduated high school at twelve and had PhD's in Math, Chemistry and Engineering by twenty. He's lauded in the academic community and chased by every Government Agency and Research Department in the country.' Hotch said.

Emily raised her eyebrows. 'Wow.'

'Jason met him at a seminar he was giving on the Behavioural Manifestations of Psycopathy. I think Spencer was about seventeen at the time and Jason had him hooked from the moment he opened his mouth. He gradually moved away from the hard sciences and started a fresh rotation in Criminology. He hasn't looked back since. He currently lectures in Criminal Justice, Psychology and Behavioural Science at Georgetown and, behind the scenes, he was instrumental in setting up the Justice Code Think Tank in DC. As a side line Jason has been doing his own brand of unofficial consultations with him for a couple of years now.' Hotch said.

'If he's that good, and Gideon had him eating out of his palm, why didn't he try to recruit him fully, officially, as an Agent?' Emily asked.

'There were ... obstacles to that.' Hotch said carefully. 'Recently Jason was trying to persuade him to leave teaching and become a full time consultant for the BAU.'

'And Strauss? I can guess where she fits in.' Emily said.

'Jason needed someone to back his request and although he didn't want to go to her he understood her personality well enough to know if he dangled Professor Reid like a golden carrot, a very renowned golden carrot, that she would bite. Getting the him within her section of the bureau would be a feather in her cap and she leapt at it.' Hotch sighed.

'You don't sound sure.' Emily observed.

'No, I think Professor Reid has a lot to offer but I'm concerned that Erin thinks she can use him, trot him out to the higher ups as a poster boy. I think Gideon has sold her a bill of goods that's been embroidered to an extent.'

'But you said he was good? I don't understand.' Emily said.

'He's not _good_. He's _phenomenal_, but he's not all that great socially and he won't do Erin any favours in front of the Brass. Also I don't think he's sure himself yet and you know the job Emily. He needs to be sure, and now, without Jason as a security blanket, I just don't know how to advise him.' Hotch said.

* * *

Spencer Reid leaned back in his leather reclining chair and contemplated the two sheets of writing paper on the desk in front of him. Both were nagging at him. One was blank and refused to be filled whilst the other was annoyingly full of things he didn't really want to read.

He'd tried to push Gideon's goodbye from his head by writing to his mother but the words wouldn't come. He felt anxious and restless. If he were physically able he might pace his small office but the night spent asleep in Gideon's office and last night's bumpy car ride to the cabin had left his lower back screaming at him and his left leg irritatingly semi-numb.

He eyed the bottle of pills on his desk, upset with himself that he had ignored all the medical advice given to him over the last thirteen years and pushed himself too far, which had lead to him taking one of the dreaded painkillers. He knew he should have taken two instead of one, the single dose hardly touching the grindingly relentless throb, but after he'd had his "accident" he'd read up on the prolonged effects of prescription narcotics and had resolutely told his doctor that he wouldn't be taking them. His doctor at the time had taken great offence at medical statistics being quoted back at him, but Spencer was immovable on the subject and uncharacteristically stoical for a child in as much pain as he was then.

Since then Spencer had stuck to his guns and rarely took his painkillers. It wasn't often that he needed them. Usually Tylenol would take the edge off but once every few months his body would make a mass complaint if he pushed too much and his lower spine would virtually seize up. When that happened he'd employ various holistic approaches to ease the crippling knots and when that failed he'd hole himself up in his apartment with enough books and DVD box sets to distract him as he rode it out over a couple of days cocooned in his queen sized bed, sometimes with his pillow knotted in his mouth to stifle his cries of discomfort.

Right now Spencer, knowing he hadn't the energy for a massage or acupuncture, was looking forward to an hour in his spa tub and then bed. He'd taught his one class for the day, managed only by using his wheelchair for the first time in over twelve months, and he didn't have any office hours to keep him on Campus. The only thing delaying him from a soothing whirlpool, his hard as granite orthopaedic mattress and episodes four through six of Star Wars, was the impending arrival of Agent Aaron Hotchner.

* * *

'He won't be back, will he?' Spencer said as Hotch placed Gideon's letter back on his desk.

'I don't think so, no.' Hotch said.

Spencer swallowed, suddenly feeling ludicrously adrift in his own life. It was silly, he knew, to feel this way. He'd spent most of his adolescence taking care of himself and he was an adult now, he didn't need Jason holding his hand. He felt his cheeks redden as his eyes prickled.

'Professor Reid ...' Hotch started.

'It doesn't matter.' Spencer said. 'The foolishness of emotionally investing in other people is one of the worst afflictions of the human condition, don't you think?' He slid the letter back into the envelope and dropped it into the desk drawer.

'It's not ...' Hotch began.

'Should we discuss the consultancy position before your Agent gets back from her hunt for coffee?' Spencer said, closing the subject of Gideon effectively.

'You're still interested?' Hotch said.

'Why wouldn't I be? Gideon leaving doesn't change what I want. It makes it more challenging, and I won't deny the support that would have been offered by a familiar presence but I still want to do this.' Spencer said.

'And Strauss and her machinations?' Hotch said.

Spencer gave a brief, shy smile. 'By the time she realises how poor I am in front of a crowd it will be somewhat too late, don't you think?'

'Somewhat.' Hotch replied. 'For what it's worth, I think the team will gain a lot from your inclusion.'

Spencer flushed. 'And I think I will gain from it also.' He said quietly, his hand darting to tuck a strand of too long hair behind his ear.

The subtle change in Spencer's demeanour wasn't lost on Hotch as he watched him shift slightly in his chair, his fingers twisting together in front of his body.

'The other things we discussed, my... ah...physical limitations...is that...will they present issues within the team or during the situations we are called to?'

'As a consultant you'll always be situated in either the local offices or at the LEO's stationhouse. Wherever we set up shop, that's where you'll be. We can try to ensure that wherever we stay overnight is as accessible as possible and that a wheelchair can be on hand if necessary.' Hotch said.

Spencer cleared his throat and flashed another uncertain smile. 'As long as there's a good balance of elevators versus stairs I'll be fine.' He said.

'You're sure?' Hotch said.

Spencer cleared his throat a couple of times. 'I have occasional episodes of pain but they are infrequent and I manage them when they occur. If we're out of state the most I'd need is a decent bed and rest. I could still be of use.' He finished quickly.

'I don't doubt that Professor. It'll be a new situation for all of us, but we'll adapt.' Hotch said.

Reid smiled briefly.

'You know, I'd resigned myself the fact that I'd either lecture for the rest of my life or disappear in some Think Tank somewhere.' Spencer swallowed, hard. 'I can't tell you how much this opportunity means to me. Probably to my students also. I really am the worst lecturer.'

Hotch laughed and held out his hand. 'Welcome to the BAU, Reid.'

After a brief handshake Spencer cleared his throat. 'So when should I start calling you Sir?'

* * *

Emily stood in line at the Costa concession in the Campus refectory. When she'd been in college there were a couple of bad cafeterias which sold bad food and bad coffee. Things had changed a lot she thought as she eyed the Krispie Kreme stand.

'Hi! What can I get for you today?' The perky barista smiled, snapped gum and spoke simultaneously.

'One double Espresso, one skinny Latte and um... one caramel cappuccino with chocolate and a caramel swirl?' Emily grimaced as she placed the order, unsure how anyone could drink that much sugar.

Initially she'd been annoyed at having to stop off at the University on the way back to the office but as soon as she stepped onto the Campus her irritation disappeared. It was infectious, being surrounded by kids. They exuded optimism and happiness. Life had yet to dampen their spirits Emily thought wryly.

She hadn't really wanted coffee but as soon as she'd reached the Professors office her stomach had started to flip annoyingly and she felt herself flush as Hotch introduced her to the Professor, who sent her a small wave of recognition from his seat behind a cluttered desk. He also flashed her a shy smile, identical to the one she got in Gideon's office, and immediately she heard JJ's teasing words about giving him "a look". She'd schooled her features and offered to do a coffee run, taking the Professors sickly order and Hotch's request for the usual, before darting from the room.

After their first meeting in Gideon's office Emily hadn't thought about the Professor at all, apart from when JJ relayed the story of the mysterious sleeping man to Garcia during their pizza and pamper night. Garcia had been giddy at the thought of Emily giving some strange man "The Look" as she'd taken to calling it, saying it was fate. Emily remembered replying that it was more likely gas and that shut Garcia up pretty quickly.

He wasn't even her type. Too young, too thin, too geeky, too badly dressed. Too everything. She never went for that type. He wasn't her ideal at all, in fact her ideal man would have been ...

'Professor Reid?' The barista said.

'What?' Emily said, too wrapped up in her thoughts to have noticed that the girl was speaking to her.

'The large caramel cap with a shake and a swirl? It's for Professor Reid, right?' The barista said.

'Yes.' Emily said.

'Cool. I gave him an extra shot of syrup.' She smiled.

'Really?' Emily said, horrified at the thought.

'Yup. The extra shot's on the house.' The barista said before moving down the line.

* * *

As Emily entered the Professors office she was in time to see Hotch shake his hand.

'Welcome to the BAU, Reid.' Hotch said.

The Professor cleared his throat. 'So when should I start calling you Sir?'

Emily's stomach flipped again and she was horrified to feel her face flush. Taking a deep breath and cursing herself, she kicked the door shut behind her with her heel.

'I'd start right now if I were you. He likes the power.' She said, trying to sound and look nonchalant, as she balanced the three take out cups of coffee in her hands. 'Should I say welcome to the team Professor?'

'Technically I can't be addressed as Professor anymore if I'm no longer teaching so the correct address would be Doctor.'

Emily thought she saw the briefest of smiles flash across Hotch's face.

'Ok, well in that case, welcome to the team, Dr Reid.'

**CMCM**


	3. Chapter 3

For disclaimer see Chapter One

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Three**

There had been three weeks between the semester ending and Reid starting work as a consultant for the FBI and during those three weeks he had done nothing but to second guess his decision. Anxiety constantly burned in his stomach and he spent most days crunching his way through more antacids than was healthy. The morning of his first day was no exception and he ground two between his teeth as he stared into the mirror and fixed his tie.

He knew why he was nervous. It wasn't because he was unsure about the nature of the work. He'd lived and breathed it in a teaching capacity, but that was the problem, _teaching. _Teaching was different to _reality._ How would he perform when the clock was ticking against someone's life?

Yes, he had already helped Gideon during active cases and consults but they were under the guise of coffee at the Smithsonian, where Gideon would pass him a file to peruse, or late night phone calls during which Gideon would pose scenarios for him to comment on. Logically Reid knew that even during those seemingly controlled events the clock _had_ been ticking but Gideon was always there, a flesh and blood barrier between him and the "coal face" of the cases he saw, but Gideon was gone now and Reid knew that he was on his own again.

The other thing on his mind was the team he would be joining. The thought of meeting them made his mouth dry. He had a bad track record with "first days" and whilst he was confident it wouldn't be as awful as High School he wasn't so foolish as to expect it to be trouble free. Everywhere he had ever tried to fit in had proven to be an uphill struggle, ultimately with limited success, and although he didn't really expect that this would be any different a small part of him hoped that this might be the place where he would slot in and feel _right_.

His thoughts jumped to Agent Prentiss. She had been welcoming toward him when they met in his office. She even joked with him a little, about calling Agent Hotchner 'sir', and her friendliness had seemed genuine, her smile open. Maybe she would show him around. Maybe she would talk him through the correct procedures to follow on the consults. Maybe they would become friends.

Spencer swallowed as his mind flashed him a memory of her face. He'd found himself thinking of her the night before, trying to arrive at the correct word to describe her smile. After some deliberation he'd settled on _arresting_. He wasn't sure why, it just seemed to fit.

His fingers flexed around the smooth tops of his canes as he looked at himself in the full length mirror. His palms were clammy and slid over the polished wood. Quickly looking away from his own image he shook his head.

'_Friends_.' He laughed at himself. 'For a genius, you're just dumb.'

* * *

Morgan, Prentiss, JJ and Garcia sat in silence in the meeting room, the quiet only punctuated by the rattle of Garcia's bracelets as she doodled on her writing tablet.

'Hotch did say "meeting in five" right?' Morgan said.

'That's what he said.' JJ replied.

'Yeah. Fifteen minutes ago.' Emily said.

'I coulda' finished half a dozen of the files that are camped on my desk in the time I've been sat on my ass in here.' Morgan complained.

Garcia and Emily both snorted derisively.

'Oh my beautiful friend you and I both know you have many talents but paperwork is not one of them.' Garcia leaned over the table and squeezed Morgan's arm as she laughed at him.

'Hey, I take offense at that. I've been clearing my files in record time the last couple of weeks.' Morgan said.

'With help.' JJ said.

'What? What help?' Morgan said frowning.

'I signed and dated your last six consults.' JJ said, smiling.

'Only because you didn't have the patience to wait.' Morgan smiled.

'Only because the LEO's have my direct dial.' She quipped.

'And I've been taking some.' Emily said, distractedly as she navigated her cell phone. 'How can I have broken another one of these? I swear personnel save the defective ones for me.' She snapped the cell phone shut and slid it across the table to Garcia.

'I can only do so much my dove. I am not a miracle worker.' Garcia said as she started fiddling with the cell.

'If this meeting is about the new guy, why doesn't Hotch just send us a memo? I mean he didn't consult us when he did the hiring so why involve us now?' Morgan said.

'I told you, I don't think it was up to Hotch. Gideon practically had the deal all sewn up before he left. Anyway, he _sounds_ good and he seemed ok when I met him, maybe he'll be a keeper.' Emily said.

JJ smiled and raised her eyebrows at her friend. Emily scowled back.

'And why do we need a Consultant instead of a Field Agent? We need a Field Agent.' Morgan said, ignoring Emily.

'We're supposed to get both; the consultant _and_ a replacement for Gideon.' JJ said.

'Right.' Morgan snapped. 'Sorry. Look, I'm not mad at you guys, you know that, I'm just tired of our team having so much on us all the time. Todd transferred out _nine months ago_ and we've been scratching around ever since. When was the last time you went home at night without taking files with you? Huh? And that goes for all of us.' Morgan shook his head.

'I think Dr Reid should be able to alleviate some of that pressure Morgan, despite his not being a Field Agent.' Hotch said, stepping into the room. 'He'll be joining us today. He's already done some work with Gideon in the past and I'm confident that he has much to offer. Morgan, I understand your concerns regarding the staffing levels of this team and I'm hopeful that the lack of another Field Agent will be addressed in the next few months but for now we have to tough it out.' Hotch said.

Morgan shook his head and sighed. 'Alright, but this guy had better be good.'

'Would you describe _good_ as being impossibly skinny and nervous looking because if it is then I think he's here.'' Garcia said as she leaned back in her chair and peered down into the bullpen.

* * *

'Dr Reid this is Agent Jennifer Jareau our Media Liaison, Penelope Garcia our Technical Analyst, SSA Derek Morgan, and you remember Agent Prentiss?' Hotch said.

Spencer took a steadying breath, hoping it would help to get his heart to stop racing and his stomach to calm. It would be over soon, this charade of pleasant introductions and then he could get himself lost in case files and his co-workers could pretend to not be wondering why the hell Hotch had hired him and what the hell was wrong with him.

He'd been through a lot of introductions in his life and the way he handled them varied. When he was a child, and using his wheelchair more, he'd been inclined to fill in the blanks for people when he sensed them wondering what had happened to him. He'd tell them that he'd had an accident, no details of course, he kept those closely guarded, but he'd say it had left him handicapped and the damage was permanent. It felt good to get the elephant out of the room so he could stop worrying about being asked when his guard was down. That was never good. As a child he'd liked to do things on his own terms to retain control. As a child he had an embarrassing habit of sometimes crying if someone asked him what had happened to him out of the blue. Young Spencer didn't like to be embarrassed _or_ caught off guard. He'd let it happen once. He wouldn't let it happen again.

Adult Spencer was different. He didn't want to share. He didn't want his disability to be an issue, even when he knew it was.

When Agent Hotchner stepped into the bullpen with the team Spencer had already been sitting in a chair at an empty desk. As he deftly grasped his canes and pushed himself up to his feet the first thing he noticed was Emily's smile as it faltered.

* * *

Derek Morgan watched as his new colleague followed Hotch to his office. It hadn't escaped his notice that everyone barring Garcia had been as thrown as he was at the sight of the kid standing up with the aid of two canes. Morgan liked to think that they'd all covered their surprise efficiently but he didn't need to be a profiler to notice the way Reid had flushed and cleared his throat twice as he repeated all their names and nodded his greetings.

There had been a tangible beat of silence after they'd all said hello which had mercifully been obliterated by Garcia who was completely collected, as if she hadn't even registered the man's disability. She'd approached Reid with the force of a guided missile, kissed two of her fingers and pressed them to Reid's forehead.

'Come visit me in the office of Supreme Genius when you're through today and I'll fill you in on everything you need to know to get along around here.' She said before disappearing in a cloud of yellow and black net skirt.

If Morgan's mind hadn't still been reeling he might have laughed at Reid's horrified face and the cerise pink smudge Garcia had left on his forehead. As it was he'd just stood and stared, the silence falling again, until Hotch asked Reid to accompany him to his office.

Sitting heavily in his chair Morgan watched as Reid navigated the stairs with surprising agility and disappeared into Hotch's office.

'You could have given us a heads up.' Morgan said to Emily.

'What. I met the guy twice and both times he was sitting down. I had no idea.' Emily protested.

'Does it matter?' JJ said pointedly.

'Yes...no...it... Look, I'm sticking by what I said earlier. We need a Field Agent. A consultant doesn't have the training to go into the field whether he's able bodied or not, but it might have been nice to have someone with the potential to ...aagh. What the hell, we needed, _need,_ a field person.' Morgan said as he stood and grabbed his coffee mug.

'But it might have been nice to have someone who you could have nurtured into a field agent, right?' Emily questioned.

'No! That's not what... Look, it doesn't matter does it? We needed a qualified Agent. We got dumped with the kid up there. I'll deal, but it doesn't mean I have to like it, does it? Morgan said. 'I'm going to make coffee.'

* * *

'I thought that you might have warned them.' Reid said.

'Excuse me?' Hotch said as he sat behind his desk.

'The team, they seemed... surprised by me. I thought you might have given them some forewarning about... _this_.' Reid gestured with one of his canes.

'I didn't think that you needed to come with a warning Reid,' Hotch said dryly, 'any more than any other employee in this unit. When I hired Morgan I didn't feel the need to pre-advise his future colleagues that he was African American, nor did I pre-warn him when I hired our Media Liaison that she was female. Those things have no relevance. You were hired for the possession of a specific skill set that we require.'

'I admire the sentiment and it would be nice to hope that people see _me_ before they see my canes but the world doesn't really work like that does it?' Reid said.

Hotch stared at Reid for a moment. 'No. Unfortunately it doesn't, but labelling you before you even got here would be counter-productive.' Hotch was silent for a moment, appraising Reid as he fidgeted in front of him. 'I'm sure this isn't the first time you've encountered an awkward introduction.'

Reid smiled genuinely, the tension leaving his body. 'My whole life has been a series of awkward introductions, although, your Miss Garcia's might now be my all time number one.'

Hotch smiled. 'She's definitely different.' He said as he reached for his phone. 'I'll have Prentiss show you around and by the time she's done I'll have your first stack of consults lined up.'

* * *

Emily reminded herself to slow down as she walked along the corridor that led away from Garcia's office and toward JJ's.

'So, that was Garcia.' She said apologetically.

'Is she always ... Um... well, so ebullient?' Reid said as he caught up with her.

'Ha, that is a great choice of word for her, and yes, she is. It's kind of nice to experience though, a full on Garcia welcome.' She said.

'I think it's the first time anyone has referred to me as "kitten".' Reid said.

'Well, you might want to get used to it. She's gonna cycle through names until she settles on one that she think fits and then it's a done deal.' Emily laughed.

'Do you think I look like a young feline?' Reid asked seriously.

Emily stopped. 'Hard to say on day one, I may need the week to decide.'

Emily noted how Reid's brow crinkled at her answer. "_Okay, note to self, Dr Reid does not do teasing" _she thought.

'This is JJ's office.' Emily knocked and pushed the door open, holding it for Reid to move into the room. 'Hey JJ, I'm just giving Dr Reid here the tour.' Emily said.

JJ stood and hastily removed a stack of files cluttering the couch next to her desk. 'Sorry, please, would you like to sit down?' She asked.

'No, thanks, I'm good.' Reid replied.

JJ added the files to the stack littering her desk. 'As you can see, we have lots to do.' She said. 'I overview the files and then decide which go into consult and which need our physical presence. Are you sure you wouldn't like to sit?' She said.

'You do this alone?' Reid asked, ignoring her question.

'Ah ... mostly. When I have a core set I go through them with Hotch but nine times out of ten he goes the way my gut tells me.' JJ said.

'I could help you read through the backlog if you like. It would be best to segregate the oldest and I could get through the salient points in a day. If you want me to.' He finished hesitantly.

'I think a day might be pushing it, and in any case, Hotch has already asked me to set you up with your own stack already.' JJ smiled. 'They'll be on your desk within the half hour.'

Emily groaned. 'I still have four from Friday. Please tell me you don't have any for me?' She begged.

'Nice try. You have your own stack heading your way too.'

Emily sighed. 'Let's hit the break room Dr Reid. I think we might need coffee.'

* * *

Having run out of the usual tour spiel Emily walked with Reid in silence toward the break room. A part of her agreed with Morgan and wanted to rail at the stupidity of the department hiring a consultant over a field agent but there was _something_ about Dr Reid and Emily thought he might give a fresh perspective to the team and right now they really needed it. They'd all been feeling jaded since Breitkopf and it was starting to show in their work. Ideally they could use an extended vacation but that wasn't going to happen any time soon, so maybe Dr Reid could be their internal change of scenery? Scenery might not be the best choice of word though, she thought, as she looked at his wardrobe.

His style was an odd mix of ageing professor and accidentally cool. His charcoal grey corduroy pants were just that bit too short and his watch was tightly fastened over his shirt sleeve like a first grader, but the actual shirt, a white button down under a slim fitting charcoal waistcoat and the addition of the black Jack Purcell's was kind of cool, despite the mismatched socks. And the canes? Emily didn't know what to think about those.

'I'm glad you're finally here.' She said, breaking the silence. 'The team could use a new perspective and we've all been so swamped, well, let's just say it's a relief for us all.' She smiled as they reached the break room door.

* * *

The small room was already cramped with three or four agents from White Collar. Morgan was in the middle, his back to the door as he finished making a fresh pot of coffee. Emily flashed Reid an apologetic smile as they waited in the hallway.

'Anytime you're ready Morgan.' One of the other agents said, his voice carrying clearly out of the room.

'Yeah, yeah, it's coming, McManus. You know if your team actually refreshed the pot once in a while we wouldn't have a line forming every hour would we?

'Sure, 'cause you BAU guys are always making it. I'm amazed you know how to work the machine.' McManus laughed.

'We're busy, you know, that thing called work? Sorry man, I forgot, White Collar isn't all that happening is it.' Morgan teased.

'Right! I cleared four cold cases in the last two months and those things were Baltic man. They were sub-zero and just waiting for my exceptional powers of track and trace!' McManus bragged. 'And anyway, you got no excuses about being too busy now, huh? I hear you got a new recruit, right? A real special one, I heard.'

Morgan pulled the glass carafe from its stand, grabbed his mug and rolled his shoulders as the other White Collar agents joined in.

'I take it you'll still be the one kicking in the doors?' Another laughed.

'Hey, don't worry Morgan, hanging with this guy's gotta' come with perks right? I mean think about it, just make sure he always rides with you and you got the best parking slots at your disposal! Wherever you go you just slide right into that blue space.' McManus laughed as Morgan rolled his eyes.

Morgan snatched the sugar canister and tipped a shot into his coffee.

'Aww, come on Morgan, think of it as community service, helping the special kids out. "_Big bro Derek".'_

Morgan threw his stirrer into the trash and turned, muscled his way past McManus and his team straight into Emily and Reid.

The laughter in the break room petered out awkwardly as the White Collar guys slunk past Morgan and out of the door. Morgan closed his eyes briefly as his gaze met Reid's. He opened his mouth and closed it again.

Reid turned to Emily. 'I should really grab my flask. I left it on my desk.' He turned and started toward the bullpen.

'Reid, what those guys were saying ... I ...' Morgan started.

Reid stopped and turned slightly, his expression resigned. 'Qui tacet consentire videtur, Agent Morgan.' Turning back he carried on to his desk.

'Who's silent and what are they agreeing to?' Hotch's voice made both Morgan and Emily jump.

'What?' Morgan said.

Hotch gestured toward where Reid had been stood. ' "_Qui tacet consentire videture"_. He who is silent is taken to agree.' Hotch said.

Morgan closed his eyes and groaned.

**CMCM**


	4. Chapter 4

For disclaimer see Chapter One

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Four**

Spencer was angry with himself and hurling one of his canes down on the polished wood of his hallway floor as he entered his apartment hadn't made him feel any better.

The first four days at his new job had been some of the hardest he'd experienced in a long time. He had expected it to be difficult but not as difficult as it had been. The extended hours were fine. He was never one to stay in bed and had always been a night owl, burning the candle at both ends since he'd started college.

The logistics of getting to Quantico had been easier than he'd expected. He'd driven in once and had taken the subway the other three days, only having to negotiate the stairs one time when the elevator was being serviced but that hadn't been too demanding. He was fine with stairs as long as there weren't too many or too regular a feature in his route.

The work its self was fine. Yes, it was hard to see some of the crime scene photos but he'd already experienced that, courtesy of Gideon, and he found that when he needed to he could force himself to be emotionally detached to a certain extent.

The team as a whole were ok. He'd enjoyed seeing the puzzled look on Agent Jareau's face when he finished his first stack of consult notes within two hours and had also enjoyed a certain amount of smug satisfaction when Agent Morgan reluctantly commented on how quickly he was getting through his work. He hadn't answered Morgan. A part of him wanted to tell him all the things his brain could do but a larger part didn't want to give him any more ammunition against him and Spencer knew from experience that _anything_ out of the norm was ammunition to guys like Morgan. Besides, it was hard to answer someone when you weren't talking to them.

With only one cane he slowly limped his way into the kitchen, dropped his messenger bag on the counter top and grabbed the coffee canister from the fridge. He knew why it had been so hard. He couldn't stop thinking about what had happened in the break room on his first day and it was feeding his anger. Filling the machine with grounds he snapped the lid closed and tugged at his tie.

'Just get _over_ it already.' He muttered to himself.

He'd been the butt of other peoples jokes his whole life. When he was very small he hadn't always understood what some of the comments he overheard meant. He'd learned as he grew that it was because they were often sarcastic and Spencer didn't always get sarcasm. What he did get was casual cruelty and he'd gotten it so often that it stopped meaning anything to him. His pre-teen years held jibes about his genius and his teen years held jibes about his physical limitations _and_ his genius. It had got better as he got older but they'd been so commonplace in his early life he'd grown immune.

So what was different this time? It had taken him some time to figure it out. When he did, the realisation had made him angry at himself and, by extension, Morgan.

When the other Agents had started their jokes he'd almost rolled his eyes. He'd heard countless jibes about special parking spaces and disabled badges from the kids back home and the lack of originality took the sting out of their words until he looked up and caught Agent Prentiss's eye.

She blushed and her eyes widened. For a second he thought she was going to say something to him but instead she just shook her head a little, her lips parted as she floundered for something to say, and the colour deepened on her cheeks. His stomach curled when he realised that she felt _badly_ for him, _sorry for him_, and for the first time in years the comments cut.

That night when he was back in the security of his apartment, Spencer made himself an extra sweet coffee and a microwave bag of popcorn and took them to bed, flicking on his DVD player as he crawled beneath the comforter. Half way through Episode Six he realised why his stomach was still twisting. It was her, Agent Prentiss. She'd given him the tour and halfway through it he'd _relaxed_. She was so nice and welcoming, and she'd smiled that arresting smile at him again and he'd forgotten himself and had been so immersed in her company that even when she ran out of things to say he felt comfortable with the silence and he _liked_ it. He liked _her_ and there was the source of the hurt.

Even if she _had_ genuinely been enjoying his company Morgan and his friends had reminded everyone in hearing distance, _her_, of his physical shortcomings.

It stung. His own stupidity stung.

Since then things had been a little stilted between them. Often when he looked up from his paper work he caught her looking at him as if she wanted to say something but ultimately she would give a tight smile and look back to her own files. And now, four days in, it hadn't gotten any better.

The tension in his shoulders started to ease as the aroma of the brewing coffee spread through the small kitchen area. Grabbing his bag Spencer dug through it until he found the white envelope he'd addressed earlier. He propped it against the salt cellar and pulled his cell from his pocket. Hitting the speed dial he didn't have to wait too long for someone to pick up.

'Yes, this is Spencer Reid. Oh, hey Jackie, would it be possible to speak to my mother? ... Oh, I understand... I know, Dr Norman has already tried to persuade her ... well, it doesn't matter... Yes, I will...she can't stay mad at me forever can she? ... It really isn't that bad, it's just consultancy but she's not exactly a fan of the Government, as I'm sure you've noticed. I know, it really is alright. Goodnight.'

Spencer groaned and let his head fall into his hands.

* * *

'Spill.' Garcia demanded.

'Spill what?' Emily said as she sipped her cosmopolitan, eyes roaming the guys in the cocktail bar.

'What are we spilling?' JJ asked as she set her drink down.

'One of you had better be spilling something, and quick, or this Tech Goddess might spill your entire financial worlds down the cyber drain. You won't have the power to buy one of Manny's hotdogs let alone a pair of Manolo Blahniks so, spill.' Garcia snapped.

JJ looked puzzled. When had Garcia's offer of girly drinks after work turned into a re-enactment of the Inquisition?

'I want the skinny on delicious Dr Reid and why he and Morgan are colder than Chicago at this time of year.' Garcia said.

'Don't ask me. I noticed it too but I'm smart enough not to pry.' JJ said haughtily.

'I'm wounded.' Garcia gasped.

'Enough to back off?' JJ laughed.

'Not nearly. So, Emily the strange and brave, this leaves you in the hot seat as you spend all day sat with them in the tundra that is the bullpen.' Garcia turned to Emily.

'You're not going to like it, so don't ask.' Emily said.

'Oh, now you have to tell.' JJ said, leaning forward.

Emily sighed as she recounted what had happened with Morgan and Reid and the agents from White Collar. When she had finished JJ and Garcia were silent.

'I just felt so awful. He must think we're such a bunch of bigoted asses, poor guy. And now, I feel like I should say something about it but every time I try he has this _look_ and I just...I have no idea what to say to make it right.' Emily said.

'It's not you that needs to make it right Em.' JJ said.

'No, it isn't.' Garcia said.

Emily downed her drink and waved at the waitress for another. Sighing she resumed her perusing of the male contingent of the bar.

'Why is it that all the men in these places look the same?' She muttered.

* * *

Derek Morgan set the take out coffee cup on the as yet unoccupied desk next to his and dumped his own on his desk. He was first in the bullpen this morning, setting out purposefully early so that he could leave his liquid peace offering with minimum fuss.

He'd felt crappy all week. He hadn't hidden the fact that he thought hiring a consultant was a bad move but he would never intentionally hurt someone the way he'd allowed Reid to be hurt.

He knew he should have said something to McManus and the others but he hadn't and now it was too late, especially as Reid didn't seem overly eager to let him make amends.

He'd tried making conversation, comments about the cases, but the kid just ignored him or if he did reply it was with one word answers.

He'd even tried to compliment him on the speed at which he was clearing the files but Reid had just given him a look, as if he were trying to measure his sincerity. It seemed, for a moment, as if he was going to engage in conversation but then he had simply gone back to his work. Morgan couldn't really blame him. He didn't really want to speak to himself right now either. He was hoping the coffee would help. He wasn't holding his breath.

A flash of colour caught his eye.

'Good morning beautiful.' He said, smiling at Garcia.

Garcia stopped and turned to face him.

'Is it?' She said.

'Is it what?' Morgan replied, his brown crinkled in confusion. This wasn't the usual way his and Garcia's good morning banter went.

'Is it a good morning in the BAU for everyone Derek? Is it a good morning if you're, say, Dr Reid?' She glared.

Morgan shoulders slumped. 'Who told? Emily, right?'

'No one had to _tell_ Morgan, I could feel the frost all the way to my office. I just applied a little pressure and Emily fleshed out the sorry tale for me. Can you imagine how hard it is to try to fit into a new place when you're not ... No. Stupid question. You've never been the odd one out Morgan. No one teases guys like you.'

'Guys like me? Baby girl...' Morgan tried.

'No! I am not in a baby girl frame of mind right now Derek. What gets me the most, is not how hurt Reid must feel but that he must think you are such an _ass_ and that pains me, _it actually pains me_, that someone thinks that the most kind and genuinely caring person I know is less than he is.' Garcia turned and headed back to her office.

Morgan leaned back in his chair and sighed, his eyes closed until he heard the rhythmic light squeak of two rubber tipped canes.

Reid noticed the take out cup of coffee immediately and paused at his desk.

Morgan took a deep breath. 'It's coffee. I thought ... you know ... Um...it might be difficult for you to pick one up on the way in what with ...' Morgan gestured limply with his hand toward Reid, not knowing what to say.

'With what?' Reid asked, mirroring his gesture back at him. 'With my annoying physical defect that makes me unlike you and therefore unacceptable?' Reid said.

Morgan closed his eyes and sighed again. It suddenly felt as if all he had done for the past week was shove his foot in his mouth and then spent each day sighing around it.

The room was silent for a moment.

'I have this.' Reid finally said.

Morgan opened his eyes to see Reid dangling a small aluminium flask from a lanyard wrapped around his wrist.

'It has a fitted lid and an aperture that opens when you twist it. The barista at my local coffee shop knows to fill it half way.' He blinked at Morgan and then looked away.

Morgan watched as Reid balanced one of his canes against his desk and pulled his chair out. Sinking into the seat he took the take out cup and sniffed at the hole in the lid.

Morgan rolled his eyes. 'I didn't poison it.' He said.

Reid took a small sip. 'I didn't think that you did.' He was silent for a moment. 'It's not my usual but it is very sweet.' He took another, longer sip. 'It's better when it's sweet.' He said, absently pulling one of his unfinished files of the stack and flipping it open.

'You're welcome.' Morgan said, shaking his head.

* * *

Reid felt a little easier today. His anger had abated somewhat and whilst it was still there it wasn't as overwhelming. He'd thought long and hard about Agent Prentiss last night and had ordered himself to disregard what he could only describe as immature feelings of affection toward her. It was text book psychology, he knew that. She had been the first meaningful connection in a stressful new environment, not because of any desire on her part but because her superior had ordered her to spend time with him in familiarising him with the office layout. He had subcontiously given a deeper meaning to the relationship, most likely because of her gender and a males natural instinct to view a female as a nurturing and positive force. Because of that he had felt a connection that was not real. He also recognised that he was feeling the loss of Gideon, more keenly than he wanted to admit, another reason for him to project onto Agent Prentiss. He'd found himself reading Gideon's letter again last night, even though he hadn't needed to. He'd even brought it with him today, folded neatly in his pants pocket.

He felt calmer, relieved even, once he had attributed reason to the situation and the swelling tumult in his stomach had subsided. He could go back to behaving as he normally did, focusing solely on his new job and the current tasks at hand.

Spencer fingered the letter in his pocket as he waited for the coffee to brew. It was always the same in the break room. The pot was always empty.

'Empty again huh?' Emily said as she walked in to find Reid contemplating the pot.

Reid jumped slightly and flushed, the fizz in his stomach returning, much to his dismay.

'Yes. Again.' He mumbled.

Emily frowned and set her cup down.

'Look, I know things have been a little awkward since the thing with those other Agents and I wanted to just say, well, we're not all that ignorant.' Emily said hesitantly.

Reid felt himself flush and a small swirl of anger returned. 'I don't know what you mean.' He said, staring at her defiantly. When had he got so angry at _her_, he wondered.

Emily frowned. 'Those guys, and Morgan you know he didn't mean ...'

Reid shook his head tersely. 'I have no idea ...'

'Look, I didn't mean to ...' Emily started, wishing she had never brought it up.

'It's of no significance.' Reid said as he sloshed coffee into his flask and quickly pressed the lid on. Hastily reaching for where he'd leaned one of his canes Reid knocked the stick to the floor.

'Dammit.' He muttered.

'I'll get it for you.'' Emily said as she stepped forward to grab the cane from the floor.

'No. I can get it.' Reid leaned down at the same time only to soundly bump his head against Emily's as they both reached forward. 'Ow.' He yelped.

'Ah! Sorry, sorry I ...' Emily stood and passed the cane to Reid, his cool fingers brushing hers.

'I didn't need you to get it, I could have got it... and the other thing it ...' Reid floundered, rubbing his temple.

Emily held her hands up, her head throbbing. 'OK, I get it. You don't need help and what McManus and his guys said didn't hurt. I hear you loud and clear Dr Reid.' Emily quickly poured a fresh cup of coffee and left the room.

* * *

Emily scowled as she walked into the bullpen. She had only wanted him to feel better. She could see that his feelings had been hurt by McManus's comments and Morgan's lack of support and she just wanted to reach out.

_'You learned your lesson there Emily.'_ She thought wryly, vowing to leave Dr Reid well alone.

She set the coffee down just as JJ rushed past her waving a set of files.

'We have a case guys. Mass grave in Oregon.' She called as she hurried toward the round table room.

'Great.' Emily groaned as she rubbed her head.

**CMCM**


	5. Chapter 5

**For disclaimer see Chapter One. Some dialogue in this chapter taken from E03; Season 3; Scared to Death.**

**Many thanks for all reviews, alerts and favourites.**

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Five**

The jet levelled out and Reid settled further into the padded seat of the couch, grateful that no one else had opted to sit there first. The space meant he could stretch his legs out across the aisle in front of him and lay his canes along the rest of the couch next to him.

Prentiss sat next to the aisle in the block of four occupied by Hotch, Morgan and JJ. Reid tried to keep his focus on the file in his lap but his gaze kept settling back on Emily. He chewed his bottom lip and cringed as he thought about how rude he'd been back in the break room. He could almost hear his mother scolding him for being so impolite.

'Alright. Let review please.' Hotch said.

'We have four victims; one female and two male buried together in one grave and one female in a second grave.' JJ said.

Reid flipped through the file, reading through the Portland Field Office report, the MO's report and the LEO's notes. Lastly he laid the crime scene photographs out on the seat next to him, running his fingertips across the bottom of each picture before sweeping them back up in to the file and flipping it closed. He looked up when he noticed that JJ had stopped speaking.

'Did I miss something?' He asked, looking at Morgan who was staring at him, his eyebrows raised.

'My guess would be quite a lot kid. Look, you've been going through your files like that all week. You do know you have to read _all_ the content? The smallest of details, however insignificant, provide the foundations of a profile.' Morgan said.

Hotch looked up. 'He has the details Morgan.' He turned his attention to Reid. 'I take it you've been shy about advertising your talents?'

Reid flushed, quiet for a moment. 'You paraphrased Agent Morgan. The actual quotation is, "_The smallest of details, however much they appear insignificant, often provide the foundations of a profile_". It's from the book _"Manifestations and Motivations of a Fractured Mind"_ by noted psychologist Irvine Cantrell, more accurately it is from chapter one, page eighteen, paragraph four, line sixty four.'

Reid cleared his throat self consciously. 'I have the detail Morgan. I can read twenty thousand words per minute and I have an eidetic memory.'

'_Twenty thousand?_' Emily said.

'You got a photographic memory?' Morgan interrupted.

'Eidetic, not photographic. It's defined as the ability to recall images, sounds, or objects in memory with extreme precision and in abundant volume. The word _eidetic_ means related to extraordinarily detailed and vivid recall of visual images, and comes from the Greek word _eidos_, which is directly translatable to 'seen', as a past participle of 'see'. Reid gabbled, only stopping when he noticed the looks everyone apart from Hotch was giving him.

Clearing his throat again he continued. 'I can remember _everything_ I read.' He felt the warmth in his cheeks grow as the others stared at him.

'And it only takes you ten minutes to read _everything_?' Morgan said slowly.

Reid frowned a little. 'If it's two hundred thousand words, yes.'

* * *

The team had reviewed the case and had an hour or so before landing. Emily looked enviously at JJ who had managed to fall asleep and Morgan who had remembered to bring his i-Pod with him. She'd dug through her go bag and only when she'd managed to crumple up all her neatly folded clothes had she remembered that she had forgotten to bring a book with her. She'd finished re-reading Hocus Pocus on the last case and had forgotten to put a new book in her bag. Rolling her eyes she looked across at Hotch. He was diligently making notes on a stack of case files he'd brought with him and when he was in the zone there was no getting conversation out of him.

That left her with Dr Reid. Emily glanced at him surreptitiously. He was reading what looked like a large text book and was flipping the pages at great speed, clearly demonstrating his newly revealed ability to read at phenomenal speed. He cleared his throat and frowned a little, his finger pausing on the page. Emily looked away briefly until she heard the rhythmic flip of pages again. Sliding her eyes back to him again she saw that he was still frowning. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed his left leg jump a little and Reid shift in his seat.

Lousy with boredom and antsy over the new case, Emily stood and walked to the galley area at the back of the jet. Grabbing a mug she leaned against the counter and waited for the little red light to blink out on the coffee pot. Swinging the cup in her hand she glanced back at Reid. His leg was twitching again. Abruptly he let the book drop to his lap and he pressed the heel of his left hand hard into his thigh and rotated his foot. The discomfort on his face as he did so made Emily's breath hitch and she looked away.

The light flickered out signalling that the coffee was ready. Emily reached for the creamer and sugar and was just about to pour a cup when she heard Reid behind her.

'Is there enough for one more?' He asked, his voice squeaking slightly. 'I needed to stretch my legs and thought I'd establish the status of the pot.' He smiled briefly, twisting his canes into the pile of the carpet.

'It's a fresh one Genius Dr Reid. Plenty for all.' Emily said, her tone more clipped than she had meant it to be.

'I don't believe that measuring intelligence and labelling the findings is really an accurate ...' Reid tailed off as Emily raised her eyebrows.

'You read twenty thousand words per minute but you're _not_ a genius?' She said.

'No, well, yes, I have an IQ of 187 so ... Um ... that certifies me as a genius, but my ability to process information quickly doesn't.' Reid replied.

Emily shook her head in confusion. 'I think that is what is classified as splitting hairs doctor.

There was a moments silence as Reid continued to twist his canes, the rounded tops pushing into his palms. 'Would you mind um...? I can't carry a mug and I forgot my flask. I left it on my desk in all the... Ah... excitement just doesn't seem like an appropriate word... I... Just, my first actual case and ...'

'I got it.' Emily said as she reached for another mug. 'Creamer?'

Reid nodded.

'Sugar?' Emily asked her tone still a little hard.

'Four.' Reid said.

Emily's hand stilled as she pushed the spoon into the canister. 'And yet you still have your own teeth?' She said.

Reid looked puzzled. 'I started drinking it when I was nine and it was too bitter without.' He said.

'Your mom let you drink coffee at nine?' She said.

Reid scowled. 'It doesn't matter, I can do it.' He said.

Emily felt a surge of irritation at his sudden snappiness and set the mug down. 'Oh, no Dr Reid, we are not doing _this_ again. I don't know if it's me that brings it out in you or if you just have anger issues that manifest themselves in the vicinity of coffee pots but you can quiet down and accept my help with your coffee or you can stand _here_ and drink it. Your choice.'

'I ... Ah ...about that, earlier, I... Well, you know? And just now, it's just... Well, um... and thank you, for fixing the coffee.' Reid mumbled.

'Was that an apology?' Emily asked.

'Yes?' Reid said, avoiding Emily's gaze.

Emily was quiet for a moment. She wanted to stay mad but something about her new colleague made it impossible. She stirred his coffee and picked up both cups.

'Strange and inadequate apology accepted Dr Reid.' She said.

'Thank you.' Reid said quietly. 'I did hear you, in the break room, about the team not being ... well, like those other agents and I know I'm not what Morgan wanted but I can do this. I can help.' Reid said.

'I know.' Emily replied.

* * *

There hadn't been many hours left in the day once the team arrived at the Portland field office and they'd spent it going through Special Agent Calvert and his team's findings, with Reid and Emily setting up the victimology board and JJ sweet talking all the files out of the Portland Agents whilst Hotch and Morgan went to the fourth victim, Jenny Whitman's, apartment.

Emily watched as Reid conferred with Hotch on what he and Morgan found in Whitman's apartment, his teeth clamped around a red dry erase marker whilst he scrawled notes under Jenny Whitman's photograph with a blue one. He'd propped one cane against the board but the profiler in Emily noticed how his eyes kept darting back to it as if to reassure himself that it was still there. He could move around with one cane but he was noticeable slower than when he used both and his left foot dragged a little. _He's uncomfortable showing further weakness around us,_ Emily thought.

'He's good.' JJ said as she leaned back against the table next to Emily.

'He is.' Emily said straightening as Hotch turned from the board and demanded their attention.

'Alright. It's late. I suggest we head for the hotel and get some rest.

* * *

Reid was holding his breath. He felt a wave of unreasonable panic swell in his stomach and for a moment couldn't hear Hotch's voice. When the rushing in his ears abated and the sound came back Hotch and Morgan were looking at him expectantly.

'Sorry?' Reid said, clearly flustered.

'I asked if you would mind sharing with Morgan. Normally I wouldn't ask this early in the team relationship but I have some private calls that I have to make tonight.' Hotch said.

When the team had arrived at the hotel the manager could only find reservations for three rooms. He apologised for the mix up but he had nothing else to give them. When JJ and Emily grabbed their key card and headed up to the third floor Reid had been left with an embarrassed Morgan and an annoyed Hotch.

Reid tried to school his thoughts. It was a very long time since he had shared his living space with anyone. He knew he had some quirks and wasn't overly eager to share them with a relative stranger, but this was the job. The job he had wanted and he need to work to fit into the team.

'It's absolutely fine Hotch.' Reid said.

'Come on then kid. Fourth floor and I'm beat. Let's take the elevator.' Morgan said.

'I'm on two. Goodnight.' Hotch said and headed for the stairs.

* * *

Reid's back connected sharply with the metal hand rail as the elevator bumped to a halt.

'Why isn't it moving?' Morgan said.

'I don't know. Don't do that, stop it!' Reid said as Morgan bounced on his heels, rocking the car.

'What? It's broken.' Morgan said, jumping again.

'Don't do that!'

'Why not?' Morgan asked.

'Because there are six elevator related deaths per year not to mention ten thousand injuries that require hospitalisation. Chill out.' Reid snapped.

'Are you scared? You're scared.' Morgan laughed.

'I'm not scared. I don't want to be stuck in an elevator with you, to be honest.' Reid said.

'What if I push that?' Morgan pushed and pulled at the emergency button, laughing until the elevator groaned and dropped again. 'Whoa! Oh no, not today. Not today.' Morgan gasped as he clung to the rail, his eyes screwed shut. All he could hear was the alarm bell and Reid's rapid breathing.

As abruptly as it had shuddered to a standstill the elevator suddenly lurched back into life and resumed its journey. As Morgan stepped out of the elevator car on the fourth floor he looked back at a slightly dishevelled Reid.

'I think I could use a drink.' Morgan said, passing his hand over his scalp.

* * *

Emily spread the case file out on the comforter and reviewed the field office notes.

'I just don't get the variance in MO. Has this guy just not found his thing yet? That has to be it. They find a signature and the cling to it, that's where they derive their satisfaction, the repetition of a specific act.' Emily called to JJ.

JJ walked back the bedroom, towelling her damp hair. 'I think I'll stick to reigning in the press.' She laughed.

Emily smiled back. 'I wouldn't trade. Give me psychopaths and sociopaths any day.'

JJ sat cross legged on her bed. 'What time are we hooking up with PG?'

'She said she'd log on as soon as she reached home. Oh, Speak of the goddess.' Emily said as the laptop pinged at the end of the bed.

Emily leaned forward and swiped at the thumb pad. The screen burst into life and Emily clicked the messenger link. Garcia's smile filled the screen.

'Hello ladies. An exciting night I see. PJ's already?' Garcia said.

'You can talk. You're in yours.' Emily said.

'I just sent Kevin to the store for a tub of Phish Food and we all know that you can only eat Ben and Jerry's in your PJ's. It doesn't taste right otherwise.' Garcia said. 'So, anything exciting happen?'

'We haven't caught him yet.' Emily said.

Garcia rolled her eyes. 'I don't care about that ... wait, I do care obviously, but I meant _interesting _stuff like how is the new boy doing, has he forgiven Morgan yet and has he made blushing Emily throw him _The Look_ again?' Garcia teased.

'Augh, enough with _The Look_. The only look I've given him recently is one of irritation. He is _very_ touchy.' Emily said.

'Really? He's been fine with me and I can't say I've noticed him being touchy with Hotch.' JJ said.

'No one in their right mind would be touchy with Hotch.' Emily said.

'Maybe he hasn't really been touchy with you Em, maybe you are hyperaware of him. Happens with married couples you know. They're attuned to pick up on each other's unvoiced emotions because they are so deeply connected.' Garcia said sagely.

'PG! Firstly, Reid and I are not a married couple. I have known him for precisely one week, ONE week PG, and secondly, how many Harlequin novels have you been reading in that bunker of yours?' Emily snapped.

Garcia laughed. 'OK, I'm just starved of anything exciting during the work day, to the point that I am happy to make things up to keep me going.'

'Seriously though, he _is_ very good at the job.' JJ said.

'So he'll take some of the pressure of you guys?' Garcia said.

'Hey, what's all this about?' Emily asked at Garcia's worried expression.

'I just, I worry about my babies. I worry that you all are so stretched and over worked that you'll get sloppy and sloppy can get dangerous and scary and _UnSubby. _I need our newbie to be the one who stays this time, I can't see you all back at square one again like you were after Elle, I can't.' Garcia's face was flushed and she looked away from the camera.

'Hey, Garcia, look at me.' Emily said. 'He's good, he really is.'

Garcia shot JJ and Emily a watery smile. 'Has Morgan apologised yet?' She said.

'I wouldn't hold out too much hope of Reid accepting if he does.' Emily said. 'He seems the stubborn type.'

'I can't say I really blame him.' JJ said. 'I can't imagine what it must be like to have something that singles you out as different and to have to get people to see past that before you can even start to try to fit in.' She said.

All three women were quiet for a moment.

'I wonder what happened to him?' Garcia said.

* * *

Reid leaned forward and allowed the strap of his go bag to slide from his shoulder leaving the bag to bounce on the bed. Exhausted he sank into one of the winged chairs at the table near the mini-bar.

Morgan sat opposite and handed him a glass.

'Which one.' He said as he waved two miniatures toward Reid.

'Should you drink during a case?' Reid said haughtily.

'Which one, the emphasis being on _one_, Doctor Reid.' Morgan said.

Reid's shoulders relaxed a little. 'The Vodka, please.'

'Good choice.' Morgan handed over the bottle and then twisted open the top of his whiskey and filled his glass. 'I can count on one hand the times I've drunk on a case and still have enough fingers left to count your PHD's'

'You know about my PHD's?' Red said.

'Prentiss might have mentioned it.' Morgan said as he took a draw from the glass.

Reid was silent.

'You don't like advertising it?' Morgan said.

'I'm never sure how people will react. I find that feelings of resentment and insecurity are frequent responses.' Reid said carefully as the silence settled around them.

'I'm sorry I was an ass.' Morgan said eventually. 'It's no secret that I think the team needs a field agent but I shouldn't have let those guys talk about you like that, I should have defended you.'

Reid's brow creased. 'You don't know me. Why would you have defended me?'

'Because it's what a team does.' Morgan said simply, setting his glass down and extending his hand toward Reid. 'Maybe we could start over? Hi, names Derek Morgan. Welcome to the team.'

Reid looked a little uncertain before raising his hand in an awkward wave. 'Dr Spencer Reid. Thanks.'

Morgan let his hand drop and shook his head, laughing. 'I got dibs on first shower.' He said as he stood and grabbed his go bag.

'Oh, that's ok. I think I'll wait until morning.' Reid said.

'You'll regret it if we get called in at four AM.' Morgan relied.

Reid shrugged. 'Too tired.'

Morgan sifted through his go bag before pulling out a wash bag.

'Ah, Morgan?' Reid said as Morgan headed for the bathroom.

'Yeah?'

'Do you need all your pillows?' Reid nodded toward Morgan's bed.

'Just two.' Morgan replied.

'Thanks.' Reid said as he sat on Morgan's bed and grabbed the two spares, tossing them onto his own bed.

'You're welcome kid.'

* * *

Morgan felt his muscles begin to relax for the first time in days as the hot water washed over him. It felt good to clear the air with Reid even if it meant that they had to share a room. Morgan hated it when they had to double up and from the way Reid tensed when Hotch asked him to share Morgan guessed he wasn't keen on it either.

Morgan slipped his sleep pants and T shirt on and stepped back into the main room. Reid was seated on the edge of his bed. He had dressed in flannel Pyjama pants and a t-shirt was laid out on the bed next to him, his dress shirt in a ball behind him. He was struggling to remove a rigid looking lumbar support from around his lower back and jumped as Morgan entered the room. Flushing he reached for the t-shirt, pulled it on and continued to fumble beneath the shirt with the taught Velcro fastenings of the support.

Morgan could feel the kid's discomfort. Grabbing for the remote he flicked the cable on, letting the low murmur fill the room. Settling into bed Morgan watched as Reid carefully folded back his comforter and positioned himself, flat on his back, on the carefully constructed range of pillows.

'Those things are a pain, huh?' Morgan said after a while.

Reid stopped staring at the ceiling and looked at Morgan. 'What are?'

'Sports injury supports. I had one when I blew my knee out. Wore it for nine months, annoying as hell but they really do help.' Morgan said.

Reid stared at him for a moment before flashing a small, brief smile.

* * *

_The library was warm. Spencer pushed his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. They kept slipping down, distracting him from the book on particle physics that Ms Klein had ordered especially for him. As he drew his finger down the page he swung his legs, dragging the toes of his sneakers across the worn parquet flooring. His toes made little squeaks against the varnished wood._

_Someone, a girl, stood in his light, making the page too dark to read. She leaned over the table, the sun catching in her long, blonde hair, the dust motes making it sparkle. She held out her hand, smiled at him, the corner of her moist, pink mouth quirking._

'_Come on Spencer. Alexa's waiting.'_

Reid jerked awake, his heart racing. The hotel room was dark and peaceful, the only noise Morgan's rhythmic breathing. Carefully Reid slowed his gasping breaths. Pushing his damp hair out of his face he lay back against the bank of pillows, his back aching.

**CMCM**


	6. Chapter 6

For disclaimer see Chapter One

All reviews, alerts and favourites are truly valued.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Six**

Reid woke early. He always did, even in his own apartment and more so in a strange bed and with an unaccustomed roommate. Taking a deep breath he rolled onto his side and pushed himself upright. His back grumbled in protest.

Morgan was still asleep. Reid grabbed one of his canes and his wash bag and moved awkwardly to the bathroom. His left leg was still asleep and if the twinges on the jet the day before were anything to go by it wouldn't fully wake up all day. Reid sighed as he turned on the shower. He'd have to find the time for a massage when they got back to DC or maybe some acupuncture.

As he stripped of his t shirt and sleep pants Reid contemplated the shower. He would have welcomed the hot water washing over him last night but he really was too tired to take a standing shower and unfortunately, whilst the shower did have a hand rail, it didn't have a fold down seat like the one in his apartment. If he hadn't been sharing a room he might have called down to reception to see if they had a plastic stool but he really, _really_ didn't want to do that in front of Morgan. Even if things were a little easier between them Reid wasn't fully relaxed around him to the extent that he would feel comfortable advertising his physical shortcomings in such intimate detail. There was no one he trusted enough for that. He doubted there ever would be.

By the time Reid was done and out of the bathroom Morgan was up and on his cell phone. The conversation ended abruptly and as he snapped the cell shut he headed quickly toward the bathroom.

'That was Hotch. We got another body, a drowning.' Morgan called as he closed the door behind him.

Reid sat at the small table and flipped through the case file again. The pictures flew before his eyes as he started mentally skimming through each of the victims and the causes of death.

'Hanging, asphyxiation, drowning..._, the elevator_.' Reid rubbed his leg and stood up. His mind flew as page after page of text ran through it. 'They're anxiety disorders, phobias.' He muttered to himself.

'Morgan!' Reid moved to the bathroom door and rapped on it with the top of his cane. 'Morgan. There's a connection, I have a connection.'

Morgan opened the door, pulling his shirt over his head. 'What?'

'Your freak out, in the lift, last night.' Reid said excitedly.

'_My_ freak out, _I _was the one freaking out?' Morgan questioned.

'That's not important, the elevator and the boxes in Jenny Whitman's shower stall, they're phobias, the five sub-types of phobia, as defined by the Diagnostics and Statistics Manual. The UnSub is creating situations in which his victims fall foul of their greatest fears. It's _all_ about fear.' Reid gabbled. 'Think about it, Jenny Whitman was claustrophobic. She suffocated to death. If we look at the other victims we'll find similar phobias; drowning, being burned, being buried, those types of things. The phobia is the UnSubs weapon.

Morgan studied Reid for a second before grabbing his cell phone. 'Hotch. Reid has something.'

**

* * *

**

The team were tired but on a high as they entered the bullpen. The case had been a win for them. They'd traced the UnSub, psychiatrist Dr Stanley Howard, to the bogus Goodman Institute. They'd found his office, his journals and finally the doctor himself. There was no time to stop him from committing suicide but there had been time for Hotch and Morgan to pull his last victim alive from her grave in the basement of the abandoned building Howard had used to front his practice.

Reid recognised that finding someone alive didn't happen too often and he could see the positive effect it had on the team. Morgan and JJ had joked around on the jet and Morgan had headed straight for Garcia's high five when they pushed through the glass doors of the BAU. Even Hotch's demeanour seemed a little lighter, not too much, he was still as brooding as ever but his eyes seemed a little less clouded.

Out of all the team Reid found Emily to be the most transformed. She was laughing at Morgan and Garcia's banter, her usual "all business" composure melted away and Reid caught himself watching her and smiling also. He couldn't help but think how much her smile, when it reached her eyes, warmed her whole face.

He settled himself into his chair as he watched the three members of the BAU head for the coffee pot, their laughter still filling the early evening lull of the office. He was still smiling when the sound of Emily's voice made him jump and fumble the files he'd been sorting.

'What's amusing you Dr Reid?' Emily said.

'What? Oh, nothing, I was just thinking how different the team is when they're directly involved in saving a life, as opposed to the daily consults, you know, where you're just dealing with post mortem victims. It's good to see you all that way.' Reid said.

'Us.' Emily said.

'Excuse me?' Reid said, confused.

'Us. You said "It's good to see _you_ all that way". It's good to see _us_ that way doctor. _You're_ part of the team you know, newbie or not.' Emily said firmly.

Reid flushed and fixed his attention on the files. 'Any established social dynamic, established in terms of longevity, naturally resists the inclusion of a new subject, often to the physical detriment of that subject. Nature clearly demonstrates the benefit of a slow introduction to an established pack. Based on that observation I feel it unwise to assume a ...' Reid stopped as Emily held up her hand.

'I'm going to resist the temptation to point out that we are not wolves or chimpanzees and just invite you for a drink. We're all going to Carlucci's for cocktails and by we, I mean the _team_, _us_, including _you_.' Emily said.

Reid hesitated, his mind quickly sifting through all the information he had about the bars in DC and settling on Carlucci's. It felt good to be invited, he couldn't remember the last time someone had included him in a social activity, but he knew that particular bar wasn't really an option.

'Thank you, but I... maybe some other time.' Reid said.

Emily sighed. 'OK, but these evenings don't happen that often Dr Reid, we don't win that often.'

Reid's eyes flickered up to meet hers briefly. 'I know.' He said softly.

* * *

Emily looked back to where Reid was gathering his things. She watched him as he leaned his canes against his chair and rested his weight on his desk as he deftly buckled his messenger bag shut with one hand. She could hear JJ laughing as Garcia teased Morgan.

'So my beautiful behavioural analyst, are you going to take a swan dive up the stairs at Carlucci's like you did last time, when you'd only "_had one drink mama, I swear_". Garcia imitated Morgan's smooth voice and JJ snorted.

'There are thirty steps down to that bar and they are lethal, going down _and_ up.' Morgan said, laughing indignantly.

Emily watched Reid as he picked up his coat. He swayed a little as he shouldered it on, bracing his right thigh against his desk and grabbing for one of his canes as soon as one arm was through a sleeve. She noticed how white his knuckles were, a testament to how much of his weight he was putting on the single stick whilst he wrestled his other arm into his dark blue pea coat.

'Guys.' Emily said over her shoulder. 'I feel like Art's Bar. Let's go there for a change, ok?' She said as she walked back into the bullpen and toward Reid's desk.

'Change of plan. Morgan hates Carlucci's so we're going to Art's Bar instead. Sure you won't change your mind?' Emily asked Reid.

Reid buttoned his coat. _Art's Bar, off Third and Rosemont, entrance straight off the sidewalk with two steps up and none inside. _He catalogued the new venue as he picked up his messenger bag.

Emily raised her eyebrows at him, the silence carrying on for a moment.

Reid finally looked up at her and blinked. 'I think I will. Thanks.' He said.

**

* * *

**

The bar was lively but not too crowded. The team had taken possession of one of the booths at the back and Morgan and Hotch had returned from the bar with a tray of drinks. Morgan rolled his eyes as he passed Garcia an elaborate looking cocktail.

'Girl, that is the last time I order a '_Long, Sticky Kiss_' for you. The barman didn't find it as amusing as you do.' Morgan said, shaking his head.

Garcia simply laughed and clapped her hands. 'It has nothing to do with the name my darling, I happen to like the drink.' She said.

'Of course.' Morgan said.

'Oh stop being a baby, Kevin will be here in a half hour and he's man enough to order me anything I ask for.' She said.

'And that has nothing to do with the fact that you have him wrapped around your finger so tight that he'd jump in front of a bullet for you.' Morgan said, laughing.

'He's coming? I thought he had that role playing group thing every Friday?' Emily said.

'He does. He cancelled when I called.' Garcia said sweetly.

'How is it that you have this guy obeying your every command Garcia?' Emily asked.

'I would love to know your secret.' JJ joined in. 'He sure does toe the line.'

'Ah, I cannot tell I'm afraid. Let's just say that there are very good reasons why that boy does as he's told, _very_ good reasons.' Garcia popped the pink straw in her mouth and sucked sweetly.

'On that note I am going to get my _groove thang_ on.' Morgan stood and headed for the dance floor. JJ beamed, took a slug of her beer and headed after him, pulling Garcia and her cocktail with her.

* * *

Hotch smiled and downed the last half of his beer. 'That's it for me. I need to get back for Jack.' He pulled out his wallet and dropped a roll of twenties on the table. 'Get a few rounds in and make sure everyone relaxes; Monday will be here soon enough.' He said to Emily as he stepped around the table and snatched up his jacket. 'Have a good weekend, both of you.'

Emily watched Hotch as he left. When she turned back to the table Reid had his messenger bag in front of him and was tucking a letter into the pocket. Emily couldn't help but notice that he looked distracted.

'You ok?' She said.

'What?' Reid looked up, shoving his hair out of his eyes.

'You looked preoccupied.' Emily nodded to the bag.

Reid frowned a little and shifted in his seat. 'Not at all, I just ... I was just thinking that this wasn't how I expected to spend the first night after my first case.' He said, his voice wavering slightly. He pulled the letter back out of his bag.

'Gideon?' Emily said.

'I expected that I'd be spending time going over the case with _him_, you know.' He said quietly.

'You were close to him.' Emily stated.

Reid nodded. 'I don't have ... Um... I lost contact with my own father when I was ten and when I met Gideon it was like having a little of that relationship back. He filled a void for me and at the same time he'd lost contact with his own son and I suppose I filled a void for him.' Reid cleared his throat and took a swig of the warm beer Morgan had set before him. 'Did you know that some of humanity's earliest known writings refer to the production and distribution of beer: the Code of Hammurabi included laws regulating beer and beer parlours, and "The Hymn to Ninkasi", a prayer to the Mesopotamian goddess of beer, served as both a prayer and as a method of remembering the recipe for beer in a culture with few literate people.' He rambled.

Emily ignored the blatant change of subject. Leaning across the table she placed her hand on the letter. 'Did he say if he was coming back?' She asked gently.

'No. I don't think I fill the void for him anymore; why would he come back to me?' Reid took another swig of beer and tried to ignore the scent of Emily's hair as she leaned across the table and the sinking feeling his stomach gave as he thought about his surrogate father.

'You and I could always talk cases through, if you want to.' Emily said.

Reid smiled briefly. 'Thank you.'

They both took a drink and Emily gazed out to the dance floor where Morgan was surrounded by a group of ladies and JJ and Garcia were dancing together.

'Less than ten minutes and he's surrounded.' Emily said, laughing.

Reid followed her gaze. He watched as Morgan wove himself between the women, his athletic body fluid with the music, his arms raised above his head. Reid couldn't help but wonder what it felt like. He'd always felt at odds with his own body, even before his accident. He'd been a clumsy child with thick glasses and too small for his age, until he'd shot up in his early teens but by then he'd been in a wheelchair and now he didn't know if he would have ever been graceful or not. Clearing his throat he turned back to Emily.

'So how long have you been part of the team? He asked.

'About three years. I joined right after the Bale case.' She said.

Reid opened his mouth to ask another question but was cut off.

'My turn doctor.' Emily said. 'So, what does a genius do in his spare time?'

'I usually spend it catching up on my dissertation work. I'm part way through my BA in Sociology.' He said.

Emily pulled a face. 'I'm going to classify that as work. What do you do for fun?'

Reid looked uncomfortable. 'Nothing that I think you'd be interested in.'

'Try me.' She challenged.

Reid sighed. 'I like science fiction, you know, Star Trek and Star Wars. I like Asimov and I like the Smithsonian. They have good visiting exhibits. And I have membership.' He finished lamely.

'That's more like it.' Emily smiled. 'I'm a little ashamed to say that I've never been to the Smithsonian.' She said.

Reid blinked. 'But you live in DC.' He said.

'True, but they don't make you visit the Smithsonian before they let you move into the area.' She teased.

'I don't understand.' Reid said. 'Why would you not have been?'

'I don't know. I just never have.' Emily said.

'I could take you.' Reid said, blurting the words before he could stop himself. He felt the heat rise in his face and he looked away from Emily's face. 'I mean, if you wanted to, I can get you into the national archives. The general public aren't allowed in there.' He said.

Emily jumped as two bottles of beer were placed onto the table in front of her.

'For you Agent Prentiss and Dr Reid at the request of my goddess on the dance floor. Dr Reid I presume?' Kevin wiped his palm on his shirt and extended his hand toward Reid. Reid awkwardly waved back in response.

'Hey, Kevin. I didn't see you arrive.' Emily said.

'I wasn't supposed to be here at all. I'm trying to get to level five warlock and this will seriously set me back in the game, but when Garcia calls.' Kevin drifted off, staring at Garcia as she swung JJ around the floor.

'Reid, this is Kevin Lynch. He's a technical analyst at the bureau and he's Garcia's boyfriend.' Emily said as Reid waved again and Kevin smiled, disappearing into the throng of dancers.

Reid pulled the fresh bottle toward him and contemplated drinking it. He didn't usually drink more than one in case he needed to take painkillers but something about sitting with Emily, the slight beer buzz, the alien feeling of socializing with _friends_ made him relax and take another drink.

Emily was swaying to the music and drinking from the bottle Kevin had brought, her hair shone under the warm lights of the bar and Reid felt his mouth dry. He was still staring at her when she looked at him.

'What?' She said.

'Did you know that as far back as ancient Egypt saw hair dyes being made? The Egyptians would use recipes involving lead oxides and calcium hydroxide to administer to fair locks in order to darken it.' Reid said.

'Are you implying that my hair is dyed?' Emily said, setting her drink on the table, her hand brushing over her roots. 'I'm not that old.' She snapped.

'No! That's not what ... I just ...your hair is very black, that's all. I didn't ... The ancient Egyptians and the Romans also, coveted intensely black hair, they thought it to be the most beautiful colour and it became a symbol of social status, and of great beauty and you... Your hair made me think of that. That's all I meant.' He flushed and fidgeted.

'Oh.' Said Emily.

**

* * *

**

When the inevitable happened and one of the men in the bar asked Emily to dance, Reid found himself sitting alone. He watched as Emily moved on the dance floor. She kept her distance from her partner but her body language was open and Reid could tell that she was enjoying herself. She wasn't fluid like Morgan, but more sensual and Reid wondered what it would feel like to dance with her, to rest his head on her shoulder and breath in the scent of her hair, feel it sweep across his cheek, feel her hands on his back.

Closing his eyes he took another swallow of beer and mentally berated himself. Why was he doing this? It was the mental equivalent of testing a sore tooth with his tongue. Why did his mind insist on filling his head with thoughts that would never come to reality? He opened his eyes in time to see Emily's dance partner dip her skilfully, her hair skimming the floor.

'Hey!' Garcia flopped into the chair next to Reid and smiled at him, her eyes narrowing slightly as she noticed he was frowning. She followed his eyes. 'Huh.' She said as she took Reid's hand in her own, making him jump.

'Garcia. I thought you were dancing.' He said, his voice squeaking.

'And I thought you were talking to Emily and Hotch, not sitting here all on your lonesome.' She replied.

'I'm fine, really. Hotch had to get back to Jack and I think Emily was happy to be asked to dance.' He said smiling. 'I really don't mind.'

'Well I do junior genius.' Garcia said as Reid's eyes flickered back to the dance floor.

'Huh.' She said again.

'What?' Reid replied absently.

'Nothing, nothing at all sweetie.' Garcia squeezed Reid's hand. 'Just a look I noticed. It seems to be going around.' She said to herself as she watched Emily twirl.

**CMCM**


	7. Chapter 7

For disclaimer; See Chapter One

Thank you for all your encouragement.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Seven**

Reid straightened the pile of manila files on his desk so that they were at an exact right angle with the corner. He then pressed the flat of his palm along the spines so that they made a perfect, regimented stack. Clearing his throat he opened the fresh file he'd placed in front of him and smoothed the upper most sheet under his hand. Running his index finger down the page he read the preliminary notes, flipping the sheet when he reached the foot of the page and starting over with the next. Within less than a minute he had read the file, flipped it closed and was reaching for his writing tablet and pen. His pens were to the right of the tablet, three of them, blue, red and black all neatly rowed, their tops in perfect alignment. He lay his hand over them and then pulled it back, tucking an errant strand of hair behind his ear before placing his hand over the pens once more, only to repeat the series of motions for a third time.

Suddenly he sagged back into his chair and pulled his glasses off. Dropping them on the top of the files he rubbed at his eyes, blinking furiously. Taking a deep breath he tried to relax himself. "_Stop_." He told himself, as he fought the urge to straighten the pens again. "_You will NOT straighten them again. You are just anxious and that anxiety in manifesting its self into unnecessary checking." _ Angrily he reached forward and grabbed the pens, dumping them sloppily into the pen tidy. The red one missed the pot and rolled onto the floor.

**

* * *

**

'Does he look as though he's calmed down at all?' Emily asked.

Morgan was peering around the break room door, trying to watch Reid without being noticed.

'I'm thinking the only way to calm him down right now would be a tranquilizer dart.' Morgan said as he stirred his coffee.

'Has he at least taken his coat off?' Emily said.

'Nope.' Morgan replied. 'And the trusty messenger bag is still in situ. He's let go of the canes though.'

'Do you think the presentation was really as bad as he described?' Emily said, grimacing as she took a mouthful of her own drink.

'Well, he does have the habit of painting every situation he is central to as a disaster and he wouldn't recognise his own successes as such if they slapped him in the face, so we could assume that he's catastrophising, _but_, we've both seen him when he first meets people, he does start out nervous, which often translates as pompous, and he can be hard to warm to. He gets better with time, as he relaxes, but that's usually over a couple of days. Strauss's little gathering was a two hour job tops.' Morgan said.

'Is she still in with Hotch?' Emily asked.

Morgan leaned further out of the doorway. 'Yup.' He said.

'Can you see blood spatter across the window?' Emily asked.

'Not yet.' Morgan laughed. 'Kid's straightening his files again. We gotta' get him to relax or he's gonna' implode.'

'How about I do a coffee run and take him with me?' Emily said as she swilled the remains of her mug down the sink.

'Incoming.' Morgan said as he stepped back into the room and JJ stepped in.

'Why are you two lurking in here?' She said.

'Same reason you pretend we don't know about your secret New Orleans boyfriend; we're trying to keep something on the down low.' Morgan said.

'I have no idea what you're talking about.' JJ replied smoothly. 'Now, what are you doing?'

'Apparently Reid didn't go over too well at Strauss's Congressman's Lunch.' Emily said. 'She's in with Hotch now and Reid looks as if he's about to pass out. We can't take sitting near him anymore.'

'He's making me sweat more that Bomb Disposal.' Morgan said.

'Have you tried _talking_ to him?' JJ asked.

'He doesn't appear to be able to hear us.' Emily said, pouring JJ a cup of coffee.

JJ rubbed her neck uncomfortably. 'Apparently he told Congressman Lambert that his views on the treatment of Dissociative Identity Disorder within the Federal Penitentiary System were _pedestrian_. Understandably the Congressman didn't take to kindly to it and even less kindly to the fact that Reid didn't seem to notice that he was offended.' JJ said.

Morgan stifled a laugh.

'It's not funny Morgan; at least Reid doesn't think it is. Look at him, he's genuinely worried.' JJ said.

'That's why it's time for good coffee.'' Emily said as she pushed past Morgan and out of the door.

**

* * *

**

'I'm unsure of what resolution you want me to reach Erin.' Hotch said, his gaze unwavering.

Erin Strauss narrowed her blue eyes and matched Hotch's steely gaze. She wasn't a profiler but she was sure she was being mocked. She just wasn't sure by whom, a very present Aaron Hotchner or the AWOL Jason Gideon.

'Were you aware that Jason and I had numerous talks about Dr Reid fulfilling certain roles that I had a direct and invested interest in?' She said.

'Other than his specified tasks within his team, I was not.' Hotch said.

'Jason _never_ spoke to you about Dr Reid being involved in the promotional side of the bureau?' She said, her brows raised.

'If he had I might have advised against it.' Hotch said carefully.

'You might?' Strauss replied.

'I might. I wouldn't describe Dr Reid as the most confident or the most aware in social settings.' Hotch said.

'Apparently Jason didn't feel the need to point that out to me.' Strauss said.

'You should take this up with Jason.' Hotch replied.

Strauss gritted her teeth, her eyes still locked with Hotch's. The bastard knew she couldn't reach Jason Gideon. No one could. He also knew that now Dr Reid had a position within the team she couldn't justify ousting him just because he was a social disaster.

Strauss blinked. 'I think there are a lot of people who'd like to take things up with Jason Gideon.' She said.

Hotch set his pen down carefully. 'Erin, I know Dr Reid didn't perform as you had hoped but he _is_ a remarkable asset to this team. Jason _was_ right about that.' Hotch said.

Strauss glared as she rose from the chair opposite Hotch's desk. 'His probationary two months are nearly up. Are you _sure_ he's a good fit for your team Aaron?'

'Absolutely.' Hotch replied. 'I'm convinced he has more to offer, which is why I requested your sign off on his accompanying members of the team on custodial interviews.'

Strauss paused and after a moment nodded. 'It's not classed as field work. Make the necessary insurance arrangements with HR.'

'Thank you.' Hotch replied.

'Oh and Aaron.' Strauss stopped as she put her hand on the door handle.

'Yes?' Hotch said.

'Let's hope he connects better with convicts than congressmen.' She said.

**

* * *

**

Reid glanced up at Hotch's office. Strauss was still in there, most likely ordering Hotch to fire him. His stomach curled. He couldn't believe he'd taken Strauss's intentions for his role so lightly. It was so out of character for him not to have examined something from all angles, to have projected the potential scenarios and their consequences. He knew Jason didn't place any importance on Strauss's reasons for hiring him but that was no excuse. He himself should have attached more importance to it. He should have ensured that Jason was explicit in advertising his shortcomings, although he had no doubt that Strauss would never have hired him if she'd been aware just how disastrous he could be in the wrong setting.

Reid took a calming breath and closed his eyes. For the first time in his life he felt sorrow at the thought of leaving people behind. He'd never had many friends but for the past couple of months at the BAU he'd started to get a taste of what friendship was like. Yes, he still kept his distance and had to be drawn into most non work related conversations but recently he'd found himself tentatively joining in and was heartened when his colleagues didn't always shut him down.

Recently he'd found himself thinking that he might have just found the place where he fit and now he almost had it he didn't want to leave.

'Hey.' Emily said

'Oh, hey.' Reid replied as he dragged his eyes away from Hotch's office door to Emily.

Emily snagged a post-it pad from her desk and hastily scribbled on it.

'Take a look at that for me.' She tossed the yellow block onto Reid's desk and grabbed her purse.

Reid's brow crinkled in confusion. 'What is this?' He said.

'Have you read it?' She asked.

'Yes.' He replied.

'Good. I'm going on a hunt for decent coffee and you can remember the orders. Come on.' She said.

**

* * *

**

Reid sat in the SUV staring absently at the shop fronts as they flew by. They had passed two coffee houses already but Emily insisted she knew a better one that made the greatest espresso in the whole state. Reid had replied that he'd take her word for it. He had only tried espresso once and he could still feel it on his tongue the day after.

After that one comment they had fallen silent. Out of all the team Reid found Hotch and Emily the hardest to read. Reid recognised that with Hotch it was because his guard was up. He was their leader and as such he rarely had the time for indulging in general conversation with the team. He kept himself one step removed so he could fulfil his role to the letter.

Emily was different. She was quite open, unless focused on a case, but she still confused him. He found that he swung wildly between being completely at ease with her to feeling overwhelmingly tense. Increasingly he found himself hyperaware of each and every move he made and word he uttered when she was near him, to the point that he mostly found himself mute when she was close. Sometimes though, when she instigated one on one conversation about some of the films she enjoyed, the books she liked, and he found that they were to his taste also, he found himself falling into one of his long, flowing rambles. Thinking about the instances in which that had happened only heightened his confusion. Each time he'd realised he'd been rambling and she'd fallen silent he'd looked at her, ready to apologise, only to find her smiling. Often she hid it behind her hand or her hair, but he still noticed. The confusing part was that the smile looked genuine, affectionate almost. To Reid that was most definitely an anomaly, so far outside of his experience throughout life as to be classified as weird.

Her fixation with the Smithsonian was also weird. For someone who had never been she really did mention it an awful lot. She'd mentioned it in passing several times since their first conversation about it back in the bar.

When they reached the coffee house Emily grabbed a table and sat down.

'Aren't we just picking up take out?' Reid asked.

'Yes we are, but now we're sprung I thought we could play hooky for a little while.' Emily said.

'Play hooky?' Reid repeated.

'Yes Dr Reid, play hooky. Don't tell me you're a hooky virgin?' Emily teased.

Reid blushed and flexed his fingers around the tops of his canes. 'We really should get back.' He said.

Emily raised her eyebrows and laughed. 'You _are_ a hooky virgin. Seriously, you've never cut class before?'

'Emily I was nine when I started High School and twelve when I graduated. I was emotionally invested in succeeding and graduating so why would I cut class?' Reid said.

Emily groaned. 'For that comment you have to buy the coffee. Just go get ours for now and before we leave we'll get a refresh and everyone else's.'

Reid studied her for a moment before sitting in one of the chairs, carefully leaning his canes against the wall. Digging his wallet out of his bag he handed her a twenty dollar bill. 'I remembered the list. You have to do the carrying.' He said.

Emily mentally kicked herself. Increasingly she found herself forgetting about his canes. It was as if she just didn't see them anymore. She grabbed the bill and stood up. 'I'm sorry, I didn't think, to be honest I forgot.' She said, nodding toward where the canes were propped.

Reid flashed a small smile and then another. Before he could get his lips back under control he found himself smiling widely at Emily. 'I think that's the best thing anyone has ever said to me.' He said.

**

* * *

**

Reid sipped his coffee and looked at his watch.

'That's the third time you've checked your watch.' Emily said.

'I just... clearly I'm not built for truancy.' Reid joked, his expression still worried. 'I think that cutting work on what is most likely to be my last day isn't the smartest thing I've ever done.'

'Was it really that bad? Strauss's meeting.' Emily asked.

'Yes.' Reid replied.

'I'm sure Hotch'll fight your corner, and seriously you are not in the team to do press junkets for Erin Strauss.' Emily said.

Reid was silent for a moment as he fiddled with his cup. 'I...'

'What?' Emily pushed.

Reid shook his head. 'I find myself anxious at the prospect of not being part of the team anymore. I don't know why. I've often moved from situation to situation, as a child I never settled in any one peer group and my progression through college was too rapid to cement any meaningful bonds... I'm used to moving on but...' He stopped short.

Emily ducked her head to meet Reid's eye. 'But?' She leaned forward and took his free hand. 'But you're part of the team now?' She said.

Reid finally looked up at her. 'Yes, and I'm really not ready to leave yet.' He said quietly.

'Speaking as a fellow Nomad, or, if you want a translation, Diplomats daughter, I understand exactly what you mean.' She replied.

A moment passed before Reid realised that Emily was stroking her thumb along the back of his. His hand suddenly felt hot where she was touching it and he pulled it away from her. Clearing his throat he looked around for his canes.

'We should probably get back. Face my firing squad.'' He said.

Emily nodded, her face flushed. Why the hell had she held his hand? 'I'll get the coffee and on the drive back you will keep yourself calm and try to build some faith in Hotch. Trust me Spencer, he'll have your back, you're great at what you do and he'll fight for you.' She said.

Reid grabbed his canes and stood, not meeting her eye. Emily stepped forward and put her hand on his shoulder.

'Reid, look at me, look at me. Take the compliment. You _are_ a great match for the team and Hotch won't just let you get kicked out because of something so insignificant.' Emily said.

'I know.' Reid said after a moment, his voice small.

On hearing a slight break in his voice Emily found herself pulling Reid into a hug. She rose up on her toes as she pulled him close, her fingers rubbing the collar of his light blue button down. It was supposed to be a brief, friendly embrace but a moment in and Emily didn't want to let go as her head was filled with the aroma of coffee and cologne and her hands were warming to the feel of his shoulders, the muscles taught under her palms. Another moment in she felt him put his hand tentatively on the small of her back, heard him breathe deeply, his face buried in her hair.

**

* * *

**

Morgan tossed the case file aside and glared at Emily.

'How long does it take?' He demanded.

'Don't yell at me, it's not my fault he's still in there.' Emily replied as she kept her face buried in the file in front of her. She'd been beet red since her display of affection in the coffee shop and her main concern right now was stopping Derek Morgan from picking up on it.

'This is too long.' He groused as he glanced at Hotch's office again.

When Emily and Reid had returned from their coffee run Hotch had immediately called Reid into his office. He'd been in there for a little over ten minutes which was apparently nine minutes too long for Morgan and also Garcia, who had turned up eight minutes ago to check the firewall software on Morgan's desktop.

'Don't we have an actual IT Department for that Garcia?' Emily said.

'Uh huh.' Garcia replied as she stared at Hitch's blinds. 'Wouldn't he be out by now if it was good news?' She asked Morgan.

'I have no idea baby girl. All I know is that we finally have a guy who fits in the team and we might lose him over bureaucratic crap.' He grumbled.

'Would that be the _non-field agent, consultant guy _you're referring to as _fitting into the team,_ Agent Morgan?' Emily teased.

'We still need a field agent.' Morgan said, belligerently.

'Ask and ye shall receive angel.' Garcia said distractedly.

Both Emily and Morgan stopped staring at Hotch's office and fixed their eyes on Garcia.

'What?' She asked.

'Do you know something? Are we getting a new agent?' Emily asked.

Garcia stood up and smoothed the front of her skirt. 'I said no such thing and whatever I did say, under these circumstances of great stress involving Dr Delicious, should not be take in to account when ... why are you so flushed?' Garcia said, stepping closer to Emily.

Emily feigned confusion. 'I'm not, it's a little hot in here but ...'

'It's a constant temperature in here Emily. It's not hot. Derek, you're a profiler, why is Emily blushing the same colour as my nail varnish?'

'She's been red and fidgety ever since she came back from her coffee run.' Morgan replied, his gaze still fixed on Hotch's office.

'Really, the coffee run with Reid?' Garcia said gleefully. 'Do you have anything you want to share with us Emily?'

'No.' Emily snapped.

'Defensive. Isn't that a tell tale sign of lying Morgan? Did he make a move on you in the line, wait, you made a move on him!'

'Garcia! Why on earth would he do that? And why would I do that with someone I work with?' Emily said.

'Well, our very own Dr McDreamy would do it because clearly he _likes_ you.' Garcia sung the last three words at Emily. 'And who cares if you work together, I've studied the handbook and the fraternisation rules clearly state that relationships between two _Agents_ is strictly ...'

'Wait, you checked the handbook? Why would you be checking that? What possible scenarios are going around in your head?' Emily asked.

'Oh, I don't know, just that you seem to like him and he seems to like you.' Garcia beamed.

Emily felt the heat grow in her cheeks again along with the irritation of knowing that the more she defended herself the more she sounded like a schoolgirl with a crush, and Garcia, although not a profiler, could see right through her at times. Just as she felt herself floundering for a reply. Morgan stood up.

'Door's opening.' He said.

Reid stepped out of Hotch's office and carefully navigated the stairs down to the bullpen. Once he reached his desk he balanced his canes against the edge of the partition and sagged into his chair.

Morgan, Emily and Garcia watched as he pulled a file toward himself and then stopped, his hand splayed on the brown folder. He blinked a couple of times. After a moment of silence he suddenly focused on his surroundings.

'Kid, you ok?' Morgan asked. 'Kid?' He repeated when Reid didn't answer.

'Reid?' Emily said.

Reid looked up. 'I got cleared to go on Custodials.' He said incredulously.

'So you're not fired because of your little faux pas?' Garcia said.

'I got cleared to go on Custodials.' Reid repeated, as he gave Emily his second thousand watt smile of the day.

**CMCM**


	8. Chapter 8

For disclaimer; See Chapter One

All reviews, alerts and favourites have been the greatest encouragement. Thank you.

NB This chapter alludes to and takes some dialogue from episode S3 E04; Children of the Dark.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Eight**

'How does that _not_ make you feel nauseous?' Morgan said, gripping the steering wheel.

Reid was settled in the passenger seat, three or four files stacked on his knee, pen flying over his notebook as the SUV sped along. 'What?' He replied absently.

'How do you not feel car sick reading and writing like that? Ever since I was a kid I got motion sickness. I either have to be driving or sitting up front staring at the road ahead.' Morgan said as he flicked the headlights on.

'It's most likely psychosomatic. You have an inherent need for control and as a child your body simply manifested that intense need into a physical ailment.' Reid said as he continued to write.

Morgan allowed his eyes to travel from the darkening road for a moment to glance at Reid. 'Seriously?' He said. 'You're suggesting that I get car sick because of my personality?'

Reid looked up for a moment and gazed thoughtfully ahead. 'Given your personality, I'd say it's most likely, yes.' He said.

Morgan grumbled under his breath. A mile down the road and Reid was still writing. 'It's nearly ten thirty, we were off the clock hours ago Reid. What is so important that it can't wait?' He said.

'That was my first custodial interview and I think it'll provide some basis for a paper I'm hoping to publish. I want to annotate my thoughts whilst they're fresh.' He said.

'You're publishing a paper? In addition to all the paper work we have to get through, you're publishing a paper?' Morgan asked.

'I like paperwork. I find it meditative.' Reid answered.

Morgan shook his head. Two miles further along the road and Morgan began to fiddle with the radio. Reid closed his notebook and sighed, loudly.

'I take it you want me to stop.' Reid said.

Morgan shrugged. 'Hey, no, don't stop on my account. I'm happy listening to a late night station whilst we drive, but you gotta be as tired as I am man. Why don't you get some sleep?' Morgan said.

Reid eyed him for a moment before resting his head back and closing his eyes. He'd only closed them for a moment before they flew open again. Since the previous week, when Emily had hugged him in the coffee shop, Reid had experienced troubling thoughts when his brain was idle. Every time he closed his eyes to rest he could smell the lightly floral scent of her hair, feel its silky warmth against his cheek. That wasn't the worst though. The worst was his hands. When he lay in bed at night, his hands wrapped loosely around his stomach, all he could feel was the light shift of her silk blouse at the small of her back, the gentle valley of her spine under his fingertips. He'd replayed those sensations as he fell asleep, waking only a couple of hours later, crumpled with sweat, guilty as a schoolboy at the arousal he felt in his body.

He _was_ tired from the Custodial interview he and Morgan had conducted and the long drive back wasn't helping his fatigue but he knew he couldn't fall asleep. He might dream about Emily again and given his physical response to the "Emily Dream" over the last few nights, Morgan would definitely notice. Reid fidgeted a little before leaning forward and turning the radio down.

'Sorry, too loud?' Morgan said.

'No. I'm not really tired. I thought we could talk about the interview?' Reid said. 'Do they always go like that?'

Reid hadn't really known what to expect for his first face to face interview with a serial killer but Larry Swift wasn't it. Swift was exceedingly polite and self effacing, softly spoken and almost so gentle in demeanour that Reid could have easily forgotten that he'd killed four men if he hadn't had the interview transcripts and crime scene photographs printed in his memory.

'A lot of inmates on a life stretch, or death row, get the urge to talk but most aren't as accommodating as Swift, or as polite. It was creepy wasn't it?' Morgan said.

Reid gave a wry smile and nodded.

Morgan continued, 'Every time I interview one of these guys I have a little bet going on with myself as to how long it will take for them to blame everything on their fathers.'

'It would appear that fathers do have a lot to answer for.' Reid said. 'I know mine liked to traumatise me by making me play in Little League.'

Morgan frowned. 'You played Little League?' He said.

Reid looked across at him. 'Is that so hard to believe?' He said.

'No, I just assumed that ...' Morgan stopped abruptly.

'You assumed what?' Reid said.

Morgan floundered for a moment. 'I just assumed that you'd always had... physical difficulties, sorry, I guess I shouldn't have.'

Reid was quiet for a moment as he watched the road fall in front of them. He tucked a strand of hair behind his ear and cleared his throat.

'My health problems aren't genetic or due to any birth defect, I had an accident.' Reid said eventually.

Morgan gripped the wheel a little harder, mentally kicking himself for bringing the subject up and at the same time hoping he hadn't just taken his and Reid's tentative friendship back to square one.

'I'm sorry, I really should learn when to keep my mouth closed, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable.' Morgan said.

Reid glanced at Morgan again and saw genuine worry in his friends face.

'You didn't, I just... I rarely talk to anyone about it, that's all. Gideon, sometimes, but no one else.' He replied.

Morgan shifted slightly in his seat. 'And now Gideon's in the wind.' He said.

Reid nodded. Morgan cleared his throat. 'So, what happened?' He asked.

Reid swallowed and fussed with the files on his knee, leaning to reach his bag before sliding them in. The silence in the SUV stretched on. Morgan was about to reach out and turn the radio back up when Reid began to speak.

'I...ah, it happened in high school.' He said.

'High school?' Morgan repeated.

'On the football field.' Reid said.

Morgan shook his head. 'Don't tell me, poor coaching and inadequate training and protective wear. Happens all the time. All it takes is for one bad take down or too many bigger guys in the pack and you've got the potential for high impact on some vulnerable areas of the developing body. I hope the school at least had some decent insurance.' Morgan said.

Reid turned to gaze out of window. 'Not really.' He replied quietly. He felt the sudden urge to tell Morgan exactly what had happened, that there had been no football game, but he knew he wouldn't.

Morgan shook his head again. 'How old were you?' He asked.

Reid pushed his hand through his hair. 'I was twelve... so yeah, it happened a little after my twelfth birthday, just before I graduated.'

'You graduated at twelve?' Morgan said his tone incredulous.

Reid shrugged. 'I was ahead in class.'

'So you were playing against guys who were what, nearly eighteen? No wonder you got hurt kid.' Morgan said.

Reid blinked, absently rubbing his left leg. His back was aching from spending too long in the SUV directly after too many hours sat on a Government Issue metal chair. 'Yeah, no wonder.' He replied.

Both men were silent for another half mile or so before Morgan spoke again.

'So, is it gonna get any better?' Morgan asked tentatively. 'It's just sometimes it looks like it bothers you.'

Reid frowned a little. Usually he was defensive when anyone asked about his disability but oddly he didn't feel disinclined to talk with Morgan about it today.

'Morgan, this _is_ better.' He said. 'After the um...accident, I was in hospital for three months, two of which were spent in traction and then I was in a wheelchair for nearly two years. Surgery and physiotherapy got me to this point. I would estimate that I should have approximately ten to fifteen more years of reasonable mobility before I'm back in a wheelchair permanently.' Reid said.

Morgan looked at Reid sharply, the wheel veering a little before he straightened up again. 'You're gonna be _back_ in a wheelchair? Why?' He asked.

'It's almost inevitable. As my body ages and with wear and tear over time the repairs the surgery made will degrade.' Reid said.

'How can you be so calm about it?' Morgan said.

'I've known for sometime Morgan. The inescapable won't go away because I'm angry.' Reid said, turning to look into the dark again.

'However long I'd known, I'd still be railing against it man.' Morgan said.

'You wouldn't "_go gentle_"?' Reid said, his mouth twitching a small smile.

'What?' Morgan said.

'Oh, it's a poem. Dylan Thomas. "_Do not go gentle into that good night, old age should rave and burn at the close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the night._" It's about death and not going quietly.' Reid said.

'I get it kid, really I do, but here's the thing, you've not reached old age yet and we're not talking about dying, we're talking about you accepting that things are gonna get a whole lot harder and not being pissed about it.' Morgan said. 'What about advances in surgery? If you had surgery, what, thirteen years ago, maybe there's something else they can do now? Have you checked it out?' Morgan pushed.

'It's not that simple, I ... I don't have... There are other commitments that I have to consider Morgan, and this, it's classed as a pre-existing condition that my insurance won't...' Reid took a deep breath. 'Nothing can be done.' He said finally, his tone of voice ending the discussion.

As they sat in silence Reid twisted his watch around his wrist, bunching the shirt sleeve beneath it uncomfortably as he did so. Eventually he began to speak again. 'This isn't something...I don't talk about this usually, it's private, so would you not tell any of the others? Please.' Reid said.

Morgan pulled the SUV over at a rest stop and released his seat belt.

'Of course not, it's not my story to tell, Reid.' Morgan said.

Reid smiled tentatively at his friend, the feeling of tension dissolving from his stomach. 'The other day, in the coffee shop, Emily told me that she sometimes forgets about my canes. It was the most normal I've ever felt.' He frowned and busied himself with straightening out his sleeve.

Morgan nodded and squeezed Reid's shoulder briefly. 'I hear you.'

* * *

Morgan and Reid were a little over half way back to DC when Morgan's cell rang.

'Baby girl. You're up late.' Morgan said.

'It's never too late to talk to you my friend.' She laughed. 'Are you back in the Capitol yet?'

'Not yet. We took a comfort break. It's been a long day.' Morgan said.

'Oh, so you're still with Reid?' Garcia said.

'Yes and be careful what you say sweetheart, you are loud and clear on speaker.' Morgan said.

'Just how I like it. Hello doctor.' Garcia said.

'Hi Garcia.' Reid replied.

'How was your first Custodial?' Garcia asked.

'It was enlightening.' Reid said.

'It was long.' Morgan countered. 'Too long and to round off the day Reid here has been making extra notes on the way home. I think he's working for extra credit.' Morgan teased.

'Timely note making makes for a well rounded and thorough presentation Morgan, be it case file notes, a paper or a lecture.' Reid said haughtily.

'Uh huh, whilst this is riveting I must digress for a moment. Morgan, did you ask the question yet?' Garcia asked.

Morgan's hands gripped the wheel a little harder.

'What question?' He asked.

'What question?' Reid echoed.

'Oh, don't you play dumb Derek; you know exactly what I'm talking about. You've had to be reminded of it three times in the past two weeks. Now, Kevin has gone out for the evening and I find myself at a loose end.' Garcia mused.

'You let Kevin go out?' Morgan said.

'Of course, it's good to let him think he has choices, but enough about my little bit of tech touch, I find myself bored and itching to load the latest version of Photoshop Agent Morgan. Now what should I create?' Garcia said thoughtfully.

'I'm asking ok.' Morgan yelped. 'I'm asking.' Morgan's hand darted forward and he disconnected the call.

When he glanced to his side Reid was staring at him.

'Should I be concerned that I only understood approximately twenty percent of that conversation?' He said.

Morgan groaned and thumped the steering wheel. 'Garcia thinks that Prentiss has the hots for you. She wants me to find out if you have the hots for her.'

'The _hots_?' Reid repeated.

'Please tell me you have heard of the terminology "_the hots_", seriously Reid, you did go to high school right?' Morgan said.

'Yes. We just established that I was twelve years old at the time. "_The hots_" must have passed me by somehow.' Reid said testily.

'Well?' Morgan said.

Reid squirmed in his seat. His back was starting to ache more and more and he didn't care for Morgan's line of questioning. 'Agent Prentiss is a colleague and a respected one I would never act on ...'

'Oh man, you do have the hots for her. Avoiding eye contact, raised vocal pitch, shifting in your seat, oh man.' Morgan laughed. 'So what are you gonna do about it kid?'

Reid blinked and stared at the road. 'I don't have juvenile feelings for Emily. I just happen to find her intelligent and interesting and she is a very attractive person and I would never expect her to ...' Reid trailed off, his memory flitting back to the scent of Emily's hair.

'Expect her to what?' Morgan said. 'Have _juvenile_ feelings back? Those feelings are called _attraction_ Reid and suppressing them doesn't make you a grown up.'

'I know that Morgan.' Reid snapped. 'Emily doesn't have feelings for me and I don't have feelings for her and I'd be obliged if you would drop the subject.' Reid said finally as he pulled his notebook back out of his bag and uncapped his pen. 'Your phone is ringing.' He said, as the ring tone for JJ filled the SUV.

* * *

Emily felt overwhelmed with emotion as she tidied up the files and photographs from the small office the team had used as a base for the last two days. The UnSubs, foster brothers Gary and Ervin, had suffered horrific childhood abuse at the hands of their foster parents but Emily still couldn't understand how to use this information to rationalise what they had done to their victims. They had entered family homes, beaten the parents to death whilst the children watched and then they had killed the children. They believed they were saving them.

She couldn't put her finger on what made this particular case so personal for her. The team had been involved in plenty of situations that involved children and plenty with children younger than the only surviving victim, Carrie Ortiz, but meeting Carrie and seeing her strength even after witnessing her parents and younger brother's murder, watching her face one of her attackers, gave Emily a strange feeling of longing and emptiness. She saw a little of herself in Carrie, a little stubbornness and a lot of fight, and she couldn't help but feel angry at the thought of the teenager being placed into foster care, the irony of her ending up in the same situation as Gary and Ervin not being lost.

She was so deep in her thoughts that she almost didn't hear Hotch as he stepped into the office and started gathering files with her. She felt her chest tighten as she slid Carries photograph across the table.

'I could take her.' She said.

Hotch stopped what he was doing. 'Take her?' He said.

'Carrie.' Emily said. 'To DC.'

'You mean to live with you?' Hotch said.

'Yeah.' Emily said.

'Why would you want to do that?' Hotch said.

'Well, I have room, money and you know, she's smart. Two year, three years she goes to college.' Emily shrugged.

'Prentiss,' Hotch stared at Emily, 'This is the job and I need to know that you can be objective.'

'And I need to know that I can be human.' Emily replied, her voice faltering.

'JJ heard from the family and they're on their way from LA.' Hotch said.

'Oh.' Emily said, staring down at the files on the table, nodding. 'That's, that's great.'

Emily busied herself gathering the remaining files, not trusting herself to look up until she knew Hotch had left the room. Once he had gone she hastily brushed at her eyes and smoothed her white T Shirt over her stomach, her hand pausing for a second as she did so. She gritted her teeth, not allowing any tears to fall. Quickly she pulled all the paperwork into her arms and turned toward the door.

'Are you OK?' Reid was standing by the doorway, leaning on his canes,his geographical profile map rolled under his arm.

Emily started. 'Yeah, yeah, I'm good. Ready to go home.' She nodded, a little too cheerfully.

'You're sure everything's ok?' Reid asked.

'Not now Reid.' Emily said as she brushed past him and out of the door.

* * *

On the jet Reid watched Emily as she talked with JJ. She had seemed upset back in the station house in Denver but had brushed him off when he had tried to talk to her about it. She said she was fine and even if she wasn't did he really expect her to talk to him about it? He mentally kicked himself for trying to do something he had never been any good at, talking to other people successfully, and for listening to Morgan and Garcia. He had told Morgan quite forcefully that he didn't believe that Emily had any feelings for him but deep down a small, destructive kernel of hope had settled in his stomach.

* * *

Emily walked wearily to her car, her footsteps mingling with JJ, Morgan and Reid's as they all made their way through the underground car park at Quantico.

'Night.' JJ said as she squeezed Emily's arm and unlocked her car as Morgan called his goodbyes and did the same.

'Night.' She called back. Her Go bag weighed heavily on her arm and she sighed, her shoulders sagging as she reached her car. Reid, who was parked next to her, cleared his throat.

'Goodnight.' He said.

Emily turned to him. 'Yeah, night.'

Reid fished his keys out of his messenger bag and slid his go bag from his shoulder to the floor, his eyes darting uncertainly back to Emily. She had told him she was alright earlier but she didn't seem alright.

Emily pulled open the back door and shoved her bag onto the back seat. Suddenly her throat tightened and she felt the weight of the last two days descend on her and thoughts of Carrie Ortiz, her own misspent teenage years and the hollow feeling inside that those years had created, coalesced with images of her empty apartment and her empty life.

'Why didn't you ask me to go to the Smithsonian with you?' She said suddenly, her voice echoing harshly around the concrete floor.

Reid turned to her, his expression puzzled. 'Excuse me?'

'When we were in Arts Bar, you said you'd take me to the Smithsonian but then you never asked me.' She said.

Reid's brow crinkled. 'I was supposed to ask you again? I thought saying that I'd take you meant exactly that, that I'd take you. You didn't follow the offer up with a request to go at any given specific time.'

'What? That's...' Emily felt a wave of irritation wash over her. Why didn't men ever get it? 'I was waiting for you to ask me. I mentioned it like, a dozen times!'

'You mentioned the Institute in passing but nothing specific. I don't understand why you're so angry with me Emily.' Reid said.

'I'm not angry, I'm ...' Emily looked up, willing the sudden tears she felt away. Why _was_ she so upset and angry? Why couldn't she just get in her car, drive home and get over the last couple of days? 'I'm tired and sad and I'm sick of pushing everything down, I'm sick of not being allowed to be human.' She said, the words tumbling out.

'That's what you said to Hotch, earlier today, about the Ortiz girl.' Reid replied. 'I asked you if you were alright and you said that you were.'

Emily groaned in frustration. 'People don't always say what they mean Reid, it's called emotion, you should look it up.'

Emily saw the look of hurt flash across Reid's face just before he turned back to his car, slipping one of his canes onto the back seat.

'Oh, Reid, I'm sorry, I didn't...' Emily rushed over to him and took hold of his free hand. 'I just... here, feel.'

She pulled his hand up and placed it on the left side of her chest. 'I need to know that it's ok to be affected by this stuff, that it's not wrong to feel saddened and scared and to want to have something better, some light in the middle of it all, that's why I told Hotch I could take Carrie, because of _this_.'

She pressed his hand harder to her chest until she could feel the beat of her heart through both their palms. 'I'm a human being and I think I'm starting to forget that.' She said.

'You said you were ok.' Reid said weakly, thoroughly confused and startled by her outburst. 'You said "_not now_", I _thought_ you were ok.'

'I changed my mind. Can I change it and say "_now_".' She leaned into him and pressed her lips against his desperately. 'I want to say _now_.' She repeated, kissing him again.

Reid couldn't breathe. Not because of Emily kissing him but because every part of his brain was screaming at him that this was wrong, girls didn't do this with him and when they did it was a trick, a joke that was always on him. He felt his breath catch in his throat. He pulled away, his back connecting with his car behind him.

'Stop it, please, I want you to stop.' He gasped.

Emily pulled back, breathless, her makeup smudged with tears. Reid stared at her for a moment, neither of them speaking. After a second he gently, cautiously, tangled his hand into the back of her hair and pulled her to him, kissing her back. Past experience told him to stop, but at that moment he knew couldn't.

**CMCM**


	9. Chapter 9

**For disclaimer; See Chapter One**

Q: How long does it take for an internet provider to replace a broken internet router?

A: 4 WEEKS APPARENTLY! Ok, I'm over it now (Not really. Not even slightly!) My apologies for the delay, we can now continue.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Nine**

For a moment Emily lost her balance. She steadied herself, placing the flat of her palm on his chest, her other hand settling on his shoulder as she leaned up to meet him. It felt odd to her at first. He held her in place with a single hand tangled in the back of her hair and it was so different to any other kiss she'd experienced.

All the men she had known had taken her over when they kissed, arms wrapping her shoulders and waist possessively, guardedly, as if they expected her to go so weak at the knees that they might have to support her at any moment, trapping her until they were ready to end it. The irony was that not one of those alpha males had ever made her feel as enervated by a single kiss as Reid did right now.

His hand, the strength he had in his long fingers, the control he was exerting just by cradling her head made Emily feel as though she were supported by a single thread. If he stopped, if he let go now, she was sure she would fall flat on her ass in the middle of the parking lot.

It took Emily a moment to realise that he _had_ stopped. His hand was still in her hair but he had moved back a little, his lips still close to hers but no longer touching. Emily looked up, confused when she saw the look of anger on his face. His hand slipped from her hair as she stepped back.

'I'm sorry.' She said.

The look of anger vanished and was replaced by a look of satisfaction. 'You were upset. It didn't mean anything. You don't need to apologise.' Reid said as he turned back to his car, slamming the passenger door closed.

Emily felt her irritation return. 'I didn't say I was sorry for _kissing _you. I said I was sorry because you didn't look as though you liked it.' She said.

Reid stopped and turned to look at her, his brow furrowed.

'What do you want?' He said.

'Excuse me?' Emily said.

'What do you want, from me? Why did you just kiss me?' Reid said. 'And why would you think I didn't like it?'

'Because you looked angry!' Emily said.

'I'm not angry, I'm confused. Kisses don't come without a price tag, Emily. I just want to know what the price is.' Reid said.

Emily stared at Reid and blinked. 'Alright. I don't even know where to begin with that statement ... seriously, a woman kisses you and your reaction is to get more suspicious than the NSA?'

Reid leaned against his car and scuffed his cane across the floor.

Emily sighed and scrubbed at her tear stained face. 'No price tag, Dr Reid, unless you count the huge cost to my ego.'

Emily turned and got into her car. She was peeling out of the lot before Spencer had time to blink.

* * *

Emily spent the first morning of the weekend slouching around in her PJ's, grateful for the rare free time. She was restless, but having made no plans she was unsure of what to do with herself.

One of the problems with the BAU was that the work took her away from home so frequently at the weekend that she had stopped making plans with people, fed up of having to cancel at the last minute.

She was about to ring JJ to see if she was free for a shopping trip when she heard a knock at the door. Dropping her phone on the couch she stepped into the hall, glancing at her reflection in the mirror. She hadn't been up long and had pulled her hair into a messy knot at the back of her neck. She hadn't even washed her face, let alone applied make up.

'You'd better be at the wrong apartment buddy, whoever you are.' She grumbled to herself as she reached the door.

She squinted through the peephole and groaned when she recognised her visitor. Why was Spencer Reid at her apartment door on a Saturday morning and why the hell did it have to be one of those rare Saturdays when she hadn't washed her hair and got dressed for a morning meeting JJ at a coffee shop or shopping with Garcia? Why did he have to show up on a slob out morning?

The knock sounded again, a little louder than before. Emily held her breath. She debated ignoring it and was about to creep away from the door when she heard his muffled voice.

'Did you know that the position of the lighting in your apartment causes a narrow shadow from your feet to be cast underneath your apartment door when you stand directly in front of it?' He said.

Begrudgingly Emily threw the bolt and unlocked the door.

'Dr Reid.' She said.

Reid stood before her, his hair impossibly messy and his navy sweater vest buttoned unevenly. He fidgeted with the tops of his canes, screwing the tips into the hallway flooring. He cleared his throat and looked away from her.

Emily raised her brows and waited. On seeing his face she had the urge to forgive him his behaviour the night before but the stronger part of her refused. She still felt hurt by his reaction to the kiss and more than a little angry with herself for allowing her emotions to get the better of her.

When she'd arrived home she had gone to bed with a glass of whiskey and laid in the dark thinking of all the things she should have said to him if only she hadn't felt so out of control with her feelings. It was the case, she told herself stubbornly. It was nothing to do with _him_ in particular. If it had been Hotch in the garage at that moment, or Morgan, it would have been one of them that she'd have kissed.

Unfortunately one glass of whiskey would never be enough to make her really believe that.

Rolling her eyes Emily drummed her finger tips on the door frame. 'Can I help you Dr Reid?' She asked.

After a moment of fidgeting he looked her in the eye. 'Jenny Carmichael.' He said.

'Jenny Carmichael?' She repeated.

'Yes. I was using a yellow crayon, to colour a picture of the sun. She wanted it to colour her drawing of a lake. I tried to tell her that I needed yellow to accurately represent the interpretation of the collection of radiation that is the sun, as it hits the human retina and is then processed by our visual cortex and that she did not need it for a body of water, as the appearance of colour in water is a reflection of its surroundings and therefore mostly blue from the sky or a darker green from the aquatic flora on the lake bed, but she wouldn't be convinced. Finally she told me that if I gave her the crayon she would give me a kiss. We were four years old.' Reid's face was flushed when he finished.

Emily stared at Reid's tense expression and successfully suppressed a smile. 'Did you take the deal?' She asked seriously, her anger with him mellowing a little.

'I did. Evidently at the age of four I was easily bought.' The corner of his mouth twitched in a small smile for a second before a frown appeared on his face. 'There are three other, similar instances throughout my life, which aren't so nice.' He swallowed and looked down at the floor.

Emily moved back from the door and waved him in. As he moved past her she could smell his cologne again. The sense memory of it brought back the feel of his hand in her hair and she had to fight the urge to inhale deeply.

'You have a wonderful view.' He said as he gazed out of the picture window.

Emily shrugged. 'I suppose it is. I think I've become complacent about it. I kind of assume everyone has the same luxury.'

'I know I don't. I have a small, family park in front of my building and I'm on the ground floor anyway so...' He trailed off, his gaze darting anywhere but Emily's face.

'Shouldn't you get dressed?' He asked eventually.

'Oh! Sorry, I... wait, what? I wasn't expecting company, I normally don't entertain people in my pyjamas.' Emily said, flushing and fiddling with her messy hair.

'No.. I didn't mean... I just thought, if you want to make it to the Smithsonian we should leave shortly.' He said.

'The Smithsonian?' Emily said, confused.

'You wanted me to ask you if you wanted to go.' Reid said.

Emily scrunched her face up in confusion. 'So this is you asking me?'

'Yes?' He said.

Emily raised her eyebrows at him.

'Sorry, I... right, would you like to go to the Smithsonian with me today, Agent Prentiss... Emily.' He said.

Finally Emily gave in to the urge to laugh. 'Yes. I would love to go to the Smithsonian with you today Dr Reid. Grab yourself a coffee from the kitchen, the pot's still warm, and I'll go get dressed.'

Reid flashed a small smile.

'So, it's close to eleven, will we fit it all in today?' Emily called as she reached her bedroom. She heard a muffled squeak from the vicinity of her kitchen.

'The Smithsonian is comprised of nineteen museums and galleries and the National Zoological Park Emily! We'll fit one gallery in today if we're lucky. How can you not know this?' He said.

As he stood in the hallway Reid heard Emily laughing. Nodding to himself he turned back to the kitchen. 'Very funny, Emily.' He said.

'Just because I haven't been, doesn't mean I don't know anything about it.' Emily called back. 'In fact I did read up on the Air and Space Museum. I'd love to go to the Einstein Planetarium.'

Reid leaned against the kitchen counter and smiled as he listened to Emily. 'That's my favourite exhibition.' He said to himself.

* * *

'Dr Reid, I haven't seen you in a while.' The museum docent greeted Reid warmly and nodded hello to Emily.

'Adele, it's good to see you again. How did the fund raiser go?' Reid said.

'Oh, amazing, absolutely amazing. We reached our total.' Adele said. 'So, are you doing the full tour today or just the planetarium?'

'Pretty much everything we can cram in I think.' Reid said.

'Great, we have a new addition since you were last here. I think you'll enjoy seeing it.' She said. 'It's Amelia Earhart's Lockheed Electra 10E. It looks perfect suspended next to "Old Bessie".

'Old Bessie?' Emily said.

'The aircraft Amelia Earhart favoured.' Reid explained.

'I didn't realise you were interested in Amelia Earhart.' Emily said.

The docent laughed. 'I don't think he is, he's just kind enough to listen to me expound on the subject! Anyway, you should get started. If you give me a moment I'll have a wheelchair for you.' She said, starting to move back toward her office.

'That's not necessary, thank you.' Reid said hurriedly. Turning to Emily he ushered her through the doors to the first exhibition, leaving Adele looking surprised in his wake.

* * *

'That was amazing.' Emily breathed excitedly as they headed toward the food court.

'It is a good show, isn't it?' Reid agreed.

They had toured half of the Air and Space exhibitions and then headed for the Einstein Planetarium. Reid had sat through the lecture and show many times and never failed to find it interesting, but this time it became more so as he found himself pointing out items of interest to Emily, whispering below the audio, much to the irritation of a man sat in front of them.

'It was beautiful, and to contemplate the notion that every molecule in our bodies started out as a swirling speck of the atmosphere, it's almost too _big_ a thought to have.' Emily laughed.

Reid smiled. 'It certainly does put our lives into perspective.' He said.

'It does.' Emily agreed.

They walked toward the tables in a comfortable silence. They had been in the museum for a couple of hours and had spent most of it on their feet, save for the time in the reclining chairs in the planetarium, and Emily had noticed that Reid was walking more and more slowly as the time wore on. She was relieved when he mentioned food, more for the opportunity for him to rest than for her to eat, although she was starving.

'Ok. So what's good in here, Dr Reid.' Emily said as they chose a table.

'The pizza is pretty safe.' He replied as he sank into one of the plastic chairs and leaned his canes against another.

'Pizza it is then. You drove us here so it's only fair that lunch is on me.' Emily grabbed her purse and started for the concession stand. 'Marguerita?' She asked, pointing at Reid.

'Did you just profile me?' Reid asked frowning a little.

'Absolutely.' She laughed back at him.

* * *

The pizza was good and Emily felt uncomfortably full by the time they had finished. She had polished off her own twelve inch spicy Italian before she noticed that Reid had only eaten half of his.

'Not hungry?' She asked.

Reid glanced at the half eaten pie. 'Pizza always makes me feel full rather quickly.' He lied.

He _had_ felt hungry but the hard plastic chair he was seated in, coupled with too much time on his feet, was resulting in tiny spirals of pain chasing through his lower back and the accompanying nausea in his stomach had successfully dissolved his hunger. Pushing his plate away, Reid reached for his coffee and stole a quick glance at Emily. She was already pulling a slice of his abandoned pizza from his plate.

'So, what was it like to be the daughter of an Ambassador?' He asked.

Emily stopped dead with the pizza slice dangling from her fingers. 'Well, it got me into three different exclusive finishing schools but I guess you wouldn't notice, huh?' She said, blushing as she bit into the slice.

'You might as well finish it. It's better than it going to waste.' Reid said, smiling.

Emily smiled back and pulled a long string of mozzarella from the slice of pie.

'OK, where to start. I got to meet a lot of very interesting people and learn a lot of languages. I learned that it's not easy to give an embassy bodyguard the slip but it can be done. I discovered that _all_ Italian boys are friendly and that my mother and father shouldn't really have had children.' Emily groaned as she finished.

'Just listen to me! How is it that it doesn't matter how old I get every time I start to talk about my childhood I mention my parents and get all emo?' She laughed.

'Emo? I don't understand.' Reid said.

'You know, _emo. _Overly emotional, and not in a good way.' Emily laughed. 'You've never heard that before?'

'No. No I haven't.' He looked puzzled and Emily felt a sudden surge of affection for him and reached for his hand.

'You were a college lecturer, surrounded by kids all day and you _never_ heard the word emo?' She joked. 'Did you just _not_ notice the bunch of kids all dressed in black and lacking a sense of humor?'

Reid looked thoughtful for a moment. 'You pretty much just described all of my Psychology to Death and Dying class.' He said.

'Seriously?' She laughed.

'It's a valid study topic. It focuses on the psychological aspects of death and dying and teaches the meaning of death and ways of handling its personal and social implications. I also included psychological, sociological, cultural, and religious views of death.' He shrugged. 'I did wonder why they never laughed at any of my jokes.' He said.

Emily laughed again and Reid felt a warm rush of pleasure at the sound of her voice. His stomach still felt queasy, his back hurt and he was tired but there was nowhere else he'd rather be.

'So, my turn. Tell me what had you drinking coffee at nine years old.' Emily said.

Reid tensed and pulled his hand back from Emily's. Tucking his hair behind his ears he cleared his throat a couple of times.

'I read that caffeine aided wakefulness. I didn't have money to buy coke or any of those high energy drinks and we always had coffee in the house so, I just started drinking it.' He said.

'And what does a nine year old Spencer Reid need to stay awake for?' Emily questioned.

'I had a lot of school work and um... well, I was a carer for my mom, she was sick...a lot, and at that point my dad was away most of the time, so, I needed to stay awake.' He said.

'Oh.' Emily sat back in her chair, unsure of what to say. 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ...'

Reid shrugged. 'It's not uncommon for minors to care for sick parents. An informal study in 2001 showed nine hundred young carers under the age of sixteen in Las Vegas alone. Statistics suggest that there are three hundred and seventy five thousand child carers in the United States but this figure is most likely a massive underestimate.'

'You had some help though, right?' Emily said.

'No.' Reid said. 'My family consisted of my parents, there was no one else.'

'What about the state. Surely they have programs in place to help families like yours?' Emily said.

'My mom and I never told anyone that my father wasn't around.' Reid said.

'_Why?_' Emily said.

'I suppose at first I was expecting him to come back. It wasn't like he'd packed a bag and made a show of leaving and by the time he did pack a bag and leave for good I had been my mom's sole source of support for over a year and I got used to it. A couple of years later, when I had my accident,' Reid gestured toward his canes, 'I had home help for my own needs for a while but my mom's health was a little better at that time and it didn't seem relevant for me to highlight issues that weren't at the fore at that precise moment. ' Reid said.

Emily hesitated for a moment, staring at the man in front of her, unable to get a read on his expression. 'I still think it might have been better to get some help, from somewhere.'

'You think I'd have had a better childhood in a foster home?' Reid said.

'No! I just ... I don't know, I just hate to think of any kid struggling like that.' Emily fiddled with the empty sugar packets strewn over the table top. 'So, I guess I'll feel a little _less_ hard done by the next time someone asks me about my experiences growing up.' She smiled, nervously.

'Everyone's experiences are unique, Emily. Just because yours are different to mine and you perceive mine to be worse, it doesn't mean that your assumption is true.' Reid said. 'My mother never abandoned me, Emily. Sometimes she couldn't be who I needed her to be, but she was always there and she was and is a wonderful mother.'

'Did you just profile me?' Emily asked, smiling as she fought back a swell of hurt thinking about her own mother. Whilst she loved her, she could never imagine speaking about her with the tenderness and regard Reid had just spoken about his mother.

'Absolutely.' Reid smiled back.

* * *

Another two hours in the museum and Emily had seen what felt like every inch of Air and Space. Her feet ached and she felt pleasantly tired as Reid drove her back to her apartment. As they reached their destination Emily felt her stomach sink.

'I had a great time today Reid, really. Thank you for taking me.' Emily said as she unbuckled her seat belt.

'I enjoyed it also. There is something about going to a favourite place with someone else that makes the experience _more,_ somehow.' He said.

Emily shifted in her seat, her hand on the door handle. She looked across at Reid. In the half light she caught a small frown on his face.

'What's the frown for?' She asked.

He looked up at her. She noticed how tired he looked. His hair fell into his eyes briefly before he swiped it away. 'I feel that I should do something now, but I have no idea what.' He said, his voice hitching.

Emily's mouth felt dry suddenly and she could feel her skin warming on her face.

'I have a suggestion.' She said carefully. 'I know past experience in this vein has proven negative for you, however I would like to propose a trade, one which I hope might be mutually beneficial.'

Reid stared at her. 'A trade?'

'A trade. I'll give you _one_ kiss if you agree to take me to _one_ of the other eighteen museums sometime.' She said.

Without waiting for him to answer Emily leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. She felt him tense at first, but after a moment he leaned into her body and pressed his lips back into hers. Inhaling, deeply Emily closed her eyes. Reaching up she tangled her hand into his hair, curling her fingers as she suddenly felt his hand on her waist. She could feel the warmth of his fingers through the thin fabric of her shirt. After a moment she heard him draw a sharp breath. He moved back a little.

'Are you ok?' She asked.

'Yes, yes...I...um, I'm just a little tired. About your deal? May I suggest the Portrait Gallery?' He said, his voice squeaking a little.

'Deal.' Emily said, smiling.


	10. Chapter 10

For disclaimer; See Chapter One

Thanks one again for all alerts, favourites and reviews.

**The Consultant**

**Chapter Ten**

Reid had never felt more relieved to reach his apartment before. He felt his whole body relax as he pushed his key in the lock, to the point that he found it near impossible to get his legs to move the final few feet to his recliner.

He wasn't glad to be home because he hadn't enjoyed his day with Emily, on the contrary, he had never had a day like it. He'd never spent time with a woman like Emily before, or any woman who made him feel the way she did. He couldn't stop thinking about her, how she had leaned into him in the planetarium so she could hear him tell her about the constellations and spiral galaxies, how she seemed completely relaxed with him and how, for the first time in his life, he felt at ease with someone else, other than his mother, being so close to him.

One thing he couldn't deny though was the toll the day had taken on him physically. It was his fault, no one else's. His pride had stopped him from accepting the wheelchair Adele had offered and his pride had stopped him from using one of the blue bays right outside the museum to park in, resulting in a good ten minute walk to the gallery before they had even started the tour. It hadn't been a conscious decision but Reid could still identify what he was trying to achieve by his actions. Logically he knew Emily knew he was disabled, she saw him walk with the aid of his canes every day, but a small part of him childishly wanted to avoid drawing any more attention to it than he had to. A small part of him hoped she could forget, just as she had that day in the coffee shop.

He was paying the price now and would be tomorrow. Screwing his eyes shut he tried to stamp down on the nagging fear that he wouldn't be well enough to go into the office on Monday. How stupid would that be? Drawing the whole team's attention to his physical weaknesses because he'd been trying to hide them from a girl that he liked?

After only five minutes Reid knew he wouldn't find comfort in the recliner and reluctantly pushed himself up with his canes and slowly walked to his bedroom. At a snail's pace he changed into his sleep pants. He pulled his shirt off over his head and his hand strayed to the Velcro fastenings of the stiff lumbar support. It wasn't usual for him to sleep in it but he knew if he removed it now he'd be in agony. Sighing, he straightened up, pulled the Velcro strapping open and then pulled it tightly closed again, bringing the support more tightly around his lower back. Finally he grabbed an oversized FBI t-shirt from under his pillow. Garcia had given him the shirt at the end of his probationary three months. He smiled as he pulled it over his head. It was a ridiculous shirt but he liked it. He could only wear it in his apartment as Garcia had embroidered the word _'consultant'_ below the letters _'FBI'_ in a rainbow of different coloured wool, but it was definitely his favourite. No one had ever given him something made especially for him and he had been surprised at how touched he had felt at the time.

Once he was done changing Reid pushed his unwilling body back to the kitchen and filled one of his larger flasks with coffee. He grabbed a pack of rice krispie bars from the cupboard, shoved them in to the stretched out pocket of his pants and moved through to the lounge. Stopping at one of the overly stacked sets of shelving he leaned his cane against the wood and grabbed a DVD. Gripping the case between his teeth he took up his cane and, despite the early hour, carefully made his way to bed.

* * *

Reid woke up with a jolt. The phone was ringing and on his TV screen Commander Will Riker was boldly ordering a saucer separation on the bridge of the Enterprise D.

He rolled to his left, feeling for the remote, only to be met by a searing pain that originated in his lower back and shot down his left leg. Groaning, he gritted his teeth, his hand clenched in the comforter. After a moment he took a deep breath and opened his eyes. He slowly turned his head to locate the remote. Finding it on the pillow next to him he lowered the sound of _Star Trek Generations_ and tried to reach for the phone that was set on his night stand. The twist of his shoulders set off another volley of sharp pain in his lower back.

'Gah.' He gasped as he lowered his arm.

The phone gave two more shrill rings before the answer machine kicked in. From the lounge Reid could hear his mother's disembodied voice. It was too far away to hear exactly what she was saying but he could tell it was her.

'Great. _Now_ you want to talk to me.' He muttered breathlessly.

His stomach rolled and he took another deep breath. The pain was making him nauseous. He needed to get to the bathroom. Cautiously he pushed himself up and levered his legs over the side of the bed. The room tilted as fresh spasms circled his lower torso and black spots danced before his eyes. After a moment spent steadying his breathing Reid reached for the phone. His mother had already rung off but he slipped the handset into his pants pocket in case she called back, then, gripping his canes firmly, he pushed himself upwards.

His left leg was almost completely numb and the sole of his foot gave an unpleasant feeling of pins and needles when he pressed it to the floor. Grimacing, he let his right leg bear most of his weight as he set his canes forward. Dredging up every ounce of strength he dragged his left leg along, his weight fully on his canes.

His knuckles were white as he gripped the smooth wood and he grunted with exertion as he struggled to raise his left leg enough to compensate for the drooping of his foot. Every time his damaged vertebrae and inflamed nerves flared up he would experience loss of muscle tone in his left leg and his foot would feel as if it had gone to sleep, refusing to obey the signals from his brain.

His stomach lurched as he reached the hallway and in his haste to reach the bathroom Reid stepped forward with his right leg before he had his left foot flat to the floor. His leg buckled and the canes he relied upon slipped from under him, clattering loudly onto the wooden planks, moments before he landed heavily next to them.

* * *

The phone was ringing when Emily stepped out of the bathroom. She'd been in the shower for a while, treating herself to a long overdue beauty regime. Running into her bedroom she snagged the handset before the caller hung up.

'Hello.' She said.

'Hey Emily, it's me.' JJ's voice came through the line.

'Hey. I thought you were visiting your "_sick aunt".' _She said sarcastically.

'You're actually making those annoying little speech marks with your fingers right now aren't you?' JJ said.

'Just with the one hand. I can't do both and hold the phone.' Emily laughed.

'Funny.' JJ said. 'Anyway, I _was_ visiting my _very _sick aunt but something came up.'

'What? She got a case at the last minute?' Emily said dryly.

'Why does everyone think I'm dating Detective LaMontagne?' JJ said.

'Why do you think you need to keep it a secret?' Emily countered as JJ sighed loudly.

'I wasn't calling to talk about me, I was calling to make sure you were ok. The case seemed to take it out of you.' JJ said.

'I'm fine, really.' Emily said.

'Really? Come on Em, it's me you're talking to.' JJ said.

'Really. I _was_ upset but I pulled myself together. It's the job JJ, you know that.' Emily said.

'I know it's the job Emily, but knowing what it entails doesn't mean we're not affected.' JJ said.

'You don't have to worry about me.' Emily sighed.

'I don't have to, but as a friend I'm going to. I just didn't want you sitting at home, alone, thinking that you couldn't talk to anyone, which is why I've been calling you all day. You really shouldn't screen your calls you know.' JJ said, sounding a little hurt.

'I wasn't screening, I was out.' Emily said. 'So you see I wasn't home alone so you needn't have worried.'

'Lucky girl. I was bored to tears and had no one to hang with.' JJ complained.

'Ha! So you weren't just checking up on me, you wanted someone to go out with.' Emily laughed.

'Ok, you got me, I'm not completely selfless. So what _did_ you do with your day off?' JJ asked.

'Oh, um...well. I... I went to the Smithsonian with... Reid.' She said carefully.

'Reid. _Our_ Reid?' JJ asked.

Emily gritted her teeth. 'Our Reid.' She confirmed.

'Hold that thought. Let me get Garcia on the other line.' JJ said, the smile evident in her voice.

'Great.' Groaned Emily as she sank down onto her bed.

* * *

Reid lay on his side, the hard wooden flooring digging into his left hip painfully. He had landed on top of one of his canes, the other had skittered away from him and was resting against the skirting a little way down the hall.

Taking a deep, steadying breath Reid rolled onto his back, letting out a low moan as he did so. Squeezing his eyes shut he set his teeth against the pain. All he had to do was stay still for a little while, get his breathing under control and then try to pull his cane from beneath him. Simple. He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. It was cracked and a little dingy.

'I should get someone in to paint.' He said to himself.

* * *

Morgan paced his living room floor as he dialled the number on his cell phone. He was officially having the worst weekend in history. His date the previous night had stood him up. He wouldn't have minded so much but this woman had pursued him relentlessly and finally when he had asked her on a date she'd taken him up on the offer and then not showed. Morgan _could_ have profiled her and defined her abandonment and daddy issues but instead he laughed it off.

Saturday night was supposed to be for the boys. Poker night. It was a long standing commitment and he'd been looking forward to it and then one of his buddies had bailed. One of his kids was sick and he couldn't make it and it was up to Morgan to find an extra man to make the numbers up. Sighing he waited for his cell to connect.

'It's probably social suicide to invite him, but it'll be worth it to see someone kick Stillson's ass.' He muttered to himself.

* * *

Reid had been staring at the ceiling for about five minutes when the phone rang in his pocket. It made him jump and the slight jarring of the movement sent his back into spasm again. Groaning he fished the phone out of his pocket.

'Dr Spencer Reid.' He said.

'Reid, it's me.' Morgan said.

'Morgan? Do we have a case?' Reid answered, praying that they didn't.

'No case kid. What are you doing tonight?' Morgan laughed.

'What? It's _already tonight_.' Reid said.

'It's nine thirty Reid, the night hasn't even started yet. Look I need a fourth for poker, you in?' Morgan said. 'I know I'll end up broke and regretting it and possibly with friends who will never speak to me again but you know ...' Morgan tailed off.

'What?' Reid said. He was trying to follow Morgans conversation but the throbbing in his back and the chill that was setting in from laying on the floor were distracting.

'Are you ok?' Morgan said.

'Yes, sorry. I was in the middle of some reading. Sorry, what were you saying?' Reid replied.

'I wanted to know if you were up for a game of poker.'

Reid could feel draught all around him and knew he needed to get up. Keeping the phone to his ear he carefully rolled himself onto his side, stifling a gasp as his cane dug into his ribs and his stomach rolled.

'Hey, kid, are you alright?' Morgan's voice was filled with concern.

'What? Yeah, sorry Morgan I really have to go and finish the letter I was writing. I'll see you Monday ok? Have fun at the bar.' Reid said, breathlessly.

Morgan was quiet for a moment. 'Sure thing kid. See you Monday.'

* * *

Morgan stared thoughtfully at the cell phone in his hand for a couple of minutes before shoving it into his pocket. He grabbed his jacket and his keys and headed out of the door.

* * *

Emily's ears rang with the sound of Garcia enthusiastically clapping her hands over the phone.

'Oh this does sound deliciously promising my doves.' She said happily. 'When are you going on date two?'

'We've only just got back from date one PG and really, I'm not even sure that it was a date.' Emily said.

Garcia and JJ both made dismissive noises and Emily rolled her eyes at the phone in her hand.

'Did he ask you to go out for the day with him?' Garcia asked.

'Yes.' Emily said.

'Was he attentive and did he ask you what _you_ wanted to do?' Garcia continued.

'Yes.' Emily sighed.

'Did you hold hands?' Garcia demanded.

'Ha! No, we did not hold hands!' Emily countered triumphantly.

'Oh, oh, it's a void question in this case.' JJ interrupted happily.

'How so?' Garcia asked as Emily made objections in her ear.

'Spence can't hold hands when he's walking, he has his canes.' JJ said.

'Objection sustained. Void question Agent Emily. Did you kiss?' Garcia asked, bluntly.

The silence was a beat longer than it should be and Garcia barely managed to withhold a shriek of glee.

'Yes, alright you vultures, yes we kissed. Satisfied?' Emily said.

'The question is Emily, were you?' Garcia laughed naughtily.

* * *

It only took Morgan eleven minutes to reach the apartment block and another two to sweet talk one of the exiting residents enough for her to not notice that she had just let a stranger into the small block.

The place he was looking for was on the ground floor and he found himself knocking and trying the door handle simultaneously. No one answered and the door was locked.

Morgan paused and spent an extra moment wrangling with what he should do. Silently he slipped his cell from his pocket and dialled Reid's number. He could hear the faint ring of the cell within the apartment. He knocked again.

When Reid still didn't answer Morgan pulled a small black wallet out of his back pocket. Removing a small metal rod he inserted it into the lock and deftly wiggled it. The resulting click was loud in the stillness of the apartment.

Pushing the door open Morgan stepped into the hallway and closed the door behind him. The first things to register were the canes he could see laying on the floor further down the hallway and the sound of coughing that was coming from the same area.

'Reid?' Morgan called as he walked down the hall. Stepping over the canes he came to a doorway. Light spilled from around the half open door and the coughing had been replaced by deep breathing.

Morgan pushed the door open and stepped into the bathroom.

Reid shrieked.

* * *

Emily's ear had begun to feel hot from holding the phone to it and she had started to multi task and tidy up her bedroom whilst JJ and Garcia carried on the conversation without her.

'Emily!' Garcia said loudly.

'Ow, what was that for?' Emily moaned as her ear rang.

'You weren't listening! JJ asked when you were going to see him again.'

'Monday PG. We work together.' Emily quipped.

Both JJ and Garcia were silent for a moment. 'Why are you so evasive about this honey?' Garcia finally asked gently.

Emily sighed. 'Why is JJ so secretive about Will LaMontagne? Why are you so guarded about how you and Kevin met? It's just...the job and the team...everything gets consumed Garcia, everything. I think... I think I could really like him, even though he's probably all wrong for me and unlike any other guy I've ever gone for. I'd just like to hold onto this for a little while longer before it gets swallowed up, and that's before I even think about the ramifications of breaking the fraternisation rule!' Emily said.

'The rule applies to _Agents_. Reid is a consultant ergo no rules broken. And for the record I would _love_ to tell you about how Kevin and I met ...' Garcia suddenly stopped and both JJ and Emily heard Kevin's deep muffled voice in the background. 'But I can't really discuss it.' She finished primly.

'Emily, listen to me. Spence seems like a really good guy and they don't come along that often. Screw the job, screw the team, go for it.' JJ said.

'_Screw_ the team? Really JJ?' Emily blew out a low whistle. 'Boy, am I glad Gideon left.' She laughed.

* * *

'What are you doing in my bathroom!' Reid yelped from where he sat on the floor, his back against the wall. 'You scared me half to death!'

'I knocked! I rang! I was worried.' Morgan yelped back, more than a little worried at seeing his friend on the floor. 'What the hell happened, did you fall?'

'What? No!' Just ... why are you even here?' Reid said.

'I called you...'

'And I said I was busy!' Reid said, interrupting.

'I called you and you sounded off! You were distracted and confused.' Morgan said.

'I was not! I was in the middle of something.' Reid said, his tone indignant.

'And what was that? Reading or writing a letter, because you sure as hell couldn't decide fifteen minutes ago.' Morgan said as he glared at Reid. He watched as his friends shoulders slumped and suddenly, as quickly as it had risen, Morgan felt the anger seep out of him. He crouched down next to Reid.

'What's wrong.' He asked.

Reid looked away from Morgan and swallowed. 'Nothing, I just ... I tripped and... I needed to get to the bathroom. I felt sick.' He said.

'You think you picked up a bug or something?' Morgan asked.

Reid shook his head. 'Not that kind of sick. Sometimes, when I've pushed things too hard, my back seizes up and the pain makes me nauseated. I just need to go to bed and rest and I'll be fine by Monday. Really.' Reid said.

'And how do you plan on getting back to bed? Your canes are in the hallway.' Morgan said.

Reid's face flushed. 'I can do it. I've done it before Derek. Please, just go home.'

Morgan stood and pulled off his jacket, tossing it over the side of the bath.

'What are you doing?' Reid asked.

'I'm helping my friend who's sick, what does it look like?' Morgan said. 'This is what friends do Reid. You need to get used to it. Now, tell me what you need, kid.'

Reid leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. 'I need my chair.' He said finally.

'Where is it?' Morgan asked.

'Study. It's the room across the hallway.' Reid said, his voice sounding defeated.

Morgan gave his shoulder a quick squeeze as he left the room. Pushing the study door open Morgan was greeted with a dark room dominated by a large desk and a vast amount of books. Sitting in the corner, at one end of the desk, was a wheelchair.

When Morgan returned to the bathroom Reid was leaned forward, flushing the toilet.

'You ok?' Morgan asked.

'I need to brush my teeth.' Reid said quietly.

The room fell silent. Morgan tapped his hands a few times on the back of the chair.

'Can you um... are you...do you need me to help you?' Morgan said finally, as he nodded toward the chair.

Reid nodded. 'You can't pull yourself up into a wheelchair unless you want it to end up on top of you.' Reid let out a small, mirthless laugh.

Morgan leaned down toward his friend. 'Put your arm around my shoulders and I'll support your waist, alright?'

Reid nodded again. 'I just...I need to take it slow, ok?' Reid breathed.

'As slow as you want to kid.' Morgan agreed.

Reid slipped his arm around Morgan's neck and tensed a little as he felt Morgan grasp his waist.

'Ready?' Morgan asked.

He felt Reid nod and slowly helped him stand. When Reid was almost upright he heard him draw in a sharp breath.

'You want to stop for a minute?' Morgan asked.

'Please. Just for a second.' Reid breathed.

As they stood in the bathroom, Reid leaning against Morgan, Morgan could feel how tense Reid was. He was hardly breathing.

'You ready to sit down now?' Morgan asked.

Reid nodded again and Morgan helped him step toward the chair. Once he was seated Reid expertly manoeuvred himself over to the low sink and grabbed a toothbrush.

'I'll put some coffee on.' Morgan said as he left the room.

* * *

Morgan fixed the coffee and then took a look around Reid's living space. The lounge area was large and opened out into a smaller kitchen area that had a counter to separate the two spaces. All the walls were painted a soft white, which, combined with the rich wooden flooring throughout gave a relaxed feel to the place. What stood out the most though were the little touches that made it clear that a disabled person lived here.

Morgan had noticed when he arrived that the light switches were lower than in his own home. The furniture was well spaced, the door frames wider and the floors kept free off all clutter. Everything designed for the occupant of a wheelchair. Morgan was unsure why he felt so surprised by this. Reid had already told him that he'd spent some time in a wheelchair in the past, but to see his current living space geared up for it was still a shock to him.

'You found the coffee?' Reid said, making Morgan jump.

'Yeah.' Morgan said, raising his cup. 'You have a nice place.' He said, lamely.

Reid flushed and looked away as he wheeled himself toward the couch. 'Look, Morgan, you really didn't have to come here. I know it looked bad but really, it's not a big deal.' Reid said.

'Not a big deal? I found you on the floor Reid.' Morgan said.

'And I would have made it back to bed just fine. I'm grateful for the help, truly, but...' Reid shook his head. 'I just over did things today and, like I said, sometimes when that happens my back complains. The last time it happened was about five months ago and I rested and a couple of days later I was good again. All I want right now is to sleep, so really, you can go home Morgan.'

Morgan gave Reid an appraising look. 'Alright, but only if I know you've made it to bed.' He said.

Reid's knuckles whitened as he clenched his hands on the arms of his chair. Morgan folded his arms.

'I get it kid, really I do. You've independent and you won't allow your disability to define who you are and you hate when it's forced into people's faces.'

'I thought we didn't profile each other _Derek_.' Reid snapped sulkily as he pushed himself back and started to wheel down the hall.

'I'm not finished.' Morgan said.

Reid stopped his chair and turned back to look at Morgan.

'Like _I_ said, I'm a friend and I need to be sure you're ok. When you're ok I'll go back to being occasionally insensitive and you can go back to being insufferable and we won't talk about this again.' Morgan said.

Reid still had a sulky expression on his face when he turned his chair back toward his bedroom and muttered '_Fine!_'

**CMCM**


	11. Chapter 11

**For disclaimer; See Chapter One**

**Thanks for all Alerts, Favourites and Reviews.**

**Chapter Eleven**

**The Consultant**

Reid had forgotten all about his mother's telephone message until he was about to leave for work on Monday morning. In fairness to his near perfect memory he hadn't gotten out of bed much the day before. He'd cocooned himself with the hated pain killers and DVD's and sleep, only rousing to make slow trips to the bathroom and to answer three calls from Morgan.

At first he found it irritating that his colleague kept calling him at each mealtime to ensure he was able to get up and get food, but later on in the evening, when he had managed to get up and stay up long enough to sit in his recliner and read, it struck him that it was the first time he'd had someone call to check up on him during one of his flare ups, and it felt nice.

By the end of Sunday evening the pain in his back had receded enough for him to go to work the following day. He knew he was pushing his luck using his canes but he couldn't bring himself to use his chair. He knew Hotch, and now Morgan had seen him in it but he didn't want the others to, not yet, not at all, if he could help it.

He'd got up early, showered and dressed and was about to leave his apartment when he noticed the light flashing on his answer machine.

'_Spencer, this is your mother. You will never believe the fortune that fate has placed in my path. We have new staff, I'd like to think that the NEANDERTHALS who do the hiring around here have actually employed ones with brains this time but only time will tell... anyway, one of them... it's HER, Spencer, one of the new members of staff, is that Lisbon girl. She's on housekeeping. Do you know Spencer that it is amazing how many of the inmates, sorry I know you hate when I refer to my fellow prisoners that way, it's amazing how many of the patients have started to drop copious amounts of food at meal times. The mess is causing great distress. Also several of my dear friends have recently taken to wetting their beds, every single night. They think it's the new medications. It must be awful for the staff, for the new girl especially, coming into a job like this and finding out just how much mess you have to clean up, but do you know what I think Spencer? I think that maybe it's about time life showed Miss Alexa Lisbon that there are some messes that you have to clean up yourself, don't you my darling boy? Anyway, I have to go. You probably have your line recorded now that you've been indoctrinated by fascists. I love you Spencer. Always remember that.'_

Reid closed his eyes and drew a deep breath. He didn't usually allow himself to think about Alexa Lisbon and her circle of friends. He found he was mostly successful, baring a few nightmares in which she and Harper Hillman loomed large with the football team behind them, but he didn't need any extra reminders. If Alexa was working at Bennington now, it would be all that his mother talked about.

* * *

Morgan was surprised to find that he wasn't the first one in the office. He'd risen early in order to get ahead with some of his case files and had arrived just after seven. Hotch hadn't even arrived yet, but Reid had.

'Hey kid. I thought you might have called in sick but here you are even earlier than Hotch. You feeling better?' Morgan asked.

'Much better. Thanks.' Reid said quietly as he shuffled through the file in front of him. 'Uh... I finished off the Morton file and the Draycott one. I thought...um, well, thank you, for Saturday night.' Reid mumbled.

Morgan swung around in his chair and looked at his colleague. 'You didn't have to do that, but thanks, I was getting behind, and about Saturday, anytime Reid, I mean it.'

'I'll be fine Morgan; I'll take it easy for the next few days.' Reid smiled.

'So, I didn't get chance to ask before, what were you doing to get yourself that exhausted anyways? Morgan said.

Reid stopped flicking through the file abruptly. 'Oh, well I was just...um...nothing really, well not nothing but...I...' Reid stammered.

Morgan immediately picked up on the fact that not only was Reid floundering but he was also blushing.

'Alright youngster, out with it. What were you doing that's got you all tongue tied.' He said, leaning back in his chair and lacing his fingers behind his head.

'Nothing!' Reid lied.

Morgan smiled broadly and shook his head. 'Reciprocity kid. I share with you, you share with me. It's what friends do.'

'But you haven't shared any information with me.' Reid argued.

'And I never will if you don't start the ball rolling.' Morgan replied. 'Trust me, I'm not gonna leave it alone. You _will_ be educated in the art of friendship by the time I'm finished with you Spencer Reid, so come on, spill.'

Reid frowned. He knew himself well enough to recognise that he was naturally a very private person, but sometimes he had to wonder if that was just because of circumstance. If he _had_ friends would he share with them? He'd had a few as a kid, Jeff and a couple of others, but as children their conversations were superficial and he had never shared important things with them, things about his mother and father, but that didn't help him understand if it was his true nature. Not sharing about his family was simple survival. Any kid knew not to tell when your mother talked to people who weren't there. Any kid who had spent their weekend memorising and writing out Dylan lyrics knew not to stand up and share in class when the teachers asked what they had done on their days off.

Reid ran his fingers through his hair and looked back at Morgan. 'I was on a date, with Emily.' He said quickly.

Morgan's brows shot up. 'Our Emily. Emily Prentiss?'

'Yes, Agent Prentiss.' Reid said.

'Oh, please tell me you loosened up enough to drop the 'agent'.' Morgan laughed.

'What? Of course!' Reid said.

'So how exactly did you put your back out then, lover boy?' Morgan said suggestively.

'It wasn't like that! I would never...shut up Morgan.' Reid said blushing further. 'I took her to the Smithsonian and it was a lot of walking, that's all.'

Morgan was quiet for a moment. 'You've been to the Smithsonian before right, I remember you talking about it.' He said.

'Yes.' Reid nodded.

'So you know how long you're normally there for and how much walking is involved so why didn't you use a chair? They even provide them for you. I know last time my mom came to visit she brought my great aunt and we went to one of the galleries. They provided a chair for my aunt to use.' Morgan said.

Reid scowled at Morgan. 'Exactly. Wheelchairs should be for Great Aunt's and the elderly, not twenty five year old men on first dates. How many first dates would you like to have that are marked by you displaying your greatest physical flaw to everyone who can see you Morgan?'

Morgan sighed and raised his hands in a placatory gesture. 'Ok, but I assume this date went well?' He said.

Reid was quiet for a moment. 'It was wonderful.' He whispered as he fidgeted with his fingers.

Morgan smiled at Reid's simple, gentlemanly description. 'So it's likely that she'll want a replay of this date?' Morgan asked gently.

Reid swallowed, hard. 'I would...well; I would like to hope that she might want to do it again, yes.' He said, shyly.

Morgan surveyed the man in front of him. His face was flushed and he was twisting his pen in his fingers so hard that it looked like he was about to snap it in half.

'So is it safe to assume that if you do go out on another date that you're going to do exactly the same thing and wind up in agony on your hallway floor again?' Morgan said.

Reid turned away from Morgan and flipped open the file he'd been working on.

'Kid, I'm not trying to make waves here, I just want you to take care of yourself.' Morgan said.

'I will.' Reid hissed.

'So tell Prentiss that you had a great time but next time you need to do a little less time on your feet.' Morgan pushed. 'She's a good person and, according to Garcia, she's _really_ into you, she won't care about it.'

Reid banged the file down on his desk. 'I care! Look, just...No. Morgan, this thing, it won't last. It'll be three, maybe four date's tops, so just please don't say anything to Emily; just...I want to have this Morgan, for those three or four dates, let me have this. Please.' Reid said.

'Who says it won't last?' Morgan said, shaking his head.

'I do. Past experience does.' Reid said flatly. 'Please don't say anything.'

Morgan fell silent for a couple of minutes.

'I won't say anything, but I think you're underestimating Prentiss, on more than one level kid.' Morgan said.

Morgan swivelled his chair back to his desk and picked up the top file on his stack. He drummed his fingers on it thoughtfully before turning back to Reid.

'Hey.' He said after a couple of minutes had passed.

'What?' Reid said.

'I want you to promise me something.'

Reid looked across at Morgan and raised his eyebrows. 'What?'

'Next time you nearly kill yourself trying to impress a girl, _call me_. I'll come scrape you up off the floor.' Morgan said.

* * *

'Good Morning.' Emily said as she slid into her chair three minutes before 9am.

'Cutting it fine Agent Prentiss.' Morgan joked.

'My hot water cut out on me and I had to spend twenty minutes wrapped in a towel and covered in soap fiddling with the heater. I so need to find a new place with a Super who actually fixes stuff.' Emily groused.

'Now that is definitely an image to chase away the Monday morning blues.' Morgan raised his eyebrows and grinned.

'Eww!' Emily complained.

'Eww nothing. Don't you agree kid?' Morgan threw a screwed up ball of paper at Reid.

'What?' Reid mumbled as he looked up from his files.

Morgan laughed at Reid's blushing face. 'Don't "_what_" me. You're beet red Reid, beet red.'

Emily pulled off her jacket and stood up. 'If you've both quite finished objectifying me, I'll go get some coffee.' Emily smiled sweetly and headed for the break room.

* * *

Emily had just filled her mug when Reid stepped into the break room, his flask dangling from his wrist.

'Morning.' Emily smiled.

'I wasn't objectifying you, Emily, I wouldn't ever do that.' Reid said, his face flushed.

'Never?' Emily said, smirking as Reid flushed again. 'I was kidding. Morgan was being his usual gross self but you blushed rather sweetly Dr Reid.' She waved the pot at Reid. 'Give me your flask.'

Reid handed the flask to Emily and suppressed a smile.

'What?' Emily said.

'Nothing, I just... I had a good time on Saturday.' He said.

Emily smiled widely. 'So did I. I loved the Planetarium. That was definitely my favourite part.' She said. 'So how about you, what was your favourite part?'

'Well, I've seen the exhibition more times than I can count, so...' Reid cleared his throat a couple of times before continuing. 'For me it was the new bit, at the end.' He said.

'The Lockheed?' Emily said, frowning.

'The car.' He said.

'Did I have my eyes closed during some part of the day? We were in "Air and Space", right? No cars, genius.' Emily said, looking puzzled.

'_My car_, when you kissed me, in my car. That bit was definitely new. Well, for me anyway.' He said smiling briefly.

Emily fumbled with Reid's flask and spilled coffee on the worktop. 'Dammit.' She hissed. 'I'm glad you brought it up, the car I mean, I... Um... I wanted to discuss our second date.'

'You did?' Reid said, his voice squeaking, much to his embarrassment.

'Yeah. About the Smithsonian, well, I kind of wondered if we could pass.' She said.

Reid could feel his face heating up and his stomach sink with disappointment. 'Oh, of course, that's... it's ok, you don't have to...'

'I don't mean pass all together, there was just something else I wanted to do and wondered if you wanted to go with me.' She said. 'One of the local theatres is showing the original, unedited version of Solaris tonight, but it _is_ in Russian and it _is_ long, so, I understand if you want to pass.' She said quickly.

'I can speak Russian.' Reid said dumbly.

'Is that a yes?' Emily laughed.

'Yes. It's a yes.' Reid replied. 'If there's no case.'

'If there's no case.' Emily agreed.

* * *

Emily wasn't sure how she felt about the concept of luck. She didn't consider herself to be overly blessed with it or totally devoid of it, it was just that nothing in her life had been significant enough one way or the other to be attributed to it. What had happened today might make her change her view though, she thought to herself, as she stood outside her local movie theatre waiting for Reid. As soon as Reid had uttered the words "_if there's no case_" she was convinced that one would come up. She waited all day for JJ to spin through the bullpen dropping new files on everyone's desk and for Hotch to say "_Wheels up in thirty minutes_", but it didn't happen and Emily Prentiss was left waiting for Reid outside a movie theatre and re-evaluating her stand point on the concept of luck.

She had wanted to see this movie as soon as she heard about the showing, but doubted that she would actually go. Firstly, cases tended to interrupt everything, secondly, she hated the idea of buying a single ticket, doing so would land her firmly in the loser club, and thirdly, she didn't really want to admit to herself or anyone else, that she was excited at the thought of going to see a five hour long, Russian, meditative psychological drama. That would land her firmly in the geek club.

It was only during their date to the Smithsonian, where Reid had spent a moment reading a display of Yuri Gagarin's letters, and _not_ the English translation next to it, that she realised he could read Russian and that she might just have found someone to go with, someone who was already a card carrying member of the geek club.

"_So_", she thought, _"two lucky things, no case and I met someone who understands Russian." _

A small group of people stepped around her and made their way up the theatre steps. As they parted around her Emily saw Reid standing right in front of her. She guessed he hadn't seen her from the way he was looking around.

'Reid!' She called. He turned around, his eyes searching the steps. When he saw her he smiled, a rare, full on smile.

"_Three lucky things." _Emily thought, as her breath caught in her throat. _"No case, someone who understands Russian, and someone who smiles like that."_

* * *

It was midnight by the time the movie had finished, but despite the lateness of the hour Emily felt wide awake. It could have been because Reid was hyper from either the film or the copious amount of candy he had consumed and was talking a million miles an hour extolling the virtues of Science Fiction.

They had decided to get coffee and pie from the diner at the end of the block. They had both left their cars at that end of the street and neither felt like going home yet. It was only a five minute walk and although the night had turned cool it was clear and dry and Emily couldn't help but feel like a sixteen year old on her first date. She loved hearing Reid talk. It didn't really matter what the subject was, although Sci-Fi was better than serial killers, she just enjoyed the timbre of his voice, all the inflections and the way his tone raised in pitch when he was speaking about a topic that excited him. She was so engrossed in listening and so relaxed that when she threaded her arm through his she hadn't really thought about the logistics of her actions.

Reid's step faltered and she felt his arm stiffen.

'Oh, sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't think...' She said quickly as she pulled her arm back, the silence stretching out a beat too long to be comfortable.

Finally Reid cleared his throat and angled his arm outwards towards her, his hand still gripping the top of his cane.

'No, don't apologise, really, I just need a little warning.' He quirked a small smile at her. 'No one's ever tried to do that before, it just threw my stride a little.'

Emily's chest swelled with a sudden rush of affection for the man in front of her and she lopped her arm loosely through his. 'I promise not to run.' She said.

He let out a small laugh. 'So do I.'

* * *

'Did you know that the first recorded recipe for apple pie dates back to the fourteenth century?' Reid said as Emily enjoyed a mouth full of apples. She shook her head at him and closed her eyes in order to fully savour her moment of bliss.

'I take it apple is your favourite.' Reid laughed.

'Mhhhm' Emily nodded again.

'Originally pies were not made with sugar as it was too expensive and the crust, commonly called a "_coffin_", was not meant to be eaten. It merely served as a container to cook the fruit and spices in.' Reid said.

Emily stopped twirling the spoon in her mouth. 'Did you just manage to connect apple pie with death?'

'No.' Reid said, frowning.

'You said the word "coffin." Emily said flatly.

'That's what they called the crust in the fourteenth century. It's just terminology Emily.' Reid said.

'I don't like it connected to my favourite pie.' She laughed. 'And how do you even know that? I know you have a photographic...'

'Eidetic.' Reid interrupted.

'Eidetic memory, but seriously, what were you reading, "Pie Making for ye olde dummies"?' Emily said.

Reid smiled. 'Its actual title is "The Forme of Curye" by Samuel Pegge and was compiled in 1390 AD by the master cooks of Richard the Second of England. When you can read most books in under ten minutes you find that you get through a lot of books.' He said.

Emily smiled and went back to her pie as Reid went back to his. 'So, your favourite is cherry then?' She said.

'Absolutely.' He said. 'It's sweeter than apple.'

'And it's all about the sugar with you Dr Reid, isn't it.' Emily teased as she pushed away her empty plate and the visual of Reid slowly licking his spoon.

Reid blushed and fidgeted in his seat. 'I have a sweet tooth.' He agreed, unable to break eye contact with her as she smiled at him. She had the brightest eyes he had ever seen and her smiling over at him was making his heart race uncomfortably.

'So...' Emily started. 'Should we talk about this.' She said, waving her hand between them.

'This?' Reid repeated.

'Yeah. This.' Emily said. 'I know we're only at date two but, well, we do work together and ... Have you given this some thought too?'

'Thought about what?' He asked, clearly confused.

'About if this goes somewhere, about how we need ground rules when we're working and how to keep it professional.' She said.

'No. I didn't expect ...Um..No. I haven't thought about it at all.' He said.

'Oh.' Emily flushed. 'I've never dated someone I've worked with before, I just need to know that we, _us dating_, won't compromise what we do.'

'Dating?' Reid repeated weakly.

'You don't want to?' Emily said, picking up on the note of panic in his voice.

'No! I mean, yes I do...but...what I mean is...this isn't how this usually goes.' Reid finished lamely.

Emily reached across the table and took his hand in hers. 'I'd just like to see _where_ this goes. Two dates, twelve dates, whatever, I want to give it a try, but only if you do too.' She said.

Reid nodded. 'I do.' He said.

Emily gazed at him, her expression serious. 'Then smile Spencer, you look like I just killed your puppy.' She said.

Reid looked across at Emily as she leaned over to him. She held his gaze and at that moment Reid felt as though everything stopped, the cars on the street, the murmur of the other patrons in the diner, the background music from the radio, everything, until he leaned in toward her, took her face in his hands and pressed his lips against hers.

* * *

Aaron Hotchner had finally removed his tie at eleven thirty that evening. He had stayed in the office until ten and then resignedly made his way back to his new apartment with a stack of paper work under his arm.

He had always worked hard but now that Haley and Jack were gone he worked even harder. If he kept himself immersed in his job he wouldn't have to think about Haley's not so secret affair and how he now only got to visit his son on weekends.

After doing a further hour of paperwork Hotch finally loosened his tie, poured himself a scotch and sat down on the end of his bed. He surveyed the packing boxes that crowded the room. Raising his glass he wryly toasted his new single life. Knocking the drink back he lay on the bed and balanced the empty glass on his stomach.

'At least I don't have to listen to you snore anymore.' He said to his absent wife. Closing his eyes he tried not to think about his son. He was doing so quite unsuccessfully when the phone rang.

'Hotchner.'

'I need a lawyer. Do you do divorces?' A voice said.

Hotch's face broke into a smile. 'I told you the first three times, I'm not that type of lawyer.'

'Right. How the hell are you Aaron.' David Rossi asked his old friend.

'Good. Tired, and a man down at work, but good.' Hotch said.

'You can't lie to a profiler Aaron, even over the phone. Anyway, I'm about to make your employee issues resolve themselves.' Rossi said.

'You're joking, right?' Hotch said.

'Have you ever known me to joke about things Aaron?'

'Only your wives.' Hotch laughed. 'You're really coming back?'

'Really.' Dave replied.

'You must be insane. The hours, the things we see. It's very different now Dave.' Hotch said.

'What's different.' Dave replied. 'We catch the bad guys, we put them away. Same old Aaron, same old.'

'On the level now Dave, why? Why would you want this? You're more than comfortable. You have your writing and your signings. I'm happy about it, but I don't understand it.' Hotch said.

'What's to understand? I'm bored and I have more to give.' Rossi said.

Hotch was silent for a moment. 'Right. You do know that you can't lie to a profiler, even over the phone.' Hotch heard Dave laugh. 'We shouldn't make Strauss aware that we've already spoken.' Hotch continued.

'True. We'll do all that "_how long has it been_" bullshit, don't worry.' Dave said.

'I'm worried already.' Hotch replied.

**CMCM**


	12. Chapter 12

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

**Some bad language in this chapter and one very mild adult situation.**

**Chapter Twelve**

**The Consultant**

The bullpen was quiet and dark, save for a couple of desk lamps left burning. The team had just got back from a gruelling case in Iowa where the partial remains of several young women had turned up at an industrial incinerator plant. The whole place had been shut down immediately but it was only when the local ME pointed out to the LEO's that they had parts from more than one body, but not enough matching parts to make one genetically complete body, that they called in the FBI.

The case had taken them a week to crack and left each team member with so much paperwork to catch up on that all of them were feeling the strain. The jet had landed at a little after eight that evening but the whole team had opted to go back to Quantico to get a jump on the case summaries.

It was now after ten. Hotch was shut away in his office with JJ, leaving Morgan, Reid and Emily at their desks.

'We do _not_ get paid enough for this.' Morgan groaned as he dropped a dead sharpie into the waste paper basket. 'Throw me a pen, kid. I used all my ink on this one psycho.'

'I thought we agreed he was a sociopath.' Reid said, looking worriedly down at his notes.

Morgan groaned. 'Figure of speech Reid, that's all'

Reid blinked back at him.

'Yes, Dr Reid, you are correct, the Unsub is a sociopath.' Morgan said seriously.

Reid went back to his notes, his head bent close to the page.

'No wonder you have to wear those coke bottle glasses, kid.' Morgan teased.

Reid ignored him and carried on with his work.

'Seriously, you could get contacts you know. It's like partnering Mr Magoo over here.' Morgan said.

'Morgan, if you're bored why not go home.' Reid said, not taking his eyes from the file.

I'm not bored kid in fact I'm just starting to have a little fun.' Morgan smiled as he stretched out in his chair.

'You should try being a consultant.' Reid replied.

Morgan stopped swinging in his chair and stared at Reid. 'What does that gotta do with your glasses?'

'It has nothing to do with my glasses. I was referring back to your comment about not getting paid enough. You should consider consulting. It's very lucrative.' Reid said as he put the cap on his pen and fixed Morgan with an innocent look.

'Son of a ... are you telling me that you get paid more than I do?' Morgan said, incredulously. 'Emily did you hear ...'

'She went to get coffee.' Reid said, nodding toward Emily's empty desk. 'And I can't possibly say that I get paid more than you, because I don't know what you get paid Morgan, I'm simply pointing out that consultancy pays well.' Reid said.

'Like hell you are...' Morgan said.

Reid smirked at Morgan as he grabbed his canes and pushed himself up from his desk. In less than a second Morgan's anger receded. 'You sneaky little...' Morgan laughed as he noted Reid's smirk.

'I think I'm getting the hang of this friendship thing Morgan. You tease me, I tease you back. I think it's called reciprocity.' Reid said. 'I'm going to see what's keeping Emily. She's been in the break room long enough to make three pots of coffee.'

'Yeah, you do that kid.' Morgan called after him, shaking his head.

* * *

Emily felt wiped out. All she wanted to do was go home and go to bed with a large slice of the frozen lemon dessert that she knew was hiding at the bottom of her freezer and not think about Maddox Hammond who had spent the last two years trying to construct the perfect woman in the style of Dr Frankenstein. Before this case she thought she'd seen it all. She was wrong.

She consoled herself with knowing that Hammond's sewing days were over the minute he resisted arrest and Morgan gave him an extra hole in his head. Whilst her soul warred with the fact that she was happy over a human being's death, her heart and mind knew that the Unsub being dead was the best outcome in the end.

She groaned as she entered the break room and saw the coffee pot was only housing a dried ring of dregs and no liquid. She set about the task of cleaning the pot and fixing a new one. Standing at the counter she rolled her head and flexed her shoulders as the pot plopped and bubbled into life. She was rubbing the back of her neck and deep breathing when she felt hands tighten on her shoulders.

'The ladies tell me that I give one hell of a back rub Agent Prentiss.' Agent Brett McManus said.

Emily's muscles tensed and she bit back a groan of disgust. Turning she shrugged the White Collar Agent's hands from her body.

'Agent McManus. It's after five thirty and yet you're still here. You get locked in?' She quipped.

'Funny. No, not locked in sweetheart, just very busy doing the mop up on a laundering case. Some dumb bitch thought she could use her Government funded company as a front and get it past me. She really was one stupid piece of skirt.' McManus said.

'You have such a charming way with words, McManus.' Emily replied.

McManus leaned closer to her as he reached for a bottle of water. 'What can I say, Prentiss. I've always been a cunning linguist.' He winked at her and grinned.

Emily shuddered inwardly at McManus's double entendre.

'So, about that shoulder rub...' He started.

'Never gonna happen McManus. Never.' She smiled.

'Oh come on. We both know that I'm a catch Emily, and really, looking at who you have around you all day, you could do worse.' McManus held up his hand and started counting Emily's team mates off on his fingers. 'You got the boss man who, between the job and that frosty piece he calls a wife, is virtually married twice over, Morgan, whose been around the block a few, and Parking Permit.'

'Parking Permit?' Emily repeated.

'The gimpy kid, whatever you call him. It's a no brainer Agent. You think it over.' McManus grinned and stepped out of the break room, leaving Emily's verbal chastisement over his cruel reference to Reid dying on her lips.

She dumped herself down in one of the hard chairs that circled the small round table and sighed. She felt overwhelmingly tired and more than a little ill equipped to deal with slime like McManus at this late hour, especially after a week and a half of dealing with sociopathic slime. Leaning forward she rested her head in the cradle of her arms and listened to the therapeutic dripping of the coffee pot and the reassuring whoosh of her heart in her ears. Her eyelids drooped as she mentally promised herself just five minutes of shut eye while the coffee fixed its self.

* * *

When Reid stepped into the break room he smelled the fresh coffee and saw Emily asleep at the table, her head resting on her folded arms. Her hair was fanned out across the Formica with a few strands grazing her cheek. Every time she breathed the strands of hair moved and settled in a different place.

Reid loved the colour of Emily's hair. It was one of the first things he'd noticed about her, along with her smile. The colour was so deep and dark that when the light hit it looked like a slick of polished jet. Sometimes when Reid looked at her all he wanted to do was run his fingers through it. He was pretty sure though that doing that here would definitely contravene their agreed rules about keeping things professional. Besides, Reid thought wryly to himself, he was hardly smooth when it came to women. He might be able to imagine himself masterfully teasing her hair as she gazed up at him but in reality he was no Derek Morgan and he knew it. He wasn't graceful, he didn't read subtle, social hints well and he never knew the right time to kiss a girl or the right words to say afterwards. As a teenager he had hoped it would just come to him when he got older, his mother had promised him that it would, but as time wore on he began to doubt that he'd ever be any different than the awkward, nervous kid he'd been back in high school.

Sitting down quietly next to Emily, Reid wondered whether or not to wake her. She was obviously tired, they all were and with stacks of files to get through they were probably looking at a late night, but if she was tired enough to fall asleep at work then she was beyond being productive.

Leaning forward he tentatively brushed a strand of silky hair from her cheek and softly called her name.

* * *

Emily smelled the fresh coffee and felt fingertips brush her face. Jerking awake she grabbed at the hand hovering above her head and curled her fingers tightly around the wrist.

'McManus, I swear to god if you touch me again, you'll lose the fingers you touch with.' She snapped.

'Ow! Ow, Emily it's me.' Reid squeaked as the hold on his wrist tightened.

'Oh god, I am so sorry. Did I hurt you?' Emily asked.

'It was oddly reminiscent of the Chinese burns Bethany Carter used to give me in junior high.' Reid said as he shook his hand and winced.

'I really didn't know it was you. I am _so_ sorry.' Emily said taking his hand gently and prodding at his reddening wrist.

Reid looked at her intently. 'You thought I was McManus. Why?' He said.

Emily shrugged his words off. 'It's nothing. He's just a bit of a louse.'

'Did he do something?' Reid asked.

'Nothing I couldn't handle. All better?' She asked as she kissed the inside of his wrist lightly, making his stomach flutter.

Reid flashed a small smile. 'Once I have my coffee it will be, and at least now I know not to sneak up on you while you're sleeping, unless I actually _want_ you to go all Lord Vader on me, that is.'

'I did not go _Vader_ on you at all. I'm just tired and a little wired and ... sick of waiting for coffee around here!' She grumbled.

'You're too tired to be productive any more tonight. I could give you a ride home. You shouldn't drive when you're overly tired it's proven to be the equivalent of operating a vehicle with a point oh two blood alcohol level.' Reid said.

'My apartment is out of your way.' Emily argued.

'I can turn around when I drop you off.' Reid countered.

'You're tired as well.' She said.

'Not as tired as you are. You did two consecutive nights on the stake out whilst I was at the hotel sleeping.' Reid replied.

'Yeah, after you did a straight twenty hours figuring out the coding in Hammond's journals and the patterns left on victim two's skin.' Emily said.

Reid sighed. 'At this moment in time I am marginally more rested than you. Please, Emily, let me take you home.'

* * *

Reid studied the books on the shelves in Emily's lounge room whilst she made better coffee than the pot they had left behind at the BAU. He hadn't anticipated Emily inviting him in and he'd anticipated accepting even less. Now that he _was_ in her apartment he was very unsure what he was supposed to do. It wasn't a scenario that had ever presented itself to him before. His relationships never went past date four and date's one through four had never taken place in any ones apartment.

It didn't happen to him very often but Reid suddenly felt out of his depth. He had been waiting for it to happen but so far he hadn't noticed any cooling off from Emily. He'd felt sure that after their trip to the museum and then the movies that she would stop suggesting meeting up but she still seemed eager to get lunch with him at work and tell him about the things she was interested in and now she had invited him into her home, for coffee. Normally Reid loved coffee but this particular cup was making him feel exceedingly panicked. He knew, even with his limited social experience, that sometime coffee didn't mean coffee, sometimes coffee meant sex.

'Oh god.' He muttered to himself. His stomach flipped and he felt a weight descend on his chest. What if that was what she wanted and he was some bumbling idiot who had just looked at her expectantly until she'd actually gone to the kitchen to fix a pot. Should he go to her, should he try to make the first move? Even thinking about it made his throat tighten. He had no idea what the first move should be in this situation, and if he did make it and she had only meant _coffee_ coffee not _sex_ coffee what would she think of him? Leaning one of his canes and his shoulder against the shelves he pulled at his tie and tried to take a breath that didn't just begin and end in his upper chest.

'Are you ok?' Emily said making Reid jump. 'You look kind of pale.'

'What? No, I'm good, really. Just ... thirsty.' Reid said as he took hold of his cane and moved to the huge couch.

Emily set two mugs of coffee on the table and sat cross legged next to Reid.

'Thanks for coming up. I know you must be tired, it's just...' Emily faltered. 'Some of our cases, they've been really hard to shake recently and it's this part, the coming home, to an empty place, it leaves too much opportunity for your head to fill with everything you've spent the last few days seeing and doing.'

Reid cleared his throat. 'Have you tried any meditative therapy?'

'I've tried extensive food therapy, does that count?' Emily said, laughing.

Reid frowned. 'Food therapy?' He said seriously.

Emily rolled her eyes. 'I take ice cream to bed. Disgusting, I know.'

Understanding dawned on Reid and he smiled back at her. 'Could be worse. I prefer Rice Krispie bars or popcorn.'

'Now _that_ is a cute image to have in my head, you eating popcorn in bed.' Emily teased.

Reid flushed and fumbled his cup slightly.

'Relax. I don't have food therapy on the third date. I'm not that kind of girl, doctor.' Emily teased.

Reid felt his mouth dry. They were at the third date.

* * *

As the coffee cooled Emily went to change and re-appeared dressed in slouchy sweats with her hair tied loosely back.

'You found the remote.' She said nodding toward the flat screen TV.

'Sorry, I thought you'd be longer.' He flushed and fumbled with the off button.

'No leave it, is this season one?' Emily asked.

'Three.' Reid replied. 'It's called The Trouble with Tribbles. It's my favourite episode.'

'I never understood the appeal of Captain Kirk to all those women.' Emily said as she sipped her coffee and settled into the couch.

'He's the archetypal alpha male. In social animals, the alpha is the individual in the community with the highest rank. The term "alpha male" when applied to humans refers to a man who is powerful through his courage and a competitive, goal-driven, "take charge" attitude. Nature genetically encodes females to seek him out as the most desirable mate to sire their offspring.' Reid said as he nursed his own cup and stared at the screen intently.

'Forget the alpha male, Spock has it all going on if you ask me.' Emily said as she took another mouthful of coffee.

* * *

The side of Emily's face felt hot and her nose tickled. Blearily she tried to rouse herself, swiping absently at the thread of drool that was escaping the corner of her mouth...all over Dr Spencer Reid's deep blue woollen sweater vest.

She blinked, wondering exactly when she had fallen asleep. The TV was still playing Star Trek but that meant nothing. It was one of those Sci-Fi stations that played episodes back to back all night so it could be midnight or it could be 4am for all she knew.

Her waking caused Reid to stir a little and Emily to take stock of her position. She was nestled into Reid's side, his arm casually wrapped around her shoulders, her head resting on his chest. Looking up she saw that he, like her, had fallen asleep.

Often, when in the office, she had the urge to stare at him, take stock and map his face in her minds' eye, but she never got the chance. Staring for too long would get them noticed and make him feel uncomfortable. Now she had the chance she was going to take it. Leaning back a little she studied him. His delicately sculpted face reminded her of something but she couldn't place it at first but after a few moments taking in the angles of his jaw, the sharp planes of his cheekbones and the warm, full blush of his lower lip she realised what it was. He reminded her of Italy, more specifically the art that she had seen when she was a girl back in Italy. He was the embodiment of a renaissance angel, if angels came in sweater vests and thick glasses.

Reaching up she traced the side of his face and down his neck with the palm of her hand, so lost in what she was doing that she didn't realised that he had woken up until he pulled her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her open palm.

'I fell asleep.' Emily said.

'Me too. I never fall asleep on the couch at home.' Reid said.

Emily swallowed. 'We must have been too comfortable.' She said, her chest tightening as she realised that he still held her hand to his lips. Leaning forward she pulled her hand out of his grasp and pressed her mouth against his.

For a moment he didn't react and Emily moved back slightly, unsure of herself, but then she felt his hand on her back and she pushed herself into him, her fingers knotting in his hair, as she inhaled the strong scent of coffee from his lips and deepened the kiss.

Reid felt as though every single nerve ending terminated where she touched him, the weight of her body on his chest making his heart race and his hands press her harder into him. He hardly felt his vertebrae protest at the short sleep on the unsupportive couch or the weight of another person upon him, all he felt was Emily, beautiful, thrilling Emily.

He was amazed at how right it felt when she filled his mouth with her tongue. Whenever he had kissed a girl before and that had happened it always threw him, set his mind racing at the implications of how far and how fast things would go and once his mind took over his body always, _always_ faltered and failed him. With Emily his mind didn't have a voice. All he could do was feel.

He didn't question when his own tongue met hers or when his hand slipped beneath her soft shirt or when his fingers traced the groove of her spine and met the clasp of her bra.

He came back to himself when Emily let out a soft gasp of breathlessness and stilled her hands in his hair. At that point he realised two things; Firstly, he had moved his hand from Emily's back to her front and was cradling her left breast, his fingers slipping beneath the soft lace of her bra, his thumb tracing the hardness of her nipple. Secondly, he was hard beneath Emily's hip.

* * *

It was a typically warm Vegas night as Harper Rawlins turned off the moonlit sidewalk and walked up the shadowed path leading to her front door. The flags needed weeding and the lawn still wasn't cut.

'Geez Mike, what in hell have you been doing all day?' She muttered under her breath as she felt around in her oversized purse for her key. 'Probably drinking my pay check away.'

She was in no mood tonight. She'd had Alexa on the phone for most of her journey home bitching about her crappy job at Bennington and that her latest boyfriend had bailed and taken her TV with him. It wasn't that she didn't care about her friend but she had her own set of problems. She had her equally cruddy job at Branton's Motel where she cleaned room after ho's, philandering suits and packs of boys on stag weekends and a couple of other nights she tended the coffee bar at the local ice skating rink, which was better but more depressing in its own way.

Watching the high schoolers roll in on Friday and Saturday nights, the cheerleaders still in their uniforms and wearing their beau's letterman jackets, made her heart yearn for her youth to be back in her hands. She wasn't old, she was only thirty one, but she felt as though she were ninety one some days and just seeing those kids with all their potential ahead of them made her want to weep. It made her want to be Harper Hillman again, Harper Hillman, cheerleader, drama club president and prom queen.

She found her key and slid it into the lock. 'Welcome home Harper Hillman, motel cleaner and part time barista.' She said to herself. When an unbidden part of her brain whispered "_and_ _child abuser"_ as an addition to her list she squeezed her eyes shut and closed the door behind her.

'I'm home.' She called out as she dropped her bag on the floor and made her way to the bedroom.

Mike was already in bed, stretched out, half naked and watching the game on the huge TV he had insisted they put in the room. He reached out as she moved past the bed and pulled her down on top of him.

'Mike!' She whined. 'I need a shower, and sleep.'

'You need to relax, and what better way, honey. I'll even turn the game down.' He tried to kiss her and she twisted away.

'I need to shower.' She said.

'And after your shower?' Mike asked.

'I don't know Mike. I'm kind of beat.'

He let go of her wrist and flopped back onto the bed. 'Of course you are. You know you're never gonna get pregnant at this rate, and it's all you go on about.' He complained.

'I do not "go on" Mike.' She shook her head and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling off her shoes.

'You do. And I bet you "go on" to your fucking girlfriends, well I don't want them thinkin' it's me that can't perform, you hear me?' He rolled out of bed and grabbed a sweatshirt.

'They don't think it's your fault, _I_ don't think it's your fault. We've been trying for years, it's just not to be.' She said sadly. 'I'd make a terrible mother anyway.'

Mike pulled the shirt over his head and rolled his eyes.

'I'm not having this conversation again woman.'

'It's god.' She said simply.

'I said, I'm not having this conversation again. He snapped.

'It's punishment.' She replied, hardly listening to him.

The room was silent for a second before Mike lunged forward and violently swept a dozen or so knick-knacks and bits of jewellery from the night stand.

'Let it go! Just let it fucking go! You do _nothing_, _we_ do nothing, hell, we don't even have sex anymore and it's all because of him! How the hell did fucking Spencer fucking nervous wreck Reid ruin my life, _my_ life Harper! The kid who peed his pants in gym class, the kid who Janey Miller could beat up when she was only nine...dammit!' Mike Rawlins, ex high school quarterback, sat heavily on the bed and shook his head. 'I'm goin' out. Clean this mess up and get some sleep. I'll be back late.

* * *

Emily leaned back and took a deep breath, her gaze still fixed on Spencer's. He was blushing, deeply, and trying to move back from her but the corner of the couch left him nowhere to move back to.

'I am so sorry Emily.' He breathed.

'Sorry for what?' She said as she attempted to smooth his tousled hair. Reid squirmed and she sat back.

'For my...um...reaction. I'm really sorry, and you're so nice and it feels a little...um...well, impolite.' He muttered.

'_Impolite_? Spencer, I've never met an erection that _was_ polite.' Emily said, her face breaking into a teasing smile.

Reid glowered at her. 'You're laughing at me.' He said.

Emily tugged his hand to her lips and pressed a kiss to his open palm. 'Yes Spencer, I'm laughing at you, but only a little.'

Reid tried very hard to keep glowering at her but eventually his lips quirked into a very small smile.

'Honestly, I'd be a little offended if I didn't have that effect on you.' Emily said. 'It's rather flattering.' She moved her hand down and gently brushed the back of it over his groin, the soft fabric of his corduroy pants making her skin tingle.

'I should go, I don't want to but I think I should.' Reid said, his voice breaking much to his annoyance.

Emily nodded. 'You have no idea how much I want to disagree but, I think we could have something here, I'm not sure, but I _think_ we could, and I want it to be right.' Emily looked down, breaking her gaze with Reid. 'There have been times... relationships I've had in the past...they... I didn't allow them time enough to be special, or the respect to be special even, and I don't want to make the same mistake with you.' She squeezed his hand and Spencer squeezed back. Smiling she knelt up and leaned into him, drawing him into her arms she held him tight.

**CMCM**


	13. Chapter 13

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

**Some dialog taken from S3;E6**

**I can't give thanks enough for all your alerts, favourites and reviews.**

**Chapter Thirteen**

**The Consultant**

Emily stared at Spencer from the cover of JJ's office doorway. Cradling a warm coffee cup in her hand and a file under her arm, she watched as he turned in his chair to take a file from Morgan, rolling his eyes at whatever exchange they had before returning to his stack of consults. She smiled as she noticed him hiding a smirk when Morgan threw a wadded up sheet of paper at him.

'Are you actually going to pass me that file or were you just giving it the grand tour?' JJ said from within her office.

Dragging her eyes away from the object of her studies Emily stepped into the office.

'What are you looking at, or should I say _who_ are you looking at?' JJ said as she continued to write.

Emily slid onto the corner of JJ's desk and dropped the file. 'Just thinking.' She replied.

'About?' JJ said patiently.

'Reid.' Emily said, trying to sound casual.

JJ laid her pen down. 'Well, you already have a seat...on my expenses report...' She scowled and pulled a sheet of creased paper from beneath Emily's ass. 'So why don't you tell me all about it.'

'I was just thinking about how short a time it is that he's been here, yet I can't remember what it was like when he _wasn't_ here.' Emily said.

'Aww, it's so cute.' JJ teased.

'I didn't mean like that, I meant in relation to the team. He's been here what, six months now, and he fits, he just _fits_ and no one else has ever done that, not Elle or Jordan, and definitely not the cadets who've cycled in and out.' She said.

'Well some of those guys were spectacularly bad.' JJ said.

'Agreed, but still, they were on their way to becoming full agents and Elle and Jordan had clocked the years, they had the experience as well as the moves, they _should_ have worked out.' Emily said.

'And Reid shouldn't?' JJ said.

Emily shook her head. 'I just never anticipated Spencer being the one we've been waiting for. He doesn't fit the profile.' She moved from JJ's desk and back to the doorway.

'And we're definitely still talking about the team here?' JJ asked.

'Hmm.' Emily said, clearly distracted.

'Emily.' JJ pressed.

Emily turned back to her friend and was quiet for a moment. 'Things got pretty intense between us the other night.'

'And?' JJ said.

Emily rolled her eyes and blew out the breath she hadn't realised she was holding. 'Spencer gave me a ride home, he came up and had coffee and things progressed a little, and it was all there, we could have...normally I would have, but...'

'But?' JJ pressed.

'Half of me, no, _most_ of me didn't want to rush things and wreck it all but a small part of me...didn't want to _start_ things at all.' Emily said.

'Why not?' JJ asked, her brow furrowed. 'I thought you liked him?'

'I do, I _really_ do but I keep trying to come up with the reasons _why_ and I can't.' Emily said.

'How about he's cute, he's off the chart intelligent, he has a steady job and he's not a psychopath.' JJ said.

Emily smiled. 'I know all that but this tiny, tiny part of me questions why I find him so attractive. He's the complete opposite of all my past partners, both physically and intellectually. I know how I feel JJ but this one tiny part, it won't shut up.'

'Then I have some advice for you, that tiny part, ignore it.' JJ said seriously. 'If the greater part of you thinks you could have something then take it Emily, don't question it or dissect its meaning, just take it, because all those other partners, the ones that were nothing like him, well they didn't work out did they.'

Emily was silent for a while. 'No they didn't work out but as my grandmother used to say, ninety nine percent of dating has to fail in order for you to meet the one person you're supposed to be with.' Emily smiled.

'Wise lady.' JJ said.

'Thanks Jayje, for listening to me rambling.' Emily said.

'No problem, oh and about the sex, just do it already.' JJ said as she picked her pen back up. 'And be sure to report back and tell me all about it when you do.'

'We've only been on three dates JJ.' Emily said.

'What and you're not that kind of girl?' JJ questioned, her eyebrows raised.

Emily smirked at her. 'All joking aside, I want this to be different. I want it to be something I look back on and cherish, not just the sex, but all of it, whatever it turns out to be, however long it happens to last.' Emily got up and moved back to JJ's doorway, watching Reid as he stood and looped his flask around his wrist. He steadied his canes and Emily frowned as she witnessed a brief flash of pain cross his face for a second, disappearing behind a quick smile the moment Hotch appeared at his desk.

* * *

'Do we have a case?' Morgan asked as he sat in his usual chair at the round table.

Hotch had gathered everyone but the absence of case files being handed out made the team cast each other questioning looks.

'No case.' Hotch said as he sat down. 'You may be aware that since Gideon left I've been fighting our corner to get another Agent onto the team. I was advised a couple of days ago that the fight was successful.'

'A full Agent?' Morgan said. 'No cadets.'

'Definitely _not_ a cadet.' Hotch said.

'So you have someone in mind already?' Emily said.

'I have someone _hired_ already.' Hotch said. 'David Rossi.'

Morgan's brows rose. 'Rossi?'

'_The_ David Rossi?' Reid squeaked. 'One of the founders of the original BSU, prolific author, the most recognised of his books being "Deviance" which was first published nine years ago. He's since followed that up with "Manhunt", "Frenzy" and latterly "Compulsion; Understanding Criminal Behaviour".'

'You gonna be bringing your copies in for him to sign kid or you just gonna have him autograph a photo? Morgan teased. 'Anyway, I thought he retired.'

'He did. He's coming out of retirement.' Hotch said. 'He'll make a good contribution Morgan. We couldn't have hoped for a better replacement for Gideon.'

Morgan held his hands up in a placatory gesture. 'No convincing needed Hotch, I'm on board, maybe not as much as fan girl over there, but I'm on board.' Morgan said as he nodded toward a smiling Spencer Reid.

'Good.' Hotch nodded. 'He's coming in tomorrow.'

* * *

Emily was tucking into her turkey on rye when she noticed that Reid wasn't eating.

'So, we have a whole half hour to spend together and not only are you not talking you're not eating either. Is everything ok?' She asked.

'Hmm?' Reid said.

'I said I was going to leave the bureau at the end of the month. I've decided to join a convent. In Italy.' Emily said.

'Right, yeah, that sounds...what?' Reid said as he finally held Emily's gaze.

'You're not listening and you haven't eaten any of your sandwich. We have a half hour before we need to be back and this place isn't exactly close to the office.' Emily said.

'I'm sorry, I'm a little distracted.' Reid said.

'About?' Emily suppressed a sigh. One thing she had noticed about Spencer was that often conversations with him didn't flow they way they did with most people. He seemed to miss the social rules of conversation, the nuances, the back and forth sharing of information that reinforced the bond between all parties involved. Nine times out of ten he failed to take the conversational doors that were opened for him.

'What?' Reid said.

'You said you felt distracted, I asked about what. This is the point that you share and I give you some sage advice and you feel better.' Emily said patiently.

'It is?' Reid said.

'Yes Spencer, it is.' Emily said.

Reid fidgeted in his seat and reached for more sugar for his coffee. 'I was thinking about David Rossi.' He said finally.

'Not good for a girl's ego. You're out on a date and you're thinking about David Rossi.' Emily said.

'This is a date?' Reid said, his voice squeaking. 'We just came out to get lunch. We're going back to work in a half hour.'

'It doesn't matter. It's just you and I which I class as date territory. Besides, we spend so much of our time on the clock that we'll never get past date three if don't include activities that happen within working hours.' She said.

'This is date four?' Reid said quickly.

'It is. And you're thinking about David Rossi. Why?' Emily said.

Reid flushed and fidgeted in his seat. 'I just... well, he's an icon in the field of profiling and it'll be such a privilege to meet him. I'm somewhat excited by the prospect, and somewhat nervous.'

'He's just a guy, Spencer, a regular guy, and you're a genius. Seriously, you have nothing to be nervous about.' Emily said.

'Yeah, he's just the guy who cracked the Scarsdale Skinner.' Reid said.

Emily dropped the remains of her sandwich. 'And thank you for putting me off lunch.' She said.

'Sorry.' Reid muttered.

Emily wiped her fingers and took Reid's hand. 'You will be fine. He's just another profiler, just like Gideon. You were fine with him, and now there's a man who can be intimidating, he intimidated the hell out of me on my first assignment with him. I distinctly remember a flight to Gitmo which was positively frosty.'

'Gideon's different. He got the watered down version of me before the full on me. He had time to acclimate.' Reid said.

'Acclimate? I don't understand.' Emily said.

'He was giving a series of lectures over the course of one semester. As a student body we were always in study groups so he didn't have to deal with me on a one to one basis at first, so he had time, you know...to get used to me.' Reid said.

'Why do you think that you need to be gotten used to?' Emily said.

'Emily, it's nice of you but you don't have to do that. I've been me for a long time, I know I can be a little hard to take. It takes time for certain people to react well to me. I just don't want Rossi to be put off immediately.' He said, biting his lip and swirling the dregs of his coffee.

Emily leaned forward and pressed a firm kiss to Spencer's lips before pulling him into an awkward but firm hug. 'Has anyone ever told you that you are a silly, silly boy?' She asked.

'No.' He replied, earnestly as she kissed him again.

* * *

'You ready for your hero, Reid?' Morgan teased the following morning as he dropped his jacket onto the back of his chair and passed Reid his cup of take out coffee. 'Did you manage to sleep last night or were you too excited?' He laughed.

'Ha ha!' Reid replied testily as he snatched up the coffee.

'Anyway, on to more important things, if we don't have a case how about we have a team night out tomorrow night? It's Friday and I think we need a little down time. I'll bet Garcia would be up for dancing and a couple of drinks. How about you guys?' Morgan said as he leaned back in his chair.

'It's Halloween.' Reid replied, shaking his head.

Emily looked up frowning. 'Halloween.' She said.

'Halloween.' Reid repeated excitedly. 'To paraphrase from Celtic Mythology tomorrow night is the night when the barriers between the natural and the supernatural are temporarily removed.'

'That's one night I can happily ignore. It creeps me out, grown folks in masks.'

'You're scared of Halloween?' Reid said, frowning.

'I didn't say I was scared, I said I was creeped out. There's a difference there youngster, you should look it up.' Morgan said.

'What creeps you out about it?' Emily asked.

'I don't know, people wearing masks. I don't like folks in disguises.' Morgan said.

'That's the best thing about Halloween. You can be anyone you want to be.' Reid said as he tossed a piece of Halloween candy onto Morgan's desk.

'Nah, I'm pretty good just being me.' Morgan said.

'Yeah, why is it that neither of those points of view surprises me.' Emily laughed.

'You know what though, on the flip side it does provide a pretty good reason to cosy up with a scary flick and a little Halloween Honey.' Morgan said as he winked at Emily.

'Eww, Halloween Honey, that's...now I'm creeped out.' Emily groaned.

Morgan laughed. 'So instead of bar hopping you're gonna what, go trick or treating?' He asked Reid.

'No. I was twelve the last time I actually went out but there are a few kids in my apartment complex and I like to hand out candy.' Reid replied.

'And I just bet that you dress up, mask and all.' Morgan said.

'I rarely utilise a mask actually.' Reid said as he sipped from his cup.

'What do you usually go as?' Emily asked.

'I try to change it each year. This year I was planning on going as Dr Niles Caulder.' Reid said as both Morgan and Emily gave him blank looks. 'Better known as The Chief, he was the leader of Doom Patrol and...guys, he's here!' Reid whispered as Strauss walked through the bullpen with the famous David Rossi in tow.

Emily turned in her chair as Rossi swept past, nodding his head and smiling slightly. Reid was frozen to the spot, his eyes wide. Leaning across her desk Emily tossed a scrunched up post-it at Reid's head. He dragged his awestruck gaze from Rossi's retreating back and frowned at her.

'What was that for?' He asked.

'You had a rabbit in the headlights look. Remember, he's not a myth Spencer he's just a man and believe me, when he sees what you can do he's going to be as eager to pick your brains you are to pick his.' Emily said smiling.

* * *

David Rossi was an ass, a complete ass.

Emily sat by the window in the jet and stared at the darkening sky, happy that it wasn't so dark yet that she could see her reflection in the small window. She didn't need to see her reflection to know that she was glaring. It just maddened her that she had to make do with glaring across the wing of the jet rather than at David Rossi. No, David Rossi was comfortably seated alone at the back of the jet making notes in that damn little black book of his, happily ignorant of the hurt he'd caused over the last two days.

At first Emily had thought he was OK. Yes, he was a bit of a loner but she decided that trait was born of the way he was used to working back in the day. Hotch had mentioned before that they used to go out on their own and work profiles on their own so it was no surprise that he wasn't an immediate team player. What was a surprise was how little time he had for the team after he'd seen how things worked now. He hadn't wanted to listen to them toss ideas around on the jet on the way out. Hotch had to ask him to come sit with them whilst they took their first look at the case files and the only time he made any contribution it was an exclamation of interest in something they had been saying but when Spencer had given him an opening to contribute he declined. The only other thing he'd done after that was poke fun at Spencer for still wearing his seatbelt.

'_If the jet goes down you think that'll make much difference?' Rossi said as he gestured toward Reid's lap._

Everyone on the team had noticed that Reid went through phases where he would keep his seatbelt on throughout entire flights and then, as if something unseen had magically happened, he would go through weeks of unbuckling it the exact second the lamp lit to say it was permitted. Everyone had noticed it but no one had questioned him on it.

_Reid floundered for a moment, his mouth open. 'Excuse me?'_

'_Your seatbelt. You scared of flying son?' Rossi asked, more than a little patronisingly._

_Reid's face reddened. 'I...um...no.' Reid slowly unclipped the belt and folded his hands in his lap._

A few minutes later, when Rossi stood and made his way to the bathroom no one commented when they heard the faint but unmistakable click of Reid's seatbelt fastening again.

Once they were on the ground and in Carollton, Texas with the LEO's, Rossi swung between being casually dismissive of Reid and staring at him whenever he was using his canes. He had been outwardly scathing about the jeopardy surface Reid created and between that and the staring disappointment and discomfort radiated from Reid so strongly that Emily could almost taste it mingling with her own anger.

By the time Rossi went lone wolf and goaded the Unsub over the phone about his impotency, driving him to threaten to kill his latest victim, Enid White, the jury was back and he was convicted of being an ass of the first degree as far as Emily Prentiss was concerned. Luckily for Rossi the Unsub, Max Pool, didn't kill Enid after his tirade. Lucky for the whole team really. Emily didn't want to think what Strauss might have done if he had.

Emily's thoughts were broken by someone placing a cup of steaming coffee on the table in front of her.

'Penny for your thoughts' JJ Said.

'They're not worth it.'' Emily smiled. 'Thanks for the coffee.'

'Rough couple of days.' JJ said.

'Yeah. Made rougher by one of own.' Emily said, her voice low.

JJ nodded and snuck a quick look back at Rossi who was still scribbling in his note book. 'What do you think he's writing in there?' She said.

'From the amount of time he's stared at him my guess would be Reid's inside leg measurement.' Emily said.

JJ smothered a laugh. 'I think he made a special section for Reid and Garcia. He seems equally thrown by both of them.'

'Ya think?' Emily replied. 'He could be a little less obvious. He's making Sp...Reid uncomfortable.'

'And you angry.' JJ said. 'Protective much?' She smirked.

Emily rolled her eyes. 'If it were anyone else on our team I'd still be angry but Reid was really excited about meeting him and he's closed him down at every opportunity. How much effort would it take to just be nice for five minutes? He's given time to Morgan and both you and Hotch and I certainly have no complaints over the way he's been with me. Granted he pretty much dangled Enid White's life by a thin thread but that wild card moment aside the only person he's been an ass with is Reid.' She whispered fiercely.

'Just give him time. Reid _can_ be formidable when you first meet him. Maybe he's unsure how to approach him.' JJ said.

Emily shot her an incredulous look.

'What. That could be it Emily. Intellectually Reid's formidable and you know it. It can be a little overwhelming.' JJ said. 'And he's not the only rocky start. Morgan and Reid didn't exactly gel and you didn't go all mother bear then.'

'Mother bear!' Emily hissed. 'You didn't just call me a mother bear?'

JJ stifled a laugh. 'I did, because that's exactly what you are. Protective. It's kind of sweet. How does the song go, "_Emily and Spencer sitting in a tree"_...' She sang.

Emily arched her eyebrows. 'Maybe tomorrow I should call you out about a certain New Orleans Detective whilst we're in the bullpen, or maybe when we're all together in the round table room.' Emily said.

JJ's smile faltered for a second and then she composed herself and waved her hand dismissively at Emily.

'What? Did something happen?' Emily said gently.

JJ took a deep breath. 'You could say that.'

'Did you break up?' Emily asked.

JJ shook her head and blinked a couple of times.

'JJ what is it?' Emily pushed.

'Ah, nothing, it's nothing. Things just got a little complicated, that's all.' JJ said quietly.

'Do you want to talk about it?' Emily asked.

JJ shook her head. 'It's fine.'

'I'm always available if you change your mind.' Emily said.

'I know. You should concentrate on Reid, and hey, don't worry about Rossi. He'll come round. I'm sure. He can't be a total ass forever.' JJ said as she fastened her seatbelt as the jet began to descend.

* * *

'It's too late for trick or treating but too early for sleep, you want to get dinner?' Emily said to Reid as the team made their way to their cars. Reid shrugged and remained silent.

'Ok, how about I grab take out and bring it to your place?' Emily offered.

'No!' Reid snapped. 'Ah sorry, um...dinner would be good but my place is out of your way.' He said quickly.

'OKaay, somewhere in between?' She said slowly.

Reid hesitated.

'I don't think you should go home and brood alone.' Emily said.

'Brood? Why would I brood?' Reid said.

'Oh I don't know. Maybe because your hero turned out to be an ass and your feelings are a little hurt?' She said.

'I'm not a child Emily. David Rossi is not my hero and my feelings are not hurt.' He replied.

Emily sighed. 'Ok. Let's just get dinner because we're both hungry and it's what couples do when they're dating. Now, pick somewhere or I will.' She whispered fiercely.

Reid rolled his eyes. 'There's a bistro off Fourth and Wiltshire. I go there a lot. It's called Lo Squalo.'

'The shark?' Emily said as she searched her phone. 'I have it. I'll meet you there.'

* * *

The Bistro was tiny and somewhat overcrowded with all the patrons squashed within, but from the second they opened the door and her senses were hit with the smell of smoked pumpkin from the carved Halloween decorations that sat on each table, Emily found that she liked the small Mom and Pop establishment.

She liked it even more when the proprietor greeted Reid like an old friend and then asked him to introduce his "_bella girlfriend_". It was oddly comforting. Rather like visiting her paternal grandmother when she was a child. She also liked the table they were seated at. It was a small booth tucked in a corner that had curved seating which left them sat almost side by side and hidden away. The proprietor laughed when Emily commented on the table.

'This is his regular table, now usually he wants to hide away with a book but tonight, with such a beautiful woman on his arm, wouldn't you prefer to sit near the window?' He asked.

'Oh no, his usual seat is fine.' Emily said ignoring Reid's blushing.

'So, this is a regular haunt?' Emily asked Reid once they were seated and their order given.

Reid shrugged. 'It's nice and the food is good, well, the spaghetti is good. I've yet to try anything else.'

'And you've been coming here how long?' Emily asked.

Reid shifted in his seat and rubbed his palm over the top of one of his canes that was propped against the corner of the booth.

'I should try something else but I dislike change, I know, it's a ridiculous trait.' He said quietly.

'Hey, so the spaghetti is good and you like to stick with it. That's good enough for me.' Emily said, noting the miserable look on his face.

Reid shrugged and carried on twisting the top of his cane under his cupped palm. Emily leaned forward and gently covered his hand with hers.

'Stop.' She said, gently squeezing until his hand stilled under hers. She watched him frown and clench his teeth. 'Stop whatever it is your are doing in there.' She said as he gently tapped her index finger against his head.

'I screwed up and the worst part is that I _knew_ I would. I tried so hard to reign myself in but I had to bombard him with questions on psycholinguistics and Ruby Ridge.' He swallowed and pulled her hand up to his mouth, pressing a hard kiss to the back of it.

'Look at me, Spencer, look at me.' Emily demanded. 'You did _nothing _wrong. The man is a set in his ways dinosaur who clearly does not play well with others. He was rude to you and that is _his_ problem not yours.'

Reid continued as if she hadn't spoken. 'It wouldn't be so bad if I thought it was just my personality that he hated but the look he gave Hotch when he introduced me as a consultant was disparaging at best and he _stared_, Emily he stared at me every time I stood up or walked anywhere, making it clear to me that he dislikes not only my personality but my employment status and physical bearing. How do I change all that Emily, keeping my mouth shut won't cover _all that_.' He said, forcefully shoving his cane in to the corner of the booth.

Emily put her hand on his jaw and held his gaze. 'You don't, you don't change a single particle Dr Reid.'

As she spoke she ran her hand across his shoulders and down his back, her fingers only faltering as they met something stiff beneath the smooth fabric of the shirt where it covered his lower back. She stilled her hand as she felt his whole body tense as he reached back to grasp her fingers, pulling them forward, entwining them tightly with his in his lap.

'Don't.' He said.

**CMCM**


	14. Chapter 14

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

**Some dialogue taken from S2;E17**

**As always, thank you for all your support and encouragement.**

**Chapter Fourteen**

**The Consultant**

'So, it's Saturday morning and we're not in the mall. Explain to me again why that is Harper.' Alexa Lisbon bitched as she leafed through a year old fashion magazine she'd found on Harper's coffee table.

Harper ignored her friend's comments and concentrated on the list of caterers she was compiling.

'You know I saw Janey-Lee at the salon last week. She was gushing about how we have the best alumni coordinator of any high school leavers' year to date. Why she was just amazed at how much stuff's organized.' Alexa drawled.

Harper finished her list and moved on to her first draft of mobile disco's and live bands.

'I told her we'd always been a close knit year.' Alexa said as she flipped the magazine shut. 'Don't you have any up to date reading material in this place?'

Harper's hand stilled above the paper. Was the band a higher priority than arranging the printers for the invites and name badges, she wondered. She gazed up at the ceiling and considered her planning strategy. No. The band took priority. Once she had that fixed along with the caterer and the booking of the school hall then she could move onto the invites and name badges. She resumed writing her list.

'Of course I didn't tell her the truth, you know about how you've actually flipped out, about why you are always organizing this insane number of events, and it is insane Harper, it really is. As insane as Nervous Wreck's mom and believe me that lady is batshit insane.' Alexa said.

Harper turned to look at her. 'What?'

'You heard me. Look, I know why you're doing this. Why we had a reunion only five years after we'd all left, why you arranged the Thanksgiving Cook Out and that Fourth of July dance, why you're sat here now arranging reunion number two,only thirteen years after we all left. I know what you're waiting for Harper but it will _never_ happen.' Alexa said as she stood and grabbed her purse.

'What'll never happen? What am I doing Alexa apart from keeping up ties with friends? I don't hear you complaining or Janey-Lee!' Harper said as she gathered up her notebook and planning folder.

'You're waiting for _him_ Harper and he's never gonna come.' Alexa snapped back.

Harper shook her head. 'I have no idea what you're talking about.' She said.

'OK, I'll play the game. So on your list of invites you don't have Nervous Wreck's name? Show me the list Harp, show me and if it's not there I'll never mention it again.' Alexa said.

Harper held her note book close to her chest. 'You shouldn't call him that.' She said quietly.

'His name's on that damn list isn't it! You've been writing invites to a ghost for all these years Harper. He moved and most likely moved on. I see his goddamn mother everyday and _she_ doesn't even remember me, she doesn't bat an eyelid when I'm in the same room.' Alexa said.

'What? You actually expect her to speak to you Alexa after what we did to her son? Maybe she has nothing to say to you, you ever think of that?' Harper said.

Alexa dumped her purse back on the floor and ran her fingers through her hair. 'You don't even know where Spencer Reid is, you've been sending those invites to his house knowing that it's been closed up for years! It's insane!'

Harper unlocked the desk drawer and slid her notebook and folder inside, pocketing the key as she avoided Alexa's gaze.

'Harper?' Alexa said calmly as she put her hands on her friend's shoulders and looked at her closely. 'Harper, honey, you _have_ been sending the invites to his old house, haven't you?'

Harper chewed on her lip. 'I mailed them to him.' She said.

'Yeah, to his old house right...Harper? Where did you send them Harper, like I said, he moved, you don't know where he is anymore.' Alexa said shaking her head.

'I found him.' Harper said quietly, finally looking her old friend in the eye.

'You _what_?' Alexa said.

'It wasn't hard. He was at Caltech, for quite some time and then he had a spell at CalSci, not as long as Caltech but long enough to get an address. The last time I checked he was teaching at Georgetown University in DC.' Harper finished.

Alexa sank back onto one of the stools that lined the kitchen counter. 'You've been sending him invites the whole time, to _everything_?' She whispered.

'The whole time. Welcome to my world Lex.' Mike said as he entered the room and shouldered his way to the other side of the counter.

'She's been searching for this guy and mailing him invites and you let her?' Alexa said.

'I can't exactly stop her. What do you want me to do? I've tried everything Alexa. She's not gonna let it go!' Mike snapped. 'Look, get yourself to the mall. I'll make sure she fixes herself up and I'll drop her off in an hour. Shop. Spend my money, whatever. Just get her out of the house doing _something_ will ya?'

Alexa slid off the stool and grabbed her purse. Shaking her head she took one last look at her best friend and left.

Mike sank down on one of the stools and patted the seat of the one next to him. 'Come on. Just sit down and talk to me.' He held out his hand.

Harper reached out and grabbed his fingers, allowing herself to be pulled onto the seat next to him.

'I'm sorry about the other night. I just... I want you to feel better Harper and I'm out of ideas, I've tried everything to get him out of your head.' Mike whispered as his girlfriend leaned into his chest. After a moment he felt a warm dampness in his shirt and knew she was crying again. His stomach swelled and dipped with anger. She couldn't continue like this, _they_ couldn't continue like this. He pressed a hard kiss to the top of her head.

'You know there _is_ something I haven't tried. I might need to take a little trip but I promise I'll make it better honey, I promise. I'll make it all go away.' Mike whispered into her hair.

* * *

Reid swore under his breath as the screwdriver he was using slipped against the tiled wall of his shower and took a neat slice out of the back of his left hand. Shaking his hair from his eyes he ignored the sting of the cut and shoved the flat blade of the screwdriver back into the head of one of the screws that held the back plate of the fold down shower seat to the wall and twisted.

'Damn it.' He muttered as the screw turned uselessly and a fine sprinkling of tile dust poured from the hole it turned in.

He laid the screwdriver in his lap and pushed himself away from the shower. He had a vague headache, had experienced one of the worst night's sleep he had ever suffered and was now cradling an injured hand to his chest. These things coupled with waking infuriatingly early on a Saturday morning and being overcome with guilt when he thought about how badly he had treated Emily the night before, were making his temper even worse. Why he'd even thought that doing his long overdue DIY would be a good idea he wasn't sure.

Groaning, he leaned back in his wheelchair and thought about the previous night. Dinner had been fine but he hadn't been able to shake off the negative feelings David Rossi had induced in him. He knew it was dumb but Rossi's behaviour had undermined his confidence and from there it hadn't taken much for all his old feelings of self doubt to come flooding back. Doubt in his ability to do the job, doubt in his social abilities, doubt in his physical abilities. Emily touching him hadn't helped. He tried so hard not to tense up when her hand had moved down his back but as he felt her fingers meet the stiff upper edge of his lumbar support brace he'd been overwhelmed by the desire to move away from her, to stop her from going any further and so, flooded with embarrassment, he'd reached back for her hand and pulled it away.

She was hurt, he saw that clearly. He should have explained, or at the very least just kissed her and thanked her for not letting him go home and mope, but he hadn't. Instead he'd taken all his frustration out on her, snapping at her when she asked what was wrong and then going on the defensive when she'd pushed further.

Spencer shook his stinging hand and groaned in frustration as his memory replayed their parting conversation as they left the bistro.

'_Spencer what is wrong with you? I've never seen you act this way.' Emily had said as they stood outside of the tiny restaurant._

'_Oh really? In the months that you've know me, you've never seen me act this way? With all due respect Emily, you don't really know what you're talking about do you?' He snapped._

He pushed himself out of the bathroom and was wheeling his way toward the kitchen and his first aid kit when he heard a knock at the door.

He stopped his chair abruptly. Now that Gideon had left he rarely had visitors and usually it was his neighbour, Mrs Hernandez. She often took delivery of packages for him, usually books or journal subscriptions that needed to be signed for.

Wheeling to the door he slipped the latch and skilfully pushed himself back whilst pulling the door open. It wasn't Mrs Hernandez.

'Hey kid.' Morgan smiled as he stood balancing two take out coffee's and a box of donuts in his hands.

'Morgan? What are you doing here?' Reid asked as he stared up at his colleague.

'Apparently I'm standing in the hallway balancing hot drinks.' Morgan quipped.

Spencer shook his head and pushed his chair further back to let Morgan in. 'Sorry, I'm sorry...I wasn't really expecting anyone, or well, anyone from work...or anyone at all.'

'Are you ok? ' Morgan asked as he set the drinks down on the coffee table.

'I'm fine, why would you think I wasn't?' Reid said.

'You're using your chair.' Morgan said.

'Oh...well, I was doing ...um fixing something and I needed a free hand so...' Reid shrugged and nodded down toward the wheelchair.

'You do know you're not supposed to use that thing on your hand, right?' Morgan said as he grabbed the screwdriver and looked pointedly at the cut on the back of Reid's hand.

Reid frowned and looked confused.

'Your hand, it's bleeding.' Morgan said.

'Oh, right, I was on my way to get my first aid kit.' Reid pushed back from Morgan and wheeled quickly into the kitchen area where he pulled a large first aid kit from one of the drawers.

Morgan followed him, dumping the box of donuts on the counter top while Reid swiped at the back of his hand with a sterile wipe.

'So, what are we fixing?' Morgan said with a mouthful of donut.

Reid pressed the bandage to the back of his hand and looked up at Morgan. 'Why are you here?'

Morgan laughed. 'I'm going to pretend that's your version of "Hey, great to see you, thanks for stopping by" kid.'

Reid flushed bright red and ducked his head, his hair falling into his eyes as he continued to press on the bandage covering the back of his hand.

'I thought you could use a little company after the last two days, you know, Rossi, he was pretty harsh and it seemed to bother you.' Morgan said.

'It didn't.' Reid said bluntly. 'Where did you put my screwdriver, I really need to get this done.' He wheeled his way past Morgan, his eyes searching the lounge.

Morgan sighed and set down his half eaten donut. 'Tell me what you're trying to fix and I might be able to help. I flip houses in my spare time. There's not much I can't do.'

Reid swallowed hard and pushed his hair out of his eyes. He didn't want Morgan fixing the pull down seat but he really was tired of not being able to sit down when he took a shower. He could stand if he didn't stay in too long, leaning with his hand and shoulder against the tile, but it was hard work washing with one hand and it gave no opportunity to relax. He could call his apartment super again but he'd already called twice and was tired of waiting.

'Um...it's my shower.' He said.

'I'm pretty good with plumbing so shouldn't be a problem.' Morgan said as he walked down the hallway to the bathroom with Reid following him silently.

'It's not actually the shower, it's the ah...the seat, one of the screws is loose and I... it makes me a little nervous.' Reid laughed shakily.

Morgan leaned into the cubicle and tugged on the back plate of the seat, watching the tile dust spiral through the air as he did so. 'I think I'd be nervous too. Is the screw taking or is it turning in the hole?' Morgan asked.

'It just turns. I can't get it to tighten.' Reid mumbled.

'We should take it off of the wall and re-fix it. I have my truck outside and my tool kit's in the back.' Morgan said.

Reid opened his mouth to speak but Morgan cut him off. 'It's no trouble kid, besides, I really don't think you can afford to land on your ass if that thing comes off the wall. And, more importantly, I'd hate to go back to doing double the amount of case files if you're laid up.' He laughed.

* * *

Reid cradled his take out coffee in his hands and watched as Morgan expertly removed the old plugs from the screw holes in his shower wall. He'd been working on fixing the seat for the last half hour, with Reid watching him.

'You should get the super to install a new one, I mean when I'm done it'll be safe as houses but it looks like it could use an update.' Morgan said as he pried a particularly stubborn plug from the tiled wall.

Reid shook his head as he swallowed a mouthful of coffee. 'The super fixes things, after a month or two of calls, but he doesn't supply or install any of this stuff. I paid for all the modifications I needed myself.'

Morgan paused and looked over his shoulder at Reid. 'Huh, nice landlord. Well, if you do replace it don't pay for an install, just tell me and I'll fit it for you.'

Reid smiled and fidgeted with the coffee cup. 'Thanks Morgan.'

'It's not a problem Reid.' Morgan said.

'Is this you still trying to educate me in the art of friendship?' Reid said.

'Yeah, and for a genius you're kind of a slow learner.' Morgan laughed.

'Seems like I'm a slow learner at a lot of things recently.' Reid said quietly.

Morgan stopped working on the plugs and turned back to Reid. 'What things?'

Reid frowned and looked at his feet. 'It's nothing, I just...'

'Reid.' Morgan prompted.

Reid started to rub his left leg and cleared his throat a couple of times. 'You're um...well, you know about girls...ah women, right?'

'Oh man! Please tell me you're not gonna ask me how to understand them?' Morgan said, laughing.

Reid frowned. 'No. That would be fruitless. There's no quantifiable way of accurately understanding any one human being. We're all unique in our thought patters and desires, the way we ...'

'Reid!' Morgan said. 'How about you just tell me what's on your mind?'

Reid sighed and looked at his friend. 'I think I messed up last night, with Emily.'

'Go on.'

'You were right, about Rossi, he, well he... he pissed me off!' Reid said vehemently. 'He was rude and he stared and I felt like I was back in high school and I ... I wasn't really angry with him, he's just an ass...I was angry with myself for allowing him to affect me like that and well...I... I may have ...'

'You may have what?' Morgan asked.

'I may have taken it out on Emily.' Reid said.

'May have or _did_?' Morgan said.

'Um...did.' Reid licked his lips nervously. 'I just felt...um...I didn't feel good...about myself ... and she had her hand on my shoulder and then she was touching me, my back and I could feel her hand getting lower and, and it was really stupid, I know it was stupid but we seem to have passed all the usual number of dates and I don't really know how to take things now and when she touched my...I just... I pushed her away and she gave me this look, this _hurt_ look.' Reid said in a rush.

Morgan raised his eyebrows and let out a breath. 'OK, let's just break this down. Set Rossi aside, he'll wait. You freaked 'cause Emily touched your back. Why?'

Reid frowned and picked at the lid of the now empty coffee cup. 'I don't want her to know that I have to wear this stupid brace.' He said.

Morgan sighed. 'We've had this conversation already youngster, about you trying to hide yourself from her. She knows you have physical issues, she's already armed with this information and she has made the informed decision that she wants to date you. She not gonna run away when confronted with it Reid.' Morgan said.

Reid shrugged.

'You said before that this thing wouldn't last. That was your get out, how you justified keeping her in the dark, but you've gone past your weird self imposed four dates only thing and you're freaking out.' Morgan said.

'I am not freaking out! I don't freak out, I just...' Reid looked down at his lap and took a deep, shaky breath. 'I really like her and now I've accepted that, I'm scared it will end and then I'll be back to being alone and I don't think I can do it.' Reid looked across at Morgan. 'I didn't realise it felt like this, to have someone like you in this way.' He said.

'She won't ditch you if you let her in Reid. Give her some credit.' Morgan said.

'What if I show her and she doesn't want to have to deal with all that...with me.' Reid swallowed hard and blinked.

'You just gotta take the chance Reid.' Morgan said.

'You don't understand.' Reid whispered.

'So explain it to me.' Morgan said, setting his tools down and sliding down the wall and on to his ass.

Reid was quiet for a moment before he shook his head. 'It's embarrassing.'

'_It_?' Morgan pressed.

Reid avoided his gaze, his face flushed.

'Are we talking about sex here?' Morgan asked.

Reid frowned.

'So talk to me man, we're both guys, we both got the same plumbing, we do the same stuff.' Morgan said.

Reid shoved his hair back from his face and cleared his throat. 'I...can't... I don't...shouldn't talk about..._relations_...it's...' Reid fumbled his words.

Morgan swiped a hand over his head and suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at Reid's antiquated use of the word _relations_. 'This is what guys do Reid, we talk to each other about this stuff. It doesn't have to be lewd and it doesn't mean you're disrespecting your partner. It happens all the time. Boys talk to their fathers or older brothers. Buddies talk to buddies.'

Reid stared at his lap. 'Well my father left when I was ten, he didn't stick around for The Talk and I don't have an older brother.' He looked up at Morgan and gave him a wry smile. 'I think we already established that I suck at the whole buddies thing.'

'So tell _me_. This can be your first time with a buddy.' Morgan said.

Reid blinked and cleared his throat. 'It's just, well...Emily and I...things progressed a little recently which is great, if I'm truthful with myself it's what I had hoped for and I want to...you know, when the time is right...I really do...' He swallowed and took a breath. 'But Emily, she might expect..._oh, god_...it just...it can be difficult...for me...to, well...um...'

'Perform?' Morgan supplied.

Reid winced at Morgan's choice of wording. 'I can't talk about this, I can't.'

'You can. Look, I think I get where you're coming from. You think Emily has expectations based on past experience and you're worried that potential experiences with _you_ won't live up to that.' Morgan said.

Reid nodded. 'I've had, you know, my own _experiences_ before but not many and they were single incidents.'

Morgan smiled widely. 'My man! Are you a playa?' He joked, lightening the mood immediately.

Reid smiled shyly. 'Not really.' He said. 'It's only happened twice, both times on the lecture circuit. Large groups of bored delegates and lonely speakers. You know, people staying in hotels, away from their comfort zones and places of work will often partake of atypical behaviour.'

'Seriously? Maybe I should attend some of these profiling lectures I get invited to.' Morgan said.

'I'm sure it would be a halcyon paradise for you.' Reid said wryly. 'Anyway, nice as those experiences were, there was no pressure, no expectations. I wasn't what those women were going to saddle themselves with for the foreseeable future but Emily, well, what am I going to be promising her Morgan? Welcome to the rest of your sex life Emily, you're on top 'cause it's one position and one position only, I hope you like it.' Reid took a deep breath and shook his head again. 'I'm sorry. That was crude.' He said.

Morgan stared at his friend, noting the look of pain on his face. 'I can't say that I know how you feel kid...'

'No, you can't Morgan. When you take a woman to bed you can lay with her and if you want to hold her in your arms and kiss her you can just do it without a second thought. You don't have this damn voice in your head telling you to be careful, don't move to quickly, don't twist yourself that way, it'll _hurt_.' Reid said.

Morgan was silent for a moment. 'You're right, but so am I when I tell you to talk to her. Lots of couple's face physical challenges like these and they make it work, they have fulfilling sex lives. You can too, unless you're just too afraid to try.

* * *

'I'm sorry.' Reid said as he stood in the doorway to Emily's apartment.

'Well, your apologies are definitely improving.' Emily said as she straightened the tight fitting yoga top she was wearing for her workout.

Reid sent her a pleading look. 'I let what happened with Rossi affect me and I took it out on you. I really am sorry Emily and if you can stand to try again I'd like to take you back to Lo Squalo tonight.'

'Can we have a window seat this time?' Emily asked as she swung the door open and let Spencer in to her apartment.

'I like my booth but as I'm supposed to be making amends then yes, we can take a window seat. If they have one.' Reid replied.

Emily closed the door and turned back to Reid. 'Alright. You can make up for your little tantrum with dinner but you're not completely off the hook. I want an explanation.'

Reid tried to avoid Emily's gaze but found he couldn't. Staring into her eye's he frowned and shook his head. He didn't want to do this, he didn't want to be as open as Morgan said he should be but he was going to mess things up if he couldn't speak to her and if he didn't do it soon she was going to show him the door.

She stepped forward slowly, forcing him to move back a little until his shoulders brushed the wall of the hallway. She didn't speak but gave him an expectant look. He fixed his eyes with hers and took a deep breath.

'I was scared.' He said. 'No, that's not right, I _am_ scared.'

'Why?' Emily said.

'I've never...sustained relationships aren't within my realm of experience and I don't want to ruin this.' Reid said.

'Why would you ruin it?' Emily said frowning.

'Because I can't...I'm afraid that I can't be what you need Emily.' Reid said. 'There are things, _physical_ things, that I can't do...I'll disappoint you.'

Emily moved again, standing as close to him as she could without touching.

'A handful of dates and you think you know what I need?' She said, her voice hard and low.

Reid swallowed, he could smell her shampoo and a faint trace of sweat as she leaned in.

'You think you know everything about what fulfils me? For a genius that's not all that smart Spencer.' She said as she settled her hands at his waist.

Reid tensed, his hands gripping his canes as she splayed her fingers across his lower back.

'_This_, whatever this is,' she said as she pressed her palms against his brace, 'doesn't matter, none of it matters to me. It doesn't change what I want and as for what you can or can't _do_, you're forgetting that sex, sex is a dialog not a monolog, it's two people _together_ creating one act. It can be many things Spencer.'

Reid couldn't stop his breath shaking as her hands travelled up his back and she dipped her face close to his, her lips almost caressing his ear.

'Sure, it can be frenetic, wild, but there's a lot to be said for control, for measured movements.' She blew gently into the shell of his ear. 'A touch in the right place,' she whispered as she moved to dance her fingertips along his collar bone, pressing lightly where she found the hollow of his throat, 'can be all that's needed if it's coming from the right person, and you, Spencer, you're the right person. Your voice, how you use your hands when you speak, the way you lick your lips that makes me _wish_ you were licking mine...'

Emily's words were swallowed abruptly as Spencer's lips met hers, his tongue pressing forward as she threaded her fingers through his hair and gently pressed herself against him. Every part of his body that touched her, his lips, the brush of stubble against her cheek, his chest as he fought to get his breaths under control, the hardness of his cock as it stirred against her hip, sent a rush of heat straight to her groin. Pulling away a little she pressed her palm against his cheek.

'You don't know what I need, so please, _please_, don't make the mistake of not trying to find out.' She said as she pressed her lips to his once more. 'Let's find out Spencer, let's find out how we can fit.' She breathed.

Reid felt his chest heave. He wanted to cry and laugh at the same time. 'Yes.' He whispered between kisses. 'Yes.'

'Good.' She said firmly. 'Because, Spencer Reid, you have no _idea_ what we could do together.'

**CMCM**


	15. Chapter 15

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

As mentioned in Chapter One I have re-arranged the canon chronological order of some episodes to suit the storyline. With this in mind, going forward allusions to the following episodes will come in this order; Limelight, Identity, Elephants Memory and Damaged.

Some dialogue taken from S3;E13 - Limelight.

**I can't give thanks enough for all your alerts, favourites and reviews.**

**Chapter Fifteen**

**The Consultant**

'So, d'ya get lucky this weekend Dr Reid?' Emily whispered teasingly, flicking Reid's behind with her teaspoon as she leaned around him to grab the Splenda.

Reid coughed on the mouthful of hot coffee he was drinking and raised his eyebrows. 'How is that even close to being appropriate in the workplace and did you actually just flick me with that spoon?'

Emily laughed. 'I did and you are correct it's not appropriate. I guess I just wasn't ready for the weekend to end. I haven't come down from my high yet.'

Reid looked at her over the top of his flask. 'You enjoyed your weekend so much that it left you feeling high?' He asked.

'Absolutely. Friday night was a bit of a washout. My boyfriend was a jerk but he came over on Saturday and made it up to me.'

Reid flushed at the term boyfriend. 'I'd like to think I wasn't a complete jerk.' He said as he regained his composure.

'You were, but you were better behaved when you took me back to the bistro and our day out yesterday was perfect.' She said.

'I think you enjoyed the gallery more than I ever have, in fact I've only ever visited it once before and that was back when I first moved here and needed to fill my weekends with activities.'

'I loved it, especially the Chinese painting exhibition. The orchids were so beautiful and it didn't hurt that I had my very own tour guide who knows everything about them.'

'I don't know everything...just a lot of things.' He smiled shyly.

'I loved it and I loved spending time with you.' Emily said as she reached up and stroked her thumb down his arm.

'So did I. I particularly liked when we _made out_.' He said nodding and failing to hold back a small huff of laughter at the sight of her shocked face. 'Sorry, but I've been waiting for years to use that phrase.'

'What, "made out"?' She said.

'Mmm hmm.' Reid nodded as he took another drink. 'I was prepubescent during high school and at best almost six years younger than my peers in college. It's safe to say that I never "made out".'

'Oh, well then you have a lot of catching up to do.' Emily said as she smirked at him. 'You've gone very red Spencer.' She said.

'The coffee's hot, that's all it...' Reid started.

'Agent Prentiss, good morning.' Agent McManus walked into the break room and dumped a mouldy looking mug on the counter next to Emily. Standing with his back to Reid he gave Emily a blatant look up and down that made her shudder.

'So, how was your weekend Emily? All play and no work I hope.' McManus winked.

Emily suppressed a groan. 'Actually I went to the Sackler Gallery with Dr Reid.' Emily said. 'There was an exhibition of Chinese orchid paintings.' She said.

McManus frowned. 'Wow, sounds...yeah. Well if you find yourself with nothing to do again next weekend you should give me a call. I do _fun_ stuff.' He sloshed a shot of coffee into a fresh mug and turned, giving Reid the once over. 'Later.' He said to Emily as he left the break room.

'He's nice.' Reid deadpanned.

Emily laughed. 'I have yet to find one single redeeming feature.' She said.

'Apparently he does fun stuff.' Reid said absently as he stared at the space where McManus had been.

* * *

David Rossi leaned back in his leather chair and contemplated the manila file on the desk in front of him. The case that the Philadelphia office had raised _was_ interesting. Not exceptionally interesting but it might just give him a day out of the office and away from the perpetual group hug that was the BAU's first team.

His return to the bureau hadn't been as smooth as he'd anticipated. If he was truthful with himself he hadn't really given the idea of having co-workers much, if any, thought. Finding that he was part of a team, a team which willingly interacted with each other, had come as a bit of a shock. Sure he'd known prior to coming back that the BAU was different now. He knew profilers weren't expected to work alone but he really had thought that given his standing within the FBI community that he wouldn't be expected to fall into that way of working. He was wrong and it annoyed the hell out of him.

He picked the file up and pushed his chair back. He had cabin fever. He needed to get out. A day following up a potential case all alone would be just fine with him. It would be like old times.

* * *

The bullpen was empty apart from Hotch and Reid. Rossi made his way down the stairs and waved the file toward Hotch.

'Have we got something?' Hotch asked.

'I'm not sure. An old, unclaimed storage unit turned up some disturbing material. Hand written diaries. A case agent from the Philly field office sent it to me.' Rossi said.

'Someone you know?' Hotch asked.

'She knows me, you know.' Rossi replied.

'Ah, a fan. Your world's a very crowded place, isn't it.' Hotch said dryly.

'You'd be surprised.' Rossi replied.

'This is detailed.' Hotch said as he leafed through the file.

Rossi tensed as he saw Reid grab his canes and push himself up from his chair. He clenched his jaw as Reid came to stand beside them.

'Future tense. They're fantasies.' Reid said as he read the vivid descriptions of torture over Hotch's shoulder.

'That agent thinks it could be more than that.' Rossi said ignoring Reid.

'There's more of this?' Hotch said.

'A few boxes in the field office. I'd like to drive up there, look at the rest of the material, make a judgement from that.' Rossi said.

Hotch was quiet for a moment as he continued to leaf through the file. Eventually his gaze flickered to Reid and then back to Rossi. Snapping the file closed he handed it back to Rossi.

'Take Reid with you.' Hotch he said as he made his way up the stairs and back into his office.

Rossi was quiet for a second, his mouth gaping slightly as he fought to try to recall how long the drive was from Quantico to Philadelphia.

Reid shuffled slightly on the spot, rotating his palms on the tops of his canes. He could see that Rossi was less than enthusiastic with Hotch's suggestion but there was no way out of it for either of them.

Reid knew he needed to say something to ease the tension and try to get Rossi on his side. After a couple of seconds, transfixed in Rossi's headlamp stare, Reid spoke.

'Road trip. Nice. I've got books on tape with Peter Coyote reading the entire Foundation Trilogy.' He said quickly as he turned and slowly walked to his desk to retrieve his bag, kicking himself over his choice of words even before he had finished saying them.

Rossi blinked and closed his mouth with a snap.

* * *

Emily paced JJ's office, her arms folded in front of her chest, her head shaking.

'What does Hotch think he's doing?' She said.

'Reid will be fine Emily. Rossi's all bark.' JJ said.

'He upset him JJ! He was an ass and made Spe...Reid feel uncomfortable in his own skin. Hotch is a profiler, one of the best, he had to have seen it and he what...thinks it's a great idea to send them on a long car trip together?' Emily said.

'Maybe that's exactly what he thought. Maybe he thinks it'll help.' JJ said.

'Do _you_ think it will?' Emily asked.

'I trust Hotch's judgement.' JJ said.

'My judgement in regards to what?' Hotch's voice came from the doorway. Entering the office Hotch passed a stack of consult files to JJ. 'They're ready to go back to the lead officers.' He said. 'Is there a problem?' He asked, looking between Emily and JJ.

'No.' Emily said.

'Emily's worried about Reid being with Rossi.' JJ supplied, ignoring the glare from Emily.

Hotch looked at Emily. 'Let's go to my office. We can discuss this there.'

* * *

Emily closed the office door and turned to Hotch. 'I'm not worried I just noticed...'

'I don't make a habit of doing things without a reason Prentiss.' Hotch said.

'I know, I'm sorry. I wasn't second guessing you I just... Rossi didn't react well to Reid and I think Reid found it hard. I was concerned that the two of them on this consult together might end badly.' Emily said.

Hotch gestured to one of the chairs and Emily sat down.

'I've known David for years and he has many great qualities and many less great qualities. Sometimes he needs forcing in the right direction and Reid, Reid could work on being less sensitive about certain things.' Hotch said.

'And you think over exposure to Rossi will help that? If Reid's overly sensitive it's because people made him that way and is it really being overly sensitive to react when someone makes a point of staring at you for two days straight?' Emily said.

Hotch laced his fingers in front of him.

'I've know Reid for a few years now. When Jason first introduced me to him he was so shy he could barely look me in the eye. When I asked him a question he directed his answers to Jason. He had little confidence in himself or others. Needless to say he has evolved immeasurably since then. He can handle Rossi. What I'm more concerned about is if he can handle you.' Hotch said, fixing his inscrutable gaze on Emily.

Emily stared at Hotch her mouth open. 'Excuse me?' She said.

'I've consulted the employee handbook on the matter. It was surprisingly easy to locate the appendix on fraternisation as someone seems to have helpfully highlighted it with pink marker pen.' Hotch said as he leaned back in his chair. 'While it isn't technically against the rules for an Agent to fraternise with a civilian employee of the bureau it isn't something that is actively encouraged. I have no intention of making an issue out of it as long as you keep it quiet but I want to be sure that you can both be professional and that you'll be careful.' Hotch said.

Emily shook her head. 'Of course we'll be professional, always. The job comes first.' She said.

Hotch frowned. 'And that's the problem. When I say be careful, I mean with each other. The job _always_ comes first Prentiss and sometimes it swallows relationships whole. Try not to let that happen. I'd like to experience the novelty of some of the members of my team having successful private lives.' Hotch said as he picked up his pen and opened a fresh report.

Emily stared at him for a moment and then stood. 'We'll try sir.' She said.

Hotch nodded, letting Emily reach the door before continuing. 'That is assuming Rossi leaves anything behind after spending three hours in the car with him. He said.

* * *

After ten minutes of overly dramatised Asimov, Rossi flicked the stereo off and plunged the SUV into an awkward silence. Swiping at his beard he swung the vehicle into the overtaking lane and gunned down the freeway. He didn't need to look directly at Reid to know he was uncomfortable. Out of the corner of his eye he could see him fidgeting in his seat, first with his bag, then with the seatbelt where it lay across his lap before letting his fingers fiddle with several annoying strands of hair as they repeatedly fell into his face. After a further ten minutes Rossi decided to try to combat the silence.

'So, what's wrong with you?' Rossi asked.

Reid felt the air leave his lungs and his chest tighten. While he had been on the receiving end of this question before it had only ever been couched so bluntly by pre-schoolers.

'Nothing's _wrong_ with me.' He said defensively after a moment of silence.

Rossi rolled his eyes. 'Look, I'm a direct person, it's how I was raised. I don't have the patience to waste my time with all this political correctness crap where we all dance around the elephant in the room in case we say the wrong thing and in the end nothing gets said. Clearly something _is _wrong or you wouldn't be hauling yourself around on those sticks all day would you?'

Reid pressed his lips together and looked out of the window. Stealing a sideways glance at Rossi he leaned forward and flicked the stereo back on.

Rossi flicked it back off again.

'You know the others, for a skilled profiler like me, they're pretty easy to read. Spend a day with Hotch and you can suss out what drives him, Morgan and Prentiss too but you, well I've been studying you, trying to figure you out Dr Reid and I'm coming up dry.' Rossi said.

Reid smoothed the strap of his messenger bag and stared out of the window. 'I thought there was a moratorium on inter team profiling.' He said.

'And yet we all do it.' Rossi replied. 'You must have tried to find a box to put me in when I arrived. Don't tell me you didn't. It's a habit we can't kick easily.'

Reid pressed his lips together and stayed silent.

'Back in my day we didn't have teams and we certainly didn't have consultants, we managed to do it _all by ourselves_.' Rossi said.

'The whole structure of the BAU has changed since then, even the name has changed.' Reid countered.

'Words.' Rossi huffed. 'The name doesn't matter. It's the people doing the work that matter and it makes no odds if they're part of a team or a lone player, the job is still the same. Catch the bad guys and put them away. My question is this Dr Reid, do you have the necessary fire burning in your gut or is this just a box you're ticking, were you bored of the PhD's and this is your next challenge? You see Aaron told me about you and your achievements and while they _are_ impressive they make me wonder if this isn't just another bunch of letters on your résumé and when you've successfully conquered this challenge you'll move on to your next.'

'I'm not just here for an academic fling, or for material for a string of _books,_ if that's what you're asking.' Reid replied quickly.

Rossi let out a mirthless laugh. 'Touché kid, but while I may have fallen into prostitution along the way I did start with the burning fire and it hasn't gone out yet.' Rossi leaned forward and flicked the stereo back on.

* * *

Reid's back was stiff by the time he levered himself out of the SUV and up the steps of the Philadelphia field office. He and Rossi hadn't spoken much for the rest of the journey and the strained silence left Reid feeling exhausted before the consult had even begun. Rossi strode through the office as if he'd been born there with Reid desperately trying to keep up with him. One good thing he noticed was that all eyes were on the famous David Rossi. For once no one was staring at him and Reid breathed a little easier without the usual weight of scrutiny.

When Rossi finally slowed to a stop Reid found himself hovering outside the lead agent's office as she finished up a phone call.

'David Rossi in my office! Somebody pinch me.' The lead agent said as she disconnected the call.

'You must be Agent Morris.' Rossi said as he shook her hand.

'Jill please, and can I get you anything, coffee...' Agent Morris said.

'Actually if you don't mind I'd like for Dr Reid and I to get to this.' Rossi said.

Reid gave a half smile as Agent Morris noticed him for the first time, her smile faltering as she glanced at his canes.

'Dr Reid,' Agent Morris nodded toward him, 'Thank you both for coming, you won't be disappointed.'

* * *

Rossi flicked through one of the many note books stacked on the table in front of him. He and Reid has been un-piling the contents of eight boxes pulled from the storage unit and had, so far, spent the last four hours sitting in a dim room at the back of the Philly field office with nothing but bad coffee and uncomfortable chairs for company.

Pretending to read the notes Rossi watched Reid. On the last case, Rossi's first back with the bureau, he'd tried to observe Reid to get an idea of what he brought to the team but it hadn't been easy. Everything was done in such a group way that he'd found it hard to study the consultant without other team members distracting him or being a part of what the doctor was doing and that was skewing his findings. That and getting death glares from one of the female Agents, Prentiss, who he sensed didn't like him much, had made his task difficult.

Here though, in this silent room, it was like being at the zoo. He could watch the Lesser Spotted Dr Spencer Reid without any interruption. So far, he thought begrudgingly, he liked what he saw.

The consultant worked with a level of focus that Rossi had never seen before. His mind questioned everything and pushed further with its reasoning and hypothesising than Dave could keep up with, noticing minutiae that many would have missed. To say he was intense was an understatement Rossi thought to himself.

'Time for a break.' Rossi said as he stood and worked the kinks from his neck. 'Fresh coffee and food.'

Reid looked up from the bondage magazine he was cataloguing. 'I'm good, thanks.' He said.

Rossi grunted and then left the room. He paused as he pulled the door shut behind him, staring at Reid as he shifted in his chair and shoved a hand through his hair. He was frowning with concentration as his finger trailed deftly down a page of text and drawings.

'Time to play the prima donna.' Rossi muttered to himself as he strode toward Agent Morris's office.

'You've been in there a long time.' Agent Morris said as Rossi stepped into her office.

'This is why I need coffee and food.' Rossi said bluntly.

Agent Morris smiled. 'There's a place down...'

'Take out is fine. I don't want to waste any more time than I have to.' Rossi said.

Agent Morris blinked and then regained her composure. 'Right, there's a specialist deli I can get an order from, they can make anything, the most elaborate order doesn't even faze them.'

Rossi waved her comment away with a flick of his hand. 'Something plain, on white and good coffee, make sure there's plenty of sugar packets.' He said.

'Wow, my profiling skills are way off.' Agent Morris said as she reached for her phone. 'I had you pegged as a connoisseur, filet mignon and Kopi Luwak coffee beans.'

'Yeah, well looks can be deceiving. I need it here in the next ten minutes, oh, and a decent chair to sit on wouldn't go amiss.' Rossi snapped as he left the room.

* * *

Reid looked up when a wrapped sandwich and cup of coffee was dumped on the table in front of him.

'Here ya' go tough guy. Food and coffee.' Rossi said as he stepped back to allow one of two leather chairs to be wheeled past him.

The door swung shut behind the retreating backs of the agents who had brought the chairs and food into the evidence room.

'About time we started getting treated right.' Rossi said as he dug into his sandwich. 'I take it that you do actually eat Dr Reid?'

Reid glanced at his watch. 'I didn't realise the time.'

'Well it's past lunch time so dump your butt into a real chair and eat. I don't want Hotch chewing me out because you're fainting like a damsel in distress on my watch.' Rossi growled.

Reid gathered his canes, pushed himself off the metal chair he'd spent the last few hours in and lowered himself into the comfortable looking leather director's chair that had been left next to him.

'I'm not a fainter.' Reid said as he unwrapped the sandwich. 'Turkey mayo on white.'

'It's edible.' Rossi said pointedly.

'I wasn't complaining. Actually it's my favourite.' Reid said as he pulled a corner from the sandwich and began to eat.

Rossi watched as Reid picked at the sandwich and drank his coffee.

'Then how about you eat all of it?' He said eyeing the half eaten food.

'My stomach's a little queasy.' Reid replied. 'Coffee will settle it.'

'Is it the material?' Rossi asked indicating the papers spread around them. 'You need to learn to close the book and forget about it Dr Reid. You won't last long if you don't.'

Reid stared at Rossi for a moment. 'I have an eidetic memory.' He said simply.

Rossi frowned in confusion.

'It relates primarily to things that I read, I remember everything with perfect recall and clarity.' He said.

Rossi dusted the crumbs from his lap. 'So how do you set this stuff aside once it's over?' Rossi asked.

'I don't.' Reid replied, turning his attention back to his sandwich. 'Do you think there's anything here to pursue, for Agent Morris?' Reid asked, changing the subject.

Rossi sighed. 'Not sure, I doubt it's more than fantasies. There's no hard evidence at this time. Besides, I'd rather not stay here too long. I had to pull rank with my celebrity status to get bad sandwiches and a half decent chair. Imagine if we had to stay over.'

Reid stared at Rossi. 'I'm surprised it was on your agenda, the chairs I mean. When you work you usually stand, if not then you sit on the edges of desks or lean against the wall. I'm surprised you felt that a comfortable chair was a necessity.' Reid said.

Rossi picked up another diary and opened it. 'What can I say, I'm a diva.'

* * *

Reid groaned as he sat on the edge of the bed and started to unbutton his dress shirt. He felt exhausted. The drive to Philadelphia had been tiring enough but then spending a full day combing through the boxes of material coupled with a night in a strange bed had left him physically depleted. He had been hoping, as had Rossi, to return to Virginia the day before but Agent Morris had come up with some compelling physical evidence that made them call in the rest of the team.

He felt happier when they arrived, less like he was under Rossi's microscope especially as he had Hotch with him when Rossi went through the salient points of the case. He still felt tense though, Rossi's behaviour was confusing him and he had no idea how to sort it in his mind, how to categorise what it meant. He found that more tiring than anything else.

He'd gotten his bed ready, getting extra pillows sent up to his room the night before. He'd created his usual cocoon of support and dimmed the lights, ensuring he had a flask of coffee on the night stand and the TV remote on the bed.

He'd already changed into his sleep pants and was in the process of unbuttoning his shirt when he heard a knock at the door. Drawing in a deep breath he reached for his canes and stood, hoping fervently that nothing had happened with the case that meant he needed to go back to the field office.

It was Emily, standing in the doorway wearing sweats and a tank top, holding a huge bag of chips.

'I have been trying to get a second alone with you all day.' She said as she walked into his room. 'I thought I'd cracked it when we went to the diner but then Morgan invited himself along.'

'I think he was just trying to get away from Agent Morris and her habit of bossing us around.' Reid said as he closed the door behind her.

'She is a little hard to take.' Emily said. 'So, what I really want to know is how yesterday was, with Rossi.'

'There's nothing to tell, it was fine, no different to working with any other agent.' Reid said.

'Maybe you could work on deflecting your body language Dr Reid 'cause at the moment it's screaming to me that you're lying.' Emily said.

Reid sagged a little and fidgeted. 'Fine, it's been hard work, I mean Rossi's been fine mostly but he's somewhat passive-aggressive with his behaviour and honestly, it's a little confusing.'

Reid moved to sit on the bed and Emily followed.

'I mean he leapt from accusing me of only wanting my position on the team to fill some personal need to ordering Agent Morris to fetch me a more comfortable chair.' Reid said.

'Rossi? Rossi made them give you a better chair?' Emily asked.

Reid nodded and frowned. 'Yeah, he tried to make out that it was for himself but he barely sits for a minute when he's working.' Reid said distractedly. 'He also ate a sandwich that, judging by his facial expressions, he pretty much hated but I think he'd gotten Agent Morris to order things he thought _I_ would like. As I said, it's confusing. I wish we were back at home so I could take a moment, immerse myself in something non work related. I know I'd be able to see things more clearly, analyse where he's coming from, if I had a clear head.'

'So you're saying you need to relax and forget about the case and your mind will do the rest.' Emily said.

'Yeah, if only that were possible.' Reid said.

Emily smiled and shook the bag of chips she was holding. 'Channel 200 is showing _all_ the Star Wars movies back to back.'

Reid eyed her closely. 'All?'

'Ah, now I am not falling into that Star Wars geek trap, when I say all I mean four, five and six.' Emily replied.

'Anyone with any taste knows that episodes one, two and three should never be considered as part of the Star Wars set of films.' Reid said quickly.

Emily looked at the turned back bed and then Reid's half buttoned shirt. 'Were you about to go to bed?'

Reid flushed. 'Yeah, I wasn't going to sleep, I just thought...well it's...um a little more comfortable than the chairs they have in here.'

'Works for me.' Emily grinned as she swung her legs on to the bed, shuffled to the other side and grabbed the remote, flicking on the movie, on the way across.

'Doesn't this go against the rules?' Reid said.

'I'll be back in my room before anyone else is awake. If we get called in I have my cell phone.' She said, pulling the phone from her pants pocket. 'And maybe if we can just relax for a couple of hours we might both be fresher for tomorrow.' She reasoned. 'Anyway, it's just a movie marathon Spencer, not a sin to win weekend.

Reid gave her a small smile. He carefully leaned his canes against the night stand and pulled himself further back onto the bed and into his wall of pillows. He was about to lean back when he realised he was still wearing his dress shirt. He hesitated, his fingers fluttering over the buttons.

'Are you ok?' Emily asked as she settled back against the headboard.

'Yeah.' Reid said quietly, leaning further back and leaving the buttons alone.

'You still have your shirt on.' Emily said as she leaned forward and snagged a soft tee shirt from the end of the bed. 'Is this what you need?'

Reid shook his head, pulling the soft shirt from Emily's hand. He was about to drop it over the side of the bed when she caught his wrist.

'Why can't you trust me?' She said.

'What?' Reid said.

'I see you Spencer, I see you in the office and when we go out, I see that sometimes you're in pain or need something and you hide it from me and I'm not sure why.' Emily said gently. 'Did you not hear me the other day when I said that this doesn't matter to me?' She moved her hand down to his side and pressed her palm against the brace that was hidden beneath his shirt.

'It matters to me.' Reid whispered after a moment.

Silently Emily knelt up and pressed her palm against his cheek. Moving his face close to hers she pressed a kiss to his lips and let her fingers find the buttons of his shirt.

'Sit forward.' She said.

Reid pushed himself up a little and swallowed hard as Emily worked on the buttons. He could hardly breathe as she slipped the garment over his shoulders and down his back, pulling it from him as gently as she could. He felt her hands run down his spine, her cool fingers ghosting his skin, he felt his breath hitch as her fingers reached the brace.

'Do you sleep with this on or off?' She asked.

Reid closed his eyes and willed his voice not to break as he answered her. 'Off, if I'm not in pain, off.'

'And are you, in pain?' She asked.

Reid shook his head.

Emily leaned into him and circled his waist with her arms, feeling for the strapping that held the brace in place. Her fingers found the ends of the stiff Velcro.

'Does it just peel back?' She asked.

Reid nodded again.

Gently Emily pulled the first stiff strap back, the noise of the Velcro loud in the quiet of the room. Once the first strap was free she worked on the second and then the third and finally the fourth.

She felt Reid sag into her as the brace came loose.

'Are you ok?' She asked.

He nodded into her shoulder. 'Yes, yes...just...' She felt him take a deep, steadying breath against her.

Pulling the brace away from his body Emily slid her hands across the skin of his lower back, the sudden heat intense under her touch. She brushed lightly back and forth, registering the groove of a scar as it ran under her fingers.

'Will you tell me what happened sometime?' She asked quietly.

Reid nodded again. 'Thank you.' He mumbled into her shoulder.

'For what?' She asked.

'For touching me, for touching me _there_.' He whispered.

Emily leaned back and took his face in her hands. She quickly pressed a heated kiss to his lips and then to his cheeks and eyelids and nose and neck, stopping only when he tangled both his hands in her hair and gazed at her. He opened his mouth to speak but no words came.

Pulling away Emily picked up the forgotten tee shirt and levered it over his head. 'I think Han Solo is about to get defrosted.' She said as she cast a quick glance at the TV.

Reid let out a small laugh. 'In that case it's almost time for Princess Leia and her gold bikini. You need to stop distracting me now.' He quipped as he swiped at his eyes, brushing the dampness from them hopefully before she spotted it.

Fixing his tee shirt Reid lay back on the pillows, jumping a little as Emily curled into his side, nudging his arm until he raised it enough for her to rest her head on his chest. The dimness of the room and Emily's warmth made him relax more than he ever remembered doing before and he found himself falling asleep long before Leia and her bikini even graced the screen.

* * *

Mike Rawlins shoved his duffel bag along the floor with his foot. His flight was delayed and he was beyond pissed. Harper had cried when he left, not wanting him to be away for the next three weeks, and the emotional turmoil had left him feeling antsy. He'd called Alexa and asked her to keep an eye on her but he was still worried.

The line for the check in desk moved forward again and he toed his bag forward once more.

Rationally he knew that Harper would be fine, she had her reunion to organise. It would keep her focused enough to not feel too lonely besides, she needed him to do this, hell, he needed him to do this and the fact that he'd managed to get three weeks on a building crew that his cousin was running out of DC had sealed the deal. Things were finally going to work out for them.

He was headed to DC. He had a place to stay, a means to earn money and three weeks to find Spencer Reid. After that, everything would be ok, Harper, his Harper, would be ok.

**CMCM**


	16. Chapter 16

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

Some dialogue taken from S3;E6

I can't give thanks enough for all your alerts, favourites and reviews.

**A/N - 06/05/12 - This chapter has been edited to water down scenes of an adult nature. When the whole story is complete it will be posted in it's entirety on my live journal account, the details of which will be on my bio page. If you are unsure of what content will be there please be assured all you will find is a properly executed sex scene where two adults engage in consensual sex within a committed relationship, without it being shrouded in euphemism and weak symbolism. I'm still bemused as to what is offensive about this, you really couldn't get more vanilla if you tried, but it has been pointed out to me that fics with explicit adult themes are being deleted from the site so I have made changes to avoid this. **

**Chapter Sixteen**

**The Consultant**

Mike Rawlins flopped out across the too soft bed that took up most of his motel room. He was tired and dirty but could hardly motivate himself to drag his behind to the shower. He'd been working on the construction site for three days now and each day had been harder than the last. He was supposed to be placing the electrical wiring, as he was trained to do, but the clown the boss had hired to run the dry wall crew was a no show so he'd stepped in to help his cousin out. Now he was behind in the wiring for the more completed units. Groaning he dragged his hands over his face. After a moment he twisted around and reached for the note paper that he'd left on the shabby night stand.

His heart beat wildly in his chest as he stared at the phone number of the university's administration centre. This was the first day he'd been back from the site early enough to call but now that he had the opportunity he felt suddenly afraid.

Swallowing down a bite of irritation he laughed at himself as he sat up and reached for his cell. _'You must be gettin' soft if you're afraid of facing up to Spencer Reid. What's he gonna do, stutter at you?'_

Mike held the cell phone in his palm and stared at it. He knew there was nothing that Spencer Reid could do to him but he also knew that he had promised Harper and he couldn't fail, if he wanted to get their life back he couldn't fail.

Jabbing the number into the cell he waited.

'You've reached Georgetown University general administration how may I help you?' The perky voice sounded through the cell.

Mike's throat constricted and his tongue felt heavy. He cleared his throat noisily. 'Um, yeah, I...I'm an old alumni from a couple of years back and I'm trying to get back in touch with one of my professors, could you tell me when and where on campus I could find him?'

'Which Professor are you trying to contact sir?' The voice asked.

'Oh, ah Professor Reid, Spencer Reid.' Mike said.

The line was silent for a moment. 'I'm sorry sir but Professor Reid no longer holds office hours or lectures at the University.' The voice said.

Mike felt his stomach drop and bit back a curse of frustration. 'Oh man, that's a real shame. I really need to speak with him. Do you have a contact address or number?'

'I'm sorry sir but I can't give out that kind of information, I do have your number though, I could contact Professor Reid on your behalf and ask him to call you?'

'No! Sorry, no, it's no problem, it's just that ... ah... a mutual friend of ours passed away and the funeral's in a couple of days and I know he'd be devastated if he missed it...it's... never mind, one of my old class mates probably still sees him and I can get in touch that way, don't worry about it.' Mike said.

'I'm really sorry I can't be of more help, but as I said I really don't mind contacting Professor Reid and passing on your...' The voice said sympathetically.

Mike closed his eyes and held back a sigh of irritation. 'No. It's ok. He...um...shouldn't get that kind of news over the phone...I...yeah' Mike fumbled. 'Thanks.' He disconnected the call, tossed the cell on the comforter and lay back down, his hands over his eyes.

* * *

Emily watched Spencer from under her lashes as he shuffled through one of the thirty case files they had spread over the round table. She loved watching him work, loved how he wrinkled his nose in concentration, how his fingers caressed the pages as he read and how, when he frowned, he got a little line of confusion in the middle of his forehead.

'Stop watching me.' Reid muttered, without looking up from the file he was working on.

'I can't help it.' Emily said her voice low and suggestive. 'I have this co-worker who is _incredibly _sexy and I want to stare at him all the time. It doesn't help that today he's wearing a blue button down shirt and these black pants which really compliment his ass. What do you think I should do about it?'

Reid looked at her then and raised an eyebrow delicately. 'I would suggest focusing on the task in hand to take your mind off him. It's increasingly likely that tomorrow you might find your co-worker is wearing a specific beige cardigan that he is certain you _don't_ like in order to alleviate the problem.'

'You are no fun Dr Reid.' Emily pouted as she grabbed another file.

'I might be a _lot_ of fun if we can get this finished and actually leave for the evening.' Reid said.

Emily grinned. 'Oh really, and what kind of fun did you have in mind?'

I thought we might make out.' Reid said absently, engrossed in the file.

'Still not tired of saying that are you.' Emily laughed.

'Nope.' Reid replied as he set the file down. 'So what do we have?'

'Only ones of note are two family annihilators, a spate of animal sacrifices and accompanying church fires in Iowa and a run of threatening letters to a high school in New Mexico so possible school shooter.' Emily reported. 'How does JJ keep on top of all this? I mean we have Hotch and Rossi and both of us going through this stuff and she's only called in sick for three days.'

'I don't know.' Reid said as he set his file down on top of the pile he had made to his left. 'The ones I have can be run down with a telephone consult, nothing special.' He said as he dragged a new stack towards him.

Emily went back to reading her current file and watching Reid again as he started on the next case.

'You're watching me again.' He said.

Emily snorted a laugh and ignored him. Ever since the case in Philadelphia, since the night she had spent in Spencer's room, where he had let her in to a small part of his world and trusted her enough to show part of himself to her, where they had fallen asleep together, ever since that night things were different. The change was subtle but it was there and Emily could feel it and she knew that Spencer could to. It was as if they had both relaxed a little, as if they had moved away from the first, tense throws of the relationship and taken a small but significant step towards something greater. For the first time in her confused and amorphous life Emily Prentiss knew what she wanted and what she wanted was sitting right in front of her. It didn't make any sense to her, her attraction to him didn't make any sense to her, but it was there, in every waking moment of her day, it was there, changing her.

* * *

David Rossi leaned against the door frame of the round table room and through the small crack in the door watched Prentiss watching Reid. He smoothed his goatee thoughtfully as the two agents leafed through the stack of case files. After a minute or two Prentiss spoke, too low for Rossi to hear what she was saying, and leaned across the table to show Reid the file. Rossi watched as Reid leaned in toward his team mate, taking a leaf of paper from the file. He continued to watch as Prentiss pointed something out on the page with one hand while the other settled on Reid's arm. He watched as a small smile played at the corners of Reid's lips and his fingers tangled with hers.

'Voyeurism is a precursor to many things Dave.' Aaron said as he approached him from the walk way.

Rossi turned and watched his old friend approach. 'Not interested in them, just wanna know if they're talking about me.' He said.

'Ah, narcissism and paranoia. Now I feel much more comfortable.' Hotch replied dryly as Rossi laughed.

'Comfortable enough to go for a drink or two later?' Rossi asked as Hotch pushed the door to the round table room open.

'You've finished already?' Emily asked as Hotch set his and Rossi's stack of files on the table.

'I gave you two more.' Hotch replied smoothly. 'There's nothing here that warrants an out of town visit at this point.'

'Same here.' Reid said shrugging as Emily turned to him, her brow raised. 'I completed mine and I've just looked over your last two.'

'Good work.' Hotch said. 'I just spoke to JJ. She'll be back tomorrow so no more triage sessions.'

'Thank god for that.' Emily breathed. 'I thought doing the actual consults was bad but going through all this just to _get_ to the consults...'

'As there are no out of town cases I have something else to keep you all occupied.' Hotch said. 'Recruitment drives. They've been arranged for a few weeks now and Strauss handed me the task of allocating the presenters for them. She requested the slots to be filled by the members of this team. I notified the universities today.'

Emily groaned. 'The last time I ran one of those the only question I got was if I'd ever killed anyone.'

'They're proven to be an effective recruitment tool Emily. If executed properly they can garner a real and sustained interest in the right personality types.' Reid said a little smugly.

'I'm glad you think so Reid. You're taking Georgetown with Rossi. Emily and I will be taking a trip to Annandale and Morgan and Garcia will take Lexington when Morgan is back from Chicago.'

Reid stared at Hotch, a horrified look on his face. 'But I'm not an Agent and ... I'm not really the best public speaker...I really...'

Hotch held up his hand. 'You can't dodge this bullet Reid. The bureau wants to widen its net, show people that they can have a role within the organisation as a civilian, hence yours and Garcia's involvement. Your seminar is in two days. I suggest you and Rossi get your heads together about your presentation.'

Rossi flashed Reid a smile that reminded Reid of a wolf.

* * *

Reid let his head fall to the scarred wooden table top and groaned. He was miserable and to add to his misery had just let his forehead drop into a small puddle of beer. Grimacing he sat back up and swiped at his brow.

'It's a bad idea.' He complained.

'Suck it up Doc.' Garcia laughed. 'It's not like it's only you that has to do it. Even I'm being let out of my castle for a day. I am definitely looking forward to it, a day with Derek Morgan extolling my amazing talents to young impressionable minds, what could be better?' She laughed as she twirled the umbrella in her drink.

'You'll be amazing my sweet.' Kevin said as he pulled Garcia's hand toward his lips and proceeded to kiss each one of her fingertips. 'If I was eighteen and you turned up to my college to recruit me I'd be in, no question.'

'You hated me when you were eighteen.' Garcia said.

'What?' Emily said. Both she and JJ had pressed Garcia about how and when she had met Kevin many times but they never got the story. 'You guys knew each other at college?'

'No.' Kevin said at the same time as Garcia said 'Yes.'

'Which is it guys?' Emily said suspiciously.

'I think we need fresh drinks.' Kevin announced as he abruptly turned to leave the table. 'Same again?' He asked before addressing his girlfriend again in a fierce whisper. 'And I didn't hate you I was frustrated by you and your impossible...ahh...' Kevin waved his hand dismissively and strode toward the bar.

'Rabbit hole! That's all I have to say to you Kevin Lynch, rabbit hole!' Garcia yelled before taking a breath and schooling her features back into a saintly smile.

'What the hell was all that about?' Emily laughed. 'So you did meet at college?'

'We didn't meet until Quantico but we ran in the same cyber circles back in the college day and that Miss Emily is all you are getting. Maybe I'll tell you all about it when you're older.' Garcia teased. 'Now let's get back to Reid's impending lecture disaster.

Reid levelled his best glare at her.

'You do realise that you look like an angry kitten when you scowl, don't you sweet cheeks?' Garcia laughed as she reached across the table and ruffled Reid's hair.

Emily choked around her drink and laughed at her boyfriend's sulky expression. 'It won't be that bad. You were a college lecturer, how is this different to that?'

'It's totally different.' Reid squeaked. 'I knew my students and they knew me and my teaching methods and I knew almost all the questions they could ask on the subjects I was lecturing in. There were no curve balls being thrown.' He muttered.

'Just let Rossi run the show. Honestly I doubt you'll get a word past his ego when he's in a room full of impressionable young adults. They'll be staring at him like he's a god. He'll probably be insufferable for days afterward.' Emily said as she took another drink.

Reid remained silent, his shoulders slumped. He was about to launch into another monolog of why his going on the recruitment drive was a bad idea when Garcia jumped up from her seat and waved.

'Morgan's here.' She said.

* * *

'So, how was Chicago?' Reid asked Morgan once he had settled down with his drink. The girls and Kevin were dancing. Garcia had tried to persuade Morgan on to the dance floor but for once he had declined.

Morgan took a long pull on his beer. 'Yeah, it was good thanks.' He said.

Reid stared at his friend carefully. 'You didn't mention that you were going. I take it that it was unplanned.' He said.

Morgan raised his eyebrows. 'What? Are you my personal travel organiser now? I didn't realise I had to run my AL plans through you.'

Reid resisted the urge to curl in on himself and pressed forward. 'I'm just asking Morgan, and only because you seem unhappy and linking that to your sudden trip home I'm concerned, as any friend would be.'

Morgan took another draw on his beer and eyed Reid. Suddenly his demeanour changed and his shoulders sagged. He rubbed a hand over his head. 'Reciprocity huh?'

Reid smiled. 'Reciprocity. I'd like to think that ever since you came and bodily lifted me from my bathroom floor that we can share a few things.' Reid paused and took a swallow of his beer. 'You seem tense and distant, unhappy. I'd like to think that you know that you can talk to me if you want to.' Reid finished, suddenly feeling unsure of his words, knowing that Morgan must have dozens of buddies that he would talk too before Reid.

Morgan turned his attention to Kevin and the girls. 'They look pretty set in for the night huh.'

Reid smiled. 'Yeah, once Garcia and Emily start they don't want to leave the dance floor. I pity Kevin and am enjoying one of the very few times that I am thankful for my canes.' He said, patting the top of one of the sticks.

Morgan rolled the bottle between his palms. 'Something happened back home and I only got to hear about it when my sister called me at the weekend.'

Reid waited for Morgan to continue.

'A high profile local community leader was arrested. He... one of the kids he'd been mentoring accused him of sexually assaulting him and it stuck.' Morgan said.

'Is he a friend of yours? The community leader?' Reid asked.

Morgan snorted a humourless laugh. 'No. I didn't go for him, I went for the kid, to congratulate him.'

'Congratulate him?' Reid said.

Morgan nodded. 'Congratulate him on having the balls to do what I couldn't when I was his age.' He said quietly.

Reid stared at his friend, the realisation of what he had just been told sinking in fast.

'Did you ever tell anyone?' Reid asked.

Morgan shook his head. 'My dad hadn't been dead long, he died in the line of duty, and my mom, well, I was the man of the house. Some man huh.'

'Have you ever talked to anyone?' Reid said.

Morgan shot him a brief smile. 'Yeah, I'm doing it now.' Morgan was quiet for a while and then suddenly took his bottle and held it up. 'To Carl Buford, may you rot.'

Reid picked up his nearly full bottle of beer and knocked it against Morgan's. 'To childhood monsters slain.' He said.

* * *

Rossi carefully swirled the amber liquid around the heavy base of his glass before raising it toward his friend.

'Salute.' He said as Hotch raised his glass back and sank onto the couch Dave had installed in his office. 'Time was I'd have invited you to a good restaurant with great scotch for dessert but my chances of getting you out of the office are slim.'

Hotch smiled and took a sip of his drink. 'It's good.' He said.

'Of course it is. So, when are you going to talk to me about Haley?' Rossi asked.

Hotch sat forward, his elbows on his knees, his glass between his hands.

'Discussing my personal life in the office isn't something I choose to do Dave.' Hotch said.

'We're not exactly announcing it in the middle of the bullpen Aaron, the office is empty and we are old, old friends and I thought, what was it you said to me a while back, "_the team shares everything"_.' Rossi said.

'That's right.' Hotch said curtly.

'There is no "_I_".' Rossi said as Hotch narrowed his eyes. 'Seems a big thing to withhold, separating from your wife, your child.'

Hotch leaned back and closed his eyes. 'Not speaking about it made it less real.' He said.

Rossi leaned forward and refreshed Aaron's glass. 'Was it the job?' He asked.

Hotch snorted. 'That, and her lover.' He said wearily. 'I haven't said anything because I don't want to add to what's usually a crappy day. On the odd days we get that are relatively good enough to make the team feel like socialising I don't want to deflate the mood by bringing up my failed marriage. Besides it's just a split. Divorce hasn't reared its head yet and it might not.'

Rossi raised his eyebrows and took another drink. 'Well, if you really want to keep the sharks from circling the blood in the water just start dropping hints about baby Einstein and Agent Prentiss.' Hotch stilled his half raised glass and stared at Rossi. 'You did know that they were seeing each other right?' Rossi said.

'I did. As long as they keep it quiet and it doesn't compromise our work I'm not going to cause any problems for them.' Hotch said.

'I thought you'd be a little more by the book.' Rossi said.

'Maybe before this thing with Haley, but now, who am I to stop something like this?' Hotch replied. 'Besides, I don't think it's gotten that far yet. There's time for it to fizzle out.'

* * *

Reid reached across the table and took Emily's hand. Morgan had left a half hour ago and Garcia and Kevin were still on the dance floor, the slow tunes having taken over at the end of the night.

Emily laced her fingers with Reid's and squeezed lightly.

'Wanna dance?' Emily asked.

'Wanna hold me up?' Reid replied with a small smile as he waved toward one of his canes.

'It's a slow dance, you could still use your canes and I could spend a good few minutes copping a feel under the guise of dancing.' She said, teasing gently.

Reid shook his head and started to pick the label from his beer bottle.

'You're quiet. What's wrong?' Emily asked.

'Can we go home?' Reid asked.

'Sure, are you still good to drop me off?' Emily asked.

'No, I mean yes, I can, but that's not what I meant.' Reid glanced at her and then let his hair fall across his face as he continued. 'I meant could _we_ go home, yours, mine, I don't care but...can...will you spend the night with me, _properly_.' He asked in a breathless rush. He squeezed her fingers and looked across at her his eyes wide.

'What's wrong?' She repeated.

Reid shook his head. 'Nothing I just, I want to feel...what was it you said to me? I want to feel as though I can be human, at this exact moment in time I want to feel something good, I want to feel something human that's good.' He whispered.

Emily pushed her chair back and stood up, tugging at his hand as she did so. 'OK.' She said.

* * *

There was no fumbling or hasty removal of clothing along Emily's hallway and there was no pit stop groping on her lounge room floor before tumbling along to the bedroom; those were moves that Spencer simply couldn't make, but despite that Emily found herself more aroused by the anticipation than she had ever been before by the time Spencer sat himself on the edge of her bed, dropped his canes to the floor and held out his hand to her. Her breath felt as though it were coming from a tiny hole in her chest as he pressed her open palm flat over his heart, as she had done to him in the bureau parking garage months ago.

His heart was beating like a caged bird and as he looked up at her she saw his pupils dilate so wide that his eyes looked almost black. Apart from his hand, pressing hers over his chest they hadn't touched and already he looked undone.

'You said you wanted to wait, wait until the time was right, are you sure?' He said.

Emily moved closer, standing between his legs. She threaded her free hand into in his hair and leaned down to press a deep kiss onto his lips. 'Absolutely.' She breathed.

His hands settled on her hips and pulled her in more closely, his tongue gently exploring her mouth until he broke away to look at her. 'I want this so much, I wish..'

Emily pressed her lips back against his. 'I don't. Whatever you were going to wish, I don't, I have all I want right at this moment.' She said.

She moved her hands to his waist and pulled his shirt from his pants, tugging against the buttons in order to push the shirt from his shoulders as he fumbled with the buttons of her blouse. Pushing the fabric away he brushed his fingers lightly over the lace of her bra. Leaning forward he pressed dozens of kisses to her pale skin, his breathing deep as he inhaled the warm scent of her. He pulled her closer to his body as she tightened her fingers in his hair and kissed the top of his head before pulling back and dropping to her knees in front of him.

Kneeling up she took his face in her hands and drew him into a deep kiss, her tongue searching his mouth deeply. Spencer could hardly think when she grazed his lip with her teeth and leaned back, smiling at him.

'Emily.' He gasped. 'Please, I want...'

Emily pulled away from him and pressed a butterfly kiss to his chest. 'Just tell me what you want.' She said.

'I want you.' He replied.

'Lay down.' She ordered.

Spencer pulled back and carefully moved back onto the bed, pushing his pants down as he did so.

Emily kicked off her shoes and shrugged her pants down leaving only her underwear and open shirt. Climbing onto the bed she straddled Spencer, keeping her weight off his body as she peeled back the straps of his brace. He turned his head so he wasn't looking at her. She gently pressed her palm to his cheek and guided him to look at her.

'Stop that. None of this matters, remember?' She leaned down and kissed him as he pushed his body up slightly, pulling the brace from beneath his back and dropping it onto the floor.

Emily leaned over the bed and pulled open the nightstand drawer. She retrieved a condom, dropped the foil packet onto his chest and leaned forward to gaze into his eyes. Spencer pushed her long hair away from her face and leaned up to kiss her.

'Is this ok.' She whispered. 'I mean, doing it this way, won't hurt you will it?'

Spencer pressed another deep kiss to her mouth. 'This is good, I'll show you.' He said as he kissed her again and she melted into his warmth.

* * *

As cliche as it sounded Emily knew that if she was still a smoker she'd definitely be lighting up right now. For the first time in her entire sex life her lover had been inside her head as well as her body. 'Spencer.' Was all she could gasp as she rolled away from him and stared at the ceiling, her mind a haze of endorphins.

If she was honest Emily would have to admit that she had expected to do all the work, to minister to Spencer, to take control. She was breathless with how wrong she had been.

His hands on her hips had possessed a strength that she hadn't estimated for at all. He'd held her masterfully, moved with her until all she could do was yield to the flow they created between them and brace herself on his muscular shoulders, her fingertips digging into the firm flesh. As she gasped his name more and more loudly he had taken her over the edge and now she was floating without any desire to come down.

As her eyelids grew heavy she found herself smiling and reaching for his hand amongst the tangle sheets. She didn't have to search much; he was already reaching for her.

* * *

Despite the vague ache in his lower back and the mattress that wasn't really hard enough for him Spencer was content. Emily was snuggled against him, her head resting lightly on his chest, her fingers running idly up and down his abdomen.

'Imagine if we could stay here forever.' Emily said.

Spencer frowned. 'That wouldn't make any sense. We'd have to get up at some point for water and eventually food not to mention the bathroom.'

Emily sat up and looked at him. 'It's a romantic daydream not a genuine suggestion.' She laughed.

Spencer reached up to her and ran his fingers through her hair.

'So, do you want to tell me what was wrong earlier?' She asked.

Spencer brushed her cheek and smiled as she kissed his palm. He shook his head and his brow crinkled into a frown.

'Morgan shared something with me, something that I really can't share with you because it would break his trust but it made me realise that the team, us, we're not impervious. I mean we fight the bad guys and I took for granted that we couldn't be caught out by them, but we can Emily, we can.' He said.

Emily ruffled his hair gently and swooped down to kiss his nose. 'Nothing is going to happen to us, you hear me? Nothing.' She swung her legs off the bed and pulled the sheet around her as she headed for the bathroom.

* * *

The next day proved to be much better for Mike Rawlins. He'd initially been despondent over the news that Spencer Reid could no longer be found at the university. He'd spent the previous night working his way through a six pack in his room and had then rung Harper, his maudlin state causing him a sleepless night after the call ended. He had been on the verge of throwing in the towel with his cousins work crew and getting back on the next plane to Vegas. That was until he got the message on his cell. The college administrator had called back.

'_Hello sir, this is Miranda Jeffries with the Georgetown University Administration Department. You called yesterday regarding Professor Reid. We just had confirmation that he will be running an FBI recruitment lecture at the University tomorrow. The lecture will be running between one and three pm in the Harvey Milk Lecture Theatre. Please don't hesitate to call back if you require more information or if you would like us to pass your number to Professor Reid when he is on campus tomorrow.'_

This was really good news but one thing troubled Mike. Why the hell was Nervous Wreck Reid running a recruitment lecture for the goddamn FBI?

**CMCM**


	17. Chapter 17

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

Some dialogue taken from S4;E8

**I am constantly amazed and humbled by all your alerts, favourites and reviews.**

AN - After I posted the last chapter I realised that while I had changed the rating to reflect the content I did not warn readers at the start that the content and rating had changed. All the reviews I got were positive but I would like to take this opportunity to apologise if anyone was offended by the lack of warning.

**Chapter Seventeen**

**The Consultant**

Reid was distracted enough not to register the awkward silence in the SUV as Rossi drove them to their recruitment seminar at Georgetown University. Even with the new ache in his back his mind was elsewhere. A certain part of his male anatomy had _almost_ been elsewhere as he started to think about the previous two nights spent with Emily and he'd spent an uncomfortable five minutes, eyes closed, thinking of Strauss in her underwear, until he had himself back under control.

Emily made him feel like a horny teenager, or at least how he imagined a horny teenager would have felt, how _he_ should have felt if he hadn't been years younger than his contemporaries, studying for multiple doctorates _and_ confined to a wheelchair for significant chunks of his teen years.

He'd spent the previous night at Emily's and it had been a replay of the night before. They hadn't talked about or planned for it, they just shared a ride back to Emily's apartment after work, ate, watched the discovery channel and then went to bed together.

Ever since they had made love Reid felt as though something had snapped into place and now that it had he couldn't imagine not having this woman in his life. It both exhilarated and terrified him simultaneously.

He had to smile to himself when he thought of them _making love. _He had been truthful when he told Morgan that he'd had previous sexual experiences but that was all they had been, experiences, enjoyable but perfunctory, the end goal being climax for himself and his partner and nothing more. He had never _made love_ before and he had never woken up with a woman in his bed before and it was this that really compromised his emotions. His previous experiences had taken place in hotel rooms with one party leaving soon after the act and while it was nice it only left a short term feeling of happiness and satisfaction because he knew that one thing was a certainty in his life; He _always_ woke alone.

Emily changed that. The morning after he slept with her he awoke to the tickle of her hair on his chest and the warmth of her arm as it lay across his stomach. He couldn't help but smile to himself in the peace of the moment, the early morning light filtering through the curtains, the outside world gray and uninviting, the inside of the room, the bed, warm and safe. She hadn't given any indication that she was awake until he felt her smile against his skin.

'_I can hear you thinking_.' She'd said.

He had swallowed a lump in his throat as he looked down at her hand snaking beneath the covers to tease his morning erection and for the first time in his life he knew what the concept of _home_ felt like. It was in a bed, with Emily.

Reid fiddled with the strap of his messenger bag and fixed his gaze on the road ahead. He could feel the faint crackle of sweat break out onto his forehead as he realised something for the first time. He was in love.

Rossi cleared his throat. 'You nervous about the lecture hot shot?' He asked.

Reid blinked away his panic and looked at Rossi. 'Um, no, not really, I mean it's not what I'm best at but, well, I've lectured many times before, well, in different fields so...um...'

'Tell you what, why don't I captain the ship and you just tag along for the ride.' Rossi smirked.

'Hotch wants me to present the consultancy role to the students. I _have_ to speak.' Reid crossed his arms around his stomach and slid further down into his seat. The interior of the SUV sank into silence again until Rossi cleared his throat and spoke.

'How is it that you were a teacher if you can't deal with the lecturing side of it?' Rossi asked.

'I didn't want to just research or end up stuck in a think tank somewhere, I wanted to make a difference that I could actually see. I perceived teaching as the best way to do that at the time.' Reid said.

'Until the sainted Jason Gideon picked you out at one of these seminars.' Rossi said.

Reid raised his brows at the tone in which Rossi mentioned his friend's name. 'Should I just assume that you don't like Gideon either?' Reid said.

Rossi let out a short laugh. 'Do I dislike Gideon? Not at all. He and I go way back, started this whole shebang together with a couple of other Agents, no I don't dislike him, he's one hell of a profiler and a good man where it counts but he's also one of the most ruthless manipulators of people I have ever met.'

Reid fidgeted with his sleeve and cleared his throat. 'He was always very kind toward me.'

'Of course he was. He wanted something from you.' Rossi said, bluntly.

Reid swallowed hard and looked out of the window at the rushing scenery as Rossi continued.

'He used to cycle recruits in an out of that god awful bunker we worked out of with the same regularity that most of us do laundry. The minute one stopped hanging on his every word a new one would turn up.' Rossi laughed. 'That was until good old Katie kicked his butt and told him she was sick of carrying his work load while he played the didact.'

Reid shifted in his seat. 'Katie Cole?' He asked.

'Katie Cole. One hell of an Agent and one hell of a drinker. Had me under the table a couple of times.' Rossi said as he shot Reid a suggestive smirk. 'Of course those annoying fraternisation rules didn't exist back then.'

'I heard that they were put in place _because_ of you.' Reid said waspishly, still smarting from Rossi's ruthless assessment of his and Gideon's relationship.

'Bull! No one cared who was screwing whom until that ass Ryan rolled up.' Rossi exploded. 'You must have met him? Max Ryan? Great pals with Gideon so if Gideon thought you were a shining star he wouldn't have been able to resist showing you off to Max, retired or not.'

Reid shifted uncomfortably. 'I met him, once. He was doing a book tour.'

'Touting his Keystone Killer book?' Rossi asked.

Reid nodded.

'So, what did he do? He either ignored you and made you feel like shit, or hit on you when Gideon went to use the bathroom?' Rossi said. Reid opened his mouth to protest but Rossi cut in. 'Ha! Knew it. He hit on you. You're his type. Did he give you the spiel about the job ruining his marriage? Yeah, like hell, it was his inability to get out the fuckin' closet that ruined his marriage.'

'He did both actually, ignored me and _then_ hit on me. He made me feel very uncomfortable.' Reid said eventually.

'Well if it's any consolation I've punched the bastard a few times over the years.' Rossi laughed.

Reid couldn't stop his mouth from quirking into a quick smile.

'And one other thing, I don't hate you kid, I haven't made my mind up about you yet but either way I don't hate you. In fact you rather impressed me back in Philly.' Rossi said as he took the campus turnoff.

Reid couldn't help but shoot Rossi a hopeful look. 'Really?' He asked.

Rossi grinned. 'There's the kid Gideon recruited!' He laughed.

Reid scowled and closed his mouth with a snap.

* * *

Mike wiped his hands on his pants and set off up the vast flight of stairs to the Harvey Milk lecture theatre. He was late but that didn't matter. All he wanted was to slip in quietly, stay close to the back of the auditorium and not get noticed. The last thing he wanted to do was spook Spencer before he'd had a chance to do what was needed. The last thing he wanted was to give him the advantage or a way to avoid him as the room emptied.

As he reached the heavy double doors Mike wiped his sweaty palms again and gritted his teeth. Pulling the door open he stepped into the back of the auditorium, holding his breath in the quiet half light, as a thready and tremulous voice filled his ears, rushing him straight back to a twilight evening on a Vegas high school football field.

'Most of us have done extensive postgraduate work in areas of abnormal psychology and sociology as well as intensive study of relative case work and associated case literature.' Reid said as he leaned forward in his chair, elbows resting on the table in front of him, his hands twisting together.

Rossi smiled at the alarmed looking students. 'But that's after selection to the unit. First you have to be either an Agent working the field or have a relevant speciality that makes you eligible to be a Consultant, and that's what we've talked about, for the Agent route the academics are wide open, everyone in this room, once you graduate, regardless of your course of study, is eligible to apply to the FBI.' Rossi said.

'What did you study?' One of the students asked Rossi.

'Criminal justice, but sports appreciation was all full up at my community college.' Rossi joked, gesturing to Reid to add his fields of study as the students laughed.

'Ah, ah...I hold doctorates in chemistry, mathematics and engineering as well as BA's in sociology and psychology.' Reid said.

The room fell silent.

'How old are you?' One student asked.

Reid looked up to find the speaker, his eyes lighting on a pretty, dark haired girl who waved a hand slightly to get his attention. He was about to speak when he noticed the door opening at the back of the auditorium and a man enter. The lighting made him squint, the figure nothing more than a heavy silhouette. He couldn't see the man's face but his presence made Reid stumble over his words.

Rossi turned from where he was perched on the corner of the table to look over his shoulder. 'Reid.' He whispered.

Reid blinked and returned his gaze to the speaker. 'Ah, I'm twenty seven, as of last month I turned twenty seven...um,...um...I'm also completing an additional BA in philosophy.' Reid finished, glancing back at the figure in the back of the theatre. Swallowing he shot Rossi a look that begged him to fill the silence created by his list of academic achievements and his age.

Rossi cleared his throat. 'So does anyone have any questions?'

'Did you ever shoot anybody?' One of the students asked Rossi, dumbly.

* * *

Mike held his breath as he watched Spencer Reid answer one of the student's questions. He wasn't listening to the words, he was transfixed, staring at the man in front of him. The kid had grown but he sounded _exactly_ the same and looked similar enough to be easily recognised and he was _right_ _here_, little Spencer Reid, _Nervous Wreck Reid_, comfortable and happy, he'd moved on, while Harper, his beautiful Harper was killing herself with guilt, over _him_. He looked fine, healthy, as he sat behind the large wooden table, holding court over a room full of kids, just like he tried to at high school, always first with an answer, always first with his test papers.

Mike suddenly dragged his gaze away from Reid. He found himself shaken by the strength of the anger that coursed through him and at the same time ashamed as he imagined what Harper would say to him, how she would tell him that what they had done was wrong, how what they had done warranted an apology, some attempt at reparation.

Quietly he stood and moved toward the door, yanking at the handle. He couldn't do this, he couldn't face him.

He stumbled out of the lecture theatre and grabbed onto the railings that over looked the atrium far below. Taking a few deep breaths he steadied himself and straightened up.

'You _can_ do this, you can do it for her. I can do it for you, baby.' He muttered to himself as he turned to face the lecture room doors.

* * *

'Who knew these kids would have so many questions.' Rossi grumbled to Reid as the last few students filed from the lecture hall.

'Never happened at my lectures.' Reid said. 'But then my TA always complained that he was bombarded by my students asking him for help for the first hour after each class. I think they just didn't get me.'

'Now there's a surprise.' Rossi snarked back as he gathered his papers and notebook.

'Ha Ha.' Reid muttered beneath his breath as he pushed himself up and slowly followed Rossi out of the room.

His back had graduated from its dull ache and was now sending out warning spasms. Spending two active nights in a softer bed than usual, an hour in the SUV followed by two hours seated on a hard chair had taken its toll. He drew in a sharp breath as a slice of pain numbed his left leg.

'You ok?' Rossi asked, turning back to face Reid.

Reid stopped and steadied himself, avoiding Rossi's gaze as he rotated his left foot and carefully set it in front of him.

'Seriously, I'm not _that_ much of an ass. You need a moment we'll make time.' Rossi said as he stepped closer to Reid, his face showing genuine concern.

Reid shook his head. 'I'm good.'

'Yeah, you're so good you're white as a sheet.' Rossi said. 'What do you need?'

'Nothing, really, we should get going, Hotch wants us back for Anderson's telephone consult at five.'

Rossi gave Reid an appraising look before he moved to get the door. 'I know. Why else do you think I'm stalling?'

Reid rolled his eyes and followed his colleague out.

* * *

The students had finished exiting the lecture theatre and as the last couple straggled out Mike shoved his hand roughly through his hair and moved forward to wait.

It wasn't long before he saw Agent Rossi pushing though the doors. Mike steadied himself, half stepping forward in anticipation. The older man turned and held the door, talking as he did so, Reid following him out slowly.

'Spencer..' Mike called before his voice died in his throat. Standing motionless in the middle of the hallway, he stared at Reid. He didn't look so healthy now that he wasn't sitting behind the desk. He was leaning forward, heavily, on two canes, his face pale and pinched even as he rolled his eyes and smiled slightly at something Agent Rossi said to him.

'Shit...I didn't..._Reid_? _Spencer Reid_?' Mike stuttered as he walked closer to Reid and Rossi. Both men looked up at him.

'Can I help you?' Rossi said as he stepped a little in front of Reid as Mike approached.

'I...no I...needed to speak to Spencer.' Mike leaned around Rossi and stared at Reid. 'I don't know if you remember me but I...we used to...'

Reid's brow crinkled into a small frown. 'I'm sorry, do you have a question about the lecture?' He asked openly.

Mike felt his mouth drop open. He didn't recognise him. Reid had no idea who he was.

'We have another appointment but we have left comprehensive literature in the auditorium which includes all the Academy admissions procedures if you want to make an enquiry.' Reid said as he dropped his gaze and moved to turn away.

Before Rossi could react Mike grabbed at Reid's arm, jerking him back.

'Wait.' Mike said.

Reid stumbled and one of his canes slipped from his hand.

With one hand Rossi grabbed onto Reid's shoulder and with the other he snagged a handful of Mike's shirt.

'Step back.' Rossi ordered.

Mike swallowed hard and stepped away.

Satisfied that Reid wasn't going to fall, Rossi turned his full attention to the man who'd grabbed at his partner. Narrowing his eyes he stepped closer to Mike.

'Now, you're going to pick up his cane, pass it to him and apologise.' Rossi said evenly, his hand still tight against Mike's chest. 'Do you hear me?'

Mike nodded and pulled back out of Rossi's grasp. He grabbed the cane from the floor and pressed it into Reid's empty hand.

For a second their eyes met and Mike forgot everything he had planned to say. 'I'm sorry. I'm _so_ sorry.' Was all he could manage to say before turning and roughly shoving his way through the break time throng of students.

Rossi watched as the guy retreated. 'Friend of yours?' he asked Reid.

Reid shook his head, his chest heaving as he tried to get his breathing under control. 'No.' He said.

'Huh.' Rossi said. 'And you're ok, he didn't hurt you?'

Reid shook his head as he stared down the busy hall.

* * *

'Anderson was good on that consult. He has a lot of original takes on the situation.' Emily said as she stacked her files neatly and grabbed her coat and purse.

Reid was slowly packing his bag, his hip leaning hard against his desk.

Emily stopped what she was doing and watched him carefully. 'You ok?' She asked. 'Spencer.' She said more loudly.

'What?' He asked, finally looking up at his girlfriend.

'I asked you if you were ok. You've been quiet ever since you got back this afternoon. Everything ok with Rossi?' She said.

Reid smiled. 'Yeah, it was fine, really.' He turned his attention back to his bag, shifting awkwardly to loop the strap over his head and shoulder before taking up his canes and looking up.

'So...um, do you want to... did you have any plans?' Reid said quietly, glancing over at Morgan who was turning his computer off and pushing his chair under his desk.

Emily leaned forward over the desk partition. 'Well I was hoping to have a date with this really hot guy I've been seeing. I don't know if he's free though. It is Friday night and he may already have plans.' She whispered.

Reid frowned and stared at Emily for a moment.

'She means you, genius.' Morgan said his voice loud in his ear, making both Reid and Emily jump. 'I don't think he does subtlety Prentiss.' Morgan grinned widely as he headed for the elevator. 'Have a good weekend guys, especially you hot stuff.' Morgan laughed as he pointed at Reid and ducked into the elevator.

'Oh, thanks Emily, thanks for that. You know I'm going to have to put up with him calling me that now.' Reid complained.

Emily laughed as they headed for the elevator. 'There are worse nicknames Spencer. Earlier today Garcia was lamenting the fact that you're not an agent.'

'Why?' Reid asked.

'She wants to call you junior G-Man.'

* * *

Reid rested his forehead against the cool tile of the shower and groaned as he let the warm water sluice down his back. He loved spending time with Emily, in her bed, in her apartment but he really, _really_ missed his own shower.

Emily's apartment was set within a smart brownstone that housed an elegant interior. The bathroom boasted a roll top bath set on clawed feet that looked beautiful and filled Reid with dread. Luckily the apartment also had an en suite wet room just off the master bedroom. In here Reid could strip and stand directly under the shower head without having to climb into a tub or manoeuvre a sliding or folding shower door.

The pressure of the water was perfect and the room was always wonderfully warm and relaxing but he just wanted to sit down, to wash himself without having to lean against the wall, his palm braced flat against the tile as he carefully washed with one hand, his muscles never fully relaxing with the exertion of keeping himself upright on a wet tile floor.

'_Why didn't you just invite her back to your place, idiot?_' He said to himself as he shut the faucet off and leaned, dripping against the wall. '_Maybe because she's about thirty years too young for a place with a ramp leading to the door and support bars next to the wash basin._'

Reid sat himself on the toilet seat, rubbing a towel through his hair and down his chest. Closing his eyes he leaned back. He could hear Emily setting dishes out in the kitchen and the faint sounds of music. She was singing along to her i-pod. He felt a small smile tug at his lips as he visualised her in his mind, her warm lips, the shine on her hair as the sun caught it.

He could almost feel the suns warmth on his own skin when the face he was picturing changed amid a swirl of dust motes that danced around Harper Hillman's face as her blond hair swung in front of him.

'_Come on Spencer. Alexa's waiting. Spencer!'_

* * *

'Spencer? Spencer are you done?' Emily called as she knocked on the door to the en suite. 'Takeout's here.'

The door swung open and Spencer, showered and dressed in his soft sweats, leaned forward and awkwardly hugged her, one of his canes swinging and banging into the back of her leg.

'Wow, if this is the kind of reception I get for ordering hot and sour soup I can't wait to see what happens if I actually cook.' She said.

'You can cook?' He mumbled into her hair.

'No.' She laughed. 'Come on. The sooner we eat the sooner we can sleep.'

* * *

They didn't sleep, not straight away. With Emily sat astride him they kissed for what, to Reid, felt like hours, as he inhaled the warm scent of her skin and savoured the slightly sweet taste of her lips.

'Is that you or your lip gloss?' He asked her as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

'All me. I _am_ the daughter of an Ambassador, we're naturally strawberry flavoured.' She said as Reid smiled up at her, her hands framing his face. 'I love looking at you like this.' She said. 'I was thinking all day that I wouldn't see you tonight.' She said, suddenly serious.

'Why?' He asked. 'If, as you say, you love looking at me like this then wouldn't you want to be with me?'

She ran the thumb over his brow and down the side of his face. 'Yes, but a part of me keeps telling me to slow things down, to keep some space for myself but then I think about the things we see and ...' She stopped abruptly, biting her lip.

'What?' Reid said.

'Gideon. I think about Gideon and Sarah. He always called her his _friend_ but it was clear that they were on the verge of being more and then an Unsub, a lousy _Unsub_, ripped all that away from him in under thirty minutes and given that kind of knowledge I find myself thinking to hell with slow and maintaining my own space. To Hell with it.' She said as she leaned down to kiss him.

Reid ran his hands up and down Emily's back before kneading her full breasts with one hand and cradling the back of her head with the other. He could almost taste her urgency. It was contagious and he couldn't hold himself back as he suckled greedily against her neck, grazing his teeth against the skin as she let out a low groan, her hand pressing between their bodies to find his already hard cock.

'Condom.' She breathed as she leaned over to the night stand and grabbed the foil packet. With practised ease she ripped the wrapper and slid the sheath onto him. 'I've never needed anything, anyone, this much before, why do I need you this much Spencer, _why_?' She gasped as she lowered herself onto his hardness before she was really ready, the slight burn in her muscles only spurring her on faster.

'I need you too Emily, god, I need you too.' He said as his fingers gripped her buttocks, pushing her down onto his body, relishing how deep he felt within her. 'I need you too.' He repeated again and again until he felt his breath catch, his balls tighten and Emily gasp out her orgasm around him.

She fell against him as they came simultaneously, her breasts pressing against his chest, her lips warm against his ear, he could hear her breaths as they turned into gasps of laughter, endorphins flooding her system.

Wrapping his arms around her Spencer tangled his fingers into her hair and pressed his face into her neck, his eyes screwed tightly shut. His chest was rising and falling rapidly, at first because of the physical exertion but after a moment because of the tears and anger he was fighting to hold back. It was some time before he felt Emily shift a little in his arms, her body relaxing into his and after a short while, when her breathing evened out he knew she was asleep.

He moved carefully to his left, angling his chest so that Emily gently slid away from his body. Quickly disposing of the condom he then grabbed one of his canes from where it was propped next to his side of the bed, leaned forward, hooked his sweat pants with the end of the stick and pulled them toward him. Quietly he levered himself to a sitting position on the side of the bed and started to pull on the soft pants. His back was aching terribly and he cursed under his breath as he remembered leaving his painkillers back in his apartment. Sighing he took both his canes and slowly pushed himself up. Gritting his teeth he walked out of the bedroom and down the hall toward the sitting room. A moment later he found himself staring out of the large picture window, hardly noticing the view of the Capitol.

He had no idea how long he'd been there when he heard Emily behind him. She placed her hand on his bare shoulder.

'You're cold.' She said.

Spencer nodded.

'Are you ready to tell me what's wrong?' She asked, stroking down his spine, her hand resting on the small of his back directly over the angry pink scar.

'I told Morgan that I had an accident.' He said suddenly. 'I tell everyone that I had an accident, I tell myself that, because it makes me feel less... less like a victim, less powerless I suppose.' He swallowed hard. 'It wasn't an accident, I...someone did this to me Emily, someone...someone made me like this.' He shook his head in the darkness and drew in a deep, wavering breath as more tears streaked down his face.

Emily moved to stand in front of him, her hands wiping away the wetness. 'Why now? What happened to bring this up now Spence?' She asked quietly.

'I saw someone.' He whispered.

'Who?' She said.

'Someone from my past.' He said. 'Today, at the lecture, I lied to Rossi, I told him I didn't recognise him, but I did. I couldn't exactly forget could I?'

'And this person, this someone has something to do with what happened to you?' Emily pressed gently.

Spencer nodded against her shoulder. 'What does he want?' He asked her almost pleadingly. 'What does he want?'

**CMCM**


	18. Chapter 18

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

Some dialogue taken from S3;E16 and S2;E01

**Thank you for all your alerts, favourites and reviews AND I am genuinely overwhelmed by the nomination for Best Alternative Universe in the CM Profilers Choice Awards. I really don't know what to say.**

**Chapter Eighteen**

**The Consultant**

Emily stood motionless as Spencer leaned into her, his head on her shoulder. She could feel the tension in his shoulders and the faltering of his breaths as he tried to control the emotion running through his body. She gently ran her fingers over the backs of his hands, the hard knots of his knuckles rigid and cool as he gripped the tops of his canes. Stepping back she caressed the side of his face and dipped her head to try to meet his eyes.

'Sit down.' She said, guiding him back to sit on one of the dining chairs. 'Wait there.'

She ran down the hallway and into her bedroom, hastily yanking at the comforter and mussed sheets she finally spotted Spencer's soft t shirt, grabbed it and ran back down the hall.

'Put this on. You're freezing.' She set to work pulling the jersey over his head, kissing him gently when she was finished. 'Come on, you have to do the arms yourself.' She said.

Smiling weakly up at her Spencer leaned his canes against the chair, pulled the shirt on the rest of the way and then leaned back, scrubbing at his face.

Emily gently caught one of his hands in hers. 'Hey, tell me.' She urged.

'I don't... I don't talk about this, I...I never talk about this, the accident...I mean I never did, even when it happened.' He whispered, his voice wavering.

Emily kneeled down in front of him still cradling his hand in hers.

'But you want to now?' She asked.

He shook his head. 'I've held it inside for so long. There was never any one to tell and now that I do have someone...you...I don't want you to know...I...I'm ashamed of ...' Spencer looked away from her and screwed his eyes shut.

'Spencer, I won't pass judgement or even comment unless you ask me to and we _never_ have to talk about it again if that's what you want.' She said. 'But right now, right now I think you _need_ to tell someone.'

Swallowing hard, Spencer nodded. Keeping his gaze away from Emily's face he took a deep breath and began.

'I was in the library and, ah, Harper Hillman comes up to me and she tells me that, ah...Alexa Lisbon wants to meet me behind the field house, Alex Lisbon's easily the prettiest girl in the school.' Spencer said, his voice shaking.

'What happened, Alexa wasn't there?' Emily asked.

'Oh she was there, so were the entire football team, they stripped me naked and dragged me out on to the field. So many kids were there, you know, just watching.'

'Nobody tried to stop them?' Emily said.

Spencer shook his head. 'I was struggling and I begged them, I begged them to, but they just watched. I pulled one of my arms free and I tried so hard to...' Spencer shook his head and swiped at his eyes. 'They pushed me. I lost my footing and I fell. I remember the grass was dry, like straw, it scratched my stomach and my arms.' He paused for a moment and frowned, concentration etched on his face. 'I guess they got sick of wrestling with me because they grabbed me by the hair and pulled me up. I didn't have time to get my footing and my legs weren't under me... I was half on my knees, so when one of them kicked me in my back the angle of my spine combined with angle and the force of the blow fractured two of my vertebrae.'

Spencer looked at Emily before looking away again. 'I remember I wet myself.' He said abruptly. 'They thought it was because I was afraid and it made them laugh even more, especially as the week before I'd splashed water on my shorts right before gym class and they thought...well, it doesn't matter, but I _wasn't_ afraid.' Spencer said, a little too defiantly. 'I simply...it was a basic physical response...I couldn't stop it from happening, my legs felt funny, numb I guess and... I was...I was...' He leaned back in the chair again and pulled his hand from Emily's. 'Anyway, they tied me to the goal post and left me there. Maybe if I'd had medical help as soon as the injury occurred, if they hadn't made me stand, if I hadn't continued to struggle, maybe things would be better now. I don't know.' He finished abruptly and raked his hands though his hair.

The dark apartment was silent. Emily felt as though everything in that brief moment of time had stopped until she felt herself sit back on her heels and draw in a shaky breath.

'And this man, the one who turned up today, he was the one who...' Emily faltered.

'I don't know, maybe. I never knew which one of them kicked me. I do know it was one of the football team. I remember feeling the studs on his boot.' Spencer said quietly.

Emily suddenly pushed herself to her feet and paced in front of her boyfriend her hands twisting in front of her. Her throat was thick with emotion when she spoke. 'I know I said I wouldn't comment or judge but dammit Spencer how can you call that an accident? They assaulted a _child. _We take down people like that!'

Spencer shifted awkwardly in his chair, his hand scrubbing his face. 'This is why ... look Emily, I can't forget it, ever. I want to but I can't, so what if it helps me to call it an accident? I'm not hurting anyone! No one cares!' He said angrily.

'No one cares? Spencer, I care and your mother, she must have cared? And you should care!' She said.

Spencer grabbed for his canes and tried to push himself up. His back sent a warning spasm of pain curling around his centre and he abandoned the movement with a sharp gasp. 'I _do_ care Emily, I care about not feeling like a victim every day can't you understand that? I don't _want_ to be a victim, I don't!'

Emily turned away from him and stared out of the window, her arms wrapped tightly around her stomach.

'Emily?' He said.

She turned back to him then, and dropping in front of the chair pulled him into a fierce hug, her tears wetting his neck and the collar of his shirt. Blindly she kissed his warm skin over and over again. 'Please tell me they paid for what they did, please god, _tell me_ they paid.' She cried.

Spencer hesitantly wrapped his arms around her and hugged her back. His throat tightened further and despite struggling against it he started, for the first time in his life, to cry in earnest for what had been done to him.

After a while Emily pulled back and smoothed Spencer's hair from his face, her palms drying his skin.

'What happened to them?' She demanded.

Spencer's gaze held hers. 'Nothing.' He said eventually.

'What do you mean nothing?' She asked.

'Campus security found me. They called an ambulance and I was taken to hospital. When they asked what happened I told them that I didn't remember.' He said.

'Why? Why would you protect them after what they did?' She said.

'You don't understand... I had to...I...' He stopped, leaning forward to grab Emily's hand. 'I had to.' He whispered. 'Remember, my mom, I told you that I took care of her right? If I'd drawn too much attention to myself, to us, they would have taken me away and you know the statistics on children in foster care Emily, I know you do.'

Emily shook her head. 'Couldn't something have been put in place to help you both, I mean if your mother was unwell couldn't you both have gotten help, you could still have made sure that those kids had justice served against them.'

Spencer shook his head. 'I couldn't tell anyone what had happened. It would have resulted in months of questions and prosecutions and my mom would never have held it together for that long. They would have removed me from the household. ' He said bluntly.

'I don't underst...' Emily started.

'My mother is a paranoid schizophrenic who'd forget to eat if she wasn't properly medicated and supervised.' He snapped. 'I had to protect her, if they found out how bad... I had to protect her.' He said finally. 'Sometimes...sometimes for short periods of time she could keep it together and when it happened, when she had to be at the hospital she pulled out all the stops, gave them a good show of being a capable parent but she would never have been able to keep it going for the length of time a court case would have taken and all I wanted was for it to all go away, to get back to ...normal.' Spencer laughed. 'Or whatever I thought normal was.'

Emily stared up into Spencer's eyes her hands framing his face. As fresh tears began to mingle with her fingers she leaned up and pressed a kiss to his forehead. Silently she stood and left the room, returning a moment later with his go bag and his socks and shoes. Kneeling in front of him she slipped on the footwear.

'Come on.' She said handing him his canes. 'You're tired and I can see that you're in pain. Let me take you home.'

'You want me to leave?' He said.

'No. I want to take you home. I want you to spend the night in your own bed so that you can fully relax and sleep. I'll be sleeping right beside you.' She said.

* * *

It was late when they reached Spencer's apartment. He didn't bother with the lights. He just locked the door behind them and led Emily down the hallway. He was exhausted and found himself grateful for Emily's silence as they both changed and got into his bed. For a while he lay staring at the ceiling, listening to Emily's even breaths in the dark next to him. He felt jittery, like a tuning fork that had been struck a dozen times. He couldn't process how he felt about telling Emily the truth about what had happened to him, he didn't know how to. He did know that she wasn't asleep, her breathing wasn't deep enough. She was most likely processing too he thought. Probably processing how she could get out of staying with him. Why would she want to? He was a mess.

'Stop it.' Emily said in the darkness.

Spencer swallowed thickly as Emily curled into his side, angling her head on the array of pillows that took up the top third of the bed. She ran her hand down the side of his face and then moved to kiss him. When she pressed her lips to his it was hard, possessive.

'Stop thinking, it's over now.' She said. 'And when you wake up in the morning _we_ will still be here. Telling me about the events in your life that have shaped you, good or bad, changes nothing about how I feel about you Spencer Reid.' She snuggled back against him, pressing a kiss to his neck and splaying her hand over warm dip of his bare stomach. 'And this guy, whoever he is, let him come, let him keep coming. We can take him on.'

* * *

Despite the emotional upheaval of the previous night and the lateness of the hour when she finally fell asleep Emily felt refreshed when she awoke. Slipping out of bed she turned, watching Spencer while he slept. He lay on his back, his shoulders, neck and head cradled by a network of support pillows. Reaching forward she brushed a lock of hair from his face. He wrinkled his nose and shifted slightly but didn't wake.

Emily padded out of the bedroom. She quickly used the bathroom and then made her way through the apartment until she found the kitchen. She needed coffee, badly. Once she had started the pot she took a moment to look around Spencer's home.

The kitchen wasn't big but it was bigger than most. It was functional, no clutter on the work surfaces apart from a knife block, microwave and the coffee machine. The refrigerator was huge but mainly empty apart from a canister of coffee grounds, some milk and a large bag of Reeses Peanut Butter Cups. Smiling Emily dug around in the bag and snagged one of the candies. Nibbling on the stolen chocolate Emily stepped around the breakfast bar and into the living room.

The flooring throughout the apartment was wooden. She'd expected it to be cold beneath her feet but it wasn't.

'No rugs.' She muttered to herself.

The living room, like the kitchen area was clutter free. Three of the surrounding walls were lined with bookshelves, the deep, warm wood matching the floor. They were crammed with books but only on the lowest three shelves. The higher shelves housed the occasional ornament, a couple of photographs but nothing else and the top shelves were all empty.

The chocolate leather couch had an end table at each arm, also neatly stacked with books and behind the couch was a massive metal reading lamp which seemed to grow from the floor and arch over the seating area, leaving a huge metal domed shade hanging overhead. It was the most modern thing in the room but it mixed perfectly with the warm woods and the soft leather of the couch. Opposite the couch was the largest recliner Emily had ever seen. There was a baby version of the huge floor lamp arching over the recliner and there was another small table next to the recliner. Emily could see Spencer's glasses strewn on top of a writing tablet along with a pen and an open book.

The coffee was ready and Emily went to the kitchen to pour a cup. 'Now where do you keep the mugs Dr Reid.' She asked herself.

She opened the wall cupboard closest to the coffee machine and was surprised to find it completely empty. She tried the next one and the next after that. All three were empty. 'Oookay.' She said as she pulled open the closest of the floor level cupboards. 'Bingo.'

She pulled out a mug and then full of curiosity opened all the lower level cupboards within the kitchen to find each one crammed alternately with grocery supplies and kitchen equipment. Shaking her head she grabbed the milk from the refrigerator and poured her coffee.

She was about to get comfortable in Spencer's recliner when she heard a phone ringing. Coffee in hand and sighing she jumped up. She really didn't want anything to wake Spencer, not after last night.

Halfway down the hall she realised that the ringing was coming from behind a doorway opposite the bathroom. Quietly she eased the door open and stepped into a small study. The landline was ringing on the desk. She was about to pick it up when the answer service kicked in.

'_Spencer, this is your mother. You know I'm not comfortable leaving messages on these machines. Anyway, please take the time to call me back. I'm worried about you. Oh and if Dr Norman makes things difficult for you when you do call just let me know and I'll scratch his eyes out. He's still bearing a rather childish grudge over that bed wetting epidemic. He seems to think I stirred things up.' _Emily jumped as she heard Spencer's mother let out an infectiously raucous laugh. _'Oh but baby it was worth it, it was worth it for you. Call me Spencer, and not when I have a class.'_

Emily stood in silence as the machine clicked off. So that was Spencer's mom. Her eyes wandered the desk for a moment. Like the shelves in the living room it was stacked with books. There were also a couple of files from the office. Flicking through them she saw that they were copies of cold cases from the archives. Smiling to herself she could picture Spencer coming home from a case only to carry on working when he got home. Next to the case files was a framed photograph. It was of a woman and a boy. The boy was small, smiling awkwardly from behind huge glasses as he sat in the woman's lap. They both looked happy. Setting the picture down Emily picked up another. This unframed photograph was of a group of students. One of them, a girl, held a banner that read _CalTech Mensa's. _Emily scanned the picture, taking in the faces of the half dozen students until she found the one she was looking for. Spencer was at the front of the group. He was sitting in a wheelchair, smiling up at an older student who was holding the chair. The man holding the chair was laughing. He was tall and dark and even though he was probably on just twenty he was sporting an impressive dark beard.

Emily turned the photograph over. On the back someone had written in looping script, _"A reed before the wind lives on, where mighty oaks do fall - Keep on rolling little Reid, Ethan."_

Emily fanned the picture over the scalding coffee and took a sip. She was about to leave the study when she saw a silver and black wheelchair in the corner of the room. She stopped abruptly and stared. The sight of the chair was a catalyst for several things clicking into place in Emily's mind. The floors free of all clutter and rugs, the higher kitchen cupboards devoid of anything and the topmost shelves bare. It was a living space organised by someone more comfortable in a wheelchair.

'Was the phone ringing?' Spencer said from behind her.

'Jeez Spencer.' She gasped as she jumped and her coffee slopped dangerously in the mug.

'Sorry. I didn't mean to make you jump. What are you doing in here?' He asked.

'Ah yeah, the phone. It was ringing and I didn't want it to disturb you so I...the machine got it, I would never have listened otherwise but I was in here and...' She petered out when she realised that she was waving the photograph in front of her. 'And clearly I'm just being really nosey and going through your stuff.' She finished, embarrassed.

Spencer studied her for a moment and then flashed her a broad smile. He pulled the picture from her fingers.

'Everyone in this group had a higher than average IQ.' He said.

'Do you still see them?' Emily asked.

'Some of them, yes. Allyson is a lecturer at Georgetown and Ethan, well he went his own way, he lives in New Orleans now. We still talk.' He said.

'He wrote the message?' Emily said.

'Yeah, he did. He thought it was funny that my name was Reid and I, according to him, was as thin as a reed and bent like a reed, whatever the situation.' Spencer said.

'And _is_ that your strategy for life, bend, don't break?' Emily asked.

Spencer leaned forward and kissed her gently. 'Thank you, for last night. For listening and bringing me home. I think I _was_ close to breaking.'

Emily set her mug down and found his fingers, her palms curling over his hands around the tops of the canes. 'Come on, I made coffee. Let's get some and I can test out that recliner of yours.' She said.

* * *

Mike Rawlins cradled the phone to his ear as he listened to his girlfriend run through her plans for the high school reunion. She sounded so much better than she had done recently that it made him feel as though he were talking to the old Harper. If he closed his eyes he could see her now, long hair swinging like a sheet of barley, laughing in her cheerleading outfit and his letterman jacket. The picture brought his thoughts back to high school though and that made him think of Spencer and the last picture he had of Spencer, struggling though the doors of the college auditorium as he navigated the walkway with his canes.

Mikes stomach clenched and he rolled off the bed, phone still clamped between his shoulder and ear.

'So baby, did you get the decorations fixed?' He asked.

'Of course I did and I got the band booked and they're gonna wear gold and maroon just like the team colours.' She replied proudly.

'It'll be great Harp, really it will.' He said.

'I've just got so much to do still, I don't know what to do next.' She said.

'Sweetheart, you have three months between now and the reunion. You have plenty of time.' He laughed. 'Anyway honey, I gotta go. I love you too.' He said, closing the cell.

Sitting back on the bed Mike grabbed his laptop and resumed his internet search. Grabbing a sheet of paper and a pen he quickly made note of the directions to Quantico and the FBI offices.

* * *

Emily dumped her coat and purse on her desk. Despite the bad start to the weekend both she and Spencer had ended up having a relaxing two days off and it almost hurt to ruin it by coming back to the office on Monday morning. They'd spent most of the time in his apartment. He didn't say much but Emily knew that Spencer was in pain, especially when she saw him shaking out two prescription painkillers from an orange drug store bottle. He'd looked ashamed when he noticed that she had seen him, offering up that he rarely took them. She told him again that he didn't have to apologise for managing his health. She wanted to ask him if he needed to use the wheelchair but something stopped her and she wasn't sure if it was because she didn't want to embarrass him further or if it was because she couldn't take seeing him in it.

Once the pills kicked in and he said he felt better they'd ended up in the park opposite the apartment. Spencer introduced her to some of his friends there, a crew of five ranging from elderly men to middle aged dads and a boy of around twenty named Eric, all of whom played chess. Spencer had declined a game and then endured a round of cat calls about him ditching them and the game for a girl. They were a nice group of people and Emily had enjoyed the company immensely.

That night they had take out in deference to Spencer's completely empty fridge and snuggled in bed watching DVD's on Spencer's ridiculously large flat screen that hung on the wall opposite his bed.

Sunday night she went home. She hadn't wanted to but her go bag was out of everything and she really needed to get some of her chores done and if she was honest she wanted a little time to think about what Spencer had told her on Friday night. She wanted time to think about the group of kids who had crippled him. She didn't have much on them but she did have two names.

'Hey, where's Mr Smokin' Hot this morning.' Morgan teased as he stepped into the bullpen.

'Hey Morgan, good weekend?' She replied.

'Very good thanks, so, where is he?' Morgan asked again.

'Consult with Hotch down in Counter Terrorism. They shouldn't be too long. You want coffee?' She asked.

'Sure.' Morgan said.

Emily hesitated. 'Do you want to help me get the pot started?'

'Ok?' Morgan said.

He followed her to the break room and started questioning her as soon as they got through the door.

'Now you really don't need me to help you with the pot so what's wrong?' He asked.

Emily took a deep breath and clasped her hands together. 'Has Reid ever talked to you about what happened to him in high school?'

Morgan shrugged. 'You mean his accident?'

Emily rolled her eyes. 'Yes, his _accident_.'

'We've talked. What's this about Emily?' Morgan asked.

'What did he tell you?' She said.

Morgan folded his arms. 'What he told me was in confidence Emily, I can't betray that. If you need to know then you should ask him about it.'

Emily shook her head. 'I don't need to ask him, he told me, and you're right it was in confidence so I can't say too much but what I can say is that it wasn't an accident.'

'Someone hurt him deliberately? Wait, he told me he was a kid when it happened.' Morgan said.

'He was. It was still a deliberate attack and one of the people responsible showed up at Rossi and Reid's recruitment drive last week. It really shook him up.' Emily said.

Morgan straightened up. 'What's Rossi said about it?'

'I think that Reid pretended he didn't know him and I haven't seen Rossi yet to ask. What I do know is the names of two of the others involved. Do you think Garcia would be able to find anything on them?'

'Woah, wait up.' Morgan said, his hands outstretched. 'Does Reid know you're getting all up in his business like this?'

'All up... Morgan, these people hurt him and they got away with it. I'm just trying to look out for him.' She said.

'And I get that, I really do, but Reid's a very private person, you know this. If he wants to dig it all up he'll do it himself. Now this guy hanging around, that's a whole other matter. I'll ask Rossi about it and I'll keep an eye out, but Emily I think going any further is a really bad idea.' Morgan said.

Emily turned and grabbed the coffee pot, sloshing some of the dark liquid into her mug. Suddenly she felt Morgan's hand on her shoulder.

'You care about him, I do too, but be careful Emily, he's not helpless, and if you try to treat him like he is he won't thank you for it.' Morgan said gently.

* * *

David Rossi was a happy man. His needs were basic really and they had all been fulfilled. He had spent a good weekend enjoying fine food and wine and the company of a lovely young woman named Estelle. He'd also managed to submit the final two hundred pages for his last book and his agent was, for once, happy with him. To cap it all off he had finally received delivery of the hand tooled Italian loafers he had ordered from Milan six weeks ago.

He was so happy and distracted that he almost missed the jerk pulling a rental car out in front of him until it was too late. Horn blaring he let down the window of his SUV and yelled three or four choice Italian curses toward the other driver.

'Shit! Five hundred yards from the goddamn office and this asshole nearly totals me.' He muttered as he wrenched the wheel around to skirt the stationery vehicle. Deciding that the other driver needed a Rossi glare in addition to the cursing he drove slowly past and glowered at the other driver. It was only when he'd reached the parking lot that it occurred to him that he'd seen the man before. It was the same jerk that had grabbed a hold of Reid at the recruitment drive.

Rossi narrowed his eyes and swiped at his beard, gazing at his reflection in the rear view mirror. It was a coincidence he thought to himself, and if there was one thing he didn't trust in this life it was coincidences.

**CMCM**


	19. Chapter 19

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

Some dialogue taken from S3;E07, S2;E14 and S1;E10

**Thank you for all your alerts, favourites and reviews.**

**Chapter Nineteen**

**The Consultant**

'Do you think the profile will help?' Reid asked Hotch as they stepped into the elevator.

'Maybe.' Hotch replied, tersely.

Reid looked down at his shoes and shrugged his shoulder in a vain attempt to inch the strap of his messenger bag into a more comfortable position. If he'd been sharing the car with Morgan or Emily he might have considered asking for help but not Hotch, especially when he was clearly in a bad mood.

The consult with Counter Terrorism had been awkward. Hotch had been professional of course, Reid would never expect anything else, but he had been sharp and irascible with the CT team and had breezed through the consult barely hiding his impatience with the other agents.

'They appeared open to our thoughts on Bancroft and the cell they suspect he's running.' Reid said tentatively.

'Maybe if they attended some of the seminars the unit gives on profiling they could have come up with some of the basics themselves and saved time.' Hotch snapped.

Reid raised his eyebrows and screwed his palms around the tops of his canes. 'Well, they're not profilers...' He said weakly.

'And we're not experts in counter terrorism yet we get pulled into their briefings.' Hotch said unreasonably.

Reid took a deep breath and willed the elevator to move more quickly. Hotch was invariably a serious man and always thoroughly invested in work, which made him a hard task master, but he wasn't usually so hard with his colleagues. Reid has seen him tear strips of unfortunate LEO's when they endangered members of the public or members of the team but he didn't usually act the way he had downstairs.

Reid glanced at Hotch. He was standing with his arms folded, glaring at the little red numbers detailing the elevators progress. His expression was thunderous.

Swallowing nervously Reid tried again. 'Are you alright?' He asked.

Hotch didn't move or acknowledge Reid's question.

Reid carried on. 'You seem unhappy.' He said.

Hotch glared at him then, 'I am unhappy. I'm tired of people not doing their job properly. Bear that in mind when you prepare for the Hardwick custodial. We have the approval and it's scheduled for next week, live cases permitting.' Hotch said as the elevator juddered to a halt, the doors slid open and Hotch swept out.

Reid walked carefully toward his desk, his anger rising by the minute. When had he ever not done his job properly? When had he ever displayed a lack of preparation for any work task, for _any_ task? Leaning his canes against his desk he pulled his chair out and lowered himself down. He yanked his messenger bag from over his head, shoved his hair out of his face and glared up at Hotch's office. He could see him through the open blinds. He was on the phone, speaking animatedly. Reid felt a brief rush of sympathy for whoever was on the line as he reached for the stack of archive files he had already requested on Chester Hardwick. Flipping open the top file he was greeted with a crime scene photo that was awash with blood. Hardwick was notorious for killing, messily, with whatever weapon was available and sometimes with no weapon at all, other than his bare hands. Flipping the file closed he leaned back in his chair and tried to work the cramps out of his back.

He needed to focus on Hardwick but it felt impossible. He slumped forward, his head in his hands. Thoughts of Mike Rawlins had plagued him all weekend. He had felt better after talking with Emily but reliving the event, Mike turning up and his mother calling and alluding to Alexa Lisbon again kept pushing old, unwanted memories to the fore and he was exhausted by them. Why couldn't they go away and leave him alone? Why didn't his own mother get that he didn't want to be reminded of things past? Wasn't the fact that he always refused to tell her who had been involved in his attack enough of a clue? Even when his mother had cast an appraising eye over him as he lay in his hospital bed and leaned in to tell him _"A mother always knows, Spencer."_ he hadn't given in and confirmed her suspicions but she had still mentioned both girls' names and still she mentioned them now, often wasting her brief periods of lucidity on them.

Flipping the file open again he stared at the bloody mess captured on camera. Sighing he flipped it closed again. If he was going to prepare for dealing with a horror of humanity like Chester Hardwick he needed coffee.

* * *

'So,' David Rossi began as he sat down opposite Aaron Hotchner and smoothed out his pant leg. 'Agent Todd informs me that her Unit Chief just had a new one ripped by SSAC Aaron Hotchner. Care to tell me why?' He asked.

Hotch stopped writing for a second and looked across at his old friend. 'I said and did nothing that the situation didn't warrant, Dave.' He said.

'Really? How are things with Haley.' Rossi said.

Hotch lay his pen down on the file he was finishing. 'And this is relevant to SSA Frost and Agent Todd how?' He asked.

'It's not. I just wanted to try and figure out what has your underwear in a knot.' Rossi said.

'It's none of your business. I don't make a habit of sharing my personal life with work colleagues.' Hotch said.

'Ouch, and that's supposed to offend me and make me leave right?' Rossi said.

Hotch stared at him for a moment. 'Yes.'

Rossi stood and headed for the door. 'You have a lot on your mind Aaron. Talking would be better than taking _work colleagues_ heads off, remember that.' He said.

* * *

'Hey.' Reid said as he entered the break room to find Morgan and Emily deep in conversation. 'Is that a fresh pot of coffee?'

'It's all yours kid.' Morgan said as headed for the door. 'Prentiss, remember what I said.' He said as he left the break room.

'Did I interrupt something?' Reid said.

'No, nothing at all.' Emily said as she took Reid's flask from him. 'Black or white today?'

'Black with lots of sugar. I think I need it after my early start with Hotch.' He said.

'Something wrong?' She asked.

'No, I ...I think Hotch is in a bad mood.' He said.

'Yikes, thanks for the heads up.' Emily smiled. 'Look, Spencer I was thinking about something.'

Reid raised his eyebrows and looked at her expectantly.

'Well, I was thinking about that guy, the one who turned up at the recruitment drive and I was thinking if you tell me his name I could get Garcia to do a quick search on him and the girls that you mentioned. We..'

'What? You want to do what?' Reid's voice rose a couple of octaves.

'I... I just thought we could make sure that this guy's not hanging around for any specific reason.' Emily said.

'Reason? Emily, I don't care what reason brought him to Georgetown, I want him out of my head and Harper and Al... You _said_ you wouldn't comment and that if I didn't want to talk about this again I didn't have to, you said that and I trusted you to...did you tell Morgan?' He asked suddenly, his eyes narrowing.

Emily hesitated. She had never seen Spencer level such a cold look at her. 'No, Spencer, of course I didn't go into any detail...'

'Oh! What, you didn't go into any detail but you gave him the rough outline? You had no right Emily, I...I confided in you, this is, you know this is exactly what I get when I trust someone, it gets thrown back in my face!'

'Spencer I didn't tell...' Emily reached out for Reid's arm but felt her hand being shaken off as he turned and struggled out of the break room leaving his flask of coffee and Emily behind.

* * *

'Great Falls, Montana, over the past fourteen months three women have been reported missing. Michelle Lawford, Jennifer Hillbridge and Darcy Cranwell, all young, caucasian brunets. After an extensive search all were presumed dead by local authorities.' JJ said.

Emily's gaze flickered toward Reid as JJ talked through the preliminaries of the case. He didn't look up but kept his gaze on the file in front of him even though she knew he must have committed it to memory already.

'And now there's a fourth woman, Angela Miller.' JJ continued. 'She and her car went missing from a small grocery store while her husband and son were inside.'

This got Reid's attention. 'This morning?' He asked, setting aside the file.

'And Montana's requesting our help?' Rossi said.

'Forty minutes later state troopers spotted Angel Miller's car on the highway.' JJ said.

'And when troopers tried to apprehend the driver he blew himself up with a grenade, putting one of the troopers in the ICU.' Hotch said.

'Are they sure she wasn't in the car with him?' Reid asked.

'They went through the wreckage and it appears she's still missing.' JJ said.

'Troopers get a look at the guy?' Morgan asked.

'Caucasian, stocky, brown hair, moustache, early forties, he had a scar on the left side of his face.' JJ said.

'Do you think Angela Miller's still alive?' Morgan asked Hotch.

'Since the other missings were never found we don't know but he only had her for forty minutes so we have to assume she is.' Hotch said as he stood and strode from the room. 'Wheels up in thirty.' He called back to the team.

* * *

Sitting next to Reid on the jet Emily was acutely aware of how close her thigh was to his and also of how angry he still was with her. He hadn't spoken when they collected their go bags from their desks and had declined her help when she offered to help him carry the Hardwick case files he was struggling to fit in his case, and now he was concentrating a little too hard on marking colours on a map of the area they were going to.

'You know I coulda' gotten you a colouring book in the airport.' She teased gently.

Reid tensed and shifted his leg away from hers.

'I'm creating a topographical map and laying down and geo-coding all key locations looking for algorithms.' He said tersely.

'Yeah, that's exactly what I thought you were doing.' Emily said to herself.

'It's called a jeopardy surface and it's a way of narrowing down where the unsub could reside.' Hotch said.

'And by default where he may be stashing Angela Miller.' Reid continued.

'You know it says here the guy had a fully loaded gun so we know he had options, so why the grenade? Morgan asked.

'He wants to be remembered.' Rossi said. 'And he wanted to be sure to take as many cops with him as possible. He knows he's out gunned so he waits, times it to the last second and boom! There are some very committed people in those parts.' Rossi gestured towards Reid's map.

'Who love their fire power.' Hotch said.

'Almost as much as they hate us.' Rossi finished.

'The Militia.' Morgan groaned.

'And they're heavily armed.' Reid said.

'Yeah but hand grenades?' Emily said.

'Well, it's not uncommon for militia members to have military experience, often times they resent the structure and they get discharged and they form their own paramilitary governments.' Reid replied.

'Well the dental records are on their way to Garcia. I'll tell her to check the military records first.' JJ said.

Hotch nodded as he dipped a tea bag into his mug of hot water. 'We have an hour or so before we land. Get some rest.' He said.

* * *

Morgan waited until everyone was settled and the case files had been tucked away. Quietly he shifted from his seat and walked to the back of the jet where Rossi was sitting. Sliding into the seat opposite, Rossi stared at him and raised his eyebrows.

'What's up?' He asked.

Morgan glanced back over his shoulder to see Reid and JJ talking, Hotch reading his notes and Emily staring out of the window. 'Emily tells me that some guy showed up at the recruitment drive hassling Reid?' He said quietly.

Rossi nodded. 'He wasn't much, got a little too far in the kids face but Reid said he didn't know him. Why?'

'According to Emily he does know him and they have bad history.' Morgan said, his voice still low.

'Well that's not good.' Rossi said.

'Why?' Morgan said.

'I saw him again this morning. He cut me up right outside the building.' Rossi said thoughtfully.

* * *

Rossi leaned against the desk in the Great Falls police department and watched Reid wince as he balanced his weight on one cane while he fixed the evidence board with photographs of the missing women and Angela Miller. The kid has seemed a little off on the jet and the tension only started draining out of him when Hotch and Emily left to visit the Miller abduction site. As soon as Prentiss had left the kid seemed to relax a small bit, but still it wasn't enough for Rossi to bring up the man who had manhandled him at the recruitment seminar. He wasn't even sure that mentioning it was a good idea. His profiling skills told him that Prentiss had mentioned it and it hadn't gone over too well. Maybe if he got some alone time with him he could put some feelers out and get a bead on the situation. Then again, he thought to himself, maybe not. The kid was a private person and getting information out of him would be tricky at best.

'Hi this is Agent Jareau, I'm with the FBI...' JJ groaned and snapped her cell shut. 'That's the third time I've been hung up on.' She said, sighing.

'Try not saying FBI.' Rossi said.

JJ rolled her eyes and opened her phone as it started to ring. 'Go ahead Garcia.'

'You were spot on crime fighters, the military records match Francis Goering, forty two years old, did a year in the army before a bad conduct discharge a highlight of which was an arrest during a bar brawl in which three other people were hospitalised. He also appears in the federal database for, get this, aggressive militia groups.' Garcia said.

'You see a last known address?' Rossi asked as he pushed himself away from the desk and grabbed his jacket.

'A compound just outside of town, it's coming your way.' Garcia said.

'Good. Reid and I will go make friends with his neighbours.' Rossi said.

'What?' Garcia and JJ said in almost perfect unison.

'I said, Reid and I will go make friends with his neighbours. You coming kid?' Rossi asked challengingly as he moved past JJ and gestured toward Reid.

'But he can't go into the field!' JJ said. 'You can't take care of him and have your own back at the same time!'

Reid stopped what he was doing with the evidence board and stared at JJ. She caught his eye and immediately flushed a deep red. '_Take care_ of me?' He said.

'Reid I didn't mean...' She faltered as Reid scowled at her and shoved the last pin roughly into the corner of Angela Miller's photograph. He snatched up his discarded cane and glanced at Rossi. 'Let's go.' He said, glaring once again at JJ.

'Rossi, Reid, wait...' JJ called as she watched them leave the station house.

'JJ..!' Garcia breathed down the phone. 'What just happened? Please tell me that Agent Rossi did not just take our Reid into the field, into the potentially _dangerous_ field? JJ..._JJ_?'

* * *

The compound was run down. A dust bowl of beat up pick up's and trailers with a scattering of kids playing and stray dogs. Rossi eyed the inhabitants as he manoeuvred the SUV over the low bridge that separated the area from the dirt road, taking in the men stabling the horses and the women watching, all in the shadow of the mountain. Pulling up in front of the first dwelling, a trailer that had an add on making it almost a full sized house, Rossi bit down on the small wisp of doubt that snaked in his gut.

The whole place _was_ pretty isolated and if anything did start to stir up he was pretty much on his own. Belatedly he paused to consider that Hotch was going to have a field day tearing him a new one over this little stunt. Watching Reid carefully gather his canes and slowly shift to get out of the SUV didn't make him feel any better.

He was about to ask Reid if he wanted to stay in the vehicle when he noticed the set of the other mans' face. He had opened the door and was leaning his canes against the outside of the vehicle. He grabbed the handle above his head and eased his body around to shift his legs until his feet were resting on the ground. His jaw was set and Rossi could clearly fine lines of pain around his eyes, pain that he was practiced in living with.

Rossi swiped at his goatee and belligerently swallowed down on the curl of doubt. Screw Hotch, and JJ for that matter. Reid was a man, not a boy, and he had the right to be treated as such, his whole shitty life gave him that right, Rossi thought to himself.

'You go knock kid, I'll be right behind you.' Rossi said.

Reid looked back at him, surprise on his face. 'You're sure?'

'We're just going to talk Reid, take a look at Goerings place. We're not here to mount the next Ruby Ridge.' Rossi said.

Reid rolled his eyes and steadied himself on the adverse camber of the ground. Leaving the door of the SUV open he stepped carefully toward the trailer. His hands were slick with sweat around his canes, a combination of the heat and his own nervousness. He knew that he should have told Rossi that he couldn't go with him, he knew the terms of his employment and he _had_ almost said no but then JJ had jumped in with that comment.

He walked slowly but purposefully toward the door and took a deep breath which failed to calm the fizzing nervousness of his stomach.

'_You can do this, it's just a conversation and you are not helpless.' _He muttered to himself as he navigated the step. Leaning on one cane he used to other to knock on the door jamb, avoiding the many posters adorning the wood. _"No Solicitors", "Keep Montana Armed" _He read as he waited.

'What the hell do you want? Can't you read?' The manager said as approached the screen door.

'I'm not a salesman, I'm with the FBI.' Reid said.

'FBI? You're not serious? You look like a pipe cleaner with eyes, not to mention, damn, you really need to walk with those?' The manager nodded toward Reid's canes. 'You're what The Man has protecting the country these days?'

Reid frowned at the man as he carried on.

'I could snap you like a twig.' The manager said.

'But then he isn't alone.' Rossi said stepping up to stand next to Reid. 'We're here because this was the address listed for Francis Goering.'

'I haven't seen him in months.' The manager snapped.

'We'd like to see his residence.' Rossi replied.

'I'll show you his place.' The manager said reluctantly as he pulled open the screen door and slunk down the steps, glaring at Rossi as he passed. 'A piece of advice FBI, you keep bringing the pipe cleaner on the job with you, you're begging for someone to take him out.'

'Don't worry about him, he'll do just fine.' Rossi said, jerking his head dismissively toward Reid.

* * *

Aaron Hotchner was hot. The sun out at the grocery store where Angela Miller had disappeared had been searing and spending the last two hours there with the LEO's and Angela's husband and son had taken its toll on his humour. The little boy had made him think of Jack and thinking of Jack had made him think of Haley, Haley and those damn divorce papers sitting on his desk. He should have signed them as soon as he got them, that's what he normally did with outstanding paperwork.

Sighing he pulled open the door to the station house and waited for Emily to move past him. She had also been quiet in the SUV, neither of them in the mood to talk. All Hotch wanted to do was get Angela Miller back and get this case closed so he go home and argue with Haley over spending two hours with his son.

'Let's put what we have together with the evidence board and see how far Reid's got with the geographic profile.' He said to Emily as they walked toward the area set aside for the team.

Hotch removed his jacket and draped it over the back of one of the chairs just as JJ came rushing back into the room.

'The police officer died in ICU a couple of hours ago.' Hotch said. 'JJ, I need you to arrange for me to speak to his widow and I need Reid to update me on the geographic profile.'

Hotch looked up when JJ didn't reply straight away. 'Is something the matter?' He asked, raising a brow toward her.

JJ fingered her necklace and glanced at the clock.

'JJ?' Hotch repeated.

'Ah, sorry sir, I'll call Officer Franks' widow right away.' She started to move away from the table when Hotch called her back.

'Where's Reid?' He asked.

* * *

Reid held back a smile as he pulled the door to the SUV closed and settled back into the deep leather seat. His fingers drummed quickly on the strap of his messenger bag and he started talking before Rossi had even closed his own door.

'It made everything so much more complete, just the act of being able to take in the subject of a profiles' living space, his base for all his core needs. I mean I know that Goering hadn't used this particular address in a while and it was mostly stripped of all but the most basic of accoutrements but it still gave a wider framework to build a character assessment from.' Reid rushed, a smile forcing its way across his face. 'It made the whole thought process I employ when creating the profile so much more tangible!'

Rossi glanced at his companion as he drew out of the compound and floored the gas. 'Glad you had fun kid.' He said.

Reid glanced down at his lap and fidgeted with the strap, creasing it in his palm. 'Thanks Dave, I mean...well, thanks.' He said, looking at Rossi from behind his bangs.

Rossi kept his eyes on the road. 'Just helping you do your job kid.'

'I wish...'Reid stopped and turned his head to stare out of the window.

'What?' Rossi said.

'I wish I could do this on every case, I know I can't but, well, I wish I could.' He said.

'Yeah, well if Hotch leaves any skin on us when we get back maybe we can.' Rossi fumbled around the centre console until he found his sunglasses. Shaking the soft cover onto his lap he flicked out the arms and jammed them onto his face.

'Did you mean it, what you said back there, about me being able to look after myself, do you really think that?' Reid said.

Rossi shrugged. 'You're a genius who went to college at some stupidly young age which means you had to have hit high school pretty early too. You don't have to be a profiler to figure that a disabled, academically advanced kid who has the physique of a long streak of water would need to have some tricks for survival up his sleeve. Like I said, I bet you do just fine Dr Reid.'

'Thanks, I think.' Reid said as he pulled his own sun glasses out of his bag and put them on. Grinning he leaned his head back and let the sun warm his face.

'Geez kid, what with that five mile smile and the brand new fire in your gut, you're just about blinding me here. Good job I pulled out the shades.' Rossi said, as he smiled too.

* * *

Hotch wasn't smiling. He was pacing. While he paced Emily, Morgan and JJ hovered around the table and the evidence boards, each of them pretending to be addressing something to do with the case whenever Hotch looked in their direction.

'How long have they been out there now?' Emily said to JJ.

'Five minutes longer than the last time you asked.' JJ said.

'Hey, don't snap at me, I wasn't the one who let Rossi walk out of here with Reid.' Emily said.

'And I was supposed to stop him? Emily, Spencer is an adult, he shouldn't have gone with him, he should have said no. It's not my job to babysit him, and anyway I told Rossi he wouldn't be able to watch out for Reid and cover his own back at the same time!' JJ said.

Morgan blew out a long breath and scrubbed his hand over his head. 'You said that, in front of Reid?'

JJ sighed and rubbed her stomach. She felt hot and queasy. 'It didn't come out the right way.' She said. 'Excuse me, I need to use the bathroom.' She mumbled.

Morgan pushed away from the table and glanced at Emily as he stood in front of the evidence boards. 'Let's just get back to the profile, let Hotch concentrate on Reid and Rossi.'

* * *

Rossi hadn't even removed his jacket before Hotch appeared in front of him.

'Dave, a minute, please.' He said and walked back into the privacy of the sheriff's office.

Rossi took in the stares of his team mates and shrugged, disappearing with Hotch into the dim office by the time Reid made it through the front doors.

* * *

'What were you thinking?' Hotch asked, his arms firmly crossed.

'I was thinking we'd go find out about Goering from his place of residence.' Rossi replied.

'Don't play smart with me Dave, you know what I mean.' Hotch snapped.

'I was thinking the kid could use his skills someplace other than this sweat box, that he could broaden his talents and, god forbid, maybe I was thinking that we could treat him like an adult.' Rossi said.

Hotch's eyes narrowed. 'I treat the members of my team fairly. I neither coddle nor neglect them Dave, I use them to the best of their talents and within the boundaries of their capabilities. Reid is a Consultant, not a field Agent and he is treated as such.'

'_Within the boundaries of his capabilities_.' Rossi parroted Hotch's words back at him.

'In regards to levels of training, Dave. Do not suggest that this is purely about his disability. He is a Consultant because he is not trained as a field agent and like any bureau Consultant he isn't insured to be in the field!' Hotch said, his voice raised.

'Nothing happened, Hotch, you're blowing this out of proportion.' Rossi snapped back.

* * *

Reid glanced nervously toward the office. He could hear Hotch's voice slightly raised and although he couldn't hear what was being said he knew Rossi was taking flak from Hotch and he knew why.

'Come on kid, tell us about Goering's place.' Morgan said, tapping Reid on the shoulder.

'Oh, right.' Reid replied.

'Yeah, let's see if it was worth the risk.' Emily muttered.

Reid frowned and turned to her. 'Are you angry with me?' He asked.

Shaking her head she turned back to the evidence board.

Reid turned his attention back to the office and Hotch's voice. 'This is ridiculous.' He said to himself as he made his way toward the office.

* * *

'You've been in a crappy mood for days Hotch, why don't you just talk to me about...'

'Don't you dare make this about me and Haley.' Hotch said. 'This is about you and your ...' Hotch stopped abruptly as the door opened and Reid side stepped into the room, pushing the door closed behind him.

'Reid, I'll talk to you later.' Hotch said, glaring.

'Hotch, sir, please don't blame Agent Rossi, I asked him to take me out.' Reid said.

Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose. 'I'll choose to ignore that blatant lie Reid. Our focus is the case and retaining some professionalism in front of the LEO's. I will not devote any more time to this right now. Dr Reid you are a Consultant and you are aware of the terms of your employment. You are not insured to be out in the field. Until I decide otherwise you will work with Garcia, you will not leave the bureau unless it is to attend custodial interviews with me.'

Rossi stood up abruptly. 'What, you're the only one who can keep the team safe, is that it Hotch? Is this a pissing contest?'

'No contest Dave. I'm Unit Chief and as such what I say goes. Both of you should think yourselves lucky that I don't write you up to Strauss.' Hotch said as he wrenched the door open and strode out.

* * *

Morgan watched Emily as she stared at the office door and chewed on her thumbnail. She hadn't said anything since Reid had gone into the office but from the set of her shoulders Morgan could tell that she was angry, angry and scared.

'Hey, he's a grown man you know.' Morgan said softly.

Emily turned to him and grabbed for one of the case files before sitting down. 'I know that Derek.' She said.

'So treat him like one, yeah he messed up and yeah he and Rossi could have got into a little trouble out there, but that's on them. You're not his mom Emily and he doesn't need you to be.'

Before Emily could reply the office door opened and Hotch strode out, cutting a path through some of the local officers until he reached the front doors which he shoved open, disappearing into the sun.

Shaking his head Morgan pulled his cell phone out and dialled. 'Baby girl, yeah, listen I think we're gonna need to organise a team drink when we get back, a big one. Can you handle it? That's my girl.' Morgan grinned as he snapped the cell shut.

**CMCM**


	20. Chapter 20

**For Disclaimer; See Chapter One**

This is for Yana, for sowing the seed of the Garcia/Kevin back story, months and months ago.

**A/N - 06/05/12 - This chapter has been edited to water down scenes of an adult nature. When the whole story is complete it will be posted in it's entirety on my live journal account, the details of which will be on my bio page. If you are unsure of what content will be there please be assured all you will find is a properly executed sex scene where two adults engage in consensual sex within a committed relationship, without it being shrouded in euphemism and weak symbolism. I'm still bemused as to what is offensive about this, you really couldn't get more vanilla if you tried, but it has been pointed out to me that fics with explicit adult themes are being deleted from the site so I have made changes to avoid this.**

**Chapter Twenty**

**The Consultant**

The jet was quiet, the cabin lights dimmed, most of the passengers dozing lightly. There had been a quick resolution to the case in Montana. Angela Miller hadn't been saved but Francis Goering's partner had been identified and stopped and his latest victim released, relatively unharmed. The team had packed up their incident room, cleared out of the motel they were camped in and embarked on a long and virtually silent flight back to Virginia.

Morgan leaned back in his seat and pulled off his headphones. Letting his eyes wander over his colleagues he groaned inwardly. Hotch sat toward the front of the jet, paper work spread out in front of him, a scowl etched on his face. Rossi was in the seat that faced Hotch's but Morgan knew that he had purposefully taken the seat so that he could swivel it away from his friend as a screw you gesture.

Prentiss had chosen to stretch out on the couch, putting Reid in a bad mood as he generally took the longer seat on homeward flights in order to stretch his legs out and rest comfortably. It hadn't taken Morgan more than a second of time or a fraction of profiling skill to hear her unvoiced _"So, you wanna be treated like everyone else on the team, go scrunch yourself up in a small, uncomfortable seat Dr Reid."_

JJ had taken herself off into one of the window seats and had her i-pod on and her eye mask out before anyone else had even sat down, either to avoid Reid's sulky expression or everyone else's foul mood.

This new, and unhappy, dynamic had left Morgan sat opposite Reid. He watched as Reid read at a furious pace, having started on one book only to discard it twenty minutes later for another, his long fingers whipping each page back with a snap, a small furrow of concentration creasing his forehead. The more he read the harder he frowned.

Morgan tapped his fingers against his iPod and stared at his friend. He hid a smile as he noted Reid's brow furrowing and his Adams apple bobbing as he swallowed convulsively under the pressure of being watched. Finally he snapped his current book closed and stared Morgan in the eye, his brows raised in silent question.

Morgan finally smiled as he crossed his arms over his chest and made himself comfortable. 'So, you wanna talk about what happened?' Morgan asked.

'What did happen Morgan?' Reid said.

Morgan shook his head and sighed. 'You know what I mean, the reason we've got about five elephants in the room at the moment.' Morgan leaned forward and laced his fingers together. 'Come on man, it's me you're talking to, why did you go out with Rossi?'

Reid snapped his book closed and tossed it onto the small table between them. 'He wanted me to and I _am_ an adult Morgan, I can be of use outside of my box you know.'

Morgan studied Reid for a moment before nodding and putting his headphones back on.

* * *

Garcia didn't always wait around in the office for the team to return. It depended on various factors, like if the case was particularly bad or if one of her Knights of the Round Table had been injured or had a close call or if Kevin was working late with counter terrorism again and she didn't want to go home alone.

Tonight, as well as waiting for Kevin to finish with Agent Frost, who according to Kevin was in a foul mood, she had received a call from Morgan requesting her social skills in setting up a night out. His tone had been light enough but she could still pick up a little underlying note that suggested to her that all was not well. Also she was desperate to find out from anyone who would spill just how postal Hotch had gone on Reid and Rossi's collective asses.

She saw Morgan first. He shoved his way through the glass doors and grinned at her. 'Mama, you are a sight for sore eyes.' He said.

'As I should be my love. How are the troops?' She asked.

Morgan snorted and gestured toward the door. 'See for yourself.'

Hotch and Rossi both powered through the doors, straight to their offices, disappearing with a twin slam of their doors. Reid appeared next, making his way to his desk where he pulled a few files from his messenger bag and turned to leave again.

'Hey kitten, how was Montana?' She asked as he passed.

'Ultimately uneventful.' He said. 'Goodnight.'

'You don't want to go for drinks?' She called after him.

'No, thank you.' Reid replied as he reached the door. He paused and turned back to Garcia. 'Thanks though.' He gave her a small smile and shouldered the door open just as JJ and Emily appeared at the other side. Neither Reid nor Emily spoke as they passed.

'You see why we need the drinks?' Morgan asked Garcia as he draped his arm around her shoulder.

'Oh, I see, do I ever see!' Garcia replied. 'You wanna go get a pre drinks drink so we can plan?' She said. 'Kevin should be done soon.'

'Not tonight baby girl. I need to go home and see to Clooney and then I gotta go scrape a friend up off the floor.' He kissed her forehead and headed out. 'You might want to do something with those two though?' He nodded toward JJ and Emily.

* * *

Mike pulled his jacket around his shoulders. He had the heat turned up in the car but he still felt the cold keenly. How anyone could be born in the desert and move out here he didn't know. Sure, Vegas could get cold at night but not the pervasive, bone chilling cold of DC. He had come to the conclusion that he hated it. He couldn't wait to get back home. The contract job was ending in the next couple of days so all he needed to do was finish up this thing with Spencer and he could leave.

Reluctantly he flicked the heat off. The warmth of the car was making him drowsy and he couldn't afford to miss seeing Spencer leave the offices. He knew it was a long shot when he didn't even know what make of car he drove but he had to try. Yesterday had been a bust but today might be better. A half hour later he was about to give up and leave but just as he shoved the stick shift into first he saw a Volvo crawl slowly out of the gates. The window was wound down and Spencer Reid leaned out of the vehicle slightly to speak to the security guard. Mike grinned widely. 'Bingo.' He said to himself as he set off to follow Spencer home.

* * *

Reid ignored the urge to drop into his recliner as soon as he arrived at his apartment, instead he forced himself down the hallway and into his study where he leaned his canes against his desk and lowered himself carefully into his wheelchair.

With practiced ease he pushed himself out of the room with one hand while the other loosened his tie. Dropping the tie in his lap he pushed himself into his bedroom where he shrugged off his sweater vest and unbuttoned his shirt. He toed his shoes off, letting them fall to the floor with a thud as he unbuttoned his pants. Carefully he raised his hips and pushed his pants down past his butt and thighs until they slid down to his ankles. He leaned forward, ignoring the twinge in his back and pulled his pants free along with his socks. After stowing his laundry he wheeled quickly into the bathroom and pushed the door closed behind him.

The sight of the shower and the warmth of the room made him relax instantly. Carefully he reached behind his back and began to pull at the strapping of his brace. When all four of the straps were undone he pulled the thick support off. His jumped slightly when his fingertips brushed the scar at the base of his spine and in an instant he was transported back to the hotel room in Philadelphia with Emily on his bed, gently removing his brace and caressing the damaged skin. Running his finger tips over the surgical site he felt the muscles tighten in his throat and his breath catch.

Flinging the brace to the floor he pushed Emily to the back of his mind, lifted his hips and pushed down his boxers before transferring himself from his wheelchair to the shower.

* * *

Emily loved Garcia's apartment. The first time she had been there she felt like a little girl transported to a fairy grotto and wanted to touch everything. It was so full of colour and personality that being inside it felt like having giant Garcia hugs. It was just what she needed. If she hadn't agreed to come for supper then she would have been home alone with a glass of scotch and picking apart everything that had happened with Spencer. Instead she was with Garcia and JJ, listening to Kevin clattering kitchenware as he cooked and she picked apart everything that had happened with Spencer.

Pulling her feet beneath her she curled into the corner of the couch and happily accepted the large glass of wine Garcia held out for her. JJ sat opposite, clutching her glass as she stared at it.

'Well, you both look like your puppies have been kicked so I presume it was a bad case?' Garcia asked.

'What? Oh, no, well yes it was horrible but we've had worse, I think.' JJ said absently.

'Hmm. And you Miss Emily? What's the reason for your less than sunny mood and does it tie in with why Derek thinks we all need a team building drinkathon?'

'No, we need that because Rossi's an ass and Reid's an idiot.' Emily snapped.

'And I implied that he was helpless and hurt his feelings.' JJ said.

'And now I'm not talking to Reid.' Emily said.

'And Reid's not talking to you.' Garcia finished. 'Don't look at me like that Emily. I may not be a profiler but I have eyes and the way he blew past you tonight was not the action of a man in the throes of happiness. So, what happened?'

Emily took a large drink and scowled at Garcia. Garcia raised her eyebrows expectantly.

'Alright, alright, I messed up, ok! Happy now?' Emily snapped.

Garcia sat on the couch next to her and took her hand. 'What happened?' She repeated.

Suddenly Emily's glass wobbled in her hand and her shoulders fell. Garcia took the glass from her and passed her a box of tissues as tears started to fall fast. 'Everything was going so well and ... we slept together and it was amazing and we did it again and then it happened a few times more and it's not just that, he's so ... Unlike any other guy I've dated and he confided in me and it was so hard for him and...he thinks I betrayed his trust but I didn't! I just wanted to fix things and... and ...' Emily was sobbing now, her words hard to understand. 'And he went and did that stupid thing and I felt so angry and I didn't let him use the couch on the jet and that was just mean and I'm never mean but he could have been hurt and I couldn't say anything because he was already mad at me and now I'm mad at him and he's even madder at me and I don't want to go home to an empty apartment again and that's all his fault, goddamn Spencer Reid making me, making me...not want to go home!'

'You fell in love with him!' Garcia yelped excitedly.

'No! No, I...I...oh god, _I fell in love with him_.' Emily wailed. 'And he hates me and I hate him and it's too broken to fix!'

'Agent Prentiss I had no idea you were so good at drama, look, sweetie, this is not broken, it's not even dented, believe me I know all the seemingly unfixable stages of broken.'

'I definitely think it could be worse.' JJ said as she continued to stare at her glass.

'JJ's right, it could be worse. When Kevin and I met...' Garcia was silenced by a loud clatter from the kitchen and Kevin emerging wearing a kiss the goddess apron. He pointed at her with a spatula.

'No. You are forbidden from telling the story Penelope.' He said firmly.

Garcia stood up and took Kevin's face lovingly in her hands. 'My friend is in pain. She needs to hear the story Kevin. I am telling the story.'

Kevin stared at her, his jaw working, his mouth a hard line. 'Fine! But I want it noted that I am not happy, and I am standing right here to make sure you tell it right!' He gestured to the floor with his spatula.

'I always tell it right and _you_ need to go cook and if you treasure all that is kinky in our relationship you will go now.' Garcia pointed toward the kitchen.

* * *

Reid pulled his door open to find Morgan standing on the other side, his arms full of takeout food bags.

'Morgan? What are you doing here?' Reid asked.

'Thought I'd come scrape you off the floor and bring food at the same time.'

'I'm not on the floor.' Reid said.

'Metaphorically. Morgan said as he pushed into the apartment. 'How's the shower seat holding up?'

'It's fine; it's...why are you here?' Reid asked again.

'Friendship stuff, which you're clearly still not understanding the dynamics of, so just go with me. Where are your dishes?' He called from the kitchen. 'Never mind, I got them.'

Morgan came back into the room and dumped dishes and forks onto the dining table along with several cartons of Chinese food. 'Come on, I'm starving.'

They ate silently for a while until the initial burst of hunger was sated and Morgan pushed his plate away, only to start picking at the left over egg rolls.

'So, I hear you had a little trouble at the recruitment seminar.' Morgan said.

Reid shoved his own dish away. 'I _told_ Emily not to...' Reid started.

'Whoa, who said anything about Emily? It was Rossi who I spoke to about it.' Morgan said.

'Rossi?' Reid said.

'Rossi. He also told me that he saw the same guy near the FBI building before we left for Montana, so tell me, is this guy a threat?' Morgan said.

'He was at the BAU? I...no...I.' Reid ran his hand through his hair and sighed. 'I just don't want to talk about this; if I have an issue with him I will resolve it.'

'I take it Emily has already tried to discuss this?' Morgan said. Reid looked uncomfortable but didn't answer. 'And you chewed her out and then proved you could take care of yourself by going into the field with Rossi.' Morgan finished.

'What! No, that is not why...it's not why...I... I don't know what got into me. I just...earlier with Emily, well she made me feel helpless and then JJ made some comment about Rossi looking out for me and, well, it was emasculating Morgan, I mean how would you have felt!' Reid stared at Morgan earnestly. 'I really messed up with Hotch didn't I?' Reid finally said.

'On anyone else's scale you'd be about a seven, on Hotch's scale, about a hundred, although I think he's more pissed at Rossi than you.' Morgan laughed.

'Hotch was right and I knew it, I know what my contract says, what I'm insured for, but I still tried to argue. If Strauss finds out I could lose my job and my ...friends, what was I thinking Morgan!' Reid said, his expression pained.

'So apologise. It won't erase what you and Rossi did and you'll have to work to get Hotch's trust back, but he's a fair man, you know that, and he won't take this to Strauss.' Morgan said.

Reid groaned and let his head fall into his hands.

'Don't worry too much about Hotch kid, he's gonna be the easy part.' Morgan laughed.

'What do you mean?' Reid asked.

'Emily and how you left things with her. In my experience sorting things out with women is never easy.' Morgan said.

Reid ran his hand through his hair and frowned. 'I don't think I can't trust her.' Reid said flatly. 'And if I can't trust her then surely we have nowhere to go.'

'Whoa, you're really determined not to let this work aren't you?' Morgan said.

'What? No!' Reid said.

'Well it sure looks that way from where I'm sitting. First you have this dumb four date rule and then you spend weeks telling yourself that Emily couldn't possibly be in this for the long haul, convincing yourself that one morning she will wake up and not see the man she loves but some cripple who's not worth her time and now you have your first disagreement and it's all over. Well, I hope you have plenty of books to keep you warm in your old age Dr Reid because I think it might be a little cold and lonely where you're headed.'

Reid stared at Morgan, his jaw dropping slightly.

'Kid, I don't know exactly what she did, or what confidences you think she broke, but could you just consider for a moment why she might have done it? Could it be that she's in love with you and she wants to protect you?' Morgan said.

'I'm a man I shouldn't need to be protected!' Reid said weakly.

'When it's right, when it's a true partnership with real strength, love can be a great equaliser Reid.' Morgan said.

* * *

Garcia sat next to Emily and handed her another tissue. 'Kevin and I met years before we worked at the bureau.'

'I thought you met on a case?' JJ said.

'No interrupting the story honey. Going in to my second year at Caltech, my parents died. I thought I was fine, I went to lectures, handed in papers, made the right noises at all the right counselling sessions and painted a smile on my face so bright it would have made my current colour pallet look like the first few frames of The Wizard of Oz.' Garcia paused and grabbed Emily's glass, draining the wine inside. 'Anyhow, reality caught up with me, the way it always does right, and I guess I went a little haywire.

I started going to this little hole in the wall place that all the darker tech witches and wizards went to and before I knew it I was stashed up in my room ninety percent of the time, cutting classes and missing papers. If I did go out it was to hang with this new crowd and talk about the only thing that made me, made any of us, feel alive; _hacking_.'

Emily and JJ glanced at each other.

'I know what you're thinking, lame, right, but for me, after my parents, I felt like I was walking around inside this bubble, that no one could understand what I felt and it was such hard work to make nice and just _talk_ to people with all their focus on minutia when my parents were dead, my mother and father were _dead_!' Garcia poured another drink.

'Hacking was easy. Spending all day and night with my babies was easy, no talking, just typing and you could be whoever you wanted, not plain Penny with the dead parents but someone, anyone else. Anyway, I did become someone else.' Garcia said quietly. 'After only a couple of months I was well known in the group. I could hack anything and I did. I felt so _alive_and so _addicted_ to it.'

'Addictions never end well PG.' Emily said.

'Yeah, yeah.' Garcia waved the comment away. 'Anyway, only one thing stood in the way of the path to total happiness for the beautiful and talented Penelope and that was _Mort_.'

'Mort?' JJ said.

'Mort. Another hacker; Mort was his online name. This guy was simply stunning. The routes he used were _elegant_. Everyone talked about him. No one knew who he was and no one could get near him but I chased him and chased him and chased him. Every path he started on I would follow, every back door he left cracked I jumped through, and it must have got out about my obsession because one day he hacked me and left me an invite to follow him. I did and after that we were like a tag team. He'd dare me and I'd dare him.'

'It wasn't just the hacks, I mean, we'd talk and talk and it was so much better than talking in real life, so much easier. I fell in virtual love.' Garcia took a deep breath and smiled at her friends. JJ had tears in her eyes.

'Jayje, honey are you alright?' Emily asked.

JJ nodded and swiped at her eyes. 'It's a very emotional story.' She said as Garcia and Emily frowned at her. 'Please carry on.' She sniffled.

'Well, the things Mort hacked were getting bigger and riskier, _stupidly riskier_,' Garcia raised her voice toward the kitchen, jumping slightly when a loud clatter of pans sounded through the door, 'but it seems that I'm just a girl who can't say no so, when he invited me to hack several FBI databases for thanksgiving, I agreed. It took days. I don't think I slept or ate apart from Gatorade and Reese's. After three days and a few minor firewalls knocked down I knew we were stuck. We'd hit a wall and were going nowhere and the only thing open was this window and everything in my gut told me to keep away from it, I mean a window right where you need one is always too good to be true but Mort, he wanted to use it and when I said no he goaded me with some dumb line like _follow me down the rabbit hole if you've got the stones for it,_and I was all stupid and youthful and I did. They arrested me an hour later and I found myself in the FBI wearing Yummy Sushi pyjamas and pink marabou feather slippers.'

'Weren't you scared?' Emily asked.

'Terrified. They took me to an interrogation room and started hounding me with questions about Mort and how we met and what his real name was and if I knew how many other government areas he'd breached but I couldn't tell them anything so they started listing all the other places _I'd_ hacked and telling me how much trouble I was in. After a couple of hours alone they said they were taking me to a holding cell and lead me out and that's when I saw him, this dumb but gorgeous college kid on his knees in the hallway ...'

Kevin suddenly burst in through the kitchen door. 'I was not dumb! _You_ followed me and I have never used the word _stones_ to describe that part of the male anatomy, ever. I would have said cohunes and you know it. _You_ wanted to go through that window not me!'

'You have such a selective memory!' Garcia gasped.

'Wait, wait, what happened, why were you on your knees?' Emily asked Kevin.

'I was trying to stage a sit in but the agent with me realised that grabbing my considerably longer hair and pulling was an effective anti measure.' Kevin said.

'And then?' Emily pushed.

'Then he screws up again and we spend the next two years being kept at opposite ends of the FBI.' Garcia said.

Kevin shook his head and turned to Emily and JJ. 'I screwed up, yeah, right, 'cause I was dumb enough to tell her I loved her and what happens, I get punched in the face by the agent and she throws her slippers at me and they might look all soft and feathery but they're really not!'

'You told her you loved her!' JJ exclaimed.

'Shouted it down the hallway. The minute I saw her being led out of that room I knew it was her and I knew I was in love with her. She was mind blowing and, well, just look at her, she's exquisite.' Kevin said shyly.

Garcia's expression melted and she turned to Kevin, cupping his face in her hands and kissing him deeply. Breaking away Kevin smiled at her. 'I love you Tank Girl Massacre.'

'And I love you, Mort.' Garcia replied.

Emily stared at her friends for a moment. 'Now I guess that _was_ pretty broken.' She said.

'Exactly, but it got fixed Emily. Now I suggest we eat Kevin's bad Italian food and then go find a bar.' Garcia said as she squeezed Kevin's hand.

* * *

Morgan was in Reid's kitchen fixing coffee when he felt his cell vibrate in his pocket. 'Morgan.'

'Hey handsome, I've talked the ladies into going to Julio's with me and Kevin. You up for it?'

'Sure thing mama.' Morgan smiled. 'And I'm with Reid. I'll drag him along too.'

'Oh, good luck with the convincing. He didn't look in any mood to socialise earlier.' Garcia said.

'Don't worry about that baby girl, I can be pretty persuasive.' Morgan laughed.

'I hope so, I think Emily needs to kiss and make up with our junior genius.' Garcia.

* * *

Mike gasped as a vicious kink flared in his neck when he sat forward in his seat. Ignoring the pain he watched the door to the apartment building open and Spencer Reid walk slowly out. He was with the big guy who'd turned up an hour or so earlier and he didn't look happy. The other guy sprinted down the sidewalk leaving Spencer standing awkwardly on the sidewalk.

Mike unbuckled his seatbelt and was about to crack the door open when a black SUV pulled up obscuring Spencer from his view. The big guy was driving and Mike watched him lean across the interior of the vehicle and push the passenger door open.

As the SUV moved off Mike slipped his car into drive and followed.

* * *

Reid rotated the beer bottle in his hands and stared at the table top. He hadn't wanted to come to the bar but Morgan had forced him and now he was off dancing with Garcia and Kevin leaving Reid sitting listening to JJ and Emily as they played darts over by the wall. They had paired up with a couple of guys for a game and as hard as Reid tried not to watch Emily he couldn't help himself.

He was stealing a quick glance when JJ threw her last arrow and scored a bull's eye. A brief cheer marked the end of the game and saw Emily and JJ turn back to the table. Reid quickly lowered his eyes and resumed his staring at the bottle in his hand.

'Where's Morgan?' JJ asked.

Reid nodded toward the dance area.

'He left you sitting alone?' Emily said.

'Well maybe he recognises that I'm an adult so I guess he thought it was ok.' Reid said.

Emily sighed and grabbed her drink.

The table was silent as both Reid and Emily drank and avoided looking at each other, both snatching glances in the others direction.

'Seriously!' JJ said after suffering the silence for too long. 'You're both going to sit and sulk with each other for what, some dumb disagreement?' Reid and Emily both stopped drinking and looked at JJ.

'Don't just sit and stare at me, speak to each other or are you both stupid! You're both here, together, in the same state and whatever problem you have is resolvable, _your_ problem is resolvable, so grow up and resolve it! JJ snapped before standing up abruptly and shoving away from the table.

As they watched JJ push her way toward the restroom Emily and Reid sat in silence until Reid set his bottle down and looked up.

'I'm angry with you and yet all I've felt all day is sadness at the thought of not speaking to you and I don't understand what it means to be angry and yet still want the person you're angry with. It doesn't make any sense.' Reid said.

Emily looked across at him, her face tight with emotion. 'It means that you care about me, about us.' She said. 'I know because I feel the same way.' Emily tentatively slid her hand across the table but stopped when Reid failed to reach for her. The silence stretched.

'Can we go home together?' He asked suddenly.

Emily was about to answer when Morgan appeared.

'Guys, we're gonna head out. JJ's not feeling well so Garcia and Kevin are gonna take her home.' Morgan said as he came back to the table with Garcia, Kevin and JJ in tow.

'So are we.' Emily said as she stood, shoved her purse over her shoulder and grabbed Reid's canes.

'You want a ride back to your apartment Reid?' Morgan asked.

'Thanks Morgan, could we go back to Emily's?' Reid looked at Emily. She nodded and handed him his canes.

'Sure thing kid.' Morgan grinned at his friend and led the way from the bar.

* * *

They had reached the parking lot and were heading toward the two cars when a figure approached them from the shadows.

'Spencer, Spencer Reid?' Mike called as he approached the group.

Reid paused momentarily and the continued even as Emily placed her hand on his arm.

'Spencer, please, I...' Mike caught up with him and stepped in front of him. 'You don't remember me but...' Mike faltered as Reid ignored him and kept walking.

'Kid?' Morgan said as Reid moved on. 'What's...Hey!' Morgan moved suddenly as Mike put his hand in Reid's shoulder. 'Get your hands offa' him before I make you.' Morgan said as both he and Emily moved forward.

'Please, you don't understand, I'm not here to cause trouble I just, I known him and he doesn't remember me and I just need to...'

Reid stopped. 'Don't remember you! You think because I didn't want to talk the other day that I didn't remember you? It never occurred to you that I didn't want to acknowledge you, to even think about you ever again?' Reid said, silencing everyone else.

Mike swallowed hard. 'I...I knew it wasn't likely that you'd forgotten, you don't forget anything do you, I remember that.'

'Yeah, nervous wreck Reid never forgets anything.' Reid said.

'He said doesn't want to talk to you so why don't you leave him alone.' Emily interrupted.

'She's right man. I don't know who you are but it's clear that Reid isn't interested in a catch up so get out of here before I get my badge out and you wind up under arrest for harassment.' Morgan said.

'Please.. .' Mike started.

'Back off.' Emily snapped.

'I have to...'Mike tried to speak again.

'Do as she said man.' Morgan interrupted.

'Shut up! All of you just shut up.' Reid yelled. When the group was silent he turned back to Mike. 'If I listen will you leave.' He said, his breath threatening to close his throat.

'I swear to god I will never approach you again.' Mike said.

Reid looked down at the ground and gripped the tops of his canes and then looked back at Mike.

'I need help.' Mike said. 'I know I have no right to ask it of you, _especially_ of you, but I'm desperate. Harper, she ... all she thinks about is you, about what we did to you and it's killing her, it's... well, you got all the invitations so you can see how much she organises and... they're all for you, all the reunions, cookouts, alumni fundraisers, she's waiting for you to come even though I keep telling her it won't happen. I thought she was getting better but we found out she'd been keeping track of you, sending invites to you in DC when she found out your mom's house had been sold. I didn't know, I swear I didn't know. If I had I'd have told her to stop, got her some help but now ...She thinks she's cursed because of what we did. She thinks it's why she can't get pregnant.' Mike stopped and shook his head. 'I know I have no right,' He fumbled in his pocket, pulled out a crumpled card and held it out. 'I thought if I hand delivered this one you might consider it.'

Reid stared at the invite.

'I can't take it from your hand because I can't stand without both of my canes, just like I can't take the FBI training to do the job these guys do because I'm classed as disabled, just like if I ever have children I'll never play ball with them because I can't hold the damn thing and myself up at the same time.' Reid took a shaky breath and held Mikes gaze. 'I do have some super amazing skills though, courtesy of Harper and the team. Let me think, I can undress myself while sitting in a wheelchair, I can measure out the exact dosage of Morphine I need to take the edge off but not leave me like a zombie, and for those really bad times, when I know I won't be able to get out of bed for days, I can catheterise myself in under a minute, which sounds horrible but believe me it's better than having a standing reservation at a rehabilitation centre.' Reid said, his face flushed.

Mike shook his head slightly and screwed his eyes shut. 'I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry.' He said.

'I can't help you.' Reid said as he turned to move away.

'Three months.' Mike said. 'Please, it's in three months just think about it. Just...I know you're the better person here Spencer, I know that.' Mike scrubbed at his eyes with his coat sleeve as he watched Spencer walk away.

Morgan grabbed the reunion invite as he walked past Mike. 'I don't want to see you anywhere near him again, not where he works or where he lives, do you understand me?' Morgan said.

Mike grabbed Morgan's arm. 'I never meant to hurt him, you have to know that, we were just kids.' He said.

'I don't know what happened man, but with all I've seen, I know exactly what kids can do.' Morgan said as he walked away.

* * *

Emily locked the door of her apartment and set the keys on the hall table. Spencer was in the lounge, lights off, looking out of the huge picture window, his shoulders hunched as he leaned heavily on his canes.

'Are you alright?' Emily asked.

'Why did you start to tell Mike to leave?' He said.

'Why...he seemed threatening, I just wanted to diffuse the situation.' She said.

'And if it had been Morgan?' He asked.

'What?' She said.

If it had been Morgan who he had approached, would you have stepped in then? Or is it just me that needs protecting?' Spencer said as he turned to look at her.

Emily sighed and ran her hands through her hair. 'It's what people do Spencer; they protect the ones they're close to! It's not about your physical abilities.'

'You don't see me as a man.' He said quietly.

'I do!'

'You don't. You don't see me the way you see Morgan or Hotch or even Rossi, you don't.'

Emily stepped forward and cupped his cheek. 'The only reason I look at you any differently is because I care for you in ways that I don't care about Morgan or Hotch or Rossi!'

'I want you to say it.' Reid said, ignoring her words.

'Say what?' Emily sounded confused.

'Say that you see me as a man. Say it.' Spencer said as he leaned one of his canes against the dining table and grabbed her wrist for support. 'Say it.' He repeated as he sank into the nearest dining chair, pulling her toward him.

Emily leaned over him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. 'Spencer, you know I...'

'Say it Emily. I want you to say it and know that you mean it.' His voice was hard and the grip on her wrist tightened as he pulled her to him and kissed her, his tongue pressing into her mouth, filling her with heat.

He pulled back and stared up at her his eyes dark, his expression calculating. He pushed his hands beneath her shirt, his palms flat on her stomach. Deftly he turned her around so that she was facing the window and the glittering lights of the Capitol.

'Say it.' He said as he pushed her shirt up, his fingers pulling until the buttons started to pop.

Emily tried to turn back to him but he held her firmly and pressed a kiss to the valley of her spine which turned into a trail of fireworks as he licked a slow stripe up her back, terminating between her shoulder blades. Keeping one hand firmly on her stomach he used the other to tug her shirt away.

Once her shirt was free he dropped it on to the floor and pushed his hand into the back of her hair, guiding her head forward as he pressed hot, wet kisses onto her back. His hand left her hair and swept down her body, his arm curling around her waist as he reached for the button of her pants. He snapped it open and slid his hand into her underwear leaving Emily gasping as he pushed her pants down.

His breath was hot on her back as he spoke. 'I want you to think it, and say it and mean it.' He said as he drew her into his lap.

He pulled her body flush with his and she could feel the strength in his hand where it splayed on her stomach, pulling her to him. She felt his other hand on her back as he pushed her forwards and then worked to unzip his pants.

The hand on her stomach slipped lower and Emily groaned. She tried to push her body into his hand to gain some friction and some semblance of control but his left hand moved to her hip and held her still.

'Wait.' He whispered against the skin of her back.

He held both her hips and lifted her up a little. The sudden movement up onto her toes made her balance falter and she reached back and grabbed his forearms. Almost as soon as he had lifted her up he was pulling her back down onto him.

Emily gasped, her whole body curving forward, her hair falling in her face. He kissed her neck, his teeth grazing her skin sharply making her head snap up and her eyes fly open. She saw herself then, in the darkness of the window. It was the most erotic sight she had ever seen, herself, in her underwear, sitting in her lover's lap, his hands on her hips, his head buried into her neck, his hair falling over her shoulder, her eyes wide, mouth a perfect, soundless 'O'.

The sight finally made her come undone. She gasped and grabbed Spencer's hand, lacing her fingers with his tightly.

'Do you see it, do you see it now?' Spencer gasped against her as he tumbled over the edge. 'Can you _say_ it now Emily?'

Emily opened her eyes as they both stilled and saw her reflection again, her hand clasped over his, her thighs trembling, her chest heaving, sweat glistening along her stomach. She had never felt so controlled, so wanted or owned before and the feeling left her speechless.

**CMCM**


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

Some dialog taken from S3; E014. Where this dialog appears it will be bracketed by *asterisks*. Dialog denoted by asterisks is not written by me but by the CM writers.

**Chapter Twenty One**

**The Consultant**

When Emily awoke she couldn't be sure what had disturbed her but she knew she hadn't been asleep for long. The red glow of her alarm clock showed close to one am and the apartment was silent except for Spencer's deep, rhythmic breathing.

Leaning up on one arm she looked at him. He was laid on his back, as usual, one arm thrown wide, the other bent across his bare stomach. He looked more relaxed in sleep than she had ever seen him before. Laying her palm flat on his chest she counted his heart beats beneath her hand and smiled. The warmth of his skin contrasted with the coolness of the air around them and she shivered. Wriggling a little she pulled the sheet higher to cover her chest and suppressed a groan as she felt a dull ache in her thigh muscles and a slight burn between her legs.

She blushed as the memory of what they had been doing only a couple of hours earlier came flooding back to her and she couldn't help the sudden swell of arousal that she felt as she remembered how she had looked reflected darkly in the window as Spencer guided her to ride him. She also remembered how commanding he had been and at that moment she instinctively leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his slightly parted lips.

She half hoped that he would wake but instead he barely roused his nose wrinkling slightly as her hair tickled his face. Kissing him again she ran her hand gently through his hair and down the side of his face. She traced his jaw, his neck and finally let her fingers come to rest on his shoulder. She hadn't thought about it before but as she tracked the contours of his muscles she realised how defined his upper body was, that this was where his strength lay, where he found the ability to manipulate her body on to his, to hold her exactly where he wanted to.

Moving to cup his face again she leaned in for a third kiss as the knowledge that she truly was in love with him threatened to overwhelm her. Brushing his lips she felt his warm breath ghost across her face.

'I know I didn't say it, but Spencer Reid you are the _best_ _man_ I have ever known, the only man I've ever known whose made me to feel like this, whose made me fall... fall in love.' She whispered as she threaded her hand through his hair and nuzzled her face into his neck her sudden tears snaking wet rivulets onto his skin.

* * *

Hotch stared at his ceiling. It was better than staring at his clock which was in turn better than staring at his answer machine as it blinked furiously at him in the darkness of his bedroom.

Haley had left dozens of messages on his land line and his cell, each one angrier than the previous. He'd listened to a half dozen and then switched off, briefly wondering what Jack was doing while his mother spewed vitriol down the line.

He hadn't seen his son in over a week and that, along with Dave's stupid stunt with Reid, wasn't helping his overwhelming feeling of tension. He turned over and beat his pillow into submission for the third time since he'd retired. He'd had cases that had lasted longer than a week before that had taken him away from his son for longer than a week before, so why was this period of separation worse? He'd asked himself this question over and over during the course of the evening and had grown to hate the little voice that kept responding to his question with a terrifying answer of "_because this separation might be permanent_".

Rolling once more onto his back Hotch screwed his eyes shut and tried not to wonder if Haley's new lover had been the one to tuck Jack in tonight. Angrily swiping a stray tear from his face he worked to steady his breathing and focus on the repetitive swish of the cars in the street below. Counting each one as it passed his apartment block he willed the tug of sleep to take him away. He had nearly got his wish when his cell phone rang.

His teeth clenched automatically. It was almost one am; would Haley really be calling him now? He snatched at the cell phone and flicked it open.

'Hotchner.' He said.

'Agent Hotchner?' A man's voice sounded at the other end.

'Who is this?' Hotch replied.

'Look I'm really sorry about calling at this time of night; it's Paul Cafferrey from the Federal Prisons Board. Chester Hardwick's demanding that he see someone at 8am tomorrow morning. Any later and he refuses to talk. I think he's just trying to go out with a bang, you know, make some noise to remind people he's still here even if it isn't for much longer. I'd like to tell him to no deal but Montez said I should run it by your department first.' Cafferrey said tiredly.

Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

'Don't give him an answer tonight but a colleague and I will be there before 8am.' Hotch said shortly.

'You sure? I mean do we really want this scumbag calling the shots? I can't see why we would need to know what he thinks about late at night.' Cafferrey said.

'And if you had a daughter who had been missing for the past fifteen years and was last seen in the area Hardwick operated in, would you feel the same then Mr Cafferrey? Or would you want to know what had happened to her?' Hotch said. 'Tomorrow, 8am. We'll be there.'

* * *

Spencer felt something warm tickle the skin of his neck and almost immediately he recognised the sensation as warm _and_ wet. Blinking away the blanket of sleep he recognised the sound of Emily's breathing as she tried to bring it under control. Looking down he was confronted with the top of her head, her face still being buried in his neck.

'Emily? What's wrong?' He asked quietly as he shrugged her away from his body in an attempt to see her face.

She pulled back and hid behind a swathe of black hair. 'Nothing, go back to sleep.' She said.

'It's not nothing, you're crying, what's wrong?' He asked.

Moving back she wiped her face dry and smiled. 'I'm not really crying I'm good, honestly.'

'I can't see how this is good; I sleep with a woman and the next thing I know she's crying.' He smiled tentatively. 'Is that it, did I hurt you? I was too rough wasn't I, Emily I am so...'

'Shush.' Emily pressed a hand to his mouth. 'You weren't _too_ anything and I am most definitely not crying because I just had the most amazing sex of my life. I might be a little grief stricken that I've missed having said amazing sex all these years, but not because I just had it.' She joked weakly.

Spencer grasped her hand and kissed her fingers. 'But you _were_ crying.' He said.

Emily looked away. She found that she couldn't look into his eyes and speak. 'Will you leave it alone if I say they were tears of happiness?'

'No.' He replied.

'I just... I realised that...' Emily rolled her eyes and rolled onto her back.

'What is it?' Spencer asked.

'I'm just not good at this.' Emily waved her hand between the two of them. 'I'm not good at saying these things; I've never had to or wanted to say them before.'

'What things?' Spencer said.

'You know.' Emily said.

'No, I don't.' He countered.

Emily sighed and stared at the ceiling. After a moment she took a deep breath. 'You're the best _man_ I know Spencer Reid.

Spencer carefully turned his body and gazed at her. 'You really didn't have to say it.' He said gently.

'Hold on there's something else, and I might be going out on a limb here and I'm scared to say it but...'

She was interrupted by the shrill ring of a cell phone.

'Dammit.' Emily cursed. 'That's yours.'

'Sorry, I'm sorry I should get it. It could be a case or my mom...I.. .' Spencer reached carefully for his cell phone on the nightstand.

'If it's a case mine will be ringing in the next three minutes anyway.' She groaned as she sat up and grabbed at her discarded sweats as Spencer answered the call. Hauling herself out of the warm bed she padded into the bathroom. Staring in the mirror she willed her heart beat to slow to a manageable pace as she thought about what she wanted to say to Spencer.

'_Just tell him that you're in love with him, stop worrying and stop thinking there will always be a better time, just say it Emily Elizabeth Prentiss, just say it._' She told herself.

Leaning over the basin she wet her hands and scrubbed them over her face before heading back to the bedroom.

Spencer was sitting on the side of the bed trying to secure his back brace when she returned. Silently she climbed onto the bed and knelt behind him, her hands finding the straps and gently brushing his away.

'Tell me when it's tight enough.' She said as she pulled the strapping and he straightened his spine.

'A little more.' He said.

'Does your back hurt?' She asked.

'Why?' He replied.

'You pull this tighter when it hurts. I assume to give more support. In case you didn't realise I am a profiler.' She said as she worked on the last of the fastenings.

'Thank you.' He reached back and grabbed her hand. 'It's not a case so you can go back to bed.'

'What was it?' She asked.

'Hotch. Chester Hardwick is demanding that we see him at 8am tomorrow. We have to drive to Connecticut.' He said.

Emily groaned. 'You've had no sleep.'

'I won't be driving.' He said as he started to dress. 'Hotch is picking me up in twenty.'

'You can't go in the morning?' Emily asked.

Spencer shook his head. 'I guess not. It's Hotch's call.'

'Twenty minutes gives me time to make you a flask of coffee.' She said as she jumped off the bed and headed out of the room.

'You don't have to.' He called after her as he continued to dress.

'No I don't but I want to. I'll make one for Hotch too. I have a vested interest in him being awake enough to keep his eyes on the road.' She called back.

She'd only just finished the coffee when Spencer received a curt text telling him that Hotch was outside waiting in the SUV. She quickly shoved both travel flasks into Spencer's messenger bag, looped it over his head and kissed him.

'Call me when you get there,' she said, 'and don't spend too long talking to Hardwick. I want you back tomorrow night.'

'And if I don't make it?' He asked, smiling at the threatening tone of her voice.

'Then I'll kick your skinny ass and Hotch's too.' She joked as she kissed him toward the door.

He was about to leave when he stopped sharply and turned back to look at her. 'No you won't, you wouldn't risk not getting any more of, what did you call it, _the_ most amazing sex of your life!'

Laughing she shook her head as she pulled the door open. 'I never said that.'

'Eidetic memory Emily. Once it's in here you can't get it back.' He said, gesturing to his forehead with one the top of one of his canes while simultaneously flashing the most staggeringly wide and blinding smile as he left.

It was only when she had crept back into bed and was inhaling his scent from his pillow that she remembered. She had forgotten to tell him that she loved him.

* * *

Reid leaned his canes against the interior of the passenger door and tried to get comfortable. His back was screaming in protest at having such a short time to rest and his head was halfway between swimming and pounding at being woken from the first hour of a deep sleep. Silently he drew one of the Hardwick files from his messenger bag as Hotch pulled the SUV into the night.

A brief glance showed Reid that Hotch was staring intently at the road ahead. His hands gripped the steering wheel and his shoulders were tight.

'Did you get any sleep?' Reid asked eventually.

'No.' Hotch replied.

Reid cleared his throat and returned to the file.

Hotch drove onward as Reid flipped through the files.

'Have you spoken with Hardwick before?' Reid asked.

'No.' Hotch replied.

Reid pushed on despite Hotch's monosyllabic answers. 'He was certainly prolific.' He said.

Hotch didn't reply.

'What approach should we take when we get in there?' Reid asked.

'We interview him and then we leave.' Hotch said as he pressed his foot to the accelerator.

Reid closed the file and flattened his palm against the top of it. 'Hotch, about Montana, I'm sorry about what happened.' He said.

Hotch was silent.

'I know I shouldn't have gone out with Rossi. I know why I did it but my having a reason doesn't validate my actions and, well, I'm sorry, for placing you in a difficult position with Strauss and making things awkward between you and Rossi.' Reid cleared his throat nervously and fiddled with the folder on his lap as he watched Hotch flex his fingers around the steering wheel from the corner of his eye.

'Reid, David Rossi has been a friend of mine for a long time and I can categorically vouch that he is a good man and a great profiler but he has never held much stock in rules and regulations.' Hotch said eventually. 'His arrogance could get you fired or worse, injured, maybe killed.' The car was silent for a moment before he continued. 'My anger was fuelled by fear and that fear _was_ rooted in your physical limitations but not in the way you think. You're not field trained Reid and while taking you to look around a trailer park may sound danger free, as an agent you can _never_ underestimate what might happen. Rossi knows that and he should have acted accordingly and you know the terms of your engagement and you should have acted accordingly also.'

'I truly am sorry Hotch especially with Strauss and whatever...' Reid turned to look at Hotch when he cut him off.

'I don't give a damn about Strauss Reid, but I do give a damn about the members of my team; All of them. It's _my_ job to keep them safe especially the ones not trained to protect themselves, and I'll do everything I can to achieve that, even if it means being a drill sergeant sometimes.'

Hotch's cell began to buzz on the centre console, the name _HALEY_ flashed across the screen in the darkness of the SUV's interior. Hotch glanced at the phone his mouth set in a hard line.

'Do you want me to...?' Reid started to reach for the cell.

'No.' Hotch interrupted as he grabbed the phone, switched it off and dumped it back between the seats. 'You should read through the files again. We have a couple more hours before we reach the hotel and then we'll only get a couple of hours sleep before we have to go to the facility. I need you to be prepared. _This_ is what you excel at Reid, don't let Rossi make you feel that you're lacking because you can't do more.'

Reid turned back to the file on his lap and resisted the urge to point out that he didn't have to read a file more than once to be prepared. Instead he kept his mouth shut for the rest of the journey.

* * *

Emily rolled over in her bed and sighed. Since when did she, Emily Prentiss, need someone in her bed to help her sleep? Irritated with herself she flung the sheets back and got up.

"_Apparently since I turned into a sap and fell in love_" She murmured to herself as she padded into the kitchen and set to fixing a pot of coffee.

She stopped suddenly with the carafe in her hand.

"_Since I fell in love_." She repeated a little louder. Rinsing the pot slowly she breathed through the lurch of emotion that swelled her stomach as she realised that she had never said those words in relation to herself before.

A small smile began to tug at her lips as she made the coffee. By the time she has fixed a mug and grabbed her laptop it had grown into a modest smile. By the time she was back in her bed, wrapped in the sheets that smelled of Spencer and watching The Return of the Jedi she was besieged by a huge grin and a rollercoaster in her stomach.

* * *

Emily was definitely going to kick his ass Reid thought as he studied the snow globe he had picked up from Abner Merrimen's desk.

He and Hotch had spent most of the day waiting for Chester Hardwick to decide that he was going to talk. It was clear that he was irritated that he hadn't had an answer the previous night as to if anyone would be speaking to him today and he was trying to claw back some of the power by refusing to speak at his requested time, saying he felt too unwell but that he might be well enough if he slept and so on and so on.

His machinations had kept both he and Hotch waiting around nearly all day. Finally, after Hotch's temperament had soured beyond repair Hardwick had announced that he was ready.

Reid gave the snow globe one last shake and set it back down on the desk. Hotch was pacing and snapping his cell phone closed.

*****'Is everything alright?' Reid asked tentatively.

'Yeah, fine.' Hotch said.

'We can do this interview another time.' Reid offered.

'Well he's scheduled to be executed next week.' Hotch sighed.

'I can take the lead if you'd...' Reid started.

Hotch held up his hand, his expression irritated. 'Reid!' He snapped.

'Sorry.' Reid picked the snow globe back up and turned it in his hands.

The door to the office opened and a slight, bearded man entered.

'Agent Hotchner?' He said. 'And you must be Doctor Reid. Abner Merrimen, Assistant Warden. You're here to see our infamous inmate Hardwick!'

'Yeah, he agreed to meet with us as part of our criminal personality research project prior to his execution.' Reid said.

'I've read some of your studies in policing journals. Serial killers are a kind of hobby of mine. Chester's the only one I've ever met in person though. I bet you've met quite a few!' Abner said enthusiastically.

'Sir we'd very much like to get started as soon as we can.' Hotch said, cutting the older man off.

'Oh of course, of course forgive me. We don't really have any interrogation facilities but I do have a small room that you can use. You're not armed?'

'We secured our weapons when we arrived. It's not our first time in a prison.' Hotch said.

'No, no I suppose that's true.' Abner smiled, oblivious to Hotch's irritation. 'I have to say; when I heard that he'd contacted you I was surprised.'

'Why?' Reid asked.

'Chester Hardwick? He doesn't really talk much, to anyone.' Abner said as he unlocked the door and pushed it open.

'Well that usually changes when someone's about to die.'***** Hotch said as he shouldered his way out of the room.

* * *

'So, you and Reid kiss and make up last night?' Morgan said as he leaned against Emily's desk.

'No.' Emily deadpanned. 'He refused to agree that I was right about Montana so I had no choice but to shoot him. Will you help me with the body?'

Morgan laughed. 'Oh, do you have it bad girl!'

'What? I just told you that I shot Reid.' Emily laughed.

'Yes. Avoidance tactic using a joke to take my eye off all the blushing and the way you just fingered your hair when I mentioned his name.' Morgan said. 'Tell me and I'll give you this glorious cup of take out Macchiato that has your name on it.' He wiggled the cup temptingly in front of her.

'You're correct. We made up and my gun still has all of its bullets, so give me the coffee Agent Morgan.' Emily said.

Morgan smirked and set the cup down. 'The question is does Reid's gun still have all of _his_ bullets?'

'Ew! You are disgusting. Get to your own desk and take some of my files as an apology.'

'No way. I'm gonna be slipping some of my files on to Reid's desk as it is. I am swamped today. Speaking of Reid, where is he?' Morgan gestured to Reid's empty desk and the take out coffee cup he'd put on it.

'He's in Connecticut with Hotch. They drove down last night so they could interview Chester Hardwick.' Emily said.

Morgan pulled a face. 'I do not envy them that. I guess I'll have to find someone else to drink this coffee then.' He said.

Emily looked up. 'Cappuccino with double caramel and a chocolate swirl?' She said.

Morgan nodded.

'Good luck with that.' Emily laughed as she pulled the topmost file on to her desk.

Morgan laughed. 'You have a point. No one else would drink this.' He grabbed the cup and tossed it in to the bin.

'You were right, you know.' Emily said.

'About what?' Morgan asked.

'About not getting all into Reid's business. About not treating him like he's helpless.' Emily said.

Morgan settled back on the edge of Emily's desk. 'So you're not going to tell him to go to this reunion gig then?'

'If he carried I'd tell him to shoot the son of a bitch but no, under my new rule of treating him like a man and allowing him to make his own decisions I'm not gonna press it one way or the other and that goes for anything else that comes up.' Emily said.

'Well that's certainly very gracious of you Emily.' Morgan laughed.

'I thought so.' She replied smiling. 'I do however reserve the right to interfere with his clothes shopping.'

'Yeah, right, you just keep telling yourself you're not hot for all those knitted sweater vests.' Morgan laughed.

Emily laughed and took a long drink of Macchiato. When she finally set the cup down her expression was serious. 'Derek,' she said, catching his attention, 'what they did to him, in high school, it was inexcusably cruel, and if he ever tells you about it you'll understand.' She said.

'I know princess, I know.' He replied.

* * *

Reid gave an involuntary shiver as he stepped into the interrogation room. It was cool and the grey brick walls sucked most of the natural brightness out of the space leaving the geriatric strip light above the table as the main source of light. He leaned one of his canes against the metal table and lowered himself into the chair. He clenched his teeth as his backside met the worn wooden seat. He could have sworn he felt his spine compress in complaint.

Flipping his bag open he removed the small stack of files on Hardwick and set them on the table.

*'The door of course will be locked from the outside but this button here, it sounds automatically as well as triggers a flashing light to signal the guards when you're finished.' Abner said as he gestured to a small alarm button.

'Thank you.' Reid smiled as he spread out his files.

'Are those the crime scene photos?'* Abner asked as he started to reach for a file.

Hotch took the file from his hands before he could open it. 'We really need to get started. I take it Hardwick is on his way?' Hotch said sharply.

Abner Merrimen's smile faded a little and he nodded. 'Yes, yes of course um...the guards are bringing him down now. I can check if you...'

'Please do.' Hotch said.

Abner turned to leave the room.

'Wait.' Hotch said. 'You need to take those.' He gestured to Reid's canes.

'Oh, yes right. Well spotted Agent.' Abner said, his smile returning a little.

'As I said, it's not our first time in a prison.' Hotch said tersely.

Abner flushed and took hold of the canes as he gave Reid an apologetic look. 'You'll be alright without these Dr Reid?' He asked.

'If it's a choice between him standing and us providing Hardwick with a handy weapon he can stay seated until we've finished.' Hotch said before Reid could say anything.

Abner retreated from the room, canes in one hand, and gently pulled the door closed.

Reid busied himself with the files and kept his gaze firmly off his boss. Right now he would have given anything to have one of his canes in his hand just so he could throw it at him.

* * *

Emily shoved the door to JJ's office open with her toe and staggered in under the weight of take out bags and coffee cups. Without speaking she dumped the paper bags and cup holder onto a small stack of files and dropped into the chair opposite the desk where she found JJ staring at her.

'Emily I am really, really busy right now.' JJ said.

'Clearly. It's four in the afternoon and you haven't had lunch yet, hence the take out. Sandwiches from Angelo's and Vanilla Latte to wash it down.' Emily said.

'I'm really not hungry.' JJ said as she signed another report.

'So your hands are shaking and you have a headache because you had a huge lunch earlier?' Emily said.

'I don't have a headache.' JJ argued.

'JJ, you've rubbed your forehead twice since I came in here and you have a pack of Tylenol on your desk. Granted it's unopened but it's still a big clue for a profiler.' Emily said. 'And in any case I've spent all day doing reports just like you and I have decided that The Man definitely owes us our forty five minutes of lunch break.' She said as she pulled a sandwich out of the bag.

'Emily...' JJ sighed.

'Eat.' Emily pushed a tuna sandwich toward her friend.

'I can't... I'

'Don't tell me you have too much work.' Emily argued before taking a bite of her BLT.

'I...'

'You'll pass out if you don't have something.' Emily mumbled.

'I'm pregnant.' JJ said.

Emily stopped chewing and stared at her friend.

* * *

Reid was glad to be sitting down when Chester Hardwick entered to interrogation room. He wasn't a young man, nor was he particularly big in his build but he was imposing and his presence filled the space oppressively.

Reid cleared his throat and busied himself with spreading out the crime scene photographs until the table top looked like a Jackson Pollock in blood red. His palms were sweating and nervously fiddling with his pen wasn't helping.

*****'Chains left on right?' The guard said.

Reid started to agree but Hotch cut him off.

'That won't be necessary, we're just gonna talk, right Chester?' Hotch levelled his gaze at the man in front of him. The silence lasted for a moment as both men tried to stare each other down.

The guard released the chains, gathered them up and left the room, locking the door behind him.

Hotch circled the table and gestured to one of the chairs.

'Sit down.' He said.

'I'd like this window open, I'll answer any question you have but only if this window is open.' Hardwick demanded.

'Go ahead.' Hotch said before nodding to Reid to commence.

'You were born April 4th 1950.' Reid said.

'Does my birthday really matter?' Hardwick asked.

'It's customary for us to start at the beginning. We want to try to know as much as we can about your childhood.' Reid replied.

'There's nothing to know, it as average. I lived in a nice house on a quiet street. I ate cereal, I went to school, I watched cartoons.' Hardwick said as he stared out of the window.

Hotch's glare deepened. 'I don't have time for this. You didn't live in a nice house on a quiet street you grew up in a series of projects in East Bridgeport, each one worse than the last. You spent your teenage years peeping into your female neighbours windows and burglarising their underwear drawers when you got the chance and you set a hundred small fires for which you spent two years in juvenile detention.' Hotch snapped.

'We've done extensive research Mr Hardwick; at this point lying to us isn't really possible or helpful.' Reid said.

Hardwick folded his arms and continued to stare out of the window.

'Why did you ask us here?' Hotch asked.

Hardwick turned around and smiled. 'I wanted to smell the air.'

'What?' Hotch asked.

'They have me death watch, 24 hour a day isolation and I will be until they take me to the death chamber so I wanted to smell the air one last time before I die. Thank you for giving me that.' Hardwick smiled.

'Let's pack it up.' Hotch said to Reid.

'Shouldn't we at least...'Reid started but was cut off.

'No! Now.' Hotch said as he walked to the door and pressed the buzzer. 'Have a nice trip Chester. You're going where you belong.' He said as he pressed the buzzer again.

'It's five seventeen. Evening hours started at five O'clock. Guard staff's outside with population. There won't be anyone to open that door for at least thirteen minutes and it took me less than five to do this.' Hardwick said as he picked up a particularly bloody crime scene photo. 'While you were doing your research maybe a question or two about security tones would have been a good idea.' Hardwick smiled at Hotch. 'There's no way there gonna execute me next week, not after I kill two FBI Agents.'*

Hotch stepped forward and Hardwick lunged.

* * *

The resounding slam that Hotch's body made as Hardwick shoved him into the metal cabinet was startling, as was the sound of the air leaving Hotch's lungs. He quickly recovered from the surprise of Hardwick's assault, braced himself against the metal door and shoved forward. Hardwick instinctively grabbed the front of Hotch's shirt and dragged him into his chest only to be met by Hotch's fist as it connected with his jaw and sent his heavy black glasses flying across the room.

With Hardwick momentarily off balance Hotch surged forward again and landed another blow, this time to Hardwick's temple. The older man creased forward and for a moment Reid thought that Hotch had the upper hand but in an instant Hardwick was on him with an almost animalistic energy, shoving him forward and sending Hotch tumbling backwards, half landing on one of the ancient chairs. The furniture broke under Hotch's falling weight and Hardwick leapt, his body straddling Hotch's, his hands in Hotch's hair as he grabbed his head and slammed in once into the concrete floor.

The ensuing stillness shook Reid from his terror. He grabbed for his bag and desperately felt for his cell, not taking his eyes from Hardwick who was staring at Hotch's unconscious body. His hand had just closed around the phone when Hardwick rose and turned to look at him.

Reid tried to dial but Hardwick slapped the cell from his hand and sent it skittering to the floor.

'You gonna meet your death sitting down son?' Hardwick asked as he eyed Reid, still sitting in the chair.

Reid swallowed. Carefully he pushed himself up, his hands gripping the edge of the table. Hardwick grinned.

'If you're good I'll make this quick, in fact I probably only have under ten minutes left.' He laughed as he quickly stepped forward.

*'Chester, do you want to know why you killed those women?'* Reid gasped.

Chester stopped for a moment and narrowed his eyes. 'You know what, I really don't.' He said as he grabbed the edge of the table and pulled it sharply, sending Reid and the crime scene photos to the floor.

Reid gasped as his knees hit the ground and the shock travelled up his legs and into his back. He cried out before he could stop himself. He felt Hardwick's hand twist into his hair and yank his head back so he could stare at him. Hardwick's gaze was piercing. Suddenly he let go of Reid's hair and took a step back.

'Get up.' He said.

Reid swallowed, his eyes darting back and forth to find the closest thing he could pull himself up with. There wasn't anything. He re-focused on Hardwick.

'I can't.' He said.

Hardwick's eyes narrowed and he ground his teeth. 'I said get up!' He repeated.

'You don't want to do this Chester. You won't feel the gratification you're seeking, your preference is not in this room, I'm not female, I'm not what you need Chester.' Reid gabbled frantically.

'I said get up and I meant it!' Hardwick said again as he stepped closer to Reid.

Reid took a deep breath as he tried and failed to steady his voice. 'I can't. I left my canes outside. I can't stand without them.

Hardwick's face broke into a wide smile. 'You're a cripple?' He laughed loudly. 'Well now if I was a better man I'd feel at least a little bad now, but I'm not.'

The unexpected kick to his face landed Reid flat on his back and a good two feet from where he had originally fallen. The hot blood that rushed down the back of his throat as his nose broke made him gag and choke. He was trying to wipe his watering eyes and roll onto his side when firm hands grabbed his wrists and pinned them above his head and Hardwick's face hovered above his own.

'I have some information for your study son. I thought you'd be right, about preferences and all, because well, it was always about the sex for me, but we have an interesting situation here because you're not my type and you're the farthest thing away from anything I'd ever want to fuck, but the damndest thing is I'm enjoying this anyway. I'm enjoying it just for the act of killing.' Hardwick said as he pushed Reid's hair out of his face and wiped away the blood from under his nose, making Reid gasp as the weight of his hand pressed into his broken nose.

Reid tried to turn his body away but Hardwick quickly straddled him, keeping him in place. Grasping Reid's wrists in one hand he used his other to grab one of the broken chair legs from the mess of wrecked furniture that littered the floor. Turning the makeshift tool in his hand Hardwick smiled as he viewed the jagged, splintered end.

Reid felt his eyes water with the weight of the man sitting on him. His left leg was starting to go numb and the pain in his back was screaming over the throbbing hot pain in his nose and face. He blinked to clear his vision and desperately tried to yank his hands free when he saw the fractured wooden chair leg in Hardwick's hand.

He had no chance to move before Hardwick lunged and drove the weapon into Reid's stomach. The blow left Reid feeling more winded than agonised. The air was shoved brutally out of Reid's lungs, leaving his throat achingly raw as he heaved great gasps through his mouth.

Hardwick let Reid's wrists go as he yanked at his sweater vest and shirt, pulling both garments up to reveal the stiff material of the back brace. When Chester swore Reid realised what had happened. Instead of driving the chair leg into his body the brace had blocked the blow.

'What the hell is this?' Hardwick growled as he dragged at the brace, the Velcro strapping resisting his pulling. Frustrated Hardwick pulled at the front of the brace where it covered Reid's stomach and managed to expose a fraction more skin. 'This'll have to do. Don't blame me if I break a couple of ribs now will ya.' He grinned as he pulled his arm back once more and this time drove the splintered chair leg straight through Reid's skin.

Screaming, Reid grasped at Hardwick's arms and tugged weakly but it was no good. Drained of all energy he felt his hands slither uselessly to his side, slick with his own blood. He felt the floor shift beneath him and his stomach roll as black spots danced in front of his eyes. He'd started to have the disconcerting feeling of drifting away from his own body when he was slapped, hard across the face.

'Hey, don't go to sleep on me now son. This is the best part.' Hardwick smiled and pulled the chair leg out of Reid's stomach.

That's when the true pain came and Reid couldn't help but shriek. Hardwick leaned back and threw the chair leg away from him. Wiping his brow he surveyed his handy work.

'This is the part where I use my bare hands.' He said.

'Please...' Reid gasped.

Hardwick laughed. 'You really don't have to ask so nicely.' Hardwick pushed the sleeves of his yellow jumpsuit further up his arms and was about to lean over Reid when he was stopped by a loud groan and the sound of Hotch trying to get to his feet.

Reid gasped as Hardwick rolled off him.

'Don't go away. I just have some unfinished business to attend to.' Hardwick grinned in his face and then he was gone.

Reid lay flat on his back, his hands limp by his sides his shirt rapidly soaking in blood as is streamed down his sides. He could hear Hardwick moving about in the room but he couldn't seem to get his brain to tell his head to move so that he could see where he was. His eyelids felt heavy and he let them fall shut. He could sleep, he thought, let go and drift into oblivion and away from Hardwick. His muscles had just started to relax when he heard Hotch groan again.

Hotch! Hotch was out of it and Hardwick was going to kill him.

With every last ounce of strength Reid dragged his eyes open and turned his head. Hardwick was close to him, crouched next to Hotch who was trying to push himself up from the floor. He was clearly concussed, his coordination shot, and he stood no chance against the prolific serial killer.

Taking a deep breath Reid flattened the palm of his right hand against the floor and pushed himself onto his side. He almost passed put when he felt a fresh rush of blood coat his stomach and his spine seize up but he gritted his teeth and kept his focus on Hardwick's back.

Hardwick was talking to Hotch as he tried and failed to get his legs under him to stand. Reid heard Hardwick laugh and watched as he gave Hotch a light shove that sent him sprawling back to the floor. He watched as he shoved his sleeves up again and reached for the piece of broken chair that he had stabbed Reid with.

Reid scanned the area around him and his eyes fell on the metal back of one of the chairs. Rolling again he pushed himself closer to Hardwick and the piece of metal. Hardwick never even turned when he groaned loudly as he pushed himself up into a half sitting position. "_Good,_" Reid thought, _"underestimate me, like everyone else does, keep on underestimating me. Please!"_

Gritting his teeth as another flood of blood streamed from his nose Reid reached out and grabbed the broken chair back. He swayed dizzily as he grasped it with both hands. He had to make his move before he passed out.

'Chester.' He said loudly.

Hardwick jumped slightly at the voice coming from too close behind him. He shifted his body and turned his head to look behind him. The last thing he saw was a flat piece of metal as it drove its way home, straight into his face.

* * *

Everything was swimming before his eyes but the most annoying part was the heavy weight on his chest, the heavy weight of another person. Hotch shoved at the body pinning him to the floor and finally found himself free.

His head was pounding and his stomach was doing horrible flip flops over the metallic tang of blood in the air. Gritting his teeth he blinked to clear his vision and brace his hand on the wall to help him stand up.

Hardwick was lying on his back, his face a bloody mess, and Reid was laying half on top of him.

Hotch swayed and felt his back connect with the wall behind him. He could no longer hear the tone of the alarm and lunged at it to press it again and again.

He staggered forward and fell to his knees next to Reid. Gently he pulled him away from Hardwick, falling onto his backside under Reid's weight leaving him cradling his colleague in his arms.

Reid's head flopped back onto his shoulder as Hotch frantically tugged at the wet sticky shirt so he could find the source of all the blood. He found the jagged hole immediately and pressed his hand over it.

'I need help in here!' He yelled. 'Somebody, I need some help.'

He pulled Reid closer to him and pressed more firmly on the bleeding wound, his eyes never leaving Hardwick's body.

'They're coming Reid, they're coming, just...help is coming.' He whispered into Reid's ear.

**CMCM**


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

AN; If you think there is anything that is totally off medically, please feel free to PM me.

**Chapter Twenty Two**

**The Consultant**

Emily stared at JJ for a moment and then jumped up grabbing the sandwiches and shoving them back into the brown paper bag.

'Come on.' She said. 'We're going out for lunch.'

'Emily it is way past lunch time and I have a mountain of paperwork to do...' JJ sighed.

Emily stopped and looked at her friend. 'Pass it to Reid when he gets back. He'll do it in an hour. Come on, you need a break.' She said firmly.

'And that's fair on Spence how?' JJ laughed.

'It's not but I'll make it up to him later.' Emily smiled.

JJ stared at her for a moment and then rolled her eyes. Grabbing her purse she pushed herself away from her desk and stood up. 'You're right, I need a break.' She smiled, 'Where are we going?'

'I vote that we take this back to Angelo's, grab a table and some hot coffee for me, green tea for you and your hitch hiker, and talk.' She shoved her way out of the office with JJ behind her, a scowl on her face.

'Less of the hitch hiker comments please. It makes me think of Alien.' She said.

'Nice thought!' Emily laughed.

'Nice thoughts? Who's having nice thoughts and who are they about?' Garcia said as she met them in the corridor.

'Hey Garcia, umm we were just...' Emily glanced at JJ, unsure if what to say.

'We were just taking a very late lunch. Wanna' come?' JJ asked.

'Oh sweetie I would just love to but I'm using this brief and unexpected down time in the serial killer calendar to run scans on my babies and I need to be around when they call for momma.' Garcia smiled and waved them off. 'Have fun though, and cake! Definitely have cake and bring some back for the workers.' She called as she strode down the hallway and back to her bunker.

'You're ok with Garcia knowing?' Emily asked. 'I mean the conversation we're going to have is a little private and you still invited her?'

JJ stopped as she pulled on her coat, her brow creased as she thought. 'Yes, I'm ok with her knowing I guess.'

'Then we really don't have much to talk about then do we?' Emily smiled as they walked toward the elevator.

JJ looked confused. 'What are you talking about?'

Emily pressed the button and stared at the metal doors. 'You were ready to tell one of your friends. You might not realise it Jayje but you've already made a decision. You already know what you're going to do.'

* * *

Hotch didn't need to touch the back of his head to know that he had a huge lump forming and he didn't need the swell of nausea in his stomach to tell him he had a concussion. His brain seemed to be expanding and contracting rhythmically, with each throb feeling like his grey matter was actually bouncing off the inside of his skull.

His head was heavy and kept falling forward, his chin brushing over Reid's hair. Each time he felt the contact his head would jerk up with a crescendo of pain and his stomach would threaten to revolt.

He felt as though he'd been sitting on the cold floor staring at Hardwick's body for hours, with the harsh ringing of the alarm system shaking his senses even further. He opened his mouth to call for the guards again when he heard the scrape of a key in the door and closed his eyes against the flood of light that swept the room.

'What... Oh my, oh... Agent Hotchner!' Abner Merrimen slid to his knees next to Hotch as he and two if his guards pressed forward into the room.

Hotch momentarily felt his body relax with the relief the presence of the other men brought until he heard his name called again and felt hands on his skin.

'Agent Hotchner, what happened?' Abner gasped as he laid his palm against Hotch's temple, at the same time as he registered the blood reddening Reid's shirt.

Hotch strengthened his grip on Reid and blinked, his eyes swimming lazily. 'He needs...he needs help, I can't...I couldn't help him, I could hear but I...please...' Hotch looked into Abner's face, for the first time seeing the other mans horrified expression. 'He needs a paramedic.' Hotch finished as he felt himself pass out.

* * *

'I have no idea what I should do.' JJ said as she picked at her sandwich. 'I feel so out of control with this, I mean Will's great and I love him but he's all the way out in New Orleans and I'm all the way out here and I love my job and he loves his and...'

'JJ stop, please, just for a second.' Emily said gently. 'You're trying to figure out too much at once.'

'There's a lot to figure out Emily! I'm pregnant, it's not just going to go away because I want it to!' JJ whispered furiously.

'I know that. All I am saying is that you have the first question answered already so let's cut the other things down to bite size pieces and take it from there.' Emily said.

'What first question? I have nothing worked out...' JJ said.

Emily leaned across the table and laid her hand over JJ's. 'You want to keep it.' She said simply.

JJ stared at her and blinked away the tears forming in her eyes. She gave a small nod. 'I want to keep it.' She affirmed.

Emily broke into a wide smile. 'Then congratulations my friend.' Half standing she leaned even further and pulled JJ into a hug. 'I'll be here for you for anything you need. You do not have to worry about anything.' She said quietly. 'Until I get ditched that is, I mean as soon as Will hears about this he'll immediately move over here to be with you.'

JJ pulled back and laughed as she wiped away her tears. 'Now that is never gonna happen. He eats, sleeps and breathes his home town Emily.'

'And yet when I saw him look at you he was so lost he couldn't have said which state he was in if he'd been asked.' Emily smiled.

JJ blushed and scrubbed at her face. 'Thank you.' She said.

'Like I said, you need anything and I'll be here.' Emily said. 'I mean it, just ask.'

'How about you have Reid get _you_ pregnant and then I can have some company along the way.' JJ joked.

'Yeah, you're on your own sister.' Emily laughed.

'Thought so. So, speaking of Reid, how _are_ things going?' JJ asked.

'Hey aren't we talking about you?' Emily asked.

'I'm tired of talking about me. I'm tired of thinking about me. Give me some juicy gossip to take my mind of everything.' JJ said.

Emily felt her face heat up at the thought of Reid and she picked up her coffee and avoided JJ's gaze.

'What?' JJ laughed. 'You've gone very red at the mention of juicy gossip. Is it good?'

'It's very good thank you, especially last night.' Emily laughed.

'Eughh, I am so off sex right now. It gets you nothing but trouble.' JJ groaned as Emily laughed even more.

As their laughter died down Emily fiddled with her cup.

'Emily?' JJ said.

Emily felt her throat suddenly close up and tears threaten to fall.

'What is it, what's wrong?' JJ asked.

'I think I am in trouble JJ!' Emily blurted. 'Oh not your kind of trouble.' She clarified when she saw her friend's concerned expression. 'It's just, well, I liked him from the first moment I saw him all rumpled and asleep in Gideon's office and I just thought he was hot and when I got to know him I liked his personality and I thought we could have fun and then I didn't think this would happen and then when Garcia said it I knew, I just knew and it's awful and brilliant at the same time like being on a stupid rollercoaster!' She rushed.

'You finally admitted to yourself that you're in love with Reid?' JJ asked.

Emily nodded. 'For once in my life JJ I'm not going to run away. I'm going to tell him and I'm so scared that he doesn't love me back or doesn't want what I want but I'm going to tell him, as soon as he gets back.'

* * *

The room started to come back into focus when Hotch felt Reid's body being pulled away from him. Instinctively he held tighter onto the blood slicked shirt and forced his eyes open.

'Sir, can you hear me?' The paramedic asked as he pulled a pen light from his pocket and began to flick the beam across Hotch's eye line. Hotch winced as a sharp pain raced across his skull and turned his head away.

'What's his name?' Hotch heard the paramedic ask someone. The reply was muffled and Hotch tried to shake his head to clear his hearing only to have the pain swell and rise again making him groan.

'Aaron, Aaron Hotchner, can you hear me?' The paramedic asked again.

Hotch screwed his eyes shut and forced himself not to nod. 'Yes, I hear you.' He swallowed thickly.

'You need to let go of your friend so we can check him out.' The paramedic said.

'Reid, his name is Spencer Reid.' Hotch said as he let go of Reid's shirt.

Opening his eyes Hotch saw the paramedic's concerned face as he quieted everyone and listened to Reid's chest. He yanked the stethoscope from his ears and held onto Reid's wrist as he felt for a pulse.

He looked up and started speaking. It was only then that Hotch noticed a second paramedic kneeling next to them.

'We have a penetrating trauma to the upper abdomen, it's still bleeding, pulse is thready and he's clammy. Breath sounds are a little diminished but not too significant. I'd say it's from the shock.' The first paramedic said as he worked his fingers underneath the edge of Reid's brace. 'There's some bruising here. We may have internal injuries from blunt force trauma. We need to get him in the bus.'

The second paramedic moved quickly, sliding his arms between Hotch's chest and Reid's back as he grasped Reid beneath his arms and moved to lay him on the floor.

Hotch pushed himself back slightly, blinking repeatedly when the first paramedic began speaking to him again.

'Aaron, can you tell me why your friend wears a brace?' The first paramedic asked.

Hotch blinked again, feeling stupid and slow with the fog in his head.

'I didn't know he wore it...I...' He said.

'It's ok if you don't know.' The second paramedic said as he moved the gurney next to Reid.

'No I ...it's a back injury he sustained as a child...I'm not sure of the exact medical diagnosis but he still takes pain killers and sometimes uses a wheelchair. He can't walk without the aid of canes.' Hotch said as he watched Reid being loaded onto the gurney.

'Ok, come on, you should ride in with us. I want to take a look at that head injury.' The first paramedic said as he helped Hotch to his feet. 'You good?' He asked as Hotch swayed.

'Yeah.' Hotch said as he followed them out of the interview room. It was only as the ambulance doors were closing and the vehicle raced away from the prison that he wondered if Hardwick was still alive.

* * *

Erin Strauss tucked the discrete hip flask away in her desk draw and resumed signing the reports that were on her desk. It was no wonder she needed to indulge in a little pick me up every now and then what with the tedium of the job and the tedium of her home life.

The bureau filled her days with politics and paper work and home filled her nights with a teenage daughter with a chip on her shoulder and a well rehearsed and over used speech about her mother's favouritism of her brother.

Erin had always been a working mother and she truly had no idea how to relate to either of her children. It was just that her boy, her baby boy, had always been a much more biddable child than her truculent daughter and so much easier to spend time with and so, when spare time came up, Erin always found herself cheering at little league and watching him dangle from the jungle gym whilst her daughter went with friends to dance class and glee club.

'Glee Club.' Erin muttered as she removed the flask from the drawer and unscrewed the top. 'What's wrong with a girl learning how to fire a goddamn gun.' She said to herself as she took another significant swig.

Closing her eyes she relished the comforting burn of the Scotch as it trailed down her throat. There was nothing Scotch couldn't make better she thought just as her telephone began to ring.

'Strauss.' She snapped into the receiver.

The call was short and to the point. As Erin replaced the receiver she felt the Scotch pool in her stomach and settle. Closing her eyes she thought about the tangled web of paperwork that was facing her now that Aaron Hotchner and a bureau consultant had just got themselves attacked by a convicted felon, a felon in a Federal facility, a Federal facility that would be legally responsible for said consultant.

Erin wasn't completely unfeeling. A large part of her felt panic and fear for her injured subordinates however a larger part of her understood the significant litigious storm heading her way as she shoved the flask back in her drawer and headed for David Rossi's office.

* * *

Hotch's arm ached from holding the cool pack against the back of his head. He idly thought that he ought to swap hands but he was too involved in staring at Reid.

His face was pale, glistening with sweat and he was still unconscious although as the ambulance lurched through the streets toward the hospital he did seem a little more alert, groaning with each corner the vehicle rounded.

The paramedic had stripped away what was left of his shirt and had sluiced at the wound leaving the ragged edges of the injury more visible now that some of the blood was cleaned away. Hotch couldn't stop himself from staring.

They hadn't been on the road long when Reid started to gasp. His eyes didn't open but he had started to surface, his limbs becoming restless, his breathing rapid. Then he started to cough.

'Spencer?' The paramedic leaned over him and rubbed his knuckles briskly on Reid's breastbone. 'Spencer can you open your eyes for me?' He said loudly.

Reid didn't reply but his coughing continued, getting harsher. The paramedic pulled out his stethoscope and listened to his chest again.

'I'm getting diminished breath sounds, we need to step on it Michael.' He called to his partner.

Reid was still coughing, his face growing paler, his skin clammier. Suddenly his eyes flickered open and his hands fluttered above his chest, weakly trying to push the stethoscope and the paramedic away from him.

'Hey, there you are! Spencer I need you to relax for me ok. You're doing really well, you had an accident and you're on your way to the hospital. Can you try to take a deep breath for me buddy?' The paramedic said as he moved the stethoscope back to Reid's chest.

As Spencer pushed away the paramedic's hands once more Hotch dropped the ice pack and leaned forward, grasping one of Reid's hands in his. The coldness of his fingers got Reid's attention and he turned his head as another coughing fit overtook him.

Aaron tried to think of something to say but all he could do was focus on the heaving wound on Reid's stomach which was still seeping blood, a fresh slick that trickled down Reid's side and soaked into the gurney beneath his body every time he coughed.

'Good man Aaron.' The paramedic said, getting Hotch's attention.

Aaron looked at Reid. He had stopped trying to push the stethoscope away and fixed his gaze on to Hotch as his coughing petered out.

'I need a deep breath Spencer.' The paramedic repeated.

Hotch leaned forward, ignoring the throbbing in his head as he did so. 'Reid, listen to me, you need to take a deep breath.'

Reid's eyes widened as he dragged a deep breath in and the paramedic slid the stethoscope over his chest. Reid screwed his eyes up as another bought of coughing took over him. The paramedic frowned.

'What is it? What's wrong?' Hotch asked.

'How far out are we Mike?' The paramedic called to his partner.

'Two minutes.' Mike called back.

Hotch looked at the paramedic. 'What's happening?'

'I'm not sure. Something's going on in there. His lungs are clear but he's struggling.' The paramedic glanced at Hotch. 'And the last thing I need is you passing out on me. Sit back and get that ice pack back on the lump. You're paler than your friend.' The paramedic nodded toward Reid who was still coughing. 'In less than two minutes he'll be in the best hands possible, ok?'

Hotch nodded as he allowed his eyes to fall closed.

* * *

Morgan was on his way back from the break room with fresh coffee when he heard Rossi's door slam against the wall and saw Rossi sprint out, jacket in hand.

'Morgan!' Rossi called as he jogged down the stairs, looking wildly around the bullpen. 'Where's Emily?' He demanded.

'Out. Late lunch with JJ.' Morgan said as he set his coffee down.

'Call them. Now.' Rossi said as he grabbed a hold of Morgan's arm. 'We need to get to Connecticut.'

'Wait Rossi, what the hell is going on.' Morgan said as he pulled out of Rossi's grip.

Rossi turned and stared at his friend, his expression fearful. The hairs on the back of Morgan's neck prickled. He had never seen Rossi look scared, never imagined a situation in which he would.

'The interview with Chester Hardwick, something went wrong. He attacked them Morgan. He attacked Hotch and Reid.' Rossi said.

'You're not...what?' Morgan stumbled over his words.

'They're on their way to the nearest hospital. We need to leave. Get a hold of JJ and Emily. Morgan, now.' Rossi said firmly as he left the bullpen. 'Come find me in Garcia's office.' He called over his shoulder.

Morgan shook himself and grabbed his jacket and cell phone, dialling JJ's number as he followed Rossi.

* * *

Emily glanced at her watch. 'I guess we should head back.' She said.

JJ nodded and finished her drink. 'I suppose it's nothing stronger than green tea for the next few months.' She smiled as they both stood and grabbed their jackets.

Emily was about to reach for her purse when JJ grabbed her arm. 'I meant it, when I said thanks.' She said.

'Any time.' Emily answered. She grabbed her purse and swung her jacket over her shoulder. As she shoved the chair under the table her cell phone started to ring.

'Seriously?' She rolled her eyes and continued putting her jacket on. 'We can't even take a lunch break?' She pulled the cell out of her bag and flipped it open.

'Prentiss.' She answered. She was silent for a second before repeating herself. 'Prentiss. Hello? Hello?' She flipped the cell shut and tossed it back into her bag.

'I thought Garcia fixed that for you.' JJ said.

'She did, twice. Third time was a bust so I gave it to one of the bureau techs and they said it was ok. I mean it's not like we rely on them for our job or safety or anything like that!' Emily grumbled sarcastically.

'If it's important they'll call me too.' JJ said as she searched her purse for her cell. She frowned and set the bag on the table, pulling things out. 'I can't find it.'

'It was on your desk before we left. Didn't you pick it up?' Emily asked.

JJ groaned. 'I must have forgotten. I swear my head is all over the place since this whole baby mess started!' JJ rubbed her hand across her eyes feeling tears well up. 'And I'm so damn emotional all the time. I swear to god Emily if I don't feel like crying I feel like shooting someone. I can't do this!' She cried as she slumped back down in her seat.

Emily brushed JJ's hair out of her face. 'Come on. It's just a phone, not life or death. Let's take a slow drive back. It'll give you time to re-apply all the make-up you've cried off.' Emily pulled JJ to her feet and steered her out of the coffee shop.

* * *

'They're not picking up, either of them.' Morgan announced as he strode into Garcia's office. Garcia swivelled her chair to face him, her face white.

'I saw them about an hour ago, they were going to lunch they should be back any minute.' She said.

Rossi swiped at his beard. 'I'm not waiting for them.' He said bluntly. 'Try them again. If they don't pick up we're leaving. Did you find out if there was any security footage from the interview room yet? He asked Garcia.

'I've requested it and they'll send it straight to my tablet asap. We have twenty minutes before the jet'll be cleared to leave, JJ and Emily might be back by then.' Garcia said hopefully as she grabbed her jacket and pulled a go bag from under her desk.

Rossi stared at her.

'I am coming with you and nothing you can say will change my mind. Sir.' Garcia said as she handed the bag to Morgan. 'I'll call them again on the way to the jet and we'll tell Anderson to re-direct them if they get back before we catch them.' She said as she made shooing motions to both Rossi and Morgan with her hands.

* * *

The emergency room was chaos. The paramedic mentioned something about a pile up on the Interstate and how they'd been lucky to even get a bus to show up let alone an emergency room to fit them in. Hotch didn't feel lucky. He felt cold and headachy and worried for Reid.

At least the pile up meant there wasn't room for them to be separated. They had both been brought into a wide curtained area that held two gurneys and an array of medical equipment.

As he was gently pulled from the wheelchair and seated on one of the gurneys Hotch could hear the paramedic reeling off Reid's vitals to the hospital staff.

'How long has he been coughing like this?' The doctor asked.

'It started in the bus. He was unconscious at the scene. The coughing brought him out of it.' The paramedic said. 'Breath sounds _are_ a little diminished but the lungs sound ok.'

'Do you know what the brace is for?' The doctor asked.

'The guy who came in with him didn't know, said something about an old injury but no details. The patient was too out of it to get anything from him.'

'Ok people, let's get these clothes off and get his pressure back up.' The doctor said.

The nursing staff set to work in synchronisation around the doctor. Hotch couldn't believe the speed at which they cut Reid's clothing off him, laid a sheet across his groin and then set to fixing an IV and various lines into the backs of Reid's hands.

'Spencer, can you tell me what the brace is for?' The doctor asked as he leaned over Reid. 'We need to remove it but first I need to understand if I'm dealing with something significant here.'

Reid's eyes fluttered and he dragged in a harsh breath which made him cough even more. 'Fractured...fourth vertebrae.' He gasped. 'Had...had...' He dissolved into another coughing fit which wracked his body. 'Had surgery...to remove...shards...of bone...and...and kyphoplasty.'

'Ok, Spencer, we're going to roll you onto your side so we can remove it. We'll be as quick and as gentle as we can.'

The doctor nodded to his team and two of his staff helped to roll Reid onto his side. Hotch pushed himself up from the gurney when he heard Reid shriek in pain.

'Your're hurting him.' He said, lamely.

The doctor looked over at him briefly. 'Has anyone assesed this patient yet?' He asked.

A man in dark blue scrubs left Reid's side, peeled off his gloves and tossed them on the floor before pulling a fresh set from his pocket.

'I'm Doctor Reyes. I'm one of Doctor Jennings' interns. Can you tell me your name?' The intern asked.

Hotch continued to stare at Reid until Doctor Reyes put his hand on his arm and repeated the question. 'Can you tell me your name?'

'Hotchner. SSA Aaron Hotchner.' Hotch said.

'You sure look like you took a beating today Aaron. Is it ok if I call you Aaron?' He asked.

Hotch nodded and winced.

'Let's take a look at the back of your head.' Reyes said.

Hotch swung his legs over the side of the gurney as Dr Reyes brushed through his hair to find the wound. The probing fingers hurt but probably not as much as Reid did right now Hotch thought, as he watched Doctor Jennings probe the wound on Reid's stomach and then gently palpate the area around it. Reid groaned and tried to pull he knees up toward his chest. As one of the nurses pressed his legs flat against the gurney and another firmly placed her hands on either side of Reid's head keeping him in place, Hotch was reminded of a bug under a microscope, suffering and unable to move.

'I'm gonna be sick.' Hotch gasped. Dr Reyes grabbed an emesis basin and shoved it into Hotch's hands as his stomach lost the day's contents.

* * *

Emily and JJ had only just stepped onto the jet when Rossi growled at them.

'It's about damn time!' He snapped.

Emily opened her mouth to respond when she noticed Garcia sitting next to Morgan, her hand in his.

'We came as soon as Anderson gave us the message to meet here. Did I miss a case?' JJ asked. 'We were only out an hour...'

Emily let her go bag drop from her fingers onto the bench seat. 'It's not a case, is it?' She asked as she registered Rossi's expression.

Rossi sat back in his seat heavily as Garcia stood up and walked down the aisle toward them.

'Emily...' She started.

'What happened?' Emily demanded. 'Morgan, what is it, what happened?'

Garcia turned back to Morgan helplessly.

'We're going to Connecticut. Chester Hardwick attacked Hotch and Reid during the interview. They're both in the hospital.' Morgan said.

Emily fell into her seat and blindly buckled her seat belt. 'How bad is it?' She asked calmly.

Emily didn't miss the sharp look Rossi sent Morgan. 'We don't know yet.' Morgan replied.

'Then it might not be too bad, they might...they might both be ok.' She said as the jet rose from the runway.

* * *

Dr Jennings slid a stethoscope across Reid's chest. He was still for a second before moving it slightly lower. 'Spencer can you tell me about the pain in your back. Is it worse than usual?'

Reid nodded.

'Do you remember hurting it today?' Dr Jennings asked.

'Fell...backward...onto the floor...but moved ok...after...just ...hurts.' Reid struggled the words out between coughs.

'No numbness in your legs or toes?' He said.

Reid shook his head.

'That's good because I want you to sit up a little Spencer. Do you think you could do that for me if I raise the gurney?'

Reid nodded as he coughed.

'Ok I'll go slowly, alright.' The doctor said.

Jennings moved to the head of the gurney and raised it. As he did so Reid's coughing started to lessen and his breathing eased slightly.

'Better?' The doctor asked.

Reid drew in a shaky breath. 'A little.' He replied as the burning in his chest subsided only to be replaced by the throbbing of his stomach. Now his head was raised he could see his stomach and the mass of blood and bruising that decorated it. He clenched his eyes shut and willed himself not to cry.

'Ok, I need to listen to your chest again and I need you to be really still and quiet for me.' Jennings said as he replaced the stethoscope on Reid's chest. After a moment he straightened.

'Get me a portable x-ray and get Dr Rose out of OR 1.' He instructed one of the nurses. 'Tell her we have a punctured diaphragm and he needs to go up now.'

'What's happening?' Hotch said as he pushed himself up from his gurney.

'Hotch?' Reid groaned as Jennings leaned over him again.

'Spencer we need to get you up to surgery to fix the wound to your stomach. The penetration has punctured your diaphragm and I can hear bowel sounds in your chest. We need to relocate the stomach and mend the tear before the stomach starts to suffer the effects of strangulation.' Jennings explained as a nurse appeared next to him with a clip board. 'I need you to sign the consent for the surgery Spencer.'

Reid stared up at the ceiling and tried hard to swallow down the mass amount of pain he was in. Even when his back was first injured as a child and he had refused to take pain killers he had never been in this much agony. Everything was on fire, his back, his stomach, his chest and his face all throbbed in unison. His vision swam as he tried to process what the doctor had just told him. His stomach, his stomach was in his chest and the thought made him writhe in panic.

'Spencer, I need you to stay calm. This injury is treatable, but we need to move quickly. Spencer? Can you hear me?' Dr Jennings called.

'I can sign, I can sign the form.' Hotch said. 'I'm his supervisor and his medical proxy.'

'Spencer, if you can't sign you can consent for Aaron to sign for you? Do you want to do that Spencer?' Dr Jennings said as he rubbed his knuckles on Reid's sternum, just as the paramedic had done earlier.

The action pulled Reid back to the voice of the doctor. 'Yes. Hotch can sign for me. Please.' He groaned.

Hotch grabbed the clipboard and signed the forms.

'I've signed it Reid, it's all going to be ok, I've signed it.' He said as he shoved the papers back at the nurse and grasped his friends hand tightly in his.

**CMCM**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

AN; To all who have alerted, faved, reviewed or simply read this story so far, thank you for your continued support, encouragement and constructive criticism.

**Chapter Twenty Three**

**The Consultant**

Emily tried not to pick her nails but as she sat on the jet and felt its slow ascent she couldn't help herself. Her thumb nail was scarlet. The colour and the throbbing ache made her stomach roll. Lacing her fingers she pressed her hands into her lap in an attempt to stop.

She kept her eyes down. The jet was silent, completely different to the start or end of a regular case where they'd be discussing the files on the way out and playing cards and chatting on the way back. When cases ended particularly badly the jet would be quieter than usual but there was always some background noise, sometimes nothing more than a low murmur. Today there was nothing, until Garcia's tablet pinged into life and she shot out of her seat and headed to the back of the jet where Rossi was sitting.

The interruption jolted JJ and Morgan out of their thoughts and Emily suddenly found herself under their scrutiny.

'What?' She asked.

Morgan shook his head and ran his hand over his scalp. 'You know, until now I always thought this damn jet got us places too fast and now, it's just not fast enough.' He said.

'Too fast?' JJ said.

Morgan smiled briefly and leaned his head back against the seat. 'We're always on our way to something bad and intellectually I know we need to get there as soon as possible but sometimes...sometimes I like to think that while we're in the air everything has paused, you know, and I wish it could just stay that way for a long as possible, just to give us a bit more time to prepare for what's coming, but the next thing I know we're always coming in to land and we gotta hit the ground running.'

'Reid would call that magical thinking.' Emily said.

JJ reached across the table and grabbed her hand. 'They'll be ok, Reid's with Hotch, he'll have his back.' She said.

'We don't know what happened.' Emily said simply. 'We have a brief message from Strauss and nothing concrete, we don't know how bad it is.'

'Exactly.' Morgan said. 'It might be nothing.'

'Magical thinking, Morgan.' Emily said. 'Just like your jet that pauses time.'

* * *

The silence was oppressive even for someone as stoical as Hotch. The curtained off area that he sat in with Reid was like a bubble, with all the hustle of a working ER taking place behind curtains that might as well have been a thousand miles away; that's how isolated Hotch felt right now.

He sat, back ramrod straight, in an uncomfortable chair, concentrating on keeping Reid awake.

He was aware that he was speaking but he had no idea how long he'd been murmuring platitudes to his friend. He only knew that his head and backside hurt and that his hand was being slowly crushed.

Reid's eyes were screwed shut as he rode a wave of pain so intense that it made his grip on Hotch's hand tighten until both their fingers were white.

'Aghh.' Reid gasped.

'Just a few more minutes Reid, just take it easy and keep breathing slowly.' Hotch instructed.

He looked around wildly for the Doctor but only managed to catch the eye of a nurse who was on the phone, relaying Reid's vitals to someone.

'Nurse.' Hotch called.

The nurse turned to him and held one finger up as she finished her brisk conversation.

'Hotch?' Reid gasped.

Hotch turned back to Reid. He seemed more alert, his eyes fixed on Hotch and he blinked rapidly.

'What...my stomach...hurts...'He gasped and then rolled his head on the back of the gurney. 'Aagh...ahh.'

Hotch stood up and leaned over Reid. 'They're clearing an OR Reid, just a few more minutes and you'll be with the people that can help you the best.' Hotch said.

Reid calmed a little as the wave of pain lessened. His eyes brightened and he looked down.

'Where...my clothes, what happened to...my clothes.' He said.

Hotch clasped Reid's hand in both of his. 'They had to cut them off you.'

'I'm bleeding.' Reid whimpered. 'Why am I...? I...' His eyes began to flutter closed.

'Reid, Reid!' Hotch squeezed Reid's hand, only stopping when Reid's eyes reopened. 'Stay awake.' Do you remember what the doctor told you, about your injuries?'

Reid turned his head and his eyes rolled a little before he managed to refocus on Hotch. 'Emily... I need...where's Emily?' He asked.

The curtain suddenly clattered back and Doctor Jennings and a team of surgical personnel swarmed in.

'He's going up.' Doctor Jennings said to Hotch as they kicked the brakes off the gurney and pulled it into the hallway.

Hotch had to scramble to keep up with the movement. He couldn't have stopped even if he wanted to. Reid still had a firm hold of his hand.

Reid's eyes were wandering and Hotch could see him struggling to find his face in the crowd surrounding him.

They were at the elevator before he knew it. The doors slid open and the gurney was pushed in and Hotch was pushed to one side, his hand jerking from Reid's grasp.

The doors had started to close in Hotch's face when a med student ran past and held the door.

'Is this the penetrating trauma to the diaphragm? These things are never diagnosed in advance and I want in. I just won the toss with Spellman over this beauty.' The student gushed excitedly.

Hotch didn't think, his head hurt too much and he felt sick. He lunged for the man, grabbing fistfuls of white coat in his bloody hands.

He dragged the med student up to within an inch of his face; his toes left just skirting the ground. Hotch's breath came in huge gasps as rage coursed through his body. 'This _thing_, that has you so excited, is a member of the Federal Bureau of Investigation and my colleague and more importantly my friend.' He growled his voice low and hard.

Hotch let the med student dangle in his grip for a second until he felt a hand on his shoulder. Suddenly all the strength left his arms and he felt himself let go of the other man and stumble back.

'Agent Hotchner?' Dr Jennings squeezed Hotch's shoulder. 'Come on, your friend is in good hands now. Let's finish getting you fixed up.'

Hotch stared at the intern who had started to treat him earlier and then back at the elevator. The doors had closed and Reid was gone.

* * *

Rossi closed the feed on the tablet, acutely aware of Garcia sitting opposite him, staring.

'Should I watch?' She asked tentatively. 'I want to watch because I can't stand the length of time this plane ride is taking and I know that when we land we have to get to the hospital and that'll take time also and the happy ever after part of me wants to think that when we do get there they'll both be sitting in the waiting area having had their minor cuts dressed and we'll be able to just scoop them up and take them home but if that was the case then they'd have just called, right, it wouldn't have been some stranger relaying a message to Strauss, I mean boss man would have called wouldn't he, so if I watch then I can be prepared...and I think I need to be prepared.' Garcia took a deep breath and looked at Rossi.

'Kitten, do you _want_ to watch?' Rossi said.

'Yes...no, yes. Yes.' Garcia said.

Rossi slid the tablet across the table and into her waiting hands. As he did so he looked up and caught Emily watching him.

* * *

Hotch found himself back behind the curtain, this time laying on the gurney. The lights were dimmed and he held an ice pack to the back of his head. Dr Jennings was writing on his chart.

'I don't think we need to admit you but I'm gonna guess that you're not going to take my advice and go home any time soon, right?' He asked.

Hotch glanced at the doctor. 'Home is back in DC, and besides, my team are on their way. Until they arrive I'm not leaving Dr Reid alone.' He said.

Jennings nodded. 'OK. I won't sign off on your chart, just yet. It'll give you a couple of hours on a bed; you can get some sleep.' Jennings held his hand up as Hotch looked like he was going to argue. 'While you're here I might as well wake you up every hour or so to check that bang on your head. Now, I suggest you skip the arguing stage and jump right to capitulation.'

Hotch glared.

'Look, Agent Hotchner, he'll be in surgery for some time. He gave you medical proxy, so I'm free to give you updates as soon as I get them and the more rest you get at this point the more useful you're going to be to him when he needs you.' The doctor said as he dimmed the light. 'You have an hour until I come back and check up on you. Rest.'

Hotch lay back and stared at the ceiling panels. Screwing his eyes shut he swiped his palm over his face, catching the tears that had started to run down his face. He sobbed as quietly as he could, thankful for the noise of the busy ER.

Gasping he opened his eyes. What had he done? He'd underestimated Hardwick, dismissed Reid and antagonised the situation, all because he was pissed at Haley and scared of losing Jack. He'd let his personal life affect his work life and in turn endangered a member of his team. How could he face the others and how could he face Reid? Closing his eyes he let the tears come.

The first head check surprised him. One moment he was consumed with guilt, convinced he'd never sleep again, the next he was being wakened by Doctor Jennings checking his vitals. He opened his mouth to speak but Jennings beat him to it.

'He's still in surgery but he's doing well. He's holding his own in there.' The doctor said.

* * *

Emily cracked the window of the SUV. Sitting in the back with JJ and Morgan was stifling her and she felt over whelmed with the desire to yell at Rossi to stop so she could get out and run.

The closer they got to the hospital the greater the feeling of panic that swelled in her stomach, stealing the breath from her lungs and the moisture from her mouth. Why didn't she tell Reid that she loved him last night? Why did she think it could wait? However hard she tried to recollect she couldn't remember her reasoning now.

The silence was getting to her, that and the looks Garcia kept shooting at Rossi. When they were first on the jet Rossi had been tight lipped but Garcia had kept assuring everyone that both Hotch and Reid would be fine. Halfway through the journey she stopped. She spoke with Rossi and then she stopped and Emily didn't have the nerve to ask her why. She'd seen the tablet in Rossi's hands, seen Garcia take it from him and view something and that was the point that she stopped with her assurances. She'd seen something that made her change her mind.

Emily angled her face to catch the breeze, the sudden fresh air stinging her eyes. Blinking she frowned as she felt a steady stream of tears rush down her face. Immediately a warm hand covered hers. JJ smiled at her and squeezed her fingers but she didn't tell her everything would be alright.

'There, up on the left.' Garcia said as she pointed the hospital sign out to Rossi.

In less than a minute they were pulling up and getting out.

* * *

'Aaron Hotchner and Spencer Reid. They were brought in a couple of hours ago.' Rossi pulled out his badge and flashed it to the nurse behind the station.

'Just take a seat and I'll go get the doctor who treated them.' The nurse replied as he pointed to the line of chairs that served as a waiting area.

Emily followed the rest of the team, standing as they settled into the chairs. Her head was pounding and her stomach felt nauseous from both the jet and car and now she found herself trying to find a moment of peace in the noisy ER waiting area. While the others sat she stood, hands jammed in her pockets, eyes fixed on the floor.

She needed to be calm, to find that oasis of inner piece before her world collapsed as she was sure it would. She wanted to be hopeful but life's experience had been a harsh master and she knew that you didn't always get what you wanted and hoping just ended up hurting somewhere down the line. Drawing in a deep breath she started to get her head around the possibility of losing the only man she'd ever loved. The thought made her want to run and never stop.

JJ watched Emily. She wasn't a profiler but the way Emily had started glancing at the exit told her that if she didn't step up and provide a distraction she was going to bolt. Pushing herself out of the chair she glanced at the rest of the team.

'I'm getting something to drink. Anyone want coffee?' She asked.

No one answered.

'Right. I'll get everyone a cup.' She said, grasping Emily's arm on the way out.

'JJ, I don't want coffee.' Emily snapped.

'I know but if you don't walk off some of that anxiety you're going to explode or find yourself hiking back to Quantico before you know it.' JJ replied as she pulled Emily down the hallway, following the arrows pointing to the cafeteria. 'Besides, I could kill for an ice cold glass of milk.' When Emily didn't respond JJ turned back.

Emily had stopped partway down the corridor and was staring into one of the waiting areas. A woman was being comforted by a doctor. She was sobbing and a nurse was handing her a box of tissues.

'Emily?' JJ laid her hand on Emily's arm.

'I can't do this.' Emily whispered. 'I can't wait here for someone to tell me that Spencer is dead or dying, JJ, I can't!'

'Emily, Emily look at me.' JJ demanded. Emily tore her gaze away from the crying woman and looked at JJ. 'We don't know what happened yet or how badly either Hotch or Reid are injured. Until we know for certain we should expect the best.'

'Rossi knows, and Garcia.' Emily said.

'What?' JJ said, puzzled.

'On the jet. They sat together and Garcia passed her tablet to Rossi and then he passed it back. Whatever they were looking at wasn't good.' She said. 'If it hadn't been so bad they would have shared it.'

'You don't know what it was Emily and it doesn't change anything. We don't have the facts yet and until we do it's a waste of energy to focus on what ifs. Spencer will be ok and you can go back to worrying about how you're going to tell him you love him.' JJ smiled.

On hearing her words tears flooded Emily's face and she grabbed her friend in a tight hug.

'I do love him JJ, I really do.' She whispered.

'I know.' JJ replied. 'Now let's get those drinks and get back to that wonderful waiting area.'

Emily scrubbed at the face and followed JJ.

* * *

Hotch jumped, his heart racing. He'd fallen asleep again but something had startled him into wakefulness.

'You feeling ok?' Dr Jennings asked as he wrote on Hotch's chart.

'Yeah, fell asleep.' Hotch said.

'Well your team is here. At least I assume it's your team. The nurses tell me they're taking up half the ER wait area.' He dropped the chart back onto the end of the gurney. 'Are you up to seeing them?' He asked.

Hotch struggled to a sitting position and nodded. 'Any news on Dr Reid?'

'Let me get your team and then I'll get an update from surgical.' Dr Reyes replied.

Hotch leaned back against the gurney and rubbed his eyes. Sleep had left him thirsty. Clumsily he grabbed the water jug next to the bed and poured a cup. It splashed down his shirt as he raised it to drink. When he looked down he realised that his shirt was covered in Reid's dried blood.

* * *

'Aaron Hotchner?' Dr Jennings looked expectantly toward the group of people dotted around the waiting area. As soon as he spoke several of them stood and stepped forward.

'I'm Agent Rossi, a friend and colleague of Agent Hotchner's. How is he?' Rossi asked.

'He's fine. You can go through and see him but please, he's had a hell of a day so far so let's just keep the excitement down if you can.' Dr Jennings gestured for them to follow him.

'What about Spencer Reid, uh, I mean do you have any information on his condition?' Emily said as she grasped onto the doctors arm.

'He's in surgery. I'll get an update shortly.' He said as he led them through the curtained area.

* * *

It was quiet when Reid woke and his body felt heavy and warm. His eyes wouldn't open and his mouth was full of plastic. He could feel himself drooling. He wanted to lift his hand to wipe his face but the most he could do was twitch his fingers.

'Spencer?' A voice said. 'Open your eyes Spencer.'

He tried again to force his eyelids open, this time he was successful, his eyes opening a crack. There was a nurse leaning over him. Her hair was long and black. _Emily?_ His brain suddenly supplied the image of Emily leaning over him in bed, her eyes dancing, and a flirtatious smile on her face. She was leaning down to kiss him. Then the nurse spoke.

'Well hello. We thought you were going to sleep all day.' She said.

The image of Emily vanished and Reid finally registered the forty something nurse leaning over him. He tried to lift his arm but the nurse gently placed her hand on his and held him down.

He tried to speak but the plastic tubing depressed his tongue and filled his throat and all he could do was make a choked moaning sound.

'Don't try to talk. You've had surgery. You're on a ventilator because your breathing was a little depressed and you weren't waking up as quickly as we'd hoped, but it's just a precaution. We'll take it out soon.' The nurse said as she wiped his mouth. 'Get some more sleep. You'll feel better when you wake up.'

Reid let his eyes fall closed and his limbs relax. His entire body felt numb but warm, a warmth that seemed to centre in his stomach and lower back. His back! He suddenly had an image of falling, his back connecting with solid stone floor and then Hardwick, leering over him.

He tried to breathe in too quickly making his throat contract around the tubing which in turn made him gag. The muscles in his throat and stomach obeyed the reflex and contracted. From that moment his stomach was on fire with a pain that left him feeling raw and watery eyed. The nurse was at his side.

'You need to stay still for me Spencer. Just concentrate on me and try to relax.' She commanded.

Tears streamed freely from his eyes now. He couldn't speak, his stomach hurt and nurse who wasn't Emily wasn't helping him and above that, the most frightening thing was his back. It radiated pain every time the ventilator expanded his diaphragm. It shot short bolts of electricity down his left leg leaving it twitching and half numb and for a moment he was twelve years old again and all he wanted was his mom.

* * *

'Hotch!' Rossi stepped toward the gurney and pulled Hotch into a one armed hug.

'Are you ok?' JJ asked.

Hotch nodded. 'I have stitches in the back of my head and a couple of bruises but apart from that I'm fine.' He rasped, his throat still dry.

'What about Reid?' Morgan asked.

'The doctor is getting an update...' Hotch stopped as Doctor Jennings reappeared.

'He's out of surgery and in recovery. I'll take you up to the surgical waiting area. They can give you more information up there.'

'Is he ok to go?' Rossi asked, gesturing toward Hotch.

'He's fine, but do me a favour and use this just as long as you're still on the premises.' He pushed a wheelchair toward the gurney.

As Hotch stood Emily caught sight of his bloodstained shirt.

'Here, you can change into this.' The doctor tossed him a pale green scrub top.

Hotch gazed down at his stained shirt and absently ran a hand over the fabric. 'It's...I...'

'Come on, I'll help you change.' Rossi said. 'We'll catch you up at the elevator.' Rossi nodded to the others to go.

Hotch had unbuttoned his shirt and was wearily trying to push it from his shoulders when Rossi intervened. He tugged the shirt free and handed Hotch the scrub top.

'Your undershirt is stained but I don't want you to catch your death so keep it on.' Rossi said.

Hotch stared at his white undershirt, liberally spotted with bright red splashes of blood.

'Dave I...he caught me off guard.' Hotch closed his mouth and shook his head.

'I know.' Rossi replied.

* * *

Catching up with the team outside the elevator Rossi had just shoved the brakes on the wheelchair when he heard someone calling Hotch's name.

Hurrying toward them was a slight man with glasses and a neat beard. He was holding Reid's canes.

'Agent Hotchner I'm so glad to see that you are alright!' He juggled the canes into one hand and held out the other toward Hotch.

'Everyone this is Abner Merrimen, the assistant governor, from the prison.' Hotch said. 'Mr Merrimen this is the rest of my team.'

Before Abner managed to reply Morgan stepped into his space.

'What happened?' Morgan demanded. 'How the hell did a man like Chester Hardwick get in a position to attack them both?'

Merrimen stepped back as Morgan faced up to him. 'The warden is still going over the surveillance footage and I've been dealing with the coroner and then I came straight here.' He explained. 'So I don't have the full details yet.'

'Coroner?' Rossi asked.

'Oh, well, yes.' Merrimen said. 'You see, Chester Hardwick is dead.'

Hotch leaned forward in the chair, his head in his hands. Immediately Morgan laid his hand on his shoulder. 'Hotch, man, you did what you had to do. You had to protect yourself and Reid you had no other choice!'

'Morgan.' Garcia tried to intervene as Hotch shook his hand from his shoulder.

Hotch leaned back in the chair. His face was white and he was swallowing convulsively.

'It wasn't you.' Emily said suddenly. She turned and jabbed at the elevator button furiously. 'Where the hell is this elevator! I'm taking the stairs.' She turned and shoved through the team.

'Emily wait.' Morgan tried to grab her on the way past. 'Emily.'

'I'm tired of waiting Morgan. I want to see Spencer, I want to know what happened to him and if he's going to be alright! He left his canes behind Morgan.' She shot a look at Merrimen where he stood clutching Reid's walking sticks. 'He wouldn't leave without them, Hotch is covered in blood but he hardly has a scratch on him and Hardwick is dead and...' She took a steadying breath and calmed herself. 'I want to see what's on Garcia's tablet. When we get into that waiting room I want to see everything that's on that tablet.'

Both elevators suddenly burst into life, doors opening and drawing the whole team in.

* * *

Reid woke for the second time to a hand weighing heavily on his shoulder. Blinking he finally focused on a man in grey scrubs leaning over him. His voice seemed far away and his face wavered in and out of focus.

'We're going to take you off the vent now. When I say three I want you to breathe out as hard as you can.'

When three arrived Spencer breathed out, hard. He didn't know if it was supposed to help but it didn't feel like it and he retched and gagged as the thick tubing snaked out of his throat and over his tongue, rattling against his teeth and leaving a thick trail of saliva across his face as it came forth.

His chest heaved wildly and he gasped out shocked breaths into the silence of the room.

* * *

The waiting room was silent and had been ever since the footage from the prison security camera had finished playing out on Garcia's tablet.

Emily sat with JJ's arm around her. All she could think about was the grainy image of Chester Hardwick driving a broken chair leg into her boyfriend's stomach. Over and over again the image played in her mind. The one image she couldn't seem to conjure or even reconcile with all she knew about Spencer was the one where he smashed the back of the broken chair into Hardwick's skull.

She was glad he had done though. If he hadn't then neither he nor Hotch would be alive. Of that she and everyone else was certain.

She glanced at Hotch. His pace was still pale and he was still, focused. Maybe it was Rossi's hand on his shoulder that was keeping him grounded or Morgan's low voice reassuring him that Spencer would be ok.

Emily wasn't so sure as the image played across her mind once more.

'Aaron Hotchner?' The surgeon's voice broke through the silence.

'Yes.' Hotch said.

'Come this way please.' The doctor gestured for Hotch to follow.

'If this is about Dr Reid you can tell us all.' Morgan said.

'I'm sorry. I can only speak with family members or his medical proxy.' The doctor apologised.

'I'm his partner, umm... his girlfriend.' Emily said.

The doctor pauses for a second and gestured for Emily to follow.

* * *

'Ok, he presented with a penetrating trauma to the abdomen which had punctured his diaphragm and caused some internal bleeding. The stomach was displaced but the surgery was successful in relocating it before necrosis or strangulation set in, the tear has been successfully repaired and the bleeding brought under control. We're positive about his recovery but bear in mind that he has suffered significant blood loss so he's quite weak and we are concerned about infection at this stage. We'll be keeping him in the ICU for the next forty eight hours to monitor for signs of this but he should make a full recovery.' The doctor smiled at them and Emily let out a breath filled with relief.

'What about his back injury?' Hotch said.

The doctor frowned. 'Back injury?'

'It's an existing injury and it was causing him pain in the ER.' Hotch said.

'When he fell back.' Emily whispered. 'Did he hurt his back when Hardwick kicked him?'

The doctor held up her hands. 'At this stage our most pressing concern is his stomach and warding off infection. In the interim I'll arrange for the hospital to get a hold of his notes from his primary care physician and we can take it from there when he's a little stronger, unless he tells us that it's presenting him with more pain than normal, OK?'

Emily nodded. 'Can we see him?' She asked.

'Of course. He's only just been moved from recovery so he's still not as lucid as normal and his throat is sore from intubation but I think he'd benefit from seeing familiar faces.' The doctor showed them out and back into the waiting area. 'Down the hallway and to the right. You'll reach the waiting area and a nurse's station. They'll take you to his room. Two at a time though and not for too long. He needs rest.'

* * *

At first Emily thought she wanted to see Spencer alone, to not have anyone encroach on their privacy but as she neared the doorway she was glad she had Morgan at her back. No one argued about who got to go in first. Emily was a given and Morgan was Spencer's best friend.

The room was dimly lit with most of the light coming from a small lamp above the bed. The angle of the light made the shadows under Spencer's eyes look deeper than they were, making them bleed into the bruising across his nose.

His chest was bare, the sheet covering up to just above his hips. He looked so pale that the bandages covering his abdomen almost blended in to his skin tone. Only the deep purple bruising gave any contrast.

Emily hurried forward. Half sitting on the bed she gently slid her hand into his, careful not to dislodge the IV that snaked into the cannula in the back of his hand. She squeezed his fingers.

'Spencer, it's Emily.' She tugged his hand to her lips and kissed the back of his fingers. 'I'm here. I'm here now.' She said.

She jumped when his fingers curled around hers.

'Emily?' He said his voice weak and dry. He blinked but under the warm weight of drugs he couldn't keep his focus on her.

'I'm right here, Morgan's here too.' She smiled as he opened his eyes. The lids were puffy and the whites bloodshot but it was still the best thing she had ever seen. 'It's good to see you awake. I was so scared. Don't ever do that to me again.'

'Why are you crying?' He whispered.

'I'm not.' She swiped at her eyes with her free hand.

Spencer paled. Something tugged at his memory, someone; he was scared for them. Hotch! 'Hotch. Is Hotch ok, he...Hardwick was...' His eyes swam for a second and he blinked repeatedly.

'Hotch is fine man.' Morgan said, stepping forward. 'You need to keep calm or they'll throw us out.'

Spencer smiled weakly at the thought of anyone trying to move the two most stubborn people he'd ever met. He almost had the overwhelming urge to giggle. 'He's ok?' He asked.

'He's sitting outside with one hell of a headache but nothing more kid. He'll be in to see you soon. It's you we were worried about.' Morgan said.

'Why...I...did they...I had surgery right?' Reid remembered, his eyes drooping as he spoke.

Emily nodded. 'You had a ruptured diaphragm and some internal bleeding but they fixed everything. You just need to rest now and get better.'

Reid swallowed. 'Feels numb, my stomach...and my back... it's...' He mumbled and tailed off.

'That's the morphine kid. They got you on the good stuff.' Morgan said as Emily brushed a couple of strands of hair from Reid's face.

'Bad stuff.' Reid muttered sleepily as his eyes finally closed. 'Had it before Morgan. It's bad stuff.'

As the drugs pulled Reid back under Emily let out a shaky breath, caressing his face as she fought back more tears.

'He feels warm.' She said.

'The room is warm Princess.' Morgan replied as he pulled a chair up for her to sit on. 'Come on. Get comfortable and I'll get you something decent to drink. I saw a coffee shop just outside.'

'Do you think he sounded like himself? I didn't think he sounded like himself.' She mumbled.

'It's the drugs and the effects of the surgery. Emily,' Morgan kneeled in front of her as she sat in the chair, 'he will be fine, trust me. Our boy will be fine.'

**CMCM**


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

**Chapter Twenty Four**

**The Consultant**

Emily winced as she woke up in one of the too soft cushioned chairs of the ICU waiting area. She had a kink in her back and her right arm was numb where she had rested her head on it. She'd spent most of the night alternating between this room and Spencer's, desperate to stay with him but understanding that the ICU rules wouldn't allow it and as Spencer was sleeping she had no room for argument with the nursing staff.

She glanced at the clock on the wall opposite and scrubbed at her eyes. It was seven thirty in the morning and she'd barely slept since the night Hotch had called and Spencer had hurriedly left her bed. Three uncomfortable hours in a bad chair couldn't make up for what she had lost.

Her eyes felt gritty and her limbs jumpy with fatigue. Lacing her fingers she stretched her arms out, relishing in the pop and crack of her knuckles as she did so.

'Hey. Coffee?' Morgan's soft voice broke through Emily's haze and made her jump. She hadn't realised he was in the waiting room and finding him standing over her with a takeout cup of coffee in his hand startled her. She held her hands out for the cup.

'You got a little sleep then?' He asked.

'Feels like it.' She groaned as she worked the kink out of her back.

'You had a couple of hours.' Morgan said.

Emily frowned. 'I only meant to have a half hour. You said you'd wake me.' She started to gather her purse and made to stand up.

'Whoa.' Morgan put a hand on her shoulder. 'Cool your jets. You needed the rest. Reid's sleeping Emily. You can't do any good by sitting and staring at him while you're nearly passing out from exhaustion, besides I sat with him while you slept.'

'He's ok?' Emily said.

'He's ok.' Morgan reassured. 'He stirred once but was still pretty out of it. He didn't really know I was there, he only opened his eyes for a minute or two.'

Emily shifted the coffee in her hands. 'Is that normal, what did the nurses say?'

'They checked his vitals and seemed happy with his progress. He's ok Emily.' Morgan said as he moved to sit next to her. 'Drink your coffee. It's the best you'll get for a while unless Rossi picks up more on his way back.'

For the first time Emily noticed that the rest of the team were gone.

'Where did everyone go?' Emily asked.

'Rossi took Hotch back to the hotel and he and I managed to persuade JJ and Garcia to go as well. They all needed rest, especially Hotch, although Rossi said he was gonna room with him, wake him up every so often.'

'Isn't that an urban myth?' Emily smiled as she drank from her cup.

'What?' Morgan asked.

'That whole waking you up every two hours if you have a concussion thing.' Emily said.

'Nah, I'm pretty sure it's legit. I remember getting knocked out when I was a kid, fell off a tyre swing, and my mom woke me up all through the night, but then that could have just been her reassuring herself that I was still there. I scared her silly.' Morgan smiled.

They were quiet for a while as they both drank.

'It didn't go down how I imagined it to.' Emily said finally.

'What didn't?' Morgan said.

'Hardwick. I don't know what I expected but it wasn't what I saw on that tablet.' Emily looked across at Morgan, her eyes wide. 'He would have killed them, I mean that was his intention and he got the best of Hotch...I just...what Reid did, I didn't expect... We all assumed that Hotch took Hardwick down, that _he_ had Spencer's back, that _he_ protected him, but it was the other way around and all I can think about is how I chewed him out for going out with Rossi back in Montana. No wonder he was so pissed with us all. He must have felt so disappointed in me, in my lack of faith in him.'

Morgan was quiet for a moment as he sat, twisting his cup in his hands. 'You wanna know what I think?' He asked. 'I think you can make it up to him now. He's gonna need people in his corner, people who believe in him, not only to help him recover physically but mentally.' Morgan took a swig of coffee. 'I also think it's real easy to underestimate Spencer Reid but you should do so at your peril.' He smiled and bumped the top of his cup against hers gently. 'I think there have been a lot of times in his life when he's had to fight and he's not about to stop now.'

Emily nodded. 'What _do_ we tell him about Hardwick?'

Morgan leaned back in his chair and let his head fall back against the wall with a soft thud.

'Morgan?' Emily pressed.

'The truth, princess, we tell him the truth.' He replied.

'You say it like he's not going to be affected! He killed a man Derek, he's not like you and me, he's not been prepared for the possibility of taking a life, he's not a field agent!' Her voice rose and started to crack.

Morgan tossed his empty cup into the trash and turned to Emily, taking her shoulder firmly. 'He's not trained, you're right, but he did what he had to do, what his gut told him to do and we'll just have to be there for him to help him through it.'

Standing Morgan held his hand out to his friend. 'Come on. Let's go see if he's finished sleeping.'

* * *

Reid felt as though someone had glued his lids shut as he tried hard to open his eyes. Eventually he peeled them back, blinking against the dryness that blurred his vision. He was in a dimly lit white room. His skin felt cool. He was covered to the waist by a thin sheet and a number of snaking tubes that worked their way across his arms, their subtle weight making his movements tentative.

He had vague recollections of waking before, of seeing Morgan and hearing Emily, but wasn't entirely sure if those memories were real. Morgan and Emily were in Quantico and he and Hotch were in Connecticut. His stomach lurched as the memory of what had happened flooded back into his mind. Hardwick had attacked them, he'd knocked Hotch out and...and...used the broken chair to...

Cautiously he moved his hand to his stomach. He could feel the thick pressure of bandages against his skin, the warm itchiness where they covered. Walking his fingers down to the edge of the gauze he paused before he began to press lightly.

The room tilted and his vision danced. 'Oh,' he breathed as searing warmth spread under his touch.

He tried to steady his breathing but didn't succeed as tear after tear raced down his face, running uncomfortably into the crease of his neck, wetting his hair.

'Stop it.' He told himself as he pulled against the tangle of tubes to wipe at his eyes. He'd been assaulted before and back then he was a child and he didn't shed a single tear then. He was strong. He'd had to be.

For a second he almost regained control of his emotions but then he collapsed again as the sense memory of having a splintered shaft of wood gouged into his stomach made itself known. He could still feel the twist of it as Hardwick pressed it home. 'Stop it.' He gasped again as he pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes and cried.

Warm fingers curled around one of his hands and before he knew what was happening a kiss was pressed to his fingers as they were pulled away from his face. 'What...oh no Spencer...I'm here please don't cry, don't cry.' Emily said. 'I'm here now, tell me what it is, tell me what hurts.' She gabbled the litany of words flowing as she pressed kiss after kiss to his fingers and ran her hand through his tangled hair.

'You're here. I thought I was dreaming before. I heard you and I saw Morgan. Did I see Morgan? Spencer asked, his voice muffled by her hair. Gently she pulled back and swiped the tears from his cheek.

The relief in her smile was palpable. 'Morgan's right here. You weren't dreaming but you've been in and out since the surgery.

'Hotch is ok?' Spencer breathed as he tried to shift a little to gain some comfort. The sheet covering his hips shifted a little and he stilled but not before his back roared into life. He gasped sharply.

'Lie still. You've had abdominal surgery and you wanna go leaping around kid?' Morgan smiled as he leaned over Emily's shoulder.

Spencer could hardly breathe through the pain that had wrapped itself around his torso. It was moments before he trusted himself to speak without sobbing.

'Not leaping, just uncomfortable and cold, why is it so cold?' He gasped.

'It's pretty warm in here.' Emily frowned as she brushed his bangs out of his face.

'It's ...aah.' Whatever he was about to say was silenced by a gasp of pain. Spencer pulled his hand away from Emily's and fisted it into the thin sheet. 'Oh...oh.' His face paled and his belly heaved with the deep breaths he was gulping down. His stomach was roaring to life but even that pain was pale in comparison to the spasms his back was sending out. It was close to how he felt when he was first injured and the fear of what that meant made his stomach roll.

'Morgan's calling for the nurse. Spencer try to relax, sweetheart...' Emily said.

The flares of pain started to die back and Spencer opened his eyes. Emily was leaning over him. She looked scared.

'What is it, is it your stomach?' She asked.

Spencer blinked the tears out of his eyes and glanced down at the bandaging on his abdomen. There was a small, damp circle blossoming in the centre, an ugly straw coloured wetness that he couldn't help but stare at rather than answering his girlfriend. What had she asked? If his stomach hurt? When he focused on it he realised that it was still throbbing, leaving him feeling like he'd been winded by a tackle from a linebacker. Tentatively he reached his fingers back to the taut purple bruise that bloomed from under the gauze, brushing the tips over the oddly hot skin.

Emily gently pulled his fingers away from his wound. 'Is it your stomach or your back?' She asked.

He gazed up into her warm and trusting eyes. 'It's...my stomach, it really hurts.' He said. His back would be fine he told himself. Sure it hurt badly now but he'd just been assaulted so it was only to be expected. All he needed to do was rest, just like he did on the occasions where he'd overdone things. That was it, he needed rest and maybe a couple of days using his chair and then he'd be back on his feet and Emily wouldn't have to worry about him at all.

* * *

'Good night's sleep?' Rossi asked.

Hotch glared at him as he pushed himself up stiffly from the mattress. 'No.' He replied.

Rossi huffed a mirthless laugh. 'Yeah, me neither.' He dropped a bottle of water on the nightstand next to Aaron. 'Drink that. You need to stay hydrated.'

'I need coffee.' Hotch grumbled.

'Not according to my list you don't.' Rossi replied as he waved a small white leaflet in front of Hotch.

'Wha...list?' Hotch scrubbed at his face and then tentatively reached toward the back of his head to probe the throbbing lump on his skull.

'Don't!' Rossi snapped. 'And yes, I have a list of do's and don'ts for anyone with a concussion.'

'And drinking coffee is on there?' Hotch asked sourly.

'No. But I doubt it'll help with the banging headache you have so Doctor Dave is making the rules today.'

Hotch pushed himself to his feet and glared. 'You really are an arrogant prick aren't you? You think you know better than everyone?'

Rossi raised his eyebrows as Hotch tried to stumble his way to the bathroom.

'I know better than you at the moment Aaron.' He said evenly.

Hotch stopped and turned to look at his friend, giving an almost imperceptible shake of his head. 'Don't.' He said roughly.

'I know what you're thinking and I know what you're feeling.' Rossi pushed.

'No, you don't.' Hotch hissed.

Dave stepped closer. 'You're not so different to that eager young Field Agent I met on that dark night in Seattle all those years ago Aaron. You think you are but you're not.'

'David.' Hotch warned.

'An irascible, arrogant old prick like me steps out of a cab and into a crime scene and in less than a minute makes one of the best friends of his life and you think I can't see what you're feeling right now?' Rossi said gently as he reached out and held onto Aaron's shoulder.

Hotch tried weakly to push him away before Rossi pulled him into a firm hug.

Hotch felt all the fight leave him. 'I was an ass to him on the drive over here. I didn't want to talk and he thought it was about what happened in Montana. He apologised Dave and I couldn't even accept it, I had to be all holier than thou and reinforce how much he was in the wrong and ...and...' Hotch pushed away from Rossi and stared at him wildly. 'It wasn't even about him it was about Haley...and Jack, we'd been fighting and she's seeing someone else, someone else who's playing father to my son!' Hotch suddenly looked deflated and sank down onto the nearest chair. 'I wanted to feel in control again and I did it by humbling a friend and colleague. I wanted to remind myself who was boss and I was prepared to put him in his place to do it.'

Rossi tried to reach out for Hotch's arm but he pushed him away. 'I told him to read the files, _read the files because that's what you're good at_, I said.' Hotch pressed his hands to his eyes and then dragged his fingers through his hair. 'I guess I'm just lucky that he did more than read the files when Hardwick was about to kill me.'

Rossi sat down next to Hotch and placed his hand on his knee. 'Like I said, I know what you're thinking and feeling right now. The question is Aaron are you going to continue to be an ass and sit here and wallow or are you going to get a shower and get dressed and come to the hospital and explain to Reid what you just explained to me?'

Hotch looked away and shook his head.

'Aaron you were angry, you weren't at your best but you did not make Hardwick pull the stunt he did. What happened was Hardwick's fault, no one else's and you and Reid both have come out the other side.' Rossi said.

'But...' Hotch started to speak but Rossi cut him off.

'No buts Hotch, welcome to the fallible world the rest of us mere mortals inhabit. Now, as my favourite niece likes to say, build a bridge and get over it.' Rossi headed into the bathroom and started the shower running. 'You got a half hour before we meet the others in the restaurant where you _will_ eat breakfast, without coffee, and then we _will_ go visit Reid.'

* * *

'Hello Spencer, I'm Joyce, one of the nursing staff. How are you feeling?' The nurse deftly drew Spencer's wrist into her hand and took his pulse as she read off the tape of paper that was listing his readings from one of the machines. 'Your friend says you woke up in pain. Can you tell me about it?' She asked as she checked the bag hanging from the IV pole.

Spencer's eyes jerked open at the sound of the new voice. His head was reeling with the brief drop into deep sleep that he had encountered. It was the drugs, they kept tugging at him, making the morning disjointed. Hadn't he just been telling Emily that his stomach hurt?

'Morgan called the nurse.' Emily said as she leaned over him, reading the confusion in his face.

'Can you tell me about the pain Spencer?' The nurse asked again.

He blinked and looked at her. 'It's ok, I'm...ok.' He struggled out.

'Right, do you want to try me again with that?' She smiled. 'You need to say when you're in pain Spencer. You're only ten hours out of surgery; your incision site is going to hurt.' She scolded gently. 'Do you need me to give you something?'

Reid shook his head. 'I'm ok, really.'

She looked at her watch and frowned. 'Dr Stanley will be back on the floor in ten minutes. I'm going to get her to come in and take a look at you. She'll up your meds if she thinks you need it. Looks like your dressings need changing so we'll do that at the same time.' The nurse smiled at Spencer and moved toward the door. On her way out she pressed her hand onto Morgan's arm. 'It's evident that he's in pain. I'll be back in ten with his surgeon. She'll want to see how he's doing post op and she'll discuss his meds then, and we'll get that cleaned up and changed.' She nodded toward the stained dressing on Spencer's stomach. Giving Morgan an encouraging smile she pushed the door open and was gone.

'Can I have some water?' Spencer said as Emily sat back down by his side.

'Sure thing kid.' Morgan said as he filled a paper cup and held it out for Emily. Spencer tried to push himself forward to drink, stopping suddenly as both his back and stomach protested.

'Wait, here.' Emily cradled her hand gently behind his head and held the cup to his lips. 'Take it easy.' She said as he drank slowly.

'Can I see my chart?' Spencer asked, waving his hand at Morgan. Morgan shrugged and passed the chart from the end of the bed.

'Morphine, it's the drugs that make you thirsty. I've had it before. I recognise the effects.' He said as he read the first few lines of notes and then let his head fall back to the pillow, his hand still clutching the chart.

'Yeah, you told me it was a bad drug.' Morgan smiled.

Spencer wrinkled his nose in confusion. 'I did?'

'Yeah, you were pretty out of it.' Morgan said.

'It's not bad at all. It's efficacy in reducing pain is undisputed.' Spencer replied as he held the chart up to read again. There was nothing about his back injury on the chart, just his stomach. He let the chart fall onto the bed next to him and stared up at the ceiling.

'Hey, you ok?' Emily asked.

Spencer nodded but was silent. After a few moments his eyes slid back to Emily and Morgan.

'What happened to Chester Hardwick?'

* * *

The breakfast table grew silent when Hotch sat down. His stomach flipped as he looked at the food in front of him.

'It's just a toasted bagel Aaron.' Rossi said. 'You need to eat.' He set a glass of juice next to the bagel and sat down.

'How's the head this morning, Sir?' Garcia asked quietly.

Hotch nodded cautiously. 'It's better, thank you Garcia.'

Penelope set her coffee cup down and took hold of Hotch's free hand. Hotch pulled back on instinct but her grasp was too firm.

'I know that the hand holding is unprecedented sir but I just wanted to say how happy I am.. we all are.. that you're alright, I mean we saw what happened on the security footage and well...I'm glad you're alright.' She patted his hand and let it go.

Hotch looked away from Garcia's gaze and cleared his throat. 'I...'

'It wasn't your fault Hotch.' JJ said softly but firmly. 'It wasn't.'

* * *

'Everything looks good. There's a small amount of oozing from the site but it looks clear. Let's re-dress the wound.' Dr Anne Stanley nodded toward the nurse and straightened up. 'Okay, let's talk about pain management.'

Spencer couldn't help but stare at the livid scar running across his stomach. He was expecting to see a row of neat black stitches but instead the wound had been stapled. His stomach flipped as his mind raised the unwanted question of how they'd be removed. His fingers twitched with the desire to press the row of metal teeth but the burning slow boil of pain that surrounded the area warned him against it.

'Spencer.' Emily squeezed his hand. 'Dr Stanley is talking to you.'

Spencer looked up at her, taking in the worry in both her and Morgan's faces. He felt a brief twist of satisfaction in that look. He was worried too, worried by how they had both remained silent when he asked about Chester Hardwick, how they both looked to each other and then looked equally relieved when the doctor came in and disturbed them.

'Spencer.' Emily repeated.

Spencer blinked. 'What?'

'I wanted to discuss your pain management.' Dr Stanley repeated. 'I can see that you're in some discomfort.'

Spencer blinked and cleared his throat. 'I'm just a little uncomfortable right now.' He said, his voice scratchy. 'And cold.' He felt his skin flush as he glanced down and for the first time realised that he was essentially naked, save for a thin sheet, in a room full of people.

'I'll get you a gown and a thermometer.' Joyce said.

Dr Stanley nodded as she removed a stethoscope from around her neck and pressed it against his chest. 'Sounds good. Can you sit forward a little for me?'

Spencer swallowed and took in as much breath as he could. Pressing his fists into the mattress he levered himself forward slightly, just enough to raise his head and shoulders from the pillows. He held in a groan of pain as Dr Stanley slid the stethoscope across the top of his back.

'Alright, sit back.' She said.

Spencer tried to grit his teeth but it didn't stop the wheeze of pain that hissed between his lips.

Dr Stanley frowned. 'You really shouldn't be experiencing that level of post operative pain Dr Reid.' She said.

'I'm not, really. My back is stiff that's all, nothing more than is usual for any period of inactivity I might experience.' He said.

'It doesn't hurt more than usual?' Dr Stanley pressed.

'No.' Spencer replied.

'You need to tell the doctor if it does Spencer it's really...' Emily started.

'I just did tell her Emily and I _am_ fine apart from being cold and tired and over stimulated by the amount of people in my room who are stopping me from resting which is contrary to the main purpose of any stay in a hospital!' He snapped.

Emily blinked under the assault of Reid's crankiness.

'Easy Reid. The doctor's just trying to do her job.' Morgan said. 'If we could get that gown I think my friend here would feel a lot more comfortable.' He said as he smiled at the nurse.

'We'll get something to cover you up and we'll take a rain check on those meds for the time being but I'm expecting you to tell us what you need Spencer. Dr Stanley said as she scribbled on his chart. 'I'll be back in a couple of hours to check the incision again.'

Spencer screwed his eyes shut and fought against the tears that threatened to spill over. 'I'm sorry, Emily I'm ... really...'

'Shh,' Emily stroked his hair, 'You're tired and hurting it's ok.'

Spencer nodded and closed his eyes again just as the nurse re-entered the room with a gown and thermometer.

'Let's take that temperature.' She said as she uncapped the digital thermometer and gently fitted it into Reid's ear. After a moment it blipped and she took the reading.

'Is it ok?' Emily asked.

'A little elevated but nothing to worry about. Now how about you two give Spencer here a little privacy while he gets dressed? You both look like you could use some terrible coffee and we have just the cafeteria you can get some from.' She smiled.

'Can I have some?' Spencer asked as he felt drug induced sleep tugging him under again.

'No!' They replied in unison.

Spencer almost smiled but sleep pulled him away and into a half dream where Emily hesitated a little too long each time he asked about Chester Hardwick.

* * *

Getting the gown on was humiliating and Reid was relieved that neither Morgan nor Emily, especially Emily, had been there to witness it. He'd tried so hard to block out the pain but had eventually cried like a child as the nurse helped him sit up so she could get him dressed.

He fobbed off her concerns by saying that he was thinking about what had happened to him. The truth was that his back was screaming and his left leg felt numb, while his foot was afflicted with sudden rushes of warmth, a side effect he knew was from nerves being pinched, a combination that scared him when he allowed his mind to question what extra damage the attack had caused.

Every time his mind strayed to those thoughts he stamped them down again. He told himself that nothing was wrong, no further damage had been done and as soon as he rested he would be ok and back to using his canes and back to his life with his job and his friends and Emily. Unless...unless the damage was significant and his days in a wheelchair had arrived sooner than he had feared they would. If that happened how could he allow Emily to waste her time with him then?

Laying back in the pillows Reid stared up at the ceiling ignoring the steady stream of tears that snaked out of the corners of his eyes and ran into his ears and hair, finally wetting the pillow at the back of his neck. He sniffed loudly and groaned in frustration.

'_I just wanted more time_.' He whispered to himself.

* * *

'Hey, you're looking better.' Morgan said as he and Emily met Hotch and the rest of the team outside the elevator. 'You want coffee? I have a couple spare.' He said, nodding toward the take out tray in his hand. 'I guessed you might all be upstairs when we got back.'

Hotch reached for one of the cups at the same time as Rossi intervened.

'No. He does not want coffee. He wants plenty of water.' Rossi said.

'How's Reid?' Hotch asked as they stepped into the elevator.

'He's been awake a bit more. He's alert, in some pain, but alert.' Emily said.

'Prentiss I...' Hotch looked toward Emily. 'I'm...'

'If say you're sorry then I think I might have to just kick your ass. Sir.' Emily said. 'Anyone of us could have taken that custodial and anyone of us could have ended up in that situation.'

'Prentiss is right Hotch. You gotta let it go.' Morgan said. 'You gotta let it go so you can support Reid through this.'

Hotch looked questioningly at Morgan.

'He asked about Hardwick.' Emily said.

* * *

Hotch rarely felt nervous. His time as a prosecutor had tempered any feelings of self doubt in most situations but entering Reid's hospital room that day made his stomach quiver with excess adrenalin, even with the rest of the team surrounding him.

'Hey, you ready for some visitors?' Emily asked quietly as they entered the room.

Reid's eyes flickered open, the fog of sleep clouding his thoughts. 'Oh, yeah. Sorry, I fell asleep. It's all I seem to be doing this morning.' He mumbled.

Emily stepped to his side and lifted his hand between hers. 'I'm not surprised. You've had a rough few hours. That looks better though.' She nodded toward the pale blue gown he was wearing. 'And you definitely feel warmer.'

He smiled and his eyes started to fall closed again. Emily squeezed his hand gently. 'Hey, visitors? I don't think I can hold them back much longer.'

'She's right kid. Any moment now and Garcia's gonna take me out with her shoe just to get past me.' Rossi said.

Reid looked past Emily to find the team waiting half in and half out of the door. Garcia, taking her que from Rossi, pushed into the room clutching a toy kitten.

'I wanted to get balloons but apparently I have to wait until you're in a regular room, so...a kitten for my injured kitten, which I have to take back with me again until you're in a regular room.' She said as she leaned over the bed and hugged Reid as much as she could.

'We really haven't had you for all that long Spencer Reid. We're not ready to lose you just yet.' She whispered into his ear. 'My heart couldn't take it Junior C Man.' She straightened and cradled the plushie toy in her arms.

'Junior C Man?' Reid said.

'I know. It's the best I can come up with and it's as close as I can get to Junior G Man, which is what I really want to call you, and judging by what went down in that prison I think you should be upgraded to fully fledged G Man right now.' She laughed as she wiped a stray tear from her face.

'Hey mamma, don't go demoting him. He makes more dollar consulting.' Morgan smiled as he took Garcia's hand and pulled her to him.

'Aint' that the truth.' Rossi joked. 'You don't look half bad kiddo. You feeling ok?'

'Sore.' Reid said, jumping a little as JJ came to his side and took his hand in hers.

'We are so relieved that you both are safe.' She said as she looked at Hotch and then back to Reid.

Hotch was struggling to look at Reid until JJ spoke and then it was as if he couldn't take his eyes off him. He was alive, safe, no longer bleeding in his arms. For the first time in twenty hours he felt as though he could breath.

'Why don't we go get some of that wonderful coffee they serve here.' Rossi said.

Reid's brow crinkled. 'But you already have cup in your hand.' He said.

Rossi made a show of pondering the take out cup. 'So I do, but let's take a walk anyways shall we?' He held his hand out and ushered Garcia and JJ out.

'I'm gonna stretch my legs too. Back in five pretty boy.' He nodded to Reid and left.

Hotch waited for the door to close completely before he spoke.

'Reid, what happened...I antagonised the situation...I' Hotch sat heavily in the chair next to Reid. 'I'm sorry I allowed you to get injured.' He said simply.

Reid frowned. 'Did you not try to stop Hardwick? He asked. 'From my perspective I distinctly remember you trying to fight him off but he had the element of surprise to his advantage.'

'I did but I should have known something was off. The way he kept us waiting around, he orchestrated every step and my not seeing his game plan has resulted in your being hurt, badly. You shouldn't have even been in that situation...'

'The situation of doing the job I'm paid to do?' Reid asked. 'Hotch, what you said before about my going into the field with Rossi, you were right. You were right about that scenario, but you're wrong about this one. I was in the place I needed to be to do my job and I understood the implications of placing myself in such a role. Don't you think that my knowing what happened to the team with Bale and then Brietkopf illustrated perfectly what _can_ happen in this line of work? I won't tell you I wasn't scared, terrified even, but I _was_ prepared Hotch.' He said.

Hotch cleared his throat. 'Reid I need to speak with you about Hardwick.'

'I think he's dead.' Reid replied quietly, his gaze fixed to the ceiling. 'I think he's dead and I think I killed him.' He squeezed his eyes shut and willed back the tears that were threatening to escape. Opening his eyes he slid his gaze over Emily. It only took that one glance to know he was right.

'When I was a kid my mom didn't allow a television in the house. She thought that while she watched it, it watched her, but my dad, before he left, bought me a little hand held one that I hid in my room. I used to watch it under the bedclothes when I was supposed to be sleeping. I watched anything and everything, things that always weren't age appropriate and I remember how overblown the physical violence was, how the bad guy could pound on the hero and he'd still get up and be relatively ok, but I knew it never made sense, that the pressure one needed to exert to shatter a man's nose and force it back into the soft tissues lining the brain was not as great as television allowed, that to punch a man repeatedly could easily result in death, that to hit a man in the face with a flat piece of wood and metal could kill him.' His voice had raised and he wasn't taking breaths between sentences. Emily laid her hand on his shoulder. He winced as the movement caused a fissure of pain to lance his torso.

'Spencer, look at me,' Emily smoothed his hair. 'You protected yourself and Hotch. There is no doubt in anyone's mind, anyone who saw the security footage, that he would have killed Hotch and then killed you and then compounded his victim's families pain by escaping his death sentence.

The tears now ran freely down Spencer's face. 'I know. I know that but it doesn't make it feel right in here.' He pressed his finger tips to his chest, just above his heart.

'It never does Reid, it never does.' Hotch said as he too leaned forward and took his hand.

* * *

'How is he?' JJ asked.

'He's sleeping. Hotch and I talked to him about Hardwick. After that he was exhausted.' Emily said as she sank into one of the waiting room chairs.

'How did he take it?' Morgan asked.

'How you'd expect him to take it.' Hotch replied. 'We all know how it feels with the exception of Garcia. It should be easier when you know the person you've killed is a monster but it doesn't does it.' Hotch said wearily.

'I'm glad.' Garcia said forcefully. 'I mean, I'm glad that it feels bad, for a while anyway, I don't want it to, I don't want any one of my family to suffer but that feeling you have makes you better. It makes all of you better because you're _not_ monsters. You're not like the Hardwick's of this world.'

Rossi put his arm around Garcia's shoulders. 'You're right kitten, but it doesn't make it any easier to swallow.'

'I'm gonna go back in and sit with him.' Emily said.

'You want company?' Morgan asked. 'I'm happy to stay but if you want some alone time I'm happy to leave too.'

Emily shook her head. 'I'd like the company and I think it helps Spencer to have you here.'

'Well we'll go get some more rest and then tonight I am putting my foot down and you two are spending a whole night at the hotel while we take watch.' Rossi said, shaking his head at Emily when she started to protest. 'No arguments.'

* * *

Morgan shifted in his chair, trying to work the ache out of his neck. The room was dimly lit and the only other occupants were both asleep. Emily had her head resting on the bed next to Reid's hand and Reid was dozing.

Morgan had thought he was more deeply asleep as his breathing was heavy and slow but a couple of minutes ago he had opened his eyes, looked at Morgan and then closed his eyes again. Since then he'd been a little restless, mumbling in his sleep. It wasn't enough to wake Emily though. Morgan could see that she was exhausted, not only in her face but in the way she held her body, the way her eyes had dulled.

'Did you know...Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department...has... 5,100 members of...of...staff.' Morgan jumped when Reid spoke, his voice slurring slightly.

'I knew you were awake.' He said, rubbing his face. 'Can't sleep? Do you need something for the pain?' Morgan asked.

Reid stared at him. 'You have...a gun.' Reid said staring at him, blinking.

'Yeah...' Morgan said slowly. He stood up and flicked the lamp on over Reid's bed, noticing how his eyes swam lazily in the brighter light. 'You feeling ok kid?'

Morgan stalled a little when he recognised a flash of fear flicker across Reid's face.

'Kid?' Morgan said as he laid his hand on Reid's shoulder.

'was'n... accident...my mom...you don't need to talk to my mom..' Reid murmured.

'Shit! Prentiss. Wake up!' Morgan hissed as he reached over Reid and shook Emily's arm.

'What? What is it?' Emily said wearily.

'He's hot, too hot and he's not makin' any sense.' Morgan said as he fumbled for the button to call the nursing staff.

Emily pressed her hand to Spencer's face, the sickly heat from his skin making her palm tingle before it even made contact. 'He's burning up!' Emily shoved away from her chair and sprinted out of the room and into the corridor. 'I need a nurse! Somebody, please, I need help!'

**CMCM**


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

Coffeebeads: Ok, ok I surrender. Here you are...

Noskilz: That line of dialogue, from Merry, that sparked this whole thing off, well, here it is again, after 25 chapters and all this time (so long you probably can't even remember it)!

Oh lord will I ever finish this fic? The answer is yes. I have too much respect for every one of my readers, alerters, favouriters and reviewers to abandon it even if it is proving hard going at the moment. Thank you for bearing with me.

**Chapter Twenty Five**

**The Consultant**

Emily felt the air stick in her throat as the nurse pushed past her toward Spencer's bed. Morgan's hand was still against his forehead and he looked more scared than Emily had ever seen him.

'He's burning up.' He said helplessly.

The nurse gently tilted Spencer's head to one side and fitted the thermometer into his ear. After a moment the device beeped and she lifted it and studied the readout.

'What is it?' Morgan asked.

'His temperature _is_ elevated, I'll page his doctor. Get her to take a look at him. Try not to worry.' She said as she turned to leave.

'Worry?' Emily said. 'He's just out of surgery and he has a fever!'

'Like I said, I'll page his doctor.' The nurse repeated.

Emily jumped as a loud scraping noise hit her ears. Morgan had dragged a chair next to the bed and was pressing a hand to Spencer's shoulder. 'Kid, are you with us? Reid.'

Spencer moaned quietly and struggled to open his eyes.

'Morgan?' Spencer said quietly. 'Did I fall again?'

'You're in the hospital, do you remember?' Morgan asked.

Reid's eyes cleared a little and recognition flickered across his face. He shoved a hand through his sweaty hair and swallowed, his mind moving sluggishly to catch up to where it should be. 'Oh, yeah, Hardwick...was it Hardwick? Hotch! He knocked Hotch out, we need to help...'

'Spencer, Hotch was in here a while ago. He's fine apart from a bang to the head. You saw him.' Emily soothed as she stroked the side of his face. 'He feels really warm.' She said as she looked across at Morgan.

Reid relaxed into the pillows and recognition finally lit in his eyes. 'Emily?' He breathed.

'I'm right here.' She replied.

'It's...hot...can I...is there some water?' He mumbled, his tongue feeling thick in his mouth.

Emily moved to the pitcher next to the bed and filled the small glass as Morgan moved forward to support Reid's shoulders as he drank.

'You had us scared man!' Morgan said. 'You weren't making sense there for a minute, and coming from you that really didn't sit right with me.' Morgan tried to joke.

'What? I...what was I saying?' Reid mumbled as he sipped the water.

'You gave me a snapshot of the LVPD staffing levels and then you started talking about your mom.' He said.

Reid shifted in the bed and winced. 'My mom?' He repeated as he twisted the sheets in his fingers.

'Hey, Spencer, look at me. Look at me.' Emily ordered until Spencer finally looked at her, his eyes swimming sleepily. 'Don't worry about it. You only just woke up and your temperature is a little elevated. It's making you confused that's all. The nurse has gone to get your doctor.' Emily said.

'But... my mom...I don't know why...' Spencer's eyes fluttered closed and he was asleep before he finished the sentence.

'Where the hell is that doctor?' Morgan said, glaring as he shoved himself out of his chair and began to pace the small room.

'Right here.' Reid's surgeon said as she pushed through the door and into the room just in time to hear Morgan's frustration. She plucked the chart from the end of the bed and frowned. 'How long has he been sleeping?' She asked Emily.

'Only a few moments. He woke before and he was confused, he said he was hot, he _felt _hot to the touch. He had a little water and then fell back to sleep.' She said.

'Could you undress his incision site?' The doctor asked the nurse who had returned with her.

The nurse pushed the sheet down a little and pulled Reid's gown up to bare his stomach and the white gauze taped over the wound. She peeled it back delicately to reveal the row of staples lining the damaged area. The skin was deep red and angry looking and the site oozed slightly. Despite all she had seen in their line of work Emily had to look away and only let out a breath when she felt Morgan's steadying hand at the small of her back.

The nurse re-taped the gauze and pulled Reid's gown back in to place as Dr Stanley rattled of a set of instructions.

'Let's talk outside.' The doctor said to Emily and Morgan as she gestured toward the door.

'Spencer's fever is just on the border of what we would class as high grade and this is most likely an indication of an infection.' The doctor said once they were in the waiting area.

'You said that might happen.' Emily said.

The doctor nodded. 'I'd hoped that it wouldn't but it was always a significant risk. I've ordered blood cultures and started him on a strong antibiotic as a precaution. The nursing team will be placing ice packs around his body to get his temperature down so, fingers crossed, we should see a drop in the fever soon and him being more coherent when he wakes. We'll keep monitoring him over the next few hours so just sit tight, we've caught it quickly and the antibiotics and the rapid cooling should see his status improving quickly.'

* * *

Hotch hunched over the tablet and pressed play on the security footage for the third time.

'Does re-watching it make it any better?' Rossi muttered from his bed. 'I only ask because I cling to the notion that my nap is being interrupted for something worthwhile.'

'It's visual only Dave and my watching it doesn't make any noise so I find it hard to comprehend what exactly is disturbing you.' Hotch said as he turned the tablet off and swung his legs off his own bed.

'You're supposed to be resting.' Rossi said as he stood and worked the kinks from his back. 'Believe me, take all the rest you can now and you might, just might, look half as good as I do when you reach sixty.'

Hotch gave a small smile, grateful for his old friend's attempt to lighten his mood.

'To look at him you wouldn't think he could hit so hard would you?' Hotch said as he tossed the tablet onto the comforter and reached to rub the back of his head. 'Watching it back he looks like any trained agent in that room.'

Rossi nodded. 'Are you forgetting he that he hauls himself around on those damn sticks all day every day? The kid's build up some muscles in those shoulders. Besides, people can find great strength when they need to Aaron.'

Hotch stared at Rossi and sighed. 'Really? I've never felt weaker Dave. Everything is collapsing around me and when I try to grab a hold of those things I make everything worse.'

'Not true. Things are happening that are out of your control and that's not a feeling that you're at ease with, but you have to accept that this is life Aaron, craptastic life in all its glory.' Rossi sat down next to Hotch. 'So Haley had an affair and left. Find amicable ground with her to maintain access to Jack. So your son isn't living with you. He is _living_ though Aaron, make the time whenever you can to take that relationship and cement it. It might not be as much or as often as you'd like, but Jack will grow up always knowing that you were there. And the job? Christ Aaron, no one is a better unit chief than you. Remember that would ya', just for once, and while you're at it cut yourself some slack and forgive yourself.' Rossi took Hotch's face in both hands and gave him a hard kiss on his forehead before moving across the room and grabbing Hotch's Go Bag. He rummaged around for a moment before straightening and flinging something at Hotch.

Hotch caught the flying tie in one hand.

'Enough self pity. You have precisely five minutes to put on your version of a cape and tights and get back to work Unit Chief Hotchner and then we'll have time for one scotch before we go back to the hospital. You can be enlisted into the exclusive David Rossi ex husbands club.'

'Drinking, with a concussion?' Hotch questioned as he decisively knotted the red silk and straightened his shoulders.

'Ah, screw the list. One damn drink won't kill you.' Rossi grumbled.

* * *

Emily watched Spencer's adams apple bob convulsively. He was probably thirsty she thought as she watched a stream of water snake along the ice pack laid on his neck.

Dr Stanley had ordered the ice packs to be placed strategically to try to bring his temperature down. He'd been stripped of his gown and had one pack placed on his neck, one on his groin and one under each of his arms. A single sheet covered him to just below his waist and the temperature in the room had been lowered slightly. Just looking at him made Emily shiver but Spencer's body glistened with a sheen of sweat and when she took his hand in hers his skin still felt dry and heated.

'Any change?' Morgan asked as he came in from taking a break and eating in the cafeteria.

Emily shook her head. 'The nurse was just in here. She took his temperature and checked underneath the packs.'

'Yeah, that'd be one hell of a case of freezer burn.' Morgan added wryly.

'Just what he needs right now.' Emily sighed.

'Couldn't think of anything worse.' Morgan smiled and squeezed her shoulder.

'Well, the nurses aren't using the _ear_ thermometer anymore if you get my drift. Apparently down there's more accurate.' She said as she nodded briefly toward the lower half of Spencer's body. 'Do you think that's worse?' She tried to smile as Morgan winced but her face crumpled as she held back a sob.

'Hey, hey.' Morgan soothed as he knelt in front of Emily and took hold of her hands.

'I'm making jokes Morgan! He's like this and I'm making jokes.' She said as she blinked back the threat of tears. 'Do I really suck that much as a person?'

Morgan hooked his hand around the back of her head and kissed her forehead. 'No princess, you do not suck as a person. I think you're scared and not used to being out of control.' He pulled back and gave her a searching look. 'But hey, do you want me to go out on a limb and tell you what I think scares you even more?'

Emily wiped her eyes and shrugged.

'What scares you is that somehow, boy genius here made you fall in love with him and you don't have the first clue what to do about it.' He said gently as tears trickled down Emily's face as she nodded and Morgan pulled her into another firm hug. 'I'm happy for you Emily, for both of you. You're what each other have needed for a long time now and when he's all better we're gonna go celebrate.'

After a moments silence, only broken by Emily's quiet sniffles. 'What if he doesn't get better Derek?'

Morgan pulled back and swept a strand of hair from where it stuck to the tears streaking her face. 'His temps not dropped at all?' He asked as he stood up.

Emily scrubbed determinedly at the tears on her cheeks and blinked the fresh ones gathering in her eyes away. 'It dropped by just under one degree but at the last check it had come back up again. The nurse said she was going to speak to Dr Stanley. That was only ten minutes ago.' Emily sighed, her eyes moving to Spencer's face as he swallowed again. 'I think he's thirsty.' She half stood as Spencer's hand began to move sluggishly toward the ice pack resting beneath the sheet on his groin. 'Hey, you need to leave that where it is Spencer. It'll help you cool down.' She said as he tried to shove both the sheet and the pack from his body.

'Ngghh,' Spencer moaned and fought against her hand. 'Cold...' He muttered as his eyes flickered open.

Emily smiled widely with relief. 'I thought you were going to sleep forever.' She said as she stroked his head.

* * *

Spencer moved his head slightly on the pillow and groaned. His head throbbed, worse than he ever remembered it throbbing before, worse than when he and his best friend Jeff had decided to sample the contents of Jeff's dad's liquor cabinet one afternoon. The resulting headache the next day had made him vow never to drink again as he and Jeff spent the whole morning laid on their backs in the long grass just beyond the local park, staring at the perfect blue sky and bemoaning their sorry state.

Moving didn't help the throbbing but he needed to look at the person who was speaking. Sometimes he didn't like to, especially if they were a stranger but his mom told him that it was rude not to look at someone when they were speaking so, battling the lurching pain, he tried to focus.

He blinked and swallowed. It was too hot, his mouth was dry and his tongue was heavy. There was a repetitive beeping sound that was somehow familiar. Where was he? He blinked again and shifted his feet.

The blaze of white hot pain that contracted around his body made him gasp and open his eyes wide.

'Shh, it's okay Spencer, just try to stay still.' The voice said as a cool hand stroked his head.

'Mom?' He blinked again and the figure next to the bed came into view. He knew where he was now. He was in the hospital and his back was injured after that evening in the football field. His mom shouldn't be here, they'd find out about her if she was here! He should get her to leave, tell her he was alright and that she should go home and lower the blinds and lock the doors, but when he blinked again and saw her smiling at him he crumbled and told her everything.

* * *

'Mom?' Spencer said as he stared blearily at Emily.

Emily cast a worried look toward Morgan.

'Spencer it's me, Emily.' She said.

Spencer screwed his eyes shut and crinkled his brow. He tried to stretch his body to relieve the pervasive ache but all that happened was that he re-awakened twin roars of pain in his stomach and back.

'Mom!' He gasped as the sensations strangled the word in his throat. 'It hurts...my back hurts.' He moaned.

'Spencer, you were attacked, do you remember? It was your stomach that was injured.' Emily said.

Spencer nodded his head against the pillows, his eyes tightly closed around the heat and the pain that felt like they were consuming his body. 'The football field...my back.' He mumbled.

'No, you were doing the Hardwick custodial with Hotch. Do you remember?' Emily said firmly.

'My clothes...I need...Uncle Daniel's watch was in my pocket, mom...I need...to find my clothes.' Spencer rambled and he made a weak attempt to push himself upright and drag his feet from the sheet covering his lower half. 'Aagh...oh...' He gasped and stared wide eyed at Emily, tears trickling down his face. 'Did I break my back? It hurts when I move and my foot...mom...my foot feels wet, why does it feel wet?' He moaned and pressed his head hard into the pillows, twisting until his face was half buried and his tears were absorbed by the cloth. 'Make it stop hurting...please...' He begged.

Emily dropped the side of the bed rail and half sat on the mattress next to Spencer, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and cradling his head on her chest. 'That's it Morgan. Find that doctor, now.' She demanded as she rocked her lover gently.

* * *

Morgan was on his fifth repetition of pacing the waiting area floor when the rest of the team arrived back at the hospital. Once look at his face was all they needed to update them.

'What?' Rossi demanded.

'You didn't call...' JJ said worriedly as she checked her cell phone.

'What happened?' Garcia asked, not waiting for Morgan to answer JJ as she stood on her tip toes and pulled Morgan into a hug.

'He's got an infection. His temperature spiked and they've been trying to get it down for the last couple of hours now but it's runnin' wild. The doctor's back and Emily's still in there but I have no idea what's happening.' Morgan sighed. 'He didn't even know who we were.' He said as he pulled Garcia tighter to him and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. 'He didn't even know who we were.' He repeated.

'So what do we do?' JJ demanded helplessly.

The room was silent for a moment and then Hotch spoke. 'Morgan, take Garcia and do a coffee run from the shop outside. Rossi will see if he can get an update from one of the staff and JJ and I will wait here in case Emily comes out. Then we re-group and we wait. For as long as it takes.' Hotch replied as he shrugged out of his suit jacket and smoothed his tie.

* * *

Emily pressed herself further back into the wall as the team of nurses hurried into the room. Dr Stanley had returned earlier, taken one look at Spencer and his temperature readout and promptly set the room into motion. She had sent the nurse to gather her colleagues and had then set about taking Spencer's vitals and scribbling notes onto his chart.

'What's happening?' Morgan had asked.

'Spencer's temperature is still rising and fast. It's moved from high grade to dangerous and we can't wait for the antibiotics to kick in for it to drop. We need to intervene and quickly.' Dr Stanley replied as a team of nurses came into the room. 'We'll do an RSI and gastric lavage.' She said to the nurses, one of whom nodded in response and left the room again. 'And you need to move. You're making him hotter.' She said to Emily where she perched on the bed holding Spencer.

Emily slid away from him, laying his hand gently onto the bed as she stood up. 'I didn't think...he seemed distressed and...'

'Emily it's ok. I'm going to perform something called a gastric lavage.' Dr Stanley said as she walked Emily over to Morgan and the door.

'What? What is that?' Emily asked as she shoved her hair out of her face.

'It's a procedure that will cool him down more quickly that the packs alone can do.' Dr Stanley said.

'Why didn't you do that in the first place?' Morgan said in frustration as he glanced back to look at Spencer.

'Because it's invasive and where possible we'll always try non invasive methods first, but in Spencer's case they're just not working quickly enough.' She moved away from the door as the nurse pushed back into the room with a trolley covered in equipment. 'Gastric lavage introduces iced water directly into the stomach via a nasogastric tube. It should drop his temperature by about point fifteen degrees per minute.'

'A nasogastric...you want to put a tube into his nose and ...wait...what?' Emily stumbled over the words.

'We'll rapidly instill the iced water over a period of sixty seconds and then suction it back out. We'll repeat the process until his core temperature is down to thirty nine degrees. The proximity of the liver, the inferior vena cava, makes it a very effective way of reducing the core temperature.' She talked as she pulled off her white coat and dropped it onto one of the chairs. Rolling her sleeves up she addressed the nurses. 'I want him supine and lose the sheet.' She said to the nursing team as she nodded toward Morgan and Emily.

'But...'Emily tried to speak but felt a wave of panic swell in her throat.

Dr Stanley paused in her preparations for a second. 'Emily, Spencer is unconscious. He won't be aware of what's happening to him and he won't be in any pain. He needs this procedure.' She said firmly. 'You both should wait outside.' She said as one of the nurses pulled the door open.

'We're ready doctor.' One of the other nurses called.

As Morgan left the room Emily started to follow. The weight of the door pressed into her shoulder as she paused and looked back. Dr Stanley and the nurse holding the door had turned back to Spencer who was now laying naked, apart from the catheter tubing crossing his thigh and the heart monitors dotting his chest, and vulnerable in the middle of the bed, surrounded by strangers. As Emily blinked back her tears she knew she couldn't leave him there. She let the door slip closed without her exiting and shrank back into the corner of the room.

The pillows beneath Spencer's head had been discarded along with the sheet and the bed had been pulled away from the wall. Once of the nurses stood with her hands on either side of Spencer's head and held him in position to take the laryngoscope and the ET tube that would secure his airway.

Under the bright glare of the hospital lights Emily could see every plane of her lover's body as it was manipulated by the nursing staff as they first opened his mouth and the doctor made quick work of inserting the tubing into his throat and then as they raised his head and shoulders from the bed in order to position him to feed in the nasogastric tubing.

When another nurse bent his left leg across his right in order to position the thermometer Emily pressed her hands to her face to silence an emerging sob. They shouldn't be touching him like that she wanted to yell. The only woman he should be naked and in bed with was her, the only touches he should feel should be private ones, warm and loving, not cold and clinical. His arms shouldn't be limp and falling from the sides of the bed but warm and circling her body, surprising her with their strength as he pulled her onto him.

She stayed pressed back into the corner of the wall until she saw his fingers twitch against the white mattress cover. The nurses had fixed a bag filled with saline and ice to the Y connector on the end of the gastric tubing and hung it above Spencer's bed. Emily watched as the liquid snaked down the tube as it disappeared into Spencer's nose. She felt her stomach contract as she imagined the bag of icy fluid filling her own belly. Dr Stanley was talking, taking note of Spencer's temperature read outs as the nurses suctioned the water out of his stomach when Emily noticed his fingers curl.

Stepping forward she moved toward the bed and took his hand gently in hers. 'I'm not in your way.' She said as she held Dr Stanley's gaze. 'I know I shouldn't be in here but I'm not in anyone's way.'

Dr Stanley nodded curtly. 'The minute you are you're out. Let's go again people. Another ten ml over sixty seconds please.

As the nurses hung a fresh bag of ice water above Spencer's head and let the flood of liquid fill his nose and stomach, Emily knelt by the bed, cradling his hand, rubbing her thumb down the back of it. 'It's alright. I'm here.' She whispered, her words lost under the steady beeping of the heart monitor and pulse ox. 'I know it's bad but all you have to do is hang on. Please hang on, so you can come back to me.' She begged.

* * *

When the medical team finally streamed out of Reid's room the BAU team were wired on coffee and speculation.

'Dr Stanley.' Hotch called. 'What's happening?'

'Agent Hotchner. You look a little more rested than the last time I saw you.' She said.

'Is Dr Reid alright?' Hotch asked ignoring her comment.

'He's battling an infection right now. His blood work confirmed it and the resulting temperature is giving us a run for our money however we've just managed to get it down to thirty nine degrees. All we need Spencer to do is keep it there.' She said.

'And if he doesn't?' Hotch asked.

'He's fighting Agent Hotchner and that's all we can ask of him. His temperature will start to rise again but we're hoping that our intervention has given his body enough respite for the antibiotics to kick in before it has chance to reach a critical point again. I won't lie, it's going to be a hard night. Hang in there.' She said as she squeezed his shoulder and followed the nursing staff down the hallway.

* * *

The room was eerily quiet once Dr Stanley and her nursing staff had left. The speed at which they had performed the procedure and the invasive nature of it had left Emily feeling shaken and powerless and as the shock of Spencer's situation sank in she found her whole body trembling as she dropped into one of the chairs that had been moved back to the side of his bed.

The nursing staff had given her a bowl of cool water and a cloth to bathe his face and arms with. She wasn't sure if it would actually help him or if it was a placebo for her, something to keep her occupied, but either way she was glad of the small task that she could perform. Wringing the cloth out she leaned forward and gently ran it across Spencer's collar bone and circled the smooth swell of his shoulder before running it down the length of his arm. When she reached his hand she took his elegant fingers and bathed each one lovingly. She repeated the process over and over until the water had warmed and her fingers were wrinkled. Dropping the cloth back in the bowl she leaned forward to untangle the hair that had fallen into his eyes when suddenly he groaned and his face wrinkled into a frown. Emily paused, waiting to see if would wake up but his eyes remained closed and a moment later he settled again. Leaning down she pressed a kiss to his forehead.

'It's ok, just rest. Just sleep now.' She whispered.

Straightening up Emily realised just how thirsty and hungry she felt and just how much she needed the bathroom. Giving Spencer one last look she headed for the door. Logically she knew that Morgan at least would be in the waiting area but was still startled by the presence of the whole team jumping to their feet as she emerged from the IC room.

'We thought we'd give you some time alone. How's he doing?' Morgan asked.

'Cooler...he's a lot cooler now...' Shaking her head she looked at the worried faces of her friends. 'I never want to see anyone I love go through that again.' She said.

'You look exhausted.' JJ said as she took Emily's hand.

'Can I persuade you to go back to the hotel and rest?' Rossi said.

'Not a chance' Emily smiled shakily. 'He has to get through tonight without his fever spiking again. I can't leave him alone for that.'

'You're right. We can leave him alone and we won't.' Hotch said. 'Garcia will take you down to the cafeteria for food and then you can get freshened up in the doctors' lounge.' He held his hand up when Emily was about to argue. 'I cleared it with Reid's doctor and JJ brought your bag. While you're doing that we'll take it in turns to sit with him until you get back.' He ordered.

Emily looked across at Hotch as JJ squeezed her hand. Suddenly she found herself stepping forward and giving him a brief hug. 'Welcome back.' She whispered in his ear.

* * *

Garcia pressed the cloth to Reid's forehead. 'Like this?' She asked.

'Yes, and then run it down his neck but careful of the ice pack.' Emily said wearily.

It was past two in the morning and all night the team had taken it in turns to sit with Spencer. Some like Hotch sat quietly, surprising her when he reached out and held Spencer's hand. Other's like Rossi and JJ had read to him, a difference in literature that had made Emily smile; Kerouac from Rossi and Twilight from JJ. Morgan settled for a one way conversation of gentle teasing declaring that after "watching him lay on his skinny ass for days" he was going to pass him all his consult and paperwork to do for the next month as payback.

Garcia talked. Talked and fussed and smoothed pillows and bathed his brow until Emily could stand it no longer and gently pushed her into one of the chairs and told her to just breathe.

'This is so hard Em, to just watch him struggle and not being able to help him fight.' Garcia said tearfully.

'I know Garcia, I know, but we are helping. Being here, not letting him face this alone, _is_ helping.' Emily said.

Garcia nodded but Emily knew she wasn't convinced. She knew because she herself was far from convinced and it was getting harder to be optimistic.

For the last three hours the team had watched as the red LED display of the monitors attached to Reid's body showed his temperature climb. It wasn't fast but every so often the number would blink and change and with each degree Emily felt her faith crumbling. With each degree she would cling harder to his hand and stare at him more intently as if she could cool him down by sheer will alone.

He started to fuss in his sleep. Little movements accompanied by whimpers and half words that made no sense and Emily and the team had all grown quiet by that point, even Garcia who was now bathing him silently.

Spencer twisted his head into the pillow and cried out, his sweat matted hair sticking to his face and neck. 'Please...' He mumbled. 'Please.'

Emily pulled his hand to her lips and kissed the backs of his fingers. 'It's ok.' She said trying to calm him.

His eyes flickered open but didn't fix on her, instead swimming lazily. 'You shouldn't be here.' He said before closing his eyes again and growing quiet apart from his laboured breathing.

Emily lowered her head to the mattress and allowed herself to cry.

* * *

Hotch was with her when Dr Stanley came back into the room at 4am to take more vitals.

'It's still high?' Emily said, knowing the answer.

Dr Stanley nodded. 'I'll give him another hour, unless he really spikes, and then we'll run another gastric lavage.' She said.

'And if that doesn't work?' Hotch pushed.

'He has to fight this off himself. We can only cool him down so many times and after that it's up to him and the antibiotics. I'm sorry.' Dr Stanley said as she pressed her hand onto Emily's shoulder. 'Page the nursing staff if you need me before then.' She said.

Emily sat heavily back in her chair and took Spencer's hand. His fingers were hot and dry, making her own clammy hands even more uncomfortable. 'You know I really don't want to watch them do those things to you again baby, please, please...just fight.' She whispered as she felt her body sag into the chair and her head spin.

The next thing she knew Hotch was speaking but his voice was coming from far away and Morgan was leaning over her.

'When did she last sleep?' Hitch was saying.

'A little last night. But only a couple of hours in the waiting room chairs.' Morgan said as he pushed a cup of water toward her. She was still in Spencer's room but was laying on the couch under the window. Blinking she tried to sit up.

'Whoa. Hold on princess. You juts about passed out a moment ago.' Morgan said as he held the cup for her to drink.

'Spencer...' She started.

'Spencer is right where you left him and he will still be there when you have slept some.' Morgan said firmly.

'No I...'

'Prentiss you need sleep. You;re no use to Reid like this. Lay down and we will wake you if anything happens.

Emily was about to protest when a thick blanket was laid over her and Hotch's firm hand pressed her shoulders back into the couch. The last thing she saw was everyone gatherd around Spencer's bed.

* * *

The next thing Emily saw was strips of sunlight across the linoleum floor as they slipped in through the slatted blind. She blinked and sat up, her mouth dry and cottony. How long had she slept for she wondered and what was that? Was that Rossi? Rossi reading Twilight?

The whole team were still in the room, asleep, dotted around on chairs dragged in from the waiting area and in Morgan's case sat on the floor, leaned against the wall, fast asleep.

Tentatively she pushed the blanket from her legs and stood up almost afraid of what she might see when she approached the bed.

'It's gone down.' Rossi said as he snapped the book closed. 'Better than this trash has gone down with me I can promise you that.'

'It's...really?' Emily pushed past Rossi and took in the sight of Spencer sleeping peacefully and the monitor next to his bed reading a steady thirty eight degrees.

'It's gone down!' She exclaimed to Rossi, a huge smile breaking across her face for the first time in days.

'His fever broke at a little before 5am. Just as that doctor was about to perform another one of those Victorian looking procedures. Great sense of timing the kid has, huh.' He smiled as Emily brushed a couple from stray tears from her face. 'He's been sleeping since then. No dreaming, no talking just good old fashioned healing sleep.'

Emily nodded and grinned and cried as Rossi pulled her into a hug.

**CMCM**


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

**Thanks to all for your continued reviews, alerts and favourites.**

**A/N - Nebula2, thank you for your kind and supportive review. I know you said slow and steady wins the race but I doubt you meant this slow.**

**Chapter Twenty Six**

**The Consultant**

When Spencer woke up his body felt heavy. Not unpleasantly so, but the comforting heaviness of a deep sleep and retreating sickness.

He remembered feeling nauseous and his skin burning. He remembered his head hurting and the irrational fear that his brains were going to split his skull in two. He remembered dreaming about his mom, feeling her cool hand on his brow, hearing her voice and how it both comforted and panicked him.

Now though he felt rested. With his eyes closed he was aware of the sounds and sensations that surrounded him. The sheet covering him felt intensely soft, as if all the tiny hairs on his skin were amplifying its touch. It was then that he realised that he was naked beneath the sheet. His fingers curled involuntarily and he searched for the covering and tried to pull it further up his body. He stopped when he felt a hand cover his and warm lips pressing against his mouth.

'You're awake.' Emily murmured.

Spencer opened his eyes and blinked to clear his vision. Emily was leaning over him. She looked tired. Her eyes were red and her skin was scrubbed free of makeup but Spencer thought that she looked more beautiful than any woman he had ever seen before.

'Em...' Spencer started to speak and then winced and swallowed as the pain in his throat roared into life. 'Oh...' He gasped as his eyes started to water.

'Slow down. You had a tube down your throat. You'll be really sore for a while, but that's ok, you don't need to speak, just listen.' Emily said as she stroked his hair lovingly. 'You had an infection and your fever spiked. They tried to bring it down with ice packs but ultimately they had to do a gastric lavage. Do you understand?'

Spencer nodded and swallowed again, closing his eyes against the pain in his throat.

'Your throat and stomach will be sore for a while but it worked. The fever's down and the antibiotics have started to clear the infection.' Emily reached for a cup of ice chips, dug in with the spoon and held one to his lips.

Spencer thought it tasted like heaven.

'Thank you.' He whispered.

'That's ok. You can have more if you want.' Emily said as she reached back for the cup.

Spencer sluggishly reached for her hand to stop her. 'No...' he shook his head, 'thank you for not leaving me.'

Emily closed her eyes and pulled his hand up to her lips, pressing a firm kiss to the back of his fingers.

'Where else was I going to go?' She said. 'Besides I wasn't alone, everyone else was with me.'

Spencer glanced around the room.

'They're in the waiting area. Since you started to respond we've been taking it in turns to sit with you and catch some sleep at the hotel.' She said.

Spencer cleared his throat again and accepted another chip of ice. 'How long have I been out?' He rasped his voice a little stronger.

'Two days.' Emily said.

Spencer's brow shot up. 'Two days? They should have gone home. What about Jack, and Morgan needs to be back for his tenants and Rossi...' He rasped.

Emily leaned forward in her chair and made a show of thinking over what he had said. 'Yeah, I guess you're right. We all have better things to do than sit around and make sure you're not going to die.'

'That's not...' Spencer tried to reply.

'Sure it's not what you meant.' She said as she brushed his hair away from his eyes. 'Do you really think any of those guys out there would leave their friend alone when he's hurt? Do you really think _I_ would leave you alone when you're hurt?' She said as she leaned over to kiss him again.

The distinctly non hospital appropriate kiss made him forget to keep still. He tried to twist his body into hers and ended up pulling back sharply with a hiss as his spine flared into a spiteful flash of pain. When he opened his eyes again Emily was pressing the call button for the nurse.

'I'm fine it's...' Spencer stopped as Emily fixed him with a frustrated glare.

'Stop right there.' She snapped. 'Before the twelve year old boy in you starts running around making excuses, just stop. I know you're in pain and I know it isn't just your stomach wound. You're already scheduled for an MRI this afternoon and as soon as the nurse gets here and sees that you're awake she's going to page Dr Stanley and we're going to talk about your back.'

'My injury was to my stomach not my back!' He argued. 'I don't need any more doctors poking around and saying the same thing.'

'Reid, a blind man could see that you are in pain, you only managed to half hide it before the fever and when you weren't lucid you admitted to it. You have to let the doctor take a look.' She argued.

'Emily, I don't need an MRI and you had no right to speak about this with my physician.' Reid tried to push himself up the bed but residual weakness from the fever and the pain in his back stopped him with a groan. 'Tell the doctor I don't want it.' Reid said querulously.

'I can't.' Emily said, her chin lifting defiantly.

'Then I will.' Reid said as he squeezed his eyes shut and tightened his fingers in the sheet.

The feel of her fingers pulling his free from the sheet made him open his eyes. She was standing now with a look on her face that he had never seen before. She looked ferocious.

'I can't.' She said as she blinked away a stray tear and blotted her face with the cuff of her sweater. 'I can't because I refuse to watch the man I'm in love with in pain anymore.' She said as Reid stared up at her.

Suddenly she sat heavily on the edge of the bed and laid her hand on his chest.

'That night, when Hotch called and you left, I meant to tell you then and I didn't and I nearly lost you so I'm not going to hide it or deny it or be scared of saying it any more. I'm in love with you Dr Spencer Reid. I'm in love with you and even if you aren't in love with me it doesn't matter, I just... I need you to know and I need you to understand that this is the reason I can't stand by and watch you hurting so don't...so don't make me. I know I don't understand what it's like for you but don't make me watch you suffer Spencer, please.'

The silence of the room was overwhelming as Spencer looked away from her. After a moment he cleared his aching throat and spoke.

'I...they won't fix it, you know that don't you, and I can't...the thought of trying...no, the thoughtof_ hoping _for a better outcome and going through all that again for nothing...I... I can't be fixed Emily, I can't be made _normal_ however much you want or need me to be.' He said.

Emily pulled her hand away from his and stood up. 'I don't care about _normal _Spencer; I don't even know what normal is! I don't _care_ if you use a cane or a wheelchair but I care that you _hurt_. Every day I watch you and I can see how much pain you're in, even on good days, I can see you trying to hide it and it hurts, in here!' She grabbed his hand and pulled it to her chest just above her heart. 'If there is anything that can be done to alleviate some of that pain then I want to try it and if that's selfish or me wanting to change you then yes, I'm selfish and yes, I want you to change.' She took a deep breath as she tried to squash down the anger burning in the stomach.

Spencer set his jaw and looked at her defiantly.

Emily let out the breath she was holding. 'But you don't care do you, because Dr Reid always knows better. For all your logic and understanding you're going to ignore the situation and push away anyone who tries to get you to act like the goddamn genius you are the one time you really need to!' Emily grabbed her purse from the floor and headed for the door. 'MRI's scheduled for three O'clock. Have it, don't have it. It's your choice.' She flung the door open and stepped out.

* * *

'So, what did you do?' Morgan asked as Rossi set the cup of take out coffee on to Reid's table.

Reid looked away from them but couldn't stop his eyes sliding hungrily back to the coffee cup.

'I would like to say that my amazing profiling skills alerted me to you having messed up but really kiddo, when ALL the women in one area gather around another and spirit her away for a conference it's usually to talk about the monumental mess up a man has made.' Rossi said. 'So, to repeat Morgan's question, what did you do?'

'Can I have the coffee, please?' Reid said petulantly.

Morgan sighed. 'Let him have it Rossi. When he's part way through we'll take it offa him and make him tell us.'

Reid scowled and lifted his head as much as he could to take a small sip. Sighing he proffered the cup back to Morgan and laid his head back down. 'Thank you!' He said.

'So Emily's upset and you're not talking. Is it because she spoke with the doctor about your back injury?' Rossi said.

'She doesn't understand.' Reid said.

'To be honest kid, neither do I.' Morgan replied. 'But can you talk it through with us because she was really upset out there.'

'I don't know why! It doesn't have to affect her!' Reid cried.

'It doesn't have to affect her?' Rossi sighed. 'Son, how can it not affect her? She's in love with you.'

Reid grabbed at Morgan's hand for the coffee again as he smiled sarcastically. 'Sure Rossi, she's in love with me. We've been dating for a short period of time how can she possibly...' Reid stopped mid sentence.

'What, Reid, man are you alright?' Morgan pulled the cup back as Reid's face paled.

"_**That night, when Hotch called and you left, I meant to tell you then and I didn't and I nearly lost you so I'm not going to hide it or deny it or be scared of saying it any more. I'm in love with you Dr Spencer Reid. I'm in love with you and even if you aren't in love with me it doesn't matter."**_

When he finished repeating what Emily had said earlier he stared up at his friends faces, his eyes wide and his mouth open in a surprised little 'O'.

'There ya' go.' Rossi quipped as he handed the coffee back to him.

* * *

Emily sat at the small cafeteria table and continued to shred the side of the take out coffee cup. 'He's the stupidest person I ever met!' She stated.

'I kinda' doubt that.' Garcia said quietly, snapping her mouth shut when Emily stared at her angrily.

'I told him how I felt and nothing, _nothing!_' She said.

JJ leaned across the table and pulled her hand into hers. 'He's scared Emily. He's facing something he doesn't want to think about but when his super brain re-sets itself he'll remember what you said and he'll say all the right things back.'

'You can't know that!' Emily said.

'I know that under pressure a lot can get said but a lot more can be left unsaid.' She said softly.

'Rossi.' Garcia said as she nodded toward the man heading to their table. 'Hey, is everything ok?' She asked.

'Reid's fine.' He replied. 'They've just taken him down for the MRI.' He said.

Emily stopped shredding and looked up. 'He agreed to the test?'

'He did and he asked if you could be in his room when he gets back. He said he needs you there when he speaks with the doctor.' He said as he smiled and held his hand out toward Emily. 'Come on bella, let's get this done.'

* * *

When Spencer was wheeled back into his room his face was white and he kept his eyes tightly shut until the brakes were applied to the bed.

'Do you need an emesis basin Spencer?' Dr Stanley asked.

He shook his head and swallowed convulsively.

'How's the pain?' Dr Stanley asked.

Spencer nodded. 'It'll pass.' He said tightly. 'It usually does.'

'He takes Morphine when it's particularly bad.' Emily said as she shifted against the window ledge where she was leaning.

Spencer opened his eyes when he heard her voice and couldn't help the half sob that came from his throat.

'I can give you some now.' Dr Stanley offered.

Spencer shook his head.

'Alright, just press the nurse's button if you need something. I'll be back shortly with the MRI results and we can talk then. Try to get some rest.' Dr Stanley said as she left the room.

'You _could_ take the pain killers, you know, but heaven forbid that you actually rely on something.' Emily said her voice tight.

Reid blinked and fought the urge to remain silent. He glanced over at Emily and his chest constricted at the hurt look she was trying to hide. 'I know I could take them.' He said quietly. The silence between them stretched for a few moments until he spoke again. 'After it first happened, when they...when the football team did what they did ...I was in more pain that I knew could even be possible and because I was a minor the hospital just gave me whatever drugs they thought I should have and I had no control.'

'You were just a little boy Spencer...' Emily started.

Reid waved his hand dismissively. 'That's not it. They frighten me, Emily.'

'They frighten you?' Emily asked.

'When my father left and my mom got worse I worked really hard to be in control of everything and I was! I did it all, took care of my mom, looked after the house and the bills and myself but to do that I had to _think _all the time. When I was in the hospital full of drugs I was panicked at how out of control I felt and how I _couldn't_ think, but at the same time I didn't _care.' _He took a deep breath and fixed his eyes on the ceiling. 'It was as if something woke up inside of me and it was greedy for this feeling of nothingness. I wanted it all the time, an eleven year old boy and I _wanted this drug_ Emily.' He stopped and looked at her. 'The feeling terrified me and ever since I've been really careful about how much I allow myself to take. I'd rather have the pain than the temptation.'

She gave him a quick nod and wiped at her eyes. 'You were a little boy.' Emily repeated. 'One, whom I could imagine, needed a break. Did you talk to anyone?' She asked.

Reid stared at her. 'You.' Suddenly he held his hand out toward her. 'I'm really sorry Emily, _really_ sorry for not hearing what you were saying earlier. I didn't even realise that you'd said you...that you...' He let his hand drop and stared up at the ceiling.

'That I said I love you?' She said as she took his hand. 'Well I did say it and yes you did behave like an ass.' She gave him a watery smile.

'I know, that's why I went.' He replied.

Emily frowned. 'Went...?

'You'd left and Morgan and Rossi came in to grill me on what I'd done wrong and Rossi said that you were in love with me and that's when it came back...what you said, it came back to me but by then you'd left and I didn't know if Morgan would be able to persuade you to come back so I though _what would show Emily that I feel the same, what would prove it, more than saying it_, so...I... I went...for the MRI, I told Dr Stanley how much pain I was in and I went for the test.'

'And how was it?' Emily asked as she sat on the edge of the bed and pulled his hand into her lap.

'Loud. Painful.' He said with a weak smile.

Emily pulled his fingers to her lips and kissed them. 'Thank you.' She whispered.

Reid pulled her hand back and kissed it in return. 'I'm scared Emily.'

'I know.' She replied.

* * *

'A full house I see.' Dr Stanley said when she returned to find the whole team in Reid's room.

'We've been doing our duty as friends and making him laugh.' Garcia said proudly.

'That's great, now if you could just go and work that magic on a couple of my other patients...' Dr Stanley smiled as she manoeuvred the screen she'd wheeled in to sit by Reid's bed.

'I'm not sure they'd be strong enough for a dose of Garcia doc.' Morgan said, dodging back as Garcia smacked at his arm playfully.

'You have the MRI scans?' Reid asked, nodding his head toward the monitor.

'Yes'. Dr Stanley said. 'If we can go though them in private...'

'Can they stay?' Reid asked.

'Ah, it's a pretty full room Spence.' JJ said as she grabbed her purse. 'Why don't we go get some fresh coffee and you can fill us in when we get back?' She said nodding toward Hotch and Garcia.

Reid nodded and ran his fingers through his hair.

'We'll be back soon.' JJ said as she pressed a kiss to his forehead.

* * *

The screen came to life displaying a perfect sectional view of Reid's lower spine. The image wasn't clear for Emily, Morgan or Rossi to translate but Spencer had seen it before and his eidetic memory put old and new together and spotted the deterioration easily.

'Your original injury was stabilised using Kyphoplasty?' Dr Stanley said as she flicked through the notes in her hand.

'Yes.' Reid said.

'And it was successful?' She asked.

'Yes.' Reid replied.

'But your doctors did advise that it could degrade over time?'

'They did and it has.' Reid sighed. 'The pain I experience has been getting more frequent since the age of twenty. It's not bad...' Reid glanced at Morgan as he made an incredulous noise. 'It's _not_ bad.' He repeated.

'What's kyphoplasty?' Emily asked the doctor.

'It's a procedure used to stabilise damaged vertebrae. A biopsy needle is inserted into the fractured or collapsed area and a small balloon is inflated to create a void. Cement is then inserted into the void. In some cases it works well, in others less so.' Dr Stanley said as she turned her attention back to Reid. 'The original procedure has started to degrade and I suspect the blow you received to your back when you were attacked worsened the situation. '

'Can you fix it?' Rossi asked.

'The original damage, not completely, but we do have a couple of options that'll help you get back on your feet.' Dr Stanley replied as she smiled at Spencer.

'Options?' Emily said.

'We can go in, clean up the area.' The doctor pointed to the screen and a cluster of small white shards framing one of the lower vertebrae of Reid's spine. 'Get rid of these fractured slivers of bone, recreate the void and fill it with more cement.'

Spencer shoved his hand through his hair and looked away from the screen. 'When can you carry out the procedure?' He asked.

'I thought you said there were options, plural?' Rossi said.

'Yeah, this Kyphoplasty hasn't done such a great job so far, so why opt for it again?' Morgan added.

'Well the other option is to use pedicle screws.' Dr Stanley started.

'What?' Emily said.

'Spinal fusion.' Spencer said. 'I want the Kyphoplasty.' He finished bluntly.

'Wait, would this fusion be more successful in alleviating the pain he's been experiencing?' Emily asked.

'It's definitely the better option and it might even give better overall mobility and certainly a long term reduction in pain. We'd use a bone graft to fuse the damaged vertebrae to the neighbouring vertebrae and support it with pedicle screws.' Dr Stanley said. 'The screws are literally that, screws that fix the two vertebrae together to inhibit movement which allows the bone graft to grow and create the fusion. Sometimes the screws are removed once the graft takes, but it's more usual to leave them in place. Spencer, looking at your history, how the Kyphoplasty has worked for you so far, and your age I'd recommend the spinal fusion.' Dr Stanley said.

'My HMO won't cover it.' Reid said flatly. 'When can you do the Kyphoplasty?' He asked.

'Hold on,' Morgan interrupted, 'Reid, you were injured in the line of duty. The bureau should cover this, shouldn't they?' He looked at Rossi.

Emily shrugged. 'I would have thought so. I'll speak to Hotch.'

'Wait,' Reid began.

'Garcia'll be able to find out.' Morgan said as he flipped his cell open and pushed his way out of the room.

Emily made to follow him but Rossi's hand on her wrist as she passed him made her stop. When she looked at him he nodded toward Reid. He was laid back on the pillows his hand pressed over his eyes.

'Spencer? Are you ok?' She asked.

'I think I should speak with Spencer alone.' Dr Stanley said as she gestured Rossi out of the room.

'Do you want me to wait outside?' Emily asked Reid.

Spencer shook his head but didn't move the hand covering his eyes.

'I'm sorry. We were rushing you. I'll tell Morgan not to call Garcia...' Emily said.

'Can you tell me why you're upset Spencer? Dr Stanley asked.

'I'm not upset, I...' Reid took a deep breath and scrubbed at his eyes. 'I'm not upset I just need...I just need a minute to think!'

Dr Stanley sat on the edge of Reid's bed and closed his file. 'What do you need to know?' She asked.

'I don't need to know anything,' Reid exclaimed, 'I know all about both procedures I just...'He sighed and closed his eyes.

'The stabilisation would be the best way to go but either procedure is viable and if your HMO isn't an obstacle then you simply need to decide which route you want to go down.' Dr Stanley said. 'If you have any questions just have the nursing staff page me, otherwise I'll come back tomorrow and we'll talk about what you've decided then. Get some rest.' She patted his leg gently and left.

Emily waited for the door to close fully before sitting on the bed and taking one of Spencer's hands in her own. 'Tell me.' She said.

He shook his head to avoid her gaze. 'There's nothing to tell.'

Emily moved her hand to cup his chin and bring his eyes back to hers. She raised her eyebrows and stared at him. '_Tell_ me.'

'I don't want to do anything.' He whispered.

'You can't stay like this Reid.' Emily said.

'I know, I know...I don't mean I _won't _do anything I just don't _want_ to, I don't want to be back in this position again...you wouldn't understand.'

'So tell me, make me understand.' She said.

'I resent it.' He said suddenly. 'Every time something happens with my back I feel... interrupted!'

'Interrupted?' Emily said.

'Yes! I... I get everything under control and I know what I'm doing and what my life is and then something happens and I'm either back in the hospital or taking a week's leave so I can stay in bed swimming in Morphine and it's not fair!' He snapped.

'It's not fair?' Emily repeated.

'That's right. It's not fair, any of it, and every time something sets me back it gets harder and harder to ignore it and pretend I'm alright.' He shouted.

Emily leaned forward and gently pulled him into her arms, holding him as he cried.

'I'm sorry.' He sniffed into her shoulder.

'I'm glad.' Emily replied. 'I'm glad that you've finally gotten angry, it's more understandable than you fatalistically accepting whatever happens, what has happened! I'm glad because now you're angry you can fight, you can do something about it.'

Spencer nodded. 'I will.'

* * *

Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose and fought the urge to throw his cell phone against the sidewalk. 'You're arguing the difference between a single paragraph within the same sets of paperwork. If you wanted to do something you could.' He said tersely.

'Agent Hotchner this is out of my control and I resent your inference that I'm indifferent to Dr Reid's plight. I do have feelings.' Strauss said.

'The bureau has the resource to fund this. It shouldn't even require debate. A member of our team has been grievously injured pursuing his line of work. We should be doing all we can to make this right.' Hotch said.

'Aaron, this isn't a lifetime movie, it's reality and what you're trying to dig into is the public purse. It's not a bottomless pit. The standard HMO applies.'

Hotch clutched the phone tightly as he heard the line go dead.

'I take it from the look on your face that you didn't hear what you wanted to hear?' Rossi stepped out of the hospital doorway and squeezed Hotch's shoulder, feeling the tension radiating from his friend. 'Can you please try to remember that you took a blow to the head only a couple of days ago? You look like hell.'

'I'm sure I feel better than Reid.' Hotch said.

'What happened?' Rossi asked.

'Morgan had Garcia run the hospital fees against Reid's Bureau HMO package.' Hotch said.

'It doesn't cover what he needs?' Rossi asked.

'It might get him a fruit cup.' Hotch replied dryly.

'And Strauss couldn't help?' Rossi said.

'Wouldn't.' Hotch replied.

'Her reach isn't as far as you might think Hotch. She can only go so far.' Rossi said.

'So what? Reid doesn't get the treatment he needs and we all sit back and just accept it?' Hotch said. 'This job that we do Dave, it takes everything we have and we can't even get decent medical?'

'The Man doesn't care Aaron.' Rossi called as Hotch shoved his cell into his pocket and strode back into the hospital. 'But I do.' He said to himself as he pulled out his own cell phone and placed a call to an old friend.

**CMCM**


	27. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

**Thank you sincerely for all alerts, faves and reviews and your ongoing support.**

**Chapter Twenty Seven**

**The Consultant**

Dr Francis Giordano breathed deeply and focused on the dot on the fairway that was his golf ball. He whistled through his teeth and smiled. _Days like this just get better and better,_ he thought.

'Stop smiling you smug son of a bitch.' His opponent snapped at him.

'Really Father, is that any way to speak to a member of your congregation?' He laughed as his old friend messed up his shot and swore quietly under his breath.

'When the congregation member is you, yes.' Father Alessi laughed.

'Watch and weep.' Francis said as he teed up a second shot which would have been perfect if his cell phone hadn't rung and put him off.

'This better be a life or death emergency, 'cause I just missed my shot.' He snapped into the handset.

'Is this little Frankie Giordano?' David Rossi's voice carried into Frankie's ear.

'Ahh hell, so much for my good day.' Frankie laughed. 'What do you want Davie?'

'What? A guy can't call his best friend unscheduled?' Rossi asked.

'When that best friend is you, no.' Frankie responded. 'Hold on...Father Alessi wants to know when you last went to confession?'

'Low blow Frankie. Tell him I'll go to confession when he confesses to Momma Rossi that it was him smoking pot in my room before prom.'

Frankie laughed. 'Yeah, he says enjoy waiting for absolution. So...?'

'I need to call in that favour.' Rossi said.

'Again! You saved my life _once_ and yet I've lost count of these return favours, Davie...'

'I sure did save your scrawny Italian ass and your momma, if I remember correctly said, and I quote, "_this man, Francis Joseph Giordano is an angel, an angel and you had better spend the rest of your life repaying him_".' Rossi scolded gently.

Frankie sighed. 'What do you need?'

'You still work in that fancy clinic of yours between tee times?' Rossi asked.

'I happen to work in that fancy clinic _a lot_.' Frankie answered.

'Would you take a look at a patient for me?' Rossi asked.

'A patient?' Frankie asked.

'Yeah, this kid I know. He needs surgery, spinal fusion or something but his HMO is in the toilet. He's...he could use a break and I'm prepared to pay for it but if I do I want to know I'm getting the best.' Rossi said.

'The best who you happen to know will give you cut rate when you lean on him?' Frankie asked. 'This kid must have made quite an impression on you.'

'He's just a kid I know Frankie.' Rossi said. 'Let's not start reading any hidden meanings into things.'

'Sure. Get his medical files to me and I'll see what I can do.' Frankie said.

'Thanks.' Rossi said.

'You know Davie one day you'll call me and ask for a favour that actually _is_ for _you_ and then I'll be off the hook.' Frankie said warmly.

'One day.' Rossi replied.

* * *

'So, what do you want to do?' Emily asked as she moved Spencer's pillows in a bid to make him comfortable.

Catching her wrist he stopped her movements. 'I want to go to sleep.' He said, giving her a small smile.

'You know what I meant.' She said.

'I know. I'd just like to stop thinking about everything for a while. I wish...I wish we were back in Quantico. I wish we'd just been out on a date, Lo Squalo maybe or the museum, and were so tired that we'd fallen straight in to bed and I wish we were lying next to each other, talking, holding each other and that I could smell the perfume in your hair and not the overriding smell of antiseptic.' He said as he wrinkled his nose.

'You want it to be over, I get that.' She paused and flashed him a sly smile. 'You think it's against regulations for me to squeeze into bed with you now?'

'Yes.' He said flatly. 'And I think it would hurt also.' He smiled and patted the mattress next to him. 'But I'm willing to risk the pain.'

'You're a real trooper.' She laughed.

She toed off her boots and proceeded to carefully lay by his side. Leaning her head on her hand she moved forward and pressed a kiss to his lips. 'I miss sleeping with you too.' She said. 'Actually I miss sleeping.' She teased.

'I'm sorry.' He whispered against her mouth as she kissed him again.

'S'not true.' She breathed against his lips. 'I miss falling asleep with my head resting on your chest. I miss waking up with your hand tangled in my hair. I miss how you hold me. I miss you making love to me.' She whispered.' And yes, I want all this to be over too.' She moved her hand beneath the sheet and caressed his body.

He smiled lazily at her, a mixture of the drugs and pleasure, until his hips jerked reflexively and he hissed in pain.

'Oh, I am so sorry!' Emily gasped as she pulled back.

'That was definitely against hospital rules.' He joked as he grit his teeth.

'Sorry.' Emily pressed a kiss to his forehead and slid off the bed. 'Do you still want to sleep? I can lower the light, I'll stay right here.'

'I'm going to request the surgery Emily, the fusion, if the HMO checks out. I'm going to do it.' He said, stopping Emily in her tracks.

'Because _you_ want it, not because you think it's what everyone else thinks you should do?' Emily asked.

Reid paused and frowned. 'No, actually it's because I _don't_ want it! I want the comfort of knowing exactly what I'm going to experience, of what will happen after the surgery and for that I want to opt for the kyphoplasty but I know it's not the best choice anymore. It's not the best choice for us Emily, and I want there to be an _us _for as long as possible.'

Leaning over him she kissed him again, the closeness allowing her to hear the hitch in his breathing.

'Is the pain worse?' She asked.

He shook his head. 'I can usually cope with it for a certain length of time. I just think I'm reaching my limit.' He tried smiling but couldn't quite pull it off.

'Maybe it's time to rely on something for once. Let me call the nurse.' She said as she reached for the call button.

* * *

Hotch stood, his arms folded across his chest, as he stared at his co-workers. The intensity of his expression and tightness of his jaw made Garcia's teeth ache just looking at him.

'You're sure about this?' Hotch asked Rossi who was lounging in one of the horrible plastic cafeteria chairs and nursing another bad coffee.

'You ever known me say something I didn't mean? Look Hotch I have the right contacts and I have the pretty green pieces of paper to do this with. It's not a big deal unless we turn it into one, right kitten?' Rossi levelled his gaze a Garcia as she squirmed in her chair.

'I want to agree I really do but if you lie to him like this he'll be mad and I don't ...I don't think it's right to lie to him.' She finished weakly.

'Garcia he needs this but we can't do it without you on board. Morgan and Emily both know that you've checked out the Bureau policy. They'll come to you for an answer about the HMO. Reid won't do this if he thinks its charity.' Hotch said.

Rossi set his cup down. 'Look, it's pretty simple. He has the chance at a better life, a less painful life, a life _we_ can give to him, and if he finds out later what we did and he never speaks to us again, then I for one will be happy to play those odds if the payoff is to see him looking healthy every day.' He said.

Garcia stared helplessly as Hotch. 'They're profilers, they'll be able to tell that I'm lying, I'm not good at lying!'

'Then let us do the talking princess, let us do the talking.' Rossi said.

* * *

Emily hugged Morgan so hard he thought his ribs were going to crack. He could feel the neck of his shirt getting wet and the swell of Emily's chest as she hid a torrent of emotion behind her hair and his shoulder.

'I can't believe it checked out. I was waiting for Garcia to come back and say he didn't qualify for some reason but...' She sniffed loudly and laughed. 'I'm happy; I am Morgan I just...' She sniffed and laughed again.

'I know. I was expecting a few more obstacles with the HMO as well. Sometimes it's a little too much when things go right for once. I think maybe we're all just getting too used to bad outcomes.' He smiled and squeezed her back.

Pulling away Emily dried her face and pulled her hair back into a low pony, snagging it in the thin black band she kept around her wrist.

'So what happens now?' She asked as she turned back to the crowded waiting area.

'We prep him for the transfer back to DC.' Dr Stanley smiled.

'It's not something you can do here?' Emily asked her. 'It's just... he trusts you and the flight back might be too ...'

'He'll get great care in DC, Princess.' Rossi said.

'And he'll be close when he does his PT and you know, we can all be around him, to help and if you get called on cases then I can help more...and, well, you know.' Garcia said.

'Don't worry about the transfer Agent Prentiss. The level of pain medication he's on now will keep him comfortable and the medEvac staff are good at what they do. He'll hardly notice the ride.' She smiled. 'I'll have my staff liaise with the medical centre in DC and if they have the resource to take him straight away I'm happy from a medical stand point for him to be transferred as early as tomorrow.'

'They have the resource and they can be ready with the flight as soon as he is.' Hotch said.

'Then I'll set everything in motion.' Dr Stanley said. 'Oh, I just have one condition,' she said as she turned back to them, 'I'd like if you let me know how the surgery goes.'

'Of course.' Rossi said as he shook the doctor's hand.

* * *

The six hours of sleep Emily had back in the hotel that night made her feel like a whole new person, which was a good thing because she needed all of her strength for Spencer's transfer from the hospital to the clinic in DC.

She never thought she'd be a strong advocate of pain medication but seeing Spencer's face turn white and hearing him gasp a pained _'wait!'_ as the hospital staff fitted him with a heavy duty back brace for the journey made a thin sheen of sweat prickle across her skin as though she were the one in pain. During that difficult half hour she gave a quick thanks to god or whomever for morphine and all its derivatives more than once.

She could understand why he didn't like taking the meds. Just one quick look into his eyes and she could see he was snowed and she could also see that he hated it.

'Where's Morgan?' He slurred as the medEvac staff settled him on the gurney and secured the straps across his chest, waist and legs.

'The airport. He and the others are taking the jet back home.' She said as she stroked his hair.

'We couldn't fly?' He mumbled, his eyelids drooping.

'We are flying but you get the special treatment.' He looked at her questioningly. 'MedEvac flight.' She said. 'The BAU jet's not equipped; Rossi talked you through the transfer plans earlier remember?' She looked worriedly at Dr Stanley.

'Don't worry. It's a combination of the meds and little to no sleep last night.' She said.

'Bad night.' Spencer muttered.

'You couldn't sleep?' Emily asked him. 'Why didn't you ask the nursing staff to call me? I would have been here.'

'You missed sleep, remember?' He smiled lazily up at her.

'That you remember!?' She huffed. 'You should have gotten them to call.'

'Couldn't stop thinking, that's all, nothing to worry about.' He said. 'Wish we could take the jet with everyone else though.'

'Hey, what's wrong with spending an hour on a flight with me? You're not the best travelling companion yourself you know.' She joked gently.

'I have a library worth of medical statistics in my head if you want to pass the time or I can tell you all I know about the history of medEvac.' He said, smiling.

'Great. It's not too late for me to call Morgan back and switch you know.' She said as the paramedics started to move the gurney.

'Good luck Spencer.' Dr Stanley said warmly.

Emily stopped and turned back to the doctor. 'Thank you, for everything.' She said.

* * *

The pressure change encountered during takeoff made Spencer moan in pain. The flight nurse took his readings and upped his meds slightly before moving back and motioning for Emily to come sit by him.

'He's doing ok.' She reassured Emily. 'We'll be in DC in a little under an hour, just try to get him to relax, get some sleep if he can.'

'Hey, this is a pretty impressive plane, huh?' Emily said as she took the seat next to the gurney.

''M slummin' it. My other plane's a jet.' He joked weakly.

She smiled and nodded. 'I know. Hey, as the Cristal's not chilled on this flight do you want a sip of water?' She asked.

'Not thirsty.' He said. 'Although even a short flight can deplete the body's hydration levels.'

'I thought you weren't going to start with the statistics.' She said as she held out a beaker and straw to his lips.

'That wasn't a statistic.' He coughed a little and moved away from the straw. 'I could tell you that the first medEvac transport was military and was completed in 1926. The first civilian transport was completed in 1928.'

Emily smiled and took his hand in hers, gently stroking his long fingers. 'How are you feeling?'

'In pain. Tired.' He replied.

'I know but things will be better soon.' She replied.

'That's what I'm worried about.' He said.

'That you'll be better?'

'That you're so convinced that I will be. Emily this won't cure everything, you know that, right?'

'Spencer, stop. I just want you to feel well.' She answered.

'I will if you're with me.' He murmured as he fell asleep.

* * *

'Agent Hotchner.' Erin Strauss folded her arms and pushed herself away from Hotch's desk as he entered his office.

'Ma'am.' His eyes narrowed as he put his go bag down next to the door and hung his crumpled jacket on the hook above it. 'Can I help you with something?'

'An update on Dr Reid's condition would be good.' She replied.

'I didn't think it was on your agenda, but if you want a medical update then I'm sure his doctor will file a report to human resources.'

'Don't be an ass Aaron. It really doesn't suit you. I merely wanted to see how he was doing.'

'The Bureau cares?' Aaron said.

'Levels of medical insurance are not down to me Aaron, you know that.' She cleared her throat. 'I like Dr Reid, despite Jason Gideon's misleading appraisal of him, and I think he brings something unique to your team. It would be a great loss of he were to feel unable to continue in his role.' She stepped toward the door. 'Your team is on stand down for the rest of the week. Tell them to get some rest. I expect to see them all back on Monday morning.' She turned to leave. 'I'll convey my sympathies to Dr Reid myself when I see him.'

* * *

Reid was vomiting hard into an emesis basin as Emily rubbed his shoulders.

'Try to relax Mr Reid.' The nurse said.

'It's doctor.' Morgan said from the doorway. 'You ok kid?' He moved into the private hospital room, shooting Prentiss a worried look.

'Why aren't you at the BAU?' Emily asked as she switched out the emesis basin she was holding for a fresh one.

'Strauss gave us the rest of the week. What's wrong?' He asked.

'Nothing.' Reid gasped as he pushed the basin away and lay his head back down on the pillows.

'Doesn't sound like nothing.' Morgan said.

'It's the meds and getting from the gurney to the bed.' Emily said.

'It hurt.' Reid said.

'Doctor Giordano will be here shortly. I'd rather not issue you any further medication until he makes his assessment but if you're experiencing a high level of pain I can see what I can do to make you more comfortable.' The nurse said.

Reid shook his head. 'I am comfortable and I'd rather not take any more narcotics.' He snapped.

'Hey, Reid, play nice.' Morgan said as the nurse took the second basin from Emily and made to leave the room.

'I'm sorry, I... I'm a little tired and I can't think clearly as it is so giving me more just...I apologise.' Reid said, blushing a little.

'It's ok, I'll see what's keeping the doctor.' She said.

'I think he's with a colleague of ours.' Morgan said helpfully.

'I'll track him down.' She smiled and left the room.

'Rossi.' Morgan said in response to the questioning looks he was getting from both Emily and Reid. He shrugged. 'I think he knows the guy.'

* * *

'So what you're asking is that I lie to him if he asks me about his insurance?' Frankie said with an exasperated sigh. 'Why is nothing simple with you Davie? Why do I allow myself to repeatedly get mixed up in your half cooked schemes?'

Rossi pressed his hands together in mock prayer and looked heavenward. 'An angel, Frankie, an _angel_.' He smirked.

'I love my mother but god knows I could kill her for ever saying those words.' He said.

'Don't joke. You know my line of work.' Rossi said.

'Dave, the doctor patient relationship is built on trust. I won't lie to my patient.' Frankie said seriously.

'But if he doesn't ask?' Rossi prodded.

Frankie sighed. 'You should just tell him that you're footing the bill.'

'He won't accept it.' Rossi replied. 'Too stubborn and too used to taking care of himself.' He sighed and stared at his old friend. 'Look, I didn't get the opportunity to do anything for my own son. Let me do this for someone else's.'

'If he doesn't ask I won't tell.' Frankie finally said.

* * *

'Good to meet you Spencer.' Dr Giordano held his hand out to his patient and didn't appear at all phased when his patient just gave him a small wave back. 'Nurse Lowe tells me the transfer was a little rough on you.' He said as he flipped through the chart.

'I'm ok. It hurt and the pain combined with the kinetosis I experienced during the transfer induced vomiting.' Reid replied.

'Kinetosis?' Morgan said, his brows raised.

'Motion sickness.' Reid said. 'My vestibular system's sense of movement was in disagreement with my visually perceived movement in both the aircraft and the ambulance. Unlike other causes of nausea vomiting in kinetosis does little to relieve the nausea, however I am feeling a little better now.'

'You couldn't just say you were travel sick?' Rossi said. 'Dr Spencer Reid meet Dr Francis Giordano.'

'I'm glad your stomach's settling.' Frankie said. 'So, let's get down to business. You're here for Spinal Fusion, which I have to agree you are a really good candidate for. Just looking at your previous MRI's tells me that.'

Emily curled her hand around Spencer's. 'Will it reduce the amount of pain he has, day to day?' She asked.

'It's a more stable solution than kyphoplasty so I would say that you'll feel a significant reduction in the pain you experience plus a wider range of mobility.' Frankie said, addressing Reid directly. 'Do you usually rely on walking aids?' He asked.

Spencer nodded. 'I use canes mostly and a wheelchair when I experience a greater level of discomfort.'

'And how often would you say you use the chair, say over a period of six months?' Frankie asked.

'Three, maybe four times.' Reid replied.

'OK. I think I can resolve that for you. First things first though. I want to have this conversation again when you're a little more alert.' Frankie said as he noted Reid's eyes drooping. 'I'm going to come back later this evening to check the incision site from your abdominal surgery and to talk you through the procedure. Before then I want you to have at least six hours sleep.' Frankie stepped back from the bed and addressed the others. 'You all look like you could use some sleep too so I suggest you go home and come back in the morning so you can visit before the surgery.'

'You're doing it tomorrow?' Emily said.

Frankie nodded. 'The longer we leave it the longer he stays in that bed and with a stomach wound to heal from that's not good. I want him up and about.' He said.

'Right.' Emily said as she squeezed Reid's hand tighter.

'Walking promotes healing.' Reid said as his eyes drooped closed again.

'What?' Emily said.

'Walking after surgery promotes healing. It's why nursing staff are keen for patients to get out of bed promptly after surgical procedures. The movement encourages oxygen flow which in turn allows for normal breathing and builds muscle tone. When you're moving around your blood flow increases and so does the healing process.' Reid said as he finally allowed his eyes to close fully and his brain to drift in to sleep.

'I'll wake him back up and ask him about the healing properties of sleep if you don't all get out of here now.' Dr Giordano joked.

Emily leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Spencer's lips, lingering just long enough to feel the warmth on her own. 'I'll be back tomorrow. I love you.' She whispered.

* * *

'Man, I have never wanted sleep so bad.' Morgan groaned as he drew up to Emily's apartment.

'You didn't sleep well back at the hotel?' She asked.

Morgan shook his head. 'You'd think that with all the hotels we sleep in I'd be used to it but nothing beats your own bed does it?'

'You got that right.' Emily said as she gathered her things.

'You want me to walk you up there?' Morgan asked.

'I think I'll be fine.' She smiled. 'Thanks for the ride Morgan and...well thanks for everything over the past few days. I don't know what I'd have done without you to keep me sane.'

'Any time Prentiss, any time.'

Emily was silent for a moment, her fingers playing with the door handle. 'Do you think he'll be ok?' She asked.

'Reid?' He asked. 'I think he'll be fine. He gets this surgery and there will be no stopping him.' He said.

I'm serious Derek. He's scared and I don't want for him to do this and his health be no better, I want... I want...' She stopped and blew out a long breath.

'You want what?' Morgan asked.

'I want a future with him, one that doesn't include a wheelchair and I feel guilty as hell for admitting it.'

'You want the man you are in love with to be well, what's to feel guilty about? I love him too and I'd be happy as anything for him to be fixed.' He held up a hand when Emily moved to speak. 'I know, I know, there is no totally fixed in this situation but I can hope can't I? It's ok to be scared and it's ok to hope for a perfect outcome. It doesn't mean that you don't want him unless he's perfect.'

She shook her head. 'I'd take him anyway I could get him.' She said as she scrubbed the tears from her eyes.

'What you need is sleep so go in there, take a long soak in the tub and then go to bed. In the morning I'll pick you up and we'll go back to the hospital.'

Emily leaned across the seat and hugged her friend. 'I will but only if you do the same too. You look like crap.' She laughed.

* * *

When Reid woke up he felt better. His eyes weren't sore and gritty, his limbs no longer felt jumpy with fatigue and for the first time in days he was alone. In the past he would have been grateful for the reprieve in social demands but he'd got used to _not_ being alone now and he felt somewhat at a loss without Emily by his side.

Experimentally he moved his left leg. A bolt of pain shot down the limb making the muscles below his lumbar region feel so weak he was glad of the catheter he was wearing. He wiggled his toes minutely, aware of the warm, pseudo wet feeling his foot had. Nerve damage. It felt worse than usual.

Drawing a deep breath he opened his eyes and calmed his nerves. Maybe tonight would be the last time he would feel like this. Maybe tonight would be the last time he checked his every movement, maybe after tonight he could allow himself to indulge in the fantasies he never allowed himself to have; Fantasies where, years down the line, he and Emily were happy, where he was healthy and could be everything she needed, fantasies where he had managed to give her children, fantasies where he could play with them. Closing his eyes again he allowed himself to hope.

A knock on the door frame and a slight clearing of a throat made him open his eyes.

'I'm sorry if I woke you Dr Reid.' Erin Strauss said. 'May I come in?'

'Of course.' Reid cleared his throat and tried to shift himself higher in the bed.

'Please, don't sit up. Agent Hotchner has appraised me of your medical situation, I know it's difficult for you.' She said as she placed a small potted fern on his bedside table. 'I wasn't sure if you were allowed plants in your room. Different hospitals seem to have differing rules.'

'I think the rule generally applies mainly to ICU's, would you like to sit down?' Reid said.

Erin pulled up one of the chairs and sat.

* * *

The persistently ringing phone woke Rossi from a pleasant dream.

'It better be good and it better not require me to get out of this bed.' He growled down the receiver.

'David.'

'Erin?'

'I just came from visiting Dr Reid in the hospital David and I'm confused as to why he thinks that the bureau are paying his medical bills in full.' She said.

Rossi rolled onto his back and groaned. 'Please tell me you didn't tell him otherwise Erin.' He said.

'He's a genius David. I rather think he put it together himself when I apologised for the lack of cover extended to him. ' She replied.

Rossi sighed and ended the call. He scrubbed his hand over his eyes and got up. As he grabbed for his robe his eyes fell onto the framed photograph that stood on his night stand. Picking it up he smiled and swiped his thumb across the image of the dark haired woman cradling the carefully wrapped body of a very tiny baby.

'What were you always saying to me about _the best laid plans_ Caro?' He said tiredly. 'Well, I went and did it again, didn't I.'

**CMCM**


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer; I do not own Criminal Minds and no profit is made in any way from this story. It is written for fun and to practice the craft of writing only.**

**Some language and adult situations within this chapter.**

**Chapter Twenty Eight**

**The Consultant**

It was late but Reid was too agitated to sleep after Strauss had visited with him. He wanted to get out of bed and pace, well, his version of pacing that he sometimes would do back in his office on campus when he was thinking through one of Jason's "hypothetical" problems. But he couldn't even make his body work enough to get out of bed and this wasn't a hypothetical problem. The whole of him, body and mind, hurt from thinking. Screwing up his eyes he pressed his head back into the pillows and wished he had kept himself safe and had never allowed himself to be hooked by Jason Gideon and the BAU. But it wasn't Jason or his job at the BAU that had stirred up his safe life, it was Emily and her passion and sex and the temptation of a different life and Morgan and the others and their easy friendship and support that had dropped into his dried up existence and spread hope like a lake. He swallowed hard as tears started to snake from his eyes into his hairline.

'Are you in pain?'

He opened his eyes to find a nurse looking down at him.

'I can get you something if you need it.' She said.

He shook his head. 'No...thank you.' He swallowed hard. 'The pain's no worse.' He said.

'Worried about the procedure tomorrow?' She asked.

"_I'm worried about how it will feel when I say I'm not having it. I'm worried about how it will feel to let go of everything I almost had_." he thought.

When he didn't answer, but a further cascade of tears slid to his pillow, she dug into her scrubs and pulled out an MP3 player.

'You want to borrow this?' She said. 'I have just the playlist to help you relax and sleep.'

Spencer nodded dumbly and she fitted the buds into his ears and thumbed the dial, allowing a relaxing melody to sing though the headphones.

'Thank you.' He said.

'Repay me by getting some sleep. You'll need all you can get for tomorrow.' She smiled and left the room.

Spencer stared at the ceiling and clutched the MP3 to his chest. He couldn't go through with the procedure. He couldn't take that charity from Rossi and allow the whole teams interference in his life. He and he alone looked after himself and he couldn't change that now. Closing his eyes he allowed the music to wash over him and against all odds exhaustion pulled him toward sleep.

* * *

Emily's fingers clutched at the smooth back of the dining chair, the polished surface sliding under her finger tips. The curve of the wood met the warmth of Spencer's strong shoulders and her hand gripped the top of his arm as he pushed into her.

'_This is wrong,'_ she thought absently. The night he fucked her in the chair, in front of the picture window, she had her back to his chest when she seated herself in his lap, but now they were face to face, his breath ghosting her cheek, fingers tangling her hair, pulling her closer for a deep kiss.

His hands moved from her hair and down her bare back to rest on her hips.

'_I'm naked.'_ She said.

'_You are.'_ Spencer agreed, smiling against her mouth.

'_You're not.'_ She said.

He bit her lip playfully and she gasped. _'You must really like me in this shirt.'_ He said.

She did. He was wearing her favourite, his blue dress shirt and dark suit pants. The top buttons of his shirt were open revealing a hint of pale skin, his tie, still on, was tugged loosely to the side and the bite of his open zipper against her inner thighs told her he hadn't even bothered to push his pants down before entering her.

'_I'm the wrong way around.' _She gasped. _'We didn't do it like this.'_

He didn't answer. Instead he sucked her tongue into his mouth and grasped her hips as he rose fluidly from the chair without unseating her from her place on his cock. She wrapped her legs around his waist and gasped, her arms clasped around his neck, her mouth still filled with his tongue.

The cold dining room wall meeting her back made her cry out, her arms loosened from around his neck and flailed, palms flattened against the wall. Her nails scraped at the paintwork as he pulled away from her tongue and pressed his mouth against the junction of her neck and shoulder. He sucked hard and jostled her slightly to get his hands beneath her ass. His fingers kneaded her flesh and he groaned as he started to thrust into her, slowly at first until his hips gained momentum and he was powerfully fucking her against the wall, her legs locked around his waist. Her shoulders thumped rhythmically against the wall and she allowed her head to fall forward onto his shoulder, her teeth grazing his skin as she stifled a moan. _'We should be quieter'_ she gasped. _'My neighbours will wonder what all the banging is.' _

'_But you don't want me to stop.' _Spencer breathed_, _his words even, as though he was hardly exerting himself at all._ 'You want me to hold you like this. For all your bravado Special Agent Emily Prentiss, you want me to be the one in control, you want me to take charge.' _He smiled as he bumped her against the wall, his rhythm building.

_Thump_

_Thump_

_Thump_

Louder and more persistent as he worked against her, louder and deeper and ..._'Oh'_ she gasped, she was going to...

_Thump_

_Thump_

_Thump_

Just a few more moments, just a couple more deep strokes from him and she was..._'Oh god, Spencer, please._'

'_Unfortunately this one's all down to you.'_ He laughed.

_Thump_

'_What?' _She gasped.

_Thump_

_Thump_, knock, knock, knock.

Emily shot upright in her bed, her heart pounding and a familiar sweet tension deep in her groin. Someone was at the door and their persistent knocking had woken her.

It took her a moment to orient herself to the fact that she was alone and Spencer was not here and was not holding her against the dining room wall making her sweat and moan. Taking a steadying breath she grabbed her robe from the foot of the bed and fought her way over the pillows she had hugged throughout the night, pillows that smelled of Spencer in a bed that still smelled of sex.

Pushing a tangle of sweaty hair out of her face and hastily fastening her robe she raced to the door.

'Morgan?' She pulled the door wide and gestured for him to come in. 'What are you doing here at,' she glanced at the clock on the wall, '_six thirty_?'

'I thought you might want to get to the hospital extra early. Give yourself a chance to have more than a flying visit with pretty boy before they take him down to surgery.' Morgan said. 'But if you're planning on sleeping in I can come back later?' He teased.

Emily's eyes swam with tears as she threw one arm around his neck in an awkward embrace. 'Stay right there mister. I will be showered and dressed in fifteen minutes.' She said as she turned and flew down the hallway.

* * *

David Rossi wasn't one for sleeping in, even when he had a beautiful woman in his bed and less so when he didn't.

Sometimes he annoyed himself with his almost pathological need to get up and start the day, especially when the cases were hard and the nights long and all he wanted to do when he finally had a few days off was sleep and sleep hard. Instead 6am usually found him in his study with a cup of good coffee and either his latest book notes or a stack of his cold cases that he'd illegally copied and taken home. Maybe one day, when all the cases were solved and there were no more stories to tell, maybe then he'd sleep in he thought before shaking his head and laughing at himself for being an old fool.

Today he was showered, dressed and breakfasted all by 7am and had been in his car heading for Glenwood Cemetery by 7.30.

He knew the way to his son's grave with his eyes closed and found himself smiling slightly when he saw the neatly tied small bunch of white daisies laid on top of the simple stone. He'd reached out and brushed the petals, his fingers dipping down and stroking the cool white marble gently. '_Caroline.' _She'd been here recently. He closed his eyes, inhaled the fresh morning air and let his hand fall from the stone. After a few moments immersed in the tranquillity of the place he opened his eyes, pulled a single flower stem from the bunch that his ex wife had left for their child and headed back to his car.

It was nearing 8.30 when he arrived at the clinic, definitely too early to get a face full of a _very_ pissed off Derek Morgan.

* * *

Rossi knew without doubt that Morgan was using every inch of his self control not to bodily shove him into the wall.

'What are you playing at Rossi?' He demanded. 'Why do Prentiss and I have Reid ripping us a new one this morning and why is he saying he's not having the surgery if it's _charity_?' Morgan ran his hand over his head and stepped back to thump the wall behind him. 'What the hell were you thinking? And Hotch, not to mention Garcia, I mean, seriously you got Garcia in on this too!'

'It was nothing to do with Aaron or Penelope, Derek. It was my call.'

'_Your_ _call_? He's not your son Rossi, his life choices aren't something you _get_ to make a call on! Do you know that right now he's asking Emily to arrange a transfer to the closest hospital that takes his HMO so he can have that goddamn useless patch up work done.' Morgan snapped.

Rossi shook his head. 'She's not gonna let him?' He said.

'_**Yes **_she is, Rossi, because she respects him and as much as she knows what she wants this is about what _**he**_ wants, it's about how he's a grown man and should be afforded control over _**his own life**_ and how his friends should recognise and honour that!' Morgan yelled.

'Hey...what's with all the angst?' Garcia's voice came from the hallway.

'Baby girl, you know how much I love you right?' Morgan said, his eyes never leaving Rossi.

'To the moon and back?' She wavered.

'Damn straight girl, but I'm a little angry with you right now for letting yourself get brow beat by Rossi and Hotch yesterday, so if we could have a little distance for a few ok?'

'Derek...'Garcia started. 'David Rossi I told you this was a bad idea but would you listen! Derek, is he really mad?' She asked.

Morgan looked at them both and shook his head, his shoulders slumping. 'He doesn't want the surgery. I'm gonna go see how he and Emily are doing and you two, I think you should go home.'

He had almost reached the door when Rossi landed his hand heavily on his shoulder.

'This is _bullshit_ Derek!' Rossi growled. '"Respect that he's an adult and stand by as he makes a huge mistake because we're friends?" We're _not_ friends Derek, what we go through, what we see together, what we are to each other is _family_ and you're right, he's not my son but hell if I'm not gonna go in there and smack some sense into him just like my old man woulda' done to me.'

* * *

Emily slid out of the door and straight into Rossi.

'I _am_ sorry, Princess, but only because he found out before it was done and I won't apologise. To either of you.' He said stubbornly, before she could speak first.

She smiled weakly. 'I wouldn't expect you to Rossi, but maybe you could have just tried talking to him first though.' She sighed.

'He would never have agreed.' Rossi said simply.

'I know.' She nodded and tried but failed to tuck her hair behind her ears.

'You look tired.' He said as he re-tucked the strand of hair for her.

'Stupid dreams waking me up.' She said. 'Really stupid.' She shook her head and swallowed down a fresh batch of tears.

'Let me talk with him Emily. Let's see if we can make those dreams less stupid. _Please_.' Rossi asked.

Emily nodded and stepped away from the door and away from the room.

* * *

Reid felt like he'd run a marathon and it was still before nine am. He had launched into Emily and Morgan as soon as they had arrived in his room only to find they were as in the dark as he was. Something in their shocked faces has lifted the pressure in his chest a little as it dawned on him that they hadn't been the engineers of the deception.

He'd been ready to argue all his reasons for turning down Rossi's charity but they'd died on his tongue when Emily and Morgan both said that he should choose whatever he wanted to do and that they would stand by him.

He'd taken a deep breath and held Emily's gaze when he asked her to cancel the surgery and get him transferred. In that second he saw right through her to the disappointment that filled her chest so full that she faltered when she tried to take her next breath and the tears that brimmed her lower lids only to be determinedly blinked back. His own chest felt as though it would crack when she took his hand firmly and asked him which hospital he wanted to go to. In that moment, when she handed control back to him, he loved her more than ever, and hated himself. Why couldn't he just accept help, if not for himself then for her?

The door whooshed open and he prepared himself for Dr Giordano, but when he opened his eyes he found himself staring at a grim faced David Rossi.

Rossi ignored Reid's frown and pulled up a chair, doing nothing to quiet the obnoxious squeak it made against the linoleum flooring. 'So,' he said, 'how are we gonna do this? Am I gonna have to spend the next half hour convincing you of why you should take what I can give you while you try to convince me otherwise?'

Reid swallowed and narrowed his eyes. 'You had no right to lie to me, I trusted you, all of you.'

'Yes you did, when you fitted yourself into this team you trusted us all, the same way Morgan does and JJ, even Hotch. You trusted us to have your back. That's all we were doing kid, having your back.'

'I'm not a _kid_ David and having my back isn't lying to me!' Reid grimaced in pain as his leg jerked reflexively. 'You have no idea how hard I've had to fight to keep everything under my control and you have no idea why it's important to me, you've never had to go up against what I've had to.' He snapped.

'You're right Spencer, I have no idea about what you've been through or how high the stakes were when you were a child or why you felt as though you had to take charge so young, but I do know about now, right now, about the life you are going to throw away for _nothing_!'

'It's not nothing!' Reid said, tears threatening to start again. 'It's about living on my own terms David, a concept that you have no idea about because you've always had control, you never have to cede it to anyone and I have. Every time I get sick and I have to give myself over to doctors and hospitals, strangers helping me move, use the bathroom, dress and...and...you couldn't begin to understand.'

'So take charge Dr Reid! Take this one, small helping hand and be in control the rest of your life! Take control and choose a future, choose an amazing woman, a great job, kids and not to spend life after thirty in a fucking wheelchair!' Rossi stood up so quickly the chair beneath him fell to the floor with a clatter. Breathing heavily he strode over to the window and leaned his head against it, watching the early morning traffic below start to build.

'I can't. I could never pay you back.' Reid whispered, his voice cracking.

Rossi whirled back from the window, reached into his jacket pocket and dragged his wallet free. 'I don't care!' He yelled. 'How much of this do you think I have? Millions, I have millions of these stupid green pieces of paper and very little else, my son, _my own son_...no amount of money could have saved him Spencer so for Christ's sake just let me help someone else's son, let me help you!'

The room was silent apart from Rossi's laboured breathing and Reids' own trembling breath. He'd never seen Rossi so passionate, so vehement. He tried to keep a defiant expression on his face but the pain and fatigue and Rossi's emotional state made it impossible and his chin trembled as the other man stared at him, dollar bills crumpled in his hand. As he watched Reid's chin tremble he deflated and dropped the bills on Reid's bed.

'I would like to think that if my son had lived someone would have helped him if he had needed it and I wasn't around.' He righted the chair and sat back down. 'Please Spencer, let me help, let me spend my money on something other than works of art and Italian leather shoes.' He pleaded.

Reid closed his eyes and took a steadying breath. 'How will I pay you back.' He whispered.

'You can owe me.' Rossi smiled in triumph.

* * *

'We all good?' Dr Giordano said as he strode into the room. 'The atmosphere in here suggests otherwise.' He quipped as he scanned Reid's chart. 'Problems?' He asked.

Emily, who was sat by Reid holding his hand shook her head.

'Just nerves.' Morgan said.

'I told him, no need to be nervous.' Rossi said.

Dr Giordano hooked the chart back onto the foot of Reids' bed and looked at his patient. He looked exhausted. 'Ok, without the gallery throwing their two cents in, Spencer is everything ok, you still want to go ahead today?'

Reid glanced at Rossi as he squeezed Emily's hand. 'Yes.' He said firmly. 'I want to go ahead.'

Dr Giordano smiled. 'Great. So what I'll do is start by making a small incision just above your hip so I can harvest the bone graft material from your pelvis. Once I have that secured I'll make a further incision in your side to access the damaged lower vertebrae. I'll clean out the deteriorated bone fragments; pack the graft material between the vertebrae and then work on fixing the screws. We'll be done in four hours tops and all you need to do for me is sleep, ok?' He smiled at Reid who looked a little pale. 'This will make a significant improvement to your life Dr Reid, I'm sure of it. I'll see you in there.' He smiled and left the room.

* * *

Spencer looked at the fingers entwined with his and then back up to the clock on the wall facing the bed.

'It's nearly time.' He said, clenching Emily's fingers harder.

'It is.' She said calmly.

'You should go home and get some sleep during the procedure, you really don't need to stay.'

'Don't make me slap you.' Emily smiled as she leaned forward and hugged him. 'I will be here, during and after and nothing you can say will make me leave.' She whispered in his ear.

He hugged her back and she felt his breathing hitch.

'Thank you.' She said.

'For what?'

'For doing this, for giving everything we want to have a chance. I know it's scary for you.'

'I yelled at you, earlier, you and Morgan. You shouldn't be thanking me.' He said as he pulled back and caressed the side of her face. 'Will you tell him I'm sorry?'

Emily smiled. 'Tell him yourself mister, you're the one that tore him a new one as soon as he walked in and he's a bear when he's unjustly accused. You can straighten that mess out yourself.'

Spencer smiled, momentarily distracted from his situation. 'I'm so afraid Emily.' He said finally.

'Dr Giordano is one of the best, the surgery will go just fine.' Emily said.

'And afterwards?' He said.

'The PT? I'll help, and Morgan said...' Emily started but was cut off by Spencer shaking his head.

'I've been this way for so long, I'm scared about how I'll feel, how things might be when I'm...different. I'm sorry, I'm not making sense, I can't articulate what I mean.' He laughed. 'I have entire dictionaries inside my head and I can't articulate a simple emotion.'

Emily pulled his hand into hers again. 'That's because emotions aren't simple, fear isn't simple, you know that. Whatever the future brings, however this turns out we will face it together.' She pressed her lips to his fingers and smiled.

The door swung open and a nurse and two orderlies walked in. 'It's time.' The nurse said with a smile.

* * *

'Four hours on a beach goes by like that.' Garcia snapped her fingers and sighed. 'Four hours in the mall and I don't even notice it but as soon as you set foot in a hospital waiting room four hours is an eternity.' She complained.

Morgan stretched himself out on the ugly Naugahyde couch. 'I'll bet Reid would have a theory on it.' He yawned.

'Or a rebuttal.' Hotch said.

'Definitely a rebuttal.' JJ said into her tea cup.

'You ok Princess?' Rossi asked Emily as she stared out of the window. 'Hmm?' She replied absently.

'I asked if you were ok.' He replied gently. 'You could go get some sleep you know. We'll stay here. You look tired.'

Emily shook her head. 'I'm ok, I was just thinking.'

'What about?' Rossi pressed.

She shook her head. 'Just...I...I don't know.'

Rossi rubbed her shoulder and guided her back to the enclave of couches the team had sequestered. 'Talk to us.'

She scrubbed at her face and sighed. 'I was thinking about all the things I want and I was wondering if this time I'll get them, I was thinking about a friend of mine, she's...she's going to have a baby and when I see the expression on her face as she talks about this...life ...this potential growing inside of her, I know that I want that, I want a family and a life outside of work and I want it with Spencer.'

'And this is the first step bella, this is the first step.' Rossi said.

'Rossi's right.' Morgan agreed, 'although you might want to let Reid get back on his feet before you try to get him off them again.' He quipped.

Emily felt the smile break her face and a small break from the tension in her body relax her as she laughed. 'Thanks Morgan, I'll try to bear that in mind.' She said.

* * *

Dr Giordano made some additional notes to Reids' chart as the nursing staff fitted the new brace around his lower back and dressed him in a fresh gown. He passed the chart to the recovery room nurse and lowered the lights situated above the bed.

'He's doing well.' The nurse commented.

'Yes he is.' Giordano smiled as he pulled off his surgical cap and tossed it into the trash. 'Monitor him hourly and call me if anything changes, oh and Ellen, I know you don't like it but I'm going to send his partner back for a quick visit.'

Ellen rolled her eyes and sighed.

'I know, I know, it's against procedure. Think yourself lucky it'll only be the one. I'll have to fight back five others wanting to come through.' He laughed as he made his way to the waiting area.

* * *

Emily was on her feet as soon as the doors to the surgical unit opened.

'How is he?' She asked as the rest of the team rose.

'He's doing well.' Dr Giordano said. 'He came through the procedure nicely and the graft and fusion went without any complications. I'm very pleased with the outcome.' He smiled and patted Emily's arm. 'You can come back for a short while but the rest of you will have to wait until tomorrow to see him. He's sleeping now and I'd expect him to sleep on and off for the rest of the day.'

The entire team let out a breath that they hadn't realised they had been holding since the surgeon had walked in and the tension that had built up over the four hours spent in the waiting area evaporated instantly.

'Thank you.' Morgan said as he held his hand out to the doctor.

'It's a pleasure.'

As the team erupted into smiles and hugs Rossi walked over to his old friend and smiled. 'You did a very good thing here today little Frankie, your momma would be proud.'

Dr Giordano smiled as he watched the relieved team. 'And this good deed repays that favour you did for me in full Davey?'

'Oh, I think it gets you a lot closer Frankie, a lot closer.' Rossi smiled.

'Closer! I'm never gonna repay this am I, and now you have another member of the _Friends Who Owe David Rossi Club_. How are you gonna make Dr Reid pay you back, huh?'

'Oh, I don't know yet. I'm sure something will come up.' He said easily.

Frankie clapped him on the shoulder and gave him a warm smile. 'You're a good man David Rossi, a good man.'

'Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm an angel.' Rossi laughed.

* * *

The lights were low. He wanted to open his eyes but they were too heavy and the delicious floating sensation was too comforting to push past. Instead he just lay still. He knew he was in hospital and he knew he'd had surgery. He'd heard the nurse telling him moments before.

He felt anxious and had tried to pry his eyes open until he felt a cool hand brush his forehead and a familiar tickle of long hair as someone leaned over him and pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead.

'I love you Spencer, I love you so much.'

_Emily._

She was there. He'd had the surgery and she was there for him, waiting for him to wake up, just as she said she would be. He smiled and let himself sleep.

**CMCM**


End file.
